So Many Ways progress report: Getting back in the game

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
For the last 8 months, I've had a horrible work schedule which has kept me from having any semblance of a social life. I've had to work every Friday evening, Sat evening and Sunday evening. Well recently I had a schedule change so I've been making an effort in putting together some semblance of a social life and to meet some women. I've written field reports for the last 3 or 4 weeks so I figured I might as well post them.
 

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
Some hesitation but one street approach

Sat Oct 15 2005

*names have been changed to protect the innocent*

I was supposed to go clubbing this evening but plans fell through, everyone lagged. I didn’t want to sit at home on a Sat evening so I called up my boy Jamal who stays in Long Beach. I head down to his bad and we go to another friend’s house to watch a fight. I don’t remember who fought but afterwards, Jamal, his friend Diego, and I headed to a bar on the peninsula off of Pine and Ocean.

It was a reggae bar with a predominantly Asian clientele. Everyone was just in their own little groups, I saw very little socializing going on. I sense no vibes from the women at all. We end up leaving that bar and we head to Alegria’s on Pine street. Diego knows the owner who hooks us up with a table. On the table on my right, I see a sista giving me some eye contact. I did nothing. Great. I guess you can say that 8 months of no socializing has left me tentative. I didn’t approach one woman in the bar.

The one approach I made was a street approach. We were walking back to the car and I see 3 females walking past. 2 of them were fat but one was at least decent. I motion to her to come over and we start talking. I don’t remember specifics other than a whole lot of C&F going back and forth. She then said something to Jamal to the effect of “you only date white girls huh” in a harsh accusatory tone. When she said that I lost all interest and ejected.
 

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
Got a makeout session, should've closed

Fri Oct 21, 2005

*names have been changed to protect the innocent*

Me and my main wing Dan head down to a local club called Sutras. The last time we went there was over 8 months ago and back then, it was wall to wall honeys. We get there and there’s no line, weird. We get in and get a drink and we start chatting with some dude about where the Orange County hot spots are. To the left we see a bachelerette party. I made some comment about the chick that had a bunch of mints glued to her shirt. Nothing really happened there.

The next group I approached was 2 Asian chicks. My wing was the one who wanted to approach them but he was nervous. I told him that I would open them but he had to come in and talk. I did that, I opened them with a “hey what’s up” and kick the convo. I introduce my wing and I prop him. I tell the girls that he’s the man, etc. The next thing they hit us with is “what do you do”. Normally I would have given some sort of Deangelo type line but I was just off, I said err I work with computers. This set didn’t go anywhere, it seemed as if they were digging for gold, f*ck it.

The next girl I approached was this redbone sista I saw standing by herself. I saw her out of the corner of my eye and I decided to open her. She wasn’t really my type, she was taller and thicker than what I normally go for but I need the practice. We engage in fluff talk and then her friends start coming around. I introduce myself to her friends. We must have talked for a good 20 minutes are so I figured I’d number closed. She was responded with a rude “I don’t call myself” type comment wtf I don’t know what her problem was. No biggie.

We decide to leave Sutras and we head to Pierce Street. We get in and I get myself a beer. My wing decides to make a beeline straight for the dancefloor. I personally detest doing that walking through the dance floor routine so I post up on the side. The next thing I know he walks off the dance floor with 2 women in tow, damn, Dan is the man. I start talking to one of the girls, I compliment her on the top she was wearing that was revealing cleavage. We go on the dance floor and before long, we’re grinding on each other. I then get aggressively AMOG’ed by some dude who just cuts in. I chose not to make a scene and I decide to find another chick as I was horny after my grinding session.

I see a chick walking by out of the corner of my eye. She was average looking but I didn’t care at this point. I give her real intense eye contact, signal her over and I take her on the dance floor. Before long, we’re macking down with a full make out session going on on the dance floor. She reached her down and she grabbed, well never mind. We go at it for a while until she needs to use the restroom. Unfortuantely I lost her and didn’t see her at the end of the night.

