Last night, I got totally drunk at a party, ended up running into my ex, and told her I missed her sometimes. Truth is, I don't want her back, I was just drunk. I'm sure she realizes this, but I just laid myself out on the railroad tracks and got run over by her for no reason. It would've never happened had I been sober. Then some tall, good looking dude that's laid two of the last girls I've slept with took her home at the end of the party. Regarding the guy, I have nothing against him personally as I've never talked to him and I almost feel flattered that he goes after some of the same girls I get; it says a lot about my looks being not so bad.
I also feel like to play the numbers game like this at a party, you need to be somewhat drunk, which is utterly awful for me because I'm on anti-depressants and have major problems with depression. I'm feeling very, very low right now. My serotonin levels are probably taking a nosedive and my overall emotional state is just tumbling down the side of a mountain with total reckless abandon. I feel like I'm being smashed into this couch by an unnatural weight of sadness. I partially did it to myself by interacting with my ex in the way I did, but throwing myself out there every weekend and getting rejected by so many girls in the outer range of my social circles also has something to do with it.
In terms of her actual likelihood to come out on a date, I got a mediocre number last night. I mean, look at this SMS interchange:
Me: "Hola [name] =). So when are we gonna grab a coffee this week? -blueline"
Her: "Hi! I am insanely busy with student teaching. [dun dun dun, potential excuse #1] Maybe some night later this week?"
Me: "OK. Let's do this around 8 at starbucks this Thursday."
Her: "Can we do it around 7? Also, you're going to have to remind me when it's closer. I'm ridiculously forgetful" [boom excuse #2. also, serves as wonderful IOD. girls that actually want you are rarely forgetful about a date]
Me: "Sure, 7 works for me."
Her: "Great. Hasta luego!"
I've seen this sort of **** so much. It's not like this is a random bar pickup, the girl is more or less from a social circle I belong to, so you probably shouldn't expect Paul Janka's 11% successful closing rate rule to hold. Maybe I'll text her sometime on Tuesday not even reminding her, but rather, just saying hi and saying something funny. If she doesn't come out on Thursday after that, then whatever. I could've probably replied to her first text by saying "Alright, maybe we'll grab a coffee sometime you're less busy", but then she's just gonna come out due to her ego getting a bit of a ding from me. When she notices that I want her, she'll retract and I won't get laid. Or maybe I'll get laid and even form a relationship with her, but one of it's foundational blocks is going to be this manipulative nonsense. I have to pretend not to care at all and be constantly giving her backhanded compliments, which will result in a lot of unpleasantness in my direction. This is just emotional manipulation, it isn't anything remotely related to sexual attraction or something you can build a mutually respectful relationship with. I'm not just trying to bang girls, I like relationships. However, I don't start relations with women in the frame of wanting a relationship. However, the endgame is finding the ones I can have relationships with, though. I feel like sex isn't really that big of a deal.
Maybe you guys will have issues with the way I asked her out on the first text, but I shoot straight from the hip with women. Instead of wasting my time on some bullshit interaction that would merely serve to entertain her and not actually make her sexually attracted (face it, you cannot make someone sexually with text messages), I just state my intentions. This method has a 100% success rate with girls that like me. When it works, girls will respond in a super flirty way and give you zero IOD's.
A normal guy gets phone numbers maybe a few times a year. Often he'll never even call them. Maybe he'll ask girls out 8 or 9 times in his life and this is only when he knows it's a given that she'll come out. I probably got something like 20-30 numbers in the last 5-6 months and asked out around 15-20 girls. Only like 5 or 6 actually came out on dates with me. Only 3 of them had sex with me. These girls were pretty but they were either mentally compromised or loose women that fuck anybody. I could get laid a TON more if I lowered my standards, but what's the point of that? I can't get it up for ugly girls and I'm just gonna break their hearts when I leave them after the temporary ego boost from having sex with a new girl subsides.
Should I really not give a single shit about a girl before I have sex with her? I've stripped away almost any emotion tied to the initial stages of getting girls. My process is so mechanical. I see pickup as two conversations going on simultaneously.
The first is the actual verbal conversation that is basically a smoke screen of friendliness. For the purposes of finding out if the girl is interested, this conversation is mostly meaningless. The other conversation is this non-verbal pinging (anybody familiar with computer networks will know what I mean here) conversation where your body language is basically saying "hmmm i wanna have sex with you" or "nope, not interested." All you're looking for is confirmation that she's interested in that conversation. Usually, especially in a bar, if the second non-verbal conversation isn't immediately clicking, I hit the road. With hot chicks, this second conversation is a guessing game. I rarely see the clicking effect that occurs with the less hot chicks. Girls will still give you their numbers when the second conversation does not click, but these numbers are usually useless. However, I've been in situations where the second conversation does not click until I verbally indicate interest (probably because the girl is scared of me rejecting her), but this causes me to have to lay my ass on the line and it's really rare that I have to do this.
The verbal conversation matters so little sometimes that I can tell girls I'm clinically depressed and have suicidal ideations every now and then (that I reject and dismiss as nonsense, obviously) and have sex with them 2 hours later on the first date.
