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So the BPD wants to move in with me and is trying to manipulate me into letting her.

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This is the story I am getting from my BPD girlfriend. I have no way to verify any of the story is true. I know she is dying to move away from her neighborhood so this could be all fiction from her mouth.

My girl lives in her grandmothers house. Her grandmother passed away and did not leave her the house supposedly. She said her greedy uncle got the house and is going to kick her out and she will have nowhere to go and will be homeless and she can't stay with her family.

I have my own house and I live alone. She has already asked me to move in. I told her it's impossible because I am going to rent my house out because I can't afford it and I am 3 months behind on the mortgage. Then I screwed up. I told her if I could stay in the house I would tell her to move. I said this fully expecting to be renting my house next month. I didn't really mean it, I was just telling her what she wanted to hear.

Well, thanks to Obama's Homeowners act, my mortgage company redid my loan and reduced the payments a HUGE amount and forgave my late payments, so I am staying there now. I told her this (not like I could hide it), and now she is playing a stupid game with me.

She is acting really distant and I know what she is doing. She is hoping I miss her and tell her to come live with me.

When this doesn't work, I know what is going to happen. She is going to come with a sob story that she is getting booted out and if I really loved her I would let her move in.

How am I going to handle this? There is no way I can let her move in.
 

She makes you weak in the knees.

But she won't give you the time of day.

Here is how to get her.

Mex

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Larry, I have made a similar mistake before with a girlfriend. I moved to a new state, and we were apart for a few months. We were about to break up because of the long distance thing, and I told her something I did not mean. I told her that it was too bad she was not living there with me, since I thought that what she wanted to hear.

We did still break up, but a couple of months later, she found a job in the city I live now, and moved here. She told me she was moving here, and I had already moved on. So needless to say, she did get a sub lease for a few months since I told her she could not live with me. However, the girl I had been talking to wanted no part of the drama so that ended. Now my ex's sublease ran up and she told me she could not find another place, or the only vacancies were with male roommates, essentially all excuses to get me to offer her to live with me.

So you are right, she will come with a sob story, but the only thing you can do is man up, tell her you made a mistake by making the offer, which you certainly did, and tell hre your emotions got in the way or something (she is a girl so she understands emotions). After all, you are not lying now. So you just need to let her know that she is not welcome.

I understand my situation was with an ex, and yours is with a current gf. So you just need to be straight up with her now. If she cares about you enough shell understand. If your care about her at all you should be honest, and if you dont care, you should not play with this girl since she seems really attached, and you also mentioned BPD!

My 2 cents. Good luck man.
 

Slickster

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If you don't want her to move in your actions are telling her that you don't want the relationship to move forward.

Sounds like this will be the turning point for you.

What are your intentions with her anyway? Is she just an easy lay for the time being?

I'm of the opinion that if you aren't interested in building on a relationship with a women then you shouldn't be in one.

Cut her loose and go from there.

Nothing wrong with wanting to screw random chicks but if it gets to the "relationship" level then you are wasting everyones time.
 
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Slickster said:
If you don't want her to move in your actions are telling her that you don't want the relationship to move forward.

Sounds like this will be the turning point for you.

What are your intentions with her anyway? Is she just an easy lay for the time being?

I'm of the opinion that if you aren't interested in building on a relationship with a women then you shouldn't be in one.

Cut her loose and go from there.

Nothing wrong with wanting to screw random chicks but if it gets to the "relationship" level then you are wasting everyones time.

I like her and I could see it going forward but she is SHADY. For the first month we went out, she was banging other guys. I forgave that because we were not exclusive.

Then we broke up for a month, and she ran off with another guy while stringing me along like a chump. When he turned out to be a loser, she came back and I finally told her to be exclusive and that was just about 2 months ago.

She has been behaving since we got exclusive... but I am not even CLOSE to knowing her well enough to have her move in. Because once she moves in, she will never leave.

What if she changes? What if she is really a cold b!tch underneath, because that is what I suspect?

Why has she been divorced twice? Why did her fiancee walk out on her?

