I've been lurking around this board for a while and learned a hell of a lot about myself and women, things that I probably wouldn't learn in my lifetime had I not been so hurt by one girl, searched the net to cure my damaged heart and accidentally click a link to SoSuave.com.
I've also noticed that in my short unregistered period here, a number of people have been misinterpreting the DJ mindset. Some strongly advise to cut off all avenues of contact with a girl once she cancels a date. Some strongly advise never to tell a girl you like her. (I'm going to get flamed for my next paragraph and I don't care.)
Bullsh*t.
I'm nowhere near being a DJ. When I was a complete AFC, I got hurt by a horrible, horrible girl who exploited my AFCness. I recoiled and hid, vowing never to get hurt like that again. There's no way I can pretend it didn't hurt me, in much the same way some of the guys on here try to pretend they can simply and coldheartedly scream "NEXT!" at the top of their lungs when HB8 Yvonne calls to cancel a date in favour of taking her gerbil to the vet.
I have emotions. I have never and will never see them as a weakness, in spite of what acting solely upon them has gotten me into.
Example: I pick up signs of high interest from a girl I knew vaguely, so I spend time getting to know her. Turns out that we have a lot in common, and she's not bad-looking either. Her interest increases as we get to know each other.
Her interest is through the roof, so I ask her to come out on a date. She accepts without thinking, but cancels a day before. Second time I ask her out on a date she flakes. Am I going to give up? Hell, no. Wanna know why? Because I like her. I'm not afraid to say it.
It's not one-itis. I'm just not going to give up on this one because she pushes my buttons, and such women are hard to find these days.
What's my point? Use all the DJ techniques you want, whether or not it suits your personality. But sooner or later, your emotions or instincts are going to throw you for a loop. You might get hurt, you might even *GASP* fall in love.
It's nothing to worry about, though.
It shows you're human.
---Cassidy
I've also noticed that in my short unregistered period here, a number of people have been misinterpreting the DJ mindset. Some strongly advise to cut off all avenues of contact with a girl once she cancels a date. Some strongly advise never to tell a girl you like her. (I'm going to get flamed for my next paragraph and I don't care.)
Bullsh*t.
I'm nowhere near being a DJ. When I was a complete AFC, I got hurt by a horrible, horrible girl who exploited my AFCness. I recoiled and hid, vowing never to get hurt like that again. There's no way I can pretend it didn't hurt me, in much the same way some of the guys on here try to pretend they can simply and coldheartedly scream "NEXT!" at the top of their lungs when HB8 Yvonne calls to cancel a date in favour of taking her gerbil to the vet.
I have emotions. I have never and will never see them as a weakness, in spite of what acting solely upon them has gotten me into.
Example: I pick up signs of high interest from a girl I knew vaguely, so I spend time getting to know her. Turns out that we have a lot in common, and she's not bad-looking either. Her interest increases as we get to know each other.
Her interest is through the roof, so I ask her to come out on a date. She accepts without thinking, but cancels a day before. Second time I ask her out on a date she flakes. Am I going to give up? Hell, no. Wanna know why? Because I like her. I'm not afraid to say it.
It's not one-itis. I'm just not going to give up on this one because she pushes my buttons, and such women are hard to find these days.
What's my point? Use all the DJ techniques you want, whether or not it suits your personality. But sooner or later, your emotions or instincts are going to throw you for a loop. You might get hurt, you might even *GASP* fall in love.
It's nothing to worry about, though.
It shows you're human.
---Cassidy
Much better off going for somethin else.