In between then and the end of the night, the same AMOG that aggressively ****blocked me tried to get belligerent with my wing. The busty girl that I dance with earlier ran up to me and told me that the guy was trying to start trouble so I went up to him and told him to chill the **** out. He had no choice but to back down.

Anyway, I see the girl I was macking down with at the end of the night. I attempt a number close and she said “I have 4 kids”. Looking back, I should have taken her to my car and handled business.
 

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
Short approach at Irvine Improv

Fri Oct 28, 2005

*names have been changed to protect the innocent*

This is pretty short, just an approach while waiting in line to see John Witherspoon (pops from Friday/Wayans brothers). My roommate Alan and I started talking to 2 women in front of us in line. Both these broads were absolutely smoking. Alan says something in my ear: “ask them to go get a drink at Yardhouse right there”. I did as instructed, they were flattered but they told me that they were waiting in line for their dates. Hey I’m glad I asked, I’d be a fool not to.
 

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
Long Beach is where it's at

Sat Oct 29, 2005

*names have been changed to protect the innocent*

Saturday night, my wing “Dan” and I head out to Long Beach. We arrive at Pine Street early so we decide to get some Mexican food. My boy was in rare form, flirting with the hostess dressed like catwoman and the waitress dressed like wonder woman. After we finished eating, we walk down to a bar called Mariposas.

They were playing salsa music but it was dead, hardly any woman to talk to there, so we head to Alegria. Alegria was the same way, not that many woman. We didn’t stay there so we walk down Pine and end up at a club called Hush.

We get in the club and my wing immediately heads towards 2 females he sees dancing. Now one of the women is maybe a 5 at best and the other one is a 3. I did join but I just wasn’t really feeling it, my heart wasn’t in it. I grab myself a brew, then I sit down on the far end of the dance floor. As I’m sitting down, around 4 females join me and one of them sit right down on top of me. Now they weren’t that fine but I didn’t mind, I wasn’t going to push her off of me. Anyway the girl that was sitting on my lap gets up and gives the girl sitting down next to me a lapdance. Then she proceeds to give me a lapdance. I didn’t mind.

After a while they leave and I left to survey the room. I look to my right and I see to sistas dancing, I approach them, no play. F*ck it. I’m still at the side of the dance floor posted up when this attractive woman in a group started rambling to me about something. I start talking to her but she’s all over the place, I think she was on a fast one. No mind. I see one of her friends, who’s dressed like Elvira eyeing my wing hard so I tell my wing to dance with her. He eagerly begins dancing with her and they’re grinding right away. Cool!

Anyway I spot another oen of her friends dancing by herself. She’s pretty, my style. I make my way over there but I’m blocked by some dude who was also trying to get at the same set of 4 women. I get over there anyway and I start talking to her. The convo was something like this.

Me: hey what’s up
HB: Hey
Me: Is that guy over there your bodyguard
HB: Haha no
Me: Did he come with yall
HB: No

We introduce ourselves and we dance for a while. After a few songs, they start playing some Miami bootyshake. I don’t like that music, apparently she doesn’t either as I saw her turn her nose so I grab her hands and say “let’s get some fresh air”. Anyway we go outside and talk some more and she tells me she’s married! WTF…

Anyway I decide to keep talking to her. Funny thing is, I end up # closing her. After I got her digits, she gave me this look, you know that look, damn if she wasn’t married… I figure that we can hang out again and I can use her as chick bait, at least.

We leave the club where we run into some broads on the street. They ask us to lift up our shirts..wtf. I oblige of course, we talk for a minute. They claim they had a room at the hotel room, turns out they didn’t.
 

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
Disaster

Fri Nov 4, 2005

*names have been changed to protect the innocent*

What a fu*ckin disaster tonight was.