According to her, it was all the mens fault. Sure.

How crazy can she be to think I will let her move in with me. In fact, I will put it all back on her. If she wasn't slutting around the town and acting shady, maybe I would be ready. But her behavior is making me suspicious and wary of her.

Put it all back on her, that's the way to go and it's the truth. I don't trust her and I can't trust her because of HER actions.
 

Mex

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There is no way around this one. You have to tell her the truth. That you arent ready to live together since you dont know each other well enough. Trust me, if she does turn out to be crazy like you think, then letting her move in will just make it even harder later, and you will have HUGE problems.

At the same time, if you have trust issues with her already, it sounds like a good time to cut her loose, then the question of whether she should move in will disappear (two birds).
 

brokenupinside

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Leisure Suit Larry said:
This is the story I am getting from my BPD girlfriend. I have no way to verify any of the story is true. I know she is dying to move away from her neighborhood so this could be all fiction from her mouth.

My girl lives in her grandmothers house. Her grandmother passed away and did not leave her the house supposedly. She said her greedy uncle got the house and is going to kick her out and she will have nowhere to go and will be homeless and she can't stay with her family.

I have my own house and I live alone. She has already asked me to move in. I told her it's impossible because I am going to rent my house out because I can't afford it and I am 3 months behind on the mortgage. Then I screwed up. I told her if I could stay in the house I would tell her to move. I said this fully expecting to be renting my house next month. I didn't really mean it, I was just telling her what she wanted to hear.

Well, thanks to Obama's Homeowners act, my mortgage company redid my loan and reduced the payments a HUGE amount and forgave my late payments, so I am staying there now. I told her this (not like I could hide it), and now she is playing a stupid game with me.

She is acting really distant and I know what she is doing. She is hoping I miss her and tell her to come live with me.

When this doesn't work, I know what is going to happen. She is going to come with a sob story that she is getting booted out and if I really loved her I would let her move in.

How am I going to handle this? There is no way I can let her move in.


Hey Leisure suit Larry,first: I'm going to tell you that it's funny 'cause my BPD's favourite game was LSL....funny uh?
Second:I stayed out of your previous BPD threads cause you seemed like had everything under control(I have 20/15 yrs experience on the matter)
Third:Use the power that you bragged about and walk away NOW!.
:crazy: :crackup: :up:
 
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I'm going to tell her the truth like Mex said.

This is all on her. If she wasn't a shady b!tch who ruined my trust in the beginning, I would consider taking our relationship to the next level.

She messed it all up. Does she even realize it?
 

romangod

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Leisure Suit Larry said:
I'm going to tell her the truth like Mex said.

This is all on her. If she wasn't a shady b!tch who ruined my trust in the beginning, I would consider taking our relationship to the next level.

She messed it all up. Does she even realize it?
That's a tough question, Larry. Your expertise on BPD women may be driving her towards you. She has to have you and is doing everything in her power to make it happen. You've mastered her and it's torturing her. Little does she know that you've always been onto her game and she's fooling with the king of BPD women. She doesn't know what's hit her.

Cheers!
 
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I made a video response on youtube.

My account name is 007TheAsianLover


Grow some balls!!!
Episode 3
 
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Warrior74

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your a god damn idiot. You know this girl ain't shlt and you still complaining about her? She should a random pump and dump....I never understand why you guys toy around with crazy bltches. When I find out a chic is crazy I get the hell away from her. Are yall that desperate? What's the deal?
 
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Well we went out tonight and I told her the truth. That our trust was broken early by her shady behavior and I am not ready.

She said

you sound like another guy I used to date who said he wasn't ready and then cheated on me. besides, I acted shady like that because I knew you were talking to other girls on the computer
That was it, and it's all still up in the air. I took her out to a nice place to eat tonight. We were about to get back to my place and her girlfriend called and needed her to drive an HOUR to pick her up because she was drinking.

I nodded my head NO but my girl said OK and started to turn around. I said HELL NO and made her drop me at my house. I told her to have a nice night don't bring your girl back here. She wanted to bring her ugly ass fat girlfriend back here.

