Single mom: where can I meet professional, educated, financially stable men?

[Zarky]

They don't need one. Its perfectly acceptable for them to openly talk about it in the workplace, or in general.

That's great, but why do we have to analyze it as if it's some important proclamation from on-high?

Women b*tch constantly about everything, men included. So what? Why do their rantings deserve threads and analysis here?

 

[MikeOck]

we're saying the same thing. this particular woman needs to get real lol. like i said, i undresetand slighting the woman simply beucase she has stupid expectations. i'm with you there

but, let's say this woman had an accounting degree and had a job making 60k a year somewhere doing some ****. guys would still slight her just now because she is 30 and has a kid,even though the kid came in a marriage.


like i said, i probably would not date her, but that doesn't mean she should be shamed.

Having a kid, or in this case multiple kids, greatly reduces her relationship value. This isn't a slight, it is a simple fact. Kids take a lot of time, work and money, as a dad you should understand this. Each kid is like coming into the relationship with a $250,000 debt (the current estimate of what it costs to raise a kid to 18 in the US). Unlike a mortgage, children not only require cash but also constant supervision and work.

Combine that with the fact that the men she desires are the same men that all relationship minded women desire and you can see her problem. These guys have options. Option one: a 30+ woman with massive debt and responsibility or a single woman (or women) in their 20's with no kids, no debt, little responsibility. It's like trying to sell a used Honda Civic for $500,000 when the Ferrari dealership next door is giving away exotic super cars for free.

 

[MOTU]

while i agree with this, this was my point in my original post in this thread. you can't have it both ways.

had this woman gotten a degree, went t colleg
eand put off dating to focus on getting a degree, the men here would **** that decision as well.

I am with you on this. There is a lot we don't know about this woman.

My main plate right now is a late thirties single mom with two elementary age kids. She has a masters degree, a good job as an office manager at a large utility and seems pretty self sufficient. She never asks for help doing anything, including unloading furniture. She mows her own yard.

At this point, I am her getaway. She comes over or we go out, we laugh, we do fun sh!t (she bought me a sailing lesson), we fvck, she goes home. I haven't ever met her kids after 2 months of dating.

She could have written that exact post, looking for someone like me: mature, stable, fun and a good fvck, and most of what you all wrote wouldn't be true. Now, I understand that she is probably the exception, and that the "average" woman in her situation is looking for a lifestyle change more than romance. But let's also be sure that we don't get so jaded that we miss a good opportunity.

Side note: I know, and I assume she knows, that a real LTR between us is unlikely. My youngest moves out to college in 4 weeks. We are in very different places in our lives. I don't bring it up, she doesn't bring it up. But eventually my guess is she'll want more than I want to give and things will end. But in the meantime, it's a great situation for me.

Wow writing that was kind of cathartic.

 

[backbreaker]

^^^^

One of my fav tv shows is the wire (serious spoilers ahead) One of the reasons that I really like the show is beucase of the message that they get across throughout the entire show. It's the only "great show" that has a real message.

In season 3, the bald head black cop that's about to retire, whoose name escapes me right now, I think Calvin or smoething like that, says you know what.. i'm going to change the landscape of the drug war. I see that we are giving all our resources to the drug war, its not working, and actual crime, other crime is not getting any better. I have cops that dont' know how to do real cop work they just rip and knock in doors and **** and it's a lose lose for everyone. The corner boys are right back on the corner the next day.


so hey, this is what i can do.. how about i let these people do what they are going to do anyway, but restrict it to a certain area of the city, and as long as they stay there, they will not be prosecuted, so that they can leave everyone else in the city alone.


He meets resistance at first, but the plan eventually works beautifully. Crime drops like 15% overall, there are virtually no murders in his area anymore, the kids can actually play in their yards again without worrying about getting shot, everyone is happy, but he hasn't told any of the higher ups how he has done all this (legalizing drugs in a certain area of the city), hamsteram is what its' called.

Anyway, the cops, who are used to ripping and running are bored and agigtated that they aren't doing thi anymore, they tip off the newspaper, the newspaper tips off the higher ups, everything is blown to hell.


The mayor finds ou what happened, and being one of the only sane people thee, realizes that he can keep crime down and he can ride the white horse and be in front of this issue if he can figure out a way to call it what it isn't.. legalized drug use. he's toying with the idea of keeping it there, but his cheif of police is so scared for his job, because he didn't know what was gonig on, and he thinks the delay in getting around to closing it, is trying to frame it on the cheif of police, that he shuts it down himself.


So the cop who started all this quits the police, goes into the private sector in season 4. He ventually ends up helping these kids at this middle school i this program for **** kids who can't pay attention and by relating to them on a level that they they can understand, he is able to make some headway with him. he basically, takes all the bad kids, out of class, so that the regular kids can actually learn ****, and helps the bad kids learn on a level they can relate to.