My main wing and I were kickin it at the pad watching dvd’s. My wing Dan gets a call from the girl he hooked up with last week at Pierce Street. Her and her younger sister, who were there that night at the bar want to hang out. They live in Huntington Beach so we drive down to their pad.

We decide to go down to main st in Huntington Beach since it’s close. Anytime I would suggest something like “hey let’s go over here” they would whine or complain. Anyway we ended up at this bar called Fred’s. I got a drink and got into gear, telling funny stories and making the girls laugh. Things were cool, so I thought.

The girls wanted to go dancing and started complaining so we left the bar and walk across the street to another bar where there was dancing. We got in and the girls made a beeline for the dance floor. I just sat off to the side because I had no desire to dance at all. My wing was out there dancing with them and even a couple of other girls. I wasn’t getting any buying signals from other girls so I just played it cool. And one point it got really crowded so I made my way to another part of the bar where it was less crowded. The next thing I know I’m being escorted out by security, wtf.

I was pretty upset. I had a whopping 3 drinks the whole night and I got no explanation as to why I was getting kicked out. I closed out my tab got rounded everyone up and left. This is when I lost it and started yelling out loud “f*** this place” as I was walking outside. The girls got scared and left. In retrospect I should have kept my anger to myself.

A perfect ending to a wonderful evening.
 

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
Tough night

Sat Nov 5, 2005

*names have been changed to protect the innocent*

Ahh, another difficult night.

Yesterday, we made reservations to eat at a restaurant called Mosun in Laguna Beach. At night it turns into a club. The girls from the night before were supposed to go with us but they now want nothing to do with me after my outburst the night before.

Anyway it’s me, my main wing Dan and my roommate Alan rolling out there. My roommate is player and has been with over a 100 chicks at least. We get there, eat and we head upstairs to the club after we get our passes.

The theme of this night was no play. The first girls I opened were two girls sitting next to me. One of them mentioned it was their birthday so I said “happy birthday, did you get a cake”, something like that. They said “cake is fattening” so I said “what about a happy birthday celery stick, you can put a candle on it”. They laughed…the conversation died, they just had no interest in talking.

There was a group of girls on our left that my player roommate opened and I joined in. I ejected as I couldn’t think of anything to talk about. I guess I should’ve persisted but I was getting nothing from them.

My roommate Alan got some headway with this one Latin female and they were grinding on the dance floor. I don't know if he got her number or not. He said he hit it off with the girls sitting next to us but he said that she lived in San Diego. He was the only one of us that got anywhere that night.

My wing wasn’t having any luck either as he was getting blown out by every set he approached. I approached a few other girls on the dance floor but got blown out every time. This particular incident sums up the evening. I spot this girl dancing by herself. I get some eye contact and go in. As soon as I go up to her, she leaves with the quickness. All I could do is laugh.

I think I’m going to stick to LA or Long Beach spots, despite the long drive. I’m not getting much love in Orange County at all.
 

Gipper

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 9, 2001
Messages
889
Reaction score
2
Age
58
Location
Tennessee
So Many Ways,

You know, I really admire you and your efforts posting here. It gets discouraging reading about everyone talking to their ex, asking if they should try to get her back, etc.

Well done. I'm just sorry no one else has congratulated you for trying so hard. Don't give up, man, you are inspiring me!

Gipper
 

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
Originally posted by Gipper
So Many Ways,

You know, I really admire you and your efforts posting here. It gets discouraging reading about everyone talking to their ex, asking if they should try to get her back, etc.

Well done. I'm just sorry no one else has congratulated you for trying so hard. Don't give up, man, you are inspiring me!

Gipper
Thanks bro. I was inspired by the Shezzler and Self Mastery 300 approach thread in the main board. I don't want to get into the trap of just typing theory without going out in the field.
 

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
thursday update

Thurs Nov 10, 2005

I went out during the day to run some errands and hopefully accomplish a daytime cold approach. I haven't done a daytime cold approach in seemingly forever. Almost everything I do is at night.