She really thought I would drive an hour to hang out with her and her girl who is "going through a hard time right now".

The BPD called me mean because I was upset the plan changed. We were supposed to hang out together alone tonight.

I have a feeling she planned this all along. The drama continues....
 

Warrior74

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Leisure Suit Larry said:
Well we went out tonight and I told her the truth. That our trust was broken early by her shady behavior and I am not ready.

She said



That was it, and it's all still up in the air. I took her out to a nice place to eat tonight. We were about to get back to my place and her girlfriend called and needed her to drive an HOUR to pick her up because she was drinking.

I nodded my head NO but my girl said OK and started to turn around. I said HELL NO and made her drop me at my house. I told her to have a nice night don't bring your girl back here. She wanted to bring her ugly ass fat girlfriend back here.

She really thought I would drive an hour to hang out with her and her girl who is "going through a hard time right now".

The BPD called me mean because I was upset the plan changed. We were supposed to hang out together alone tonight.

I have a feeling she planned this all along. The drama continues....
it continues because you let it. idiot. Move on and met some more women.
 

jophil28

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Leisure Suit Larry said:
...she was banging other guys. I forgave that because we were not exclusive.

....Then we broke up for a month, and she ran off with another guy while stringing me along like a chump.

.... I don't trust her and I can't trust her because of HER actions.
What are you thinking referring to this slvt as your "girlfriend "?

You need to set some standards for yourself URGENTLY and quit allowing the pull of that pvssy magnet to override your rational thoughts.
Unless you do, you WILL agree to her demand to cohabitate in a weakened moment, Before long she will be staying out late "with her girls", eating pizza every night on your couch, and telling you how "controlling" you are when you ask her to rinse her dishes and stop drinking all your booze..
Then you will slowly become aware of the reasons why her past is a trainwreck as you become the newest leading man in the latest remake of her life movie.
 
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I agree with you both... I gotta get rid of her...

We were supposed to chill together tonight and she changed the plans just because her girl called.

I am P!SSED! She wanted me to drive with her an hour and hang with her fat ugly girlfriend the whole night?

This could be it... I need to stay pissed and dump her over this.
 

jophil28

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Leisure Suit Larry said:
I am P!SSED! She wanted me to drive with her an hour and hang with her fat ugly girlfriend the whole night?

This could be it... I need to stay pissed and dump her over this.
"This could be it .." ? That sounds wishy washy .

She is placing her girl as her priority over you. What would she have to do further to disrespect you and to convert your prevarication into action ?

Yes, you do need to dump her. The question is, will you follow through and do it? Probably not. Why do I say that ? Because you have not accumulated the wisdom, the discernment and the self protection that should eventually follow only ONE experience with a BPD woman in your life.

BPD women are like a tumor- just one should be enough to motivate you to change your life.
 
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jophil28 said:
"This could be it .." ? That sounds wishy washy .

She is placing her girl as her priority over you. What would she have to do further to disrespect you and to convert your prevarication into action ?

Yes, you do need to dump her. The question is, will you follow through and do it? Probably not. Why do I say that ? Because you have not accumulated the wisdom, the discernment and the self protection that should eventually follow only ONE experience with a BPD woman in your life.

BPD women are like a tumor- just one should be enough to motivate you to change your life.

I am going to try and get rid of her over this. Should I point out to her that she put her girl over me and it was disrespect?

How should I go about dumping her over this? We have gotten pretty close, so I have to be tactful about the dump.

I think her mindframe is "f-ck him. he wont let me live there or marry him, so he is low priority"
 
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muscleman said:
I think it's obvious you're not ready to dump when you say "you'll try" and then ask how to do it.

Hint: "I'm breaking up with you" usually works.

I used that exact line last time, and then she said "you really don't want to be with me any more?"

And I cracked and ended back with her.
 

brokenupinside

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Everybody warned you about this,you thought you were immune but I can see she's got you ensnared already,walk away now before it's too late.
There must be 50 ways to leave your lover.
 
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