Regardless, I'm thinking of taking a break and dropping out of all edgy, party type social groups for a while, which means no more pickup. The party girls totally suck as people anyways. I can't handle more days like this.
I also feel like to play the numbers game like this at a party, you need to be somewhat drunk, which is utterly awful for me because I'm on anti-depressants and have major problems with depression. I'm feeling very, very low right now. My serotonin levels are probably taking a nosedive and my overall emotional state is just tumbling down the side of a mountain with total reckless abandon. I feel like I'm being smashed into this couch by an unnatural weight of sadness. I partially did it to myself by interacting with my ex in the way I did, but throwing myself out there every weekend and getting rejected by so many girls in the outer range of my social circles also has something to do with it.
In terms of her actual likelihood to come out on a date, I got a mediocre number last night. I mean, look at this SMS interchange:
Me: "Hola [name] =). So when are we gonna grab a coffee this week? -blueline"
Her: "Hi! I am insanely busy with student teaching. [dun dun dun, potential excuse #1] Maybe some night later this week?"
Me: "OK. Let's do this around 8 at starbucks this Thursday."
Her: "Can we do it around 7? Also, you're going to have to remind me when it's closer. I'm ridiculously forgetful" [boom excuse #2. also, serves as wonderful IOD. girls that actually want you are rarely forgetful about a date]
Me: "Sure, 7 works for me."
Her: "Great. Hasta luego!"
I've seen this sort of **** so much. It's not like this is a random bar pickup, the girl is more or less from a social circle I belong to, so you probably shouldn't expect Paul Janka's 11% successful closing rate rule to hold. Maybe I'll text her sometime on Tuesday not even reminding her, but rather, just saying hi and saying something funny. If she doesn't come out on Thursday after that, then whatever. I could've probably replied to her first text by saying "Alright, maybe we'll grab a coffee sometime you're less busy", but then she's just gonna come out due to her ego getting a bit of a ding from me. When she notices that I want her, she'll retract and I won't get laid. Or maybe I'll get laid and even form a relationship with her, but one of it's foundational blocks is going to be this manipulative nonsense. I have to pretend not to care at all and be constantly giving her backhanded compliments, which will result in a lot of unpleasantness in my direction. This is just emotional manipulation, it isn't anything remotely related to sexual attraction or something you can build a mutually respectful relationship with. I'm not just trying to bang girls, I like relationships. However, I don't start relations with women in the frame of wanting a relationship. However, the endgame is finding the ones I can have relationships with, though. I feel like sex isn't really that big of a deal.
Maybe you guys will have issues with the way I asked her out on the first text, but I shoot straight from the hip with women. Instead of wasting my time on some bullshit interaction that would merely serve to entertain her and not actually make her sexually attracted (face it, you cannot make someone sexually with text messages), I just state my intentions. This method has a 100% success rate with girls that like me. When it works, girls will respond in a super flirty way and give you zero IOD's.
A normal guy gets phone numbers maybe a few times a year. Often he'll never even call them. Maybe he'll ask girls out 8 or 9 times in his life and this is only when he knows it's a given that she'll come out. I probably got something like 20-30 numbers in the last 5-6 months and asked out around 15-20 girls. Only like 5 or 6 actually came out on dates with me. Only 3 of them had sex with me. These girls were pretty but they were either mentally compromised or loose women that fuck anybody. I could get laid a TON more if I lowered my standards, but what's the point of that? I can't get it up for ugly girls and I'm just gonna break their hearts when I leave them after the temporary ego boost from having sex with a new girl subsides.
Should I really not give a single shit about a girl before I have sex with her? I've stripped away almost any emotion tied to the initial stages of getting girls. My process is so mechanical. I see pickup as two conversations going on simultaneously.
The first is the actual verbal conversation that is basically a smoke screen of friendliness. For the purposes of finding out if the girl is interested, this conversation is mostly meaningless. The other conversation is this non-verbal pinging (anybody familiar with computer networks will know what I mean here) conversation where your body language is basically saying "hmmm i wanna have sex with you" or "nope, not interested." All you're looking for is confirmation that she's interested in that conversation. Usually, especially in a bar, if the second non-verbal conversation isn't immediately clicking, I hit the road. With hot chicks, this second conversation is a guessing game. I rarely see the clicking effect that occurs with the less hot chicks. Girls will still give you their numbers when the second conversation does not click, but these numbers are usually useless. However, I've been in situations where the second conversation does not click until I verbally indicate interest (probably because the girl is scared of me rejecting her), but this causes me to have to lay my ass on the line and it's really rare that I have to do this.
The verbal conversation matters so little sometimes that I can tell girls I'm clinically depressed and have suicidal ideations every now and then (that I reject and dismiss as nonsense, obviously) and have sex with them 2 hours later on the first date.
Regardless, I'm thinking of taking a break and dropping out of all edgy, party type social groups for a while, which means no more pickup. The party girls totally suck as people anyways. I can't handle more days like this.
.