I first head out to target with my roommate. You can never run out of toothpaste, deodorant, toothbrushes, etc. There weren't too many women out today but the checkout girl was kinda cute. I was going to flirt with her but I kinda chickened out. I did feel that "sexual state" that I read about in the Gunwitch post and I gave her intense eye contact as I checked out. Next time that happens I need to speak.

We head over to the mall as I needed some cologne. Hugo Boss cologne is the sh!t, I recommend it, I got myself a bottle. Anyway I spray some on my wrist and I go up to one of the ladies working there and I say "what do you think of this". She proceeds to sell me on stuff, but again, I had trouble coming up with any flirtatious moves or anything like that.

I walked around and I saw a few cuties walking by, but again chickened out. I don't know why I find it easier to do nighttime stuff but have so much trouble when the sun's out. This is something I need to deal with.
 

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
Old Town Pasadena

Fri Nov 11, 2005

My main wing Dan and I decide to make a trip up to Old Town Pasadena at the spur of the moment. Our intent is to bar hop and talk to some women. As we arrive, I notice there are tons of people out, plenty of young ladies. I can already tell tonight was going to be fun and I was decked out, wearing some flyass ****.

We park in a structure and we hit up this restaurant/bar right next to it. I've been there before a couple of years back, I took a disatrous match.com date there. We walk in and we step to the bar cuz it's a bad habit and I order myself my first drink of the night. Right off the bat, I see a woman sitting down to my left that was giving me some eye contact. I said "hey" but I was tongue tied, couldn't kick the convo. I get my drink and Dan and I post up in the corner.

Dan sees a table of 3 HB's sitting about 30 feet away right in the middle of the eating area, one white bruneete and 2 asian girls. We start discussing a game plan when a married couple join us in the conversation. They encouraged us to go for it so I said f' it, grabbed my nuts and walked to the table. I opened up with the "hey my friend wants to talk to you" and it opened. I was talking to all 3 of them for a minute and I motion my wing to join us. We chat for a while, my wing had his eye on one, a brunette white girl and I had my eye on an Asian cutie with a nice rack. We talked to them for a few minutes then ejected, thinking we'd run into them later. Unfortunately they left early and we didn't get the chance to close them. Looking back we should have just joined them at the table.

We post back up in the spot and me and my wing were just clowning, having a good time. A hot latin babe walks by and my wing is all over it, they're grinding on each other and next thing you know they're on the dance floor. After a while they motion me over and we're both dancing with a group of girls. The other girls were chunky and not my style but I'm just having a good time.

We dance with them for a minute and then post back up at our spot. We both notice this absolutely stunning tall blond HB9 with some dude. I go over to get a drink and she's standing right next to me, I was almost intimidated, almost. I had to mentally remind myself that being intimidated by a woman is foolish, if anything she should be intimidated by me. I think I said a couple of words to her, something about the drink and then I ejected. A few minutes later, we're chatting in some big group of people and the HB9 with the dude in tow join in the conversation. The HB9 wants to dance and my wing was all over it, doing salsa like moves. She danced with him for a minute then motioned towards me. That's when the dude she was with cuts in and handcuffs his ho.

I talked to a couple of other girls, nothing major. There was one I didn't get to, a pretty, tall, athletic black female, an HB8-9 range. she was giving me eye contact all night but she was with a guy the whole time. She was never by herself and I couldn't find an angle to approach.

Anyway we didn't get a chance to check out other spots as we had fun where we were at. Again, spots in LA county are so much easier to deal with than spots in Orange County, women are much easier to talk to up there. I think every girl I talked to at least opened. One thing I need to work on is closing, I'm having problems closing the deal or it gets awkward when that time arrives. That's the biggest issue with my game right now.
 

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
Daytime flirting and nighttime socializing

Sat Nov 12 '05

My wing Dan and I decide to head to the mall. We head out to the Cerritos mall. Last time I was there there were plenty of good looking women, plus I wanted to do some shopping as well. Anyway there were very few women there so I decide to flirt with the women working there.

