Some logic on DETATCHMENT...

[neobrood]

I've read alot of threads in the donjuan discussion forum and alot of em are asking help on how to get a certain chick to fall in love with them. Some are even trying out all those seduction techniques here... but to no avail... and then end up FRUSTRATED in the end.

Well... that's the reason I found this site in the first place... Cuz I desperately wanted some chick to fall in love with me. Hoping that all the techniques in here will make her get back... I did neghits and C&F to her... they worked... But kino just BLEW IT!

Of course that hurt a lot.

And then... "Oh well... move on to the next chick"...

After getting rejected alot... little by little, I became numb to rejection. When I was rejected at first, it felt extremely painful. As in so painful that I felt like grabbing a gun and shooting myself in the head. But now, pfft... So what if I'm rejected... NEXT!!!

Guess what's the secret?

D-E-T-A-T-C-H-M-E-N-T

Get a piece of paper, apply dollar store paste (one that can only hold paper) on it, and stick it on your left arm. And then get another piece of paper, apply Mighty Bond (or any of those super glue that can glue pieces of wood) on it, and stick it on your right arm.

Leave them there for 10 seconds and then remove them.

What do you think is gonna hurt more? Of course, the arm where you placed mighty bond is gonna hurt more... and you wouldn't be able to remove it just like that. Cuz that paper was ATTATCHED to your arm sooo strong... that it would hurt alot trying to get it off your arm.

Same thing applies to women (and other people). Attatch them to you, leaving them would hurt alot...

But HOW are you supposed to be detatched? Does that mean you have to go to the mountains and become some hermit?

Well... if that makes you HAPPY, do it. But if you know you're not gonna be happy bein a hermit, try getting your a$$ out there and meet more people. Go clubbing//partying more often with existing friends... and try to join all sorts of groups out there that cater to your interests. Sports clubs, Art clubs, even Church youth groups... The more people you've met, the less attatched you'd become to certain people. There are more important things out there and that would give you more options.

Ok... lets say I've been goin to all those clubs and parties... and I got numbers of around 20 HBs... More options... less attatchment. If you only have ONE HB in your list, guess how attatched you will become... and guess how strong the temptation to supplicate to her and kiss her a$$... just to make her like you.

And so what if all 20 HBs rejected you? Being part of those clubs would surely give you at least some FRIENDS to chill out with... and GETTING LAID IS NOT REALLY IMPORTANT IN LIFE!!! The more you attatch yourself to getting laid, the more frustrated you'd become when you fail to get laid.

 

[The Main Event]

Originally posted by neobrood
The more people you've met, the less attatched you'd become to certain people.

Guys, write that one down.

At the root of desperation you will almost invariably find one of two attitudes:

1. "I'll never meet anyone else quite like her. She may or may not be perfect, but she's damn sure extraordinary!"

2. "She's the most attractive, intelligent, personable girl who's ever paid any attention to me. If I don't get her, I've blown the best opportunity I'll ever have!"

The first attitude places the girl on a pedestal - big time. The second attitude treats any interest she might have in you as a fluke, and effectively concedes that girls like her are out of your league. Both attitudes are pure rubbish, and both are fatal to your prospects.

The cure to both of these attitudes is an active social life - one that draws you into contact with a lot of women and therefore a lot of opportunities. Without having met a lot of chicks, you're more vulnerable to what I call the 'pedestal mentality'; you have no point of reference, and therefore it's difficult to believe that Miss Perfect Ten really ain't all that perfect.

Of course, you've got to take advantage of the opportunities your social life offers you. Joining a lot of clubs means meeting a lot of women. It may even mean a lot of women initiating conversation with you. It's up to you to take things further.

That's where the advice you've learnt here comes into play. And with some real opportunities to put that advice to use, that's when you start becoming real good at it. And you *will* become real good at it; the demands of your life will leave you with no choice.

It's a natural process. It's social evolution.


I am
The Main Event.

 

[Beatflux]

This attachment topic brings up the Buddhism's Four Noble Truths. They are:

1.Life is suffering
2. Suffering is derived from Attachment
3.to end suffering you much end attachment
4.Buddhism way of ending attachment

Neobrood is correct to say that our pain comes from the attachment to put on the outcome of the encounter or approach.

To put the term "Attachment" in a more practical sense, it is better to call it resistance as this is the form it takes on in the mind.

The only time we suffer is when we resist. When we resist our feelings, situations, people, social events, or just what is, we suffer. Suffering is never the result of feelings or other people. The phenomeon when we blame others for how we feel is called 'projection'.

For some, the last paragraph is very hard to swallow. Our society is tainted with the idea that we are all victims of other people.

Crossroads: If you want to control how you feel you will need to take responsibility for your emotions. Responsibility does not mean blame.

One way of eliminating resistance is to take on the perspective of the watcher.http://www.trans4mind.com/holosync/principle7.html

When you start to eliminate resistance you will be amazed at what happens. One of the first things that will happen is that you won't really loath bad feelings becuase they don't hurt anymore. After you eliminate your resistance the "bad feeling" just turns out to be a neutral energy and then you just don't care anymore. It goes away very quickly. Much more quickly than if you would have resisted.