We walk into a store, I don't remember which at this point. I see one fo the sales clerks and she has a guilty look on her face, so I had to comment.

SMW: You look like you got your hand caught in a cookie jar.
HB: blah blah

We talk for a few minutes, nothing major, just being social. I didn't attempt to close. My wing gets in on the act and flirts with women at another store. He told a woman she looked "fabulous" and she lit up like a Christmas tree.

That was pretty much it, nothing else to report there. I know that I need to just say f*ck it and do a real daytime approach, but I know that I need to become more social and friendly, without having to rely on having a drink in my hand. It's all a work in progress.

Later on in the evening, we head over to Long Beach. It was my main wing "Dan" and an older friend of mine, "James". I wanted to head to a couple of different spots but my friends were short on funds so we head to a club called Mariposas, which had a cheaper cover. Unfortunately most of the women were fat and there were very few favorable targets, plus I was weary, it had been a long week and my energy was low.

The only set of note was when I was backing up my wing, who approached a female sitting down and pulled her out on the dance floor. I engaged her friend, she was cute but too chunky for my taste. I talked to her anyway. I don't remember the conversation, but I busted on her a little. She told me she has no flaws so I decided to nickname her "lil miss perfect", just to mess with her. Nothing else significant to report. I got the nickname idea from one of the DYD interview series with TD, where he suggests nicknaming women. I'll have to explore this further. I definitely see the potential, especially when approaching groups and you can't remember their names. That's always been a problem for me.

Anyway, this was a slow night but I'm not about to stop now. This is just the beginning.
 

Gipper

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 9, 2001
Messages
889
Reaction score
2
Age
58
Location
Tennessee
Nice. This thread should be kept near the top to keep all these "what should I do about my ex" posts at the bottom.

D@mmit, this is why we are HERE, men! Read and follow this example.

Gipper
 

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
Originally posted by Gipper
Nice. This thread should be kept near the top to keep all these "what should I do about my ex" posts at the bottom.

D@mmit, this is why we are HERE, men! Read and follow this example.

Gipper
Thanks for the response. I'd appreciate any feedback anyone has to offer as I take this to the next level. I plan on doing some daytime approaches. It's one step at a time for now.
 

Gipper

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 9, 2001
Messages
889
Reaction score
2
Age
58
Location
Tennessee
SoManyWays,

I'd like to give you some feedback, but you're already eclipsing my efforts. I need to catch up to you!

If I had to give an answer though, I would recommend some number closes and then proceed to date several chicks at the same time. Three was all I could ever manage, but I plan to surpass that ASAP.

Keep up the good work!

Gipper
 

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
Out of town mackin, too much alkahal

Fri Nov 25, 2005

This past weekend, I went to the bay area after Thanksgiving with some of my boys to do some sightseeing, wine tasting and of course partying. A long road trip is good for the soul.

We stayed with my roommate's brother, who lives in Santa Rosa. After a day of sightseeing in San Francisco we opt for partying locally in Santa Rosa instead of partying in San Francisco and trying to drive back. Anyway, we hit up a local restaurant which turns into a club at night.

As we wait in line, my wing goes and snatches up some broads and brings them in line with us. They were hispanic and spoke Spanish, so I said some stuff to them in Spanish but my Spanish sucks, I was just messing around. We go into the club with these broads and they disappear.

Like a routine, we step to the bar cuz it's a bad habit like always. One of the dudes in front of me in line offers to buy drinks for everyone so I take him up on it. I get the drink and to my right I see a blonde smiling at me. I engage her in some convo and I did the unthinkable, I *GASP* offered to buy her a drink!!! I get her a vodka tonic and the dude for the line paid for it. I got her a drink with someone else's money, cool.

We talk for a while, just regular bs'ing, she intros me to her crew. She complains about the music, so I take her on the dance floor, where we grind it out. I don't remember what happened next, whether she left or I left as the alkahol was really taking effect at this point. At this point I'm thinking easy come easy go and search for other targets.

Things get cloudy at this moment as I somehow end up on the dance floor with a fattie engaged in a full makeout session. Somehow we got separated. I vaguely remember trying to talk to another girl but I overdid Kino and she got turned off. Nothing like mackin' while drunk, good times.
 

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
Clubbing in San Francisco, freak shows everywhere

Sat Nov 26 2005

*Mental Note: If I'm ever in San Francisco again and go clubbing there, do my homework.

Early in the day, the crew and I did some wine tasting in Sonoma County. This is something I recommend for anyone to do, it's a blast, Just make sure you have a limo or a designated driver.

After a day of wine tasting, we head out late to San Francisco to hit up a club. I called a couple of peeps who have partied in San Francisco and I got the name of a couple of spots, Ruby Sky and MInna St. I couldn't get an address or directions to Minna St so we head to Ruby Sky, since my wing's friend recommended it and gave us specific directions. We head out late, around 11:30pm and get to the club around an hour later.

We get in, check in our coates and look at the surroundings, this is definitely a full fledged club, no doubt about it. There was great music but it was difficult finding approachable women. Also there was another problem.

Some of the women weren't actually women so you had to be careful. There were 2 cute black girls I saw on the upstairs of the club. I said hi to them and waived but for some reason I hesitated. I still get approach anxiety after all this time. The second girl I talked to was by one of the bars. We started chatting and we were both Kino'ing each other than she took off to the dance floor somewhere. I don't know where she went, it was kind of random.

That's pretty much it for this club. Always do your homework.
 

JoeBlack

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 29, 2004
Messages
179
Reaction score
0
Age
45
I'd also like to say good job for getting out there and making some approaches.

You are in front of me, I am still at the stage of trying to work out best approaches and actually getting some balls to do it. I have been better the last 2 weeks, but I truly can see you have that part nailed and its just working out the details for you. You have inspired me to start approaching more and learning more about this stuff.

One tip.

You always say looking back..... Why not when you are talking with people ask yourself the question... What I am holding back from doing and just say **** it and do it.

Rather than leave the girls at the table and hope you might see them again, beforte you leave (which by the way I think is a good idea it leaves them with the feeling you can't spend your entire evening with them you got some other business to take care of) you could have said 'look, I gotta go, a few more people to catch up.. You with the funny dress.. (or something else funny), why don't you give me your number and we'll catch up?

What do you have to lose? Easier said than done I guess.. But if you had the balls to start talking to them from cold, you got the balls to do that ;)

I also noticed your working with computers line. Yeah, that sounds boring.

Heres one I use. I normally say... 'oh, I am a pooper scooper'..

Now, stay with me on this lol...

They are normally like wtf, you pick up poop?

I am like **** no... I got one of those trucks that picks it up, and I manage a group of pooper scoopers. This is big league baby... lol..

It always gets a laugh. Sometimes I won't even reveal my main job after that and joke and say I am for real!!!

Sometimes I'll just say, hah I am just ****ing wit ya, I work for a games company (which I do).. I don;t even tell them my position.. Itas a big position and I could impress, but you know girls generally are not impressed with it, and for the most part staying a touch secretive works better than saying 'oh, I do job x and I earn a ton'...

Anyway, not sure I am even the right guy to give you advice, good job.

Hey you have a messenger so we can chat?
 

So Many Ways

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
791
Reaction score
2
Location
www.blackmenvent.com
JoeBlack, thanks for the feedback. You're right, if I can go and approach a whole group, then I should be able to close, it only makes sense.

This week has been slow, tons of work, I'm at work right now as I type this. I shot some pool Thursday. I flirted with some waitresses, nothing more. I hit up a club last night but there were maybe 2 or 3 times more guys than girls. Nothing really to report.
 
Top