Again, works. The regular kids actually start learning ****. The bad kids actually start learning ****. The higher ups, figure out what is going on, they tell the governor that he's "segrating kids from each other" it gets all politiized, evertyhing has to go back to the **** system that it was at the ed of season 4.


At the end of season 4, there is this bad ass kid, **** i can't remember his name the one with the long ass hair, Wee Bay's son. Anyway, he acted out a lot, but the cop dude could see the kid was not stupid and if someone woud actually work wtih him he could do some real sht with his life and not be on te streets. So to make a long story short,, season 5, the cop ude says **** trying to change socitey lol, I'm gonna take this bad ass kid, he's gonna come live with me, and i'm going to raise him like he's my son.


Kid went from selling heroin on the street to being in state wide debates in school and being an honor student, with a little help and guidance.



My point in all that is to say, that's real life. You're not going to ****ing change the world, without going down yourself. But you can change yourself. you can take care of yourself and you can individually help others. That's the whole point of coming here. give a little back here and there. Show same people what you know.


You want to help someone? Get in big brothers big sisters, be a mentor to someone. Give good sound advice to people who need it. Give back. Helpsomeone. But *****ing and trying to take on the system, the system will grind you up nd spit you out.

there's too much riding on the status quo. you think divorce lawyers, evne men, want men to get a better share in divorces? What about child custody lawyers?

it's the same reason you'll never see a real solution to the drug problem, there are too many pepole in this country who put food on the table by locking up "bad drug people", from probation officers, to parole officers, to judges, to people hat work in prisons.


It's the same reason you'll never see peole start to push more senable solutions to student debt. There are too many people in this country who put fod on the table by "teaching". People have to teach all these classes. Administrators, school faculties, bank loan officers, money, money, money.


In a country that really does not make ****, this is our bread and butter; institutionally ****ing over our own citizens. It pays the bills.

 

[zekko]

you cant change the family courts, but you can be wiser about the women you get involved with and how you protect yourself.

Thing is, I don't believe there is any way you can enter a marriage with a 100% certainty that you won't get divorced. I mean when I got married I really thought I had done everything right. I waited until I was well into my 30s, I had dated around, I had spun plates, I screened heavily, the girl I married had NO divorce in her family whatsoever. Still didn't work out. Of course, you can avoid marriage altogether, which might be a smart idea. I hate to see the death of the nuclear family though, I think that's a real loss right there.

Danger is mainly spreading awareness, which I think is a good idea. It's just like the gays did for years, they fought to make society aware that they were being discriminated against or hated, and now not only can they marry, if you say something against homosexuals you can lose your job. If the men's rights movement is going to succeed, we're just in the very beginning stages right now. And the first step is to spread awareness.

 

[backbreaker]

It's one thing to spread awareness.

Spreading awareness about men's rights on a forum where guys are trying to get laid, is the equivalent of a gay guy spreading gay rights pamphlets at a man and woman wedding lol.

It's not that people don't care about gay rights or in this case, men's rights, it's that there is a time and a place for it, and I as well as others strongly believe, a guy tying to figure out how to get a girl he likes to go out with him on a date, is not the time, nor the place.


Then, if you re at the regular guy wedding, ad you say dude leave me a lone, it's like the gay guy saying "oh you must want all gay guys to suffer, you have no idea what's going on out there", it's not that, it's that RIGHT NOW AT THIS VERY MOMENT, I DON'T CARE.


again, i stress the fact that there need to be a separate MRA sub forum on this website. It's a message, that's best observed when the user is ready to absurd it, it's not like veggies where your mom makes you eat them when you don't want to. you will get better, more meaningful thought provoking conversations about the subject, and thus more traction if you didn't have to spend half of threads, doing this here, becuase the only people involved in the thread are the people who wish to be involved in the thread.


You have to accept that, there is a large faction of men who just do not care, they want to come here and want to figure out how to get laid. I believe that advice should be given freely without any other contents involved, without any other agendas attached. guy wants to to figure out how to date a divorcee woman with a kid, tell him, rather you agree with him or not, don't give him the riot act on hypergamy.


I believe this forum strongly oversteps it's boundaries when it tries to dictate to other users who they should and should not date. Rather it be a certain age of women, a woman with a past, big women, small women, women with kids, etc. I have my preferences and there are things i've learned from experience, but telling a guy he is WRONG for wanting to date is out of line

then, if the guy has enough bad experiences with say, single mothers, he can then use that for furture references or wht not or save that when someone specifically asks would they date a single mother.

 

[zekko]

Well, a thread on gay rights would be put in the "Anything Else" forum. I notice guys react to the idea of a Mens Rights forum like it's a punishment or something lol. The problem is that there is a blurring of the lines where pickup advice ends and mens rights begins.

When people talk about swallowing the "red pill" there are elements of both there. A newbie coming here gets told that he has to give up the oneitis because of the way women are these days, and women are the way they are these days because of feminism, and don't buy into the idea of the marriage and the white picket fence because you may end up being raked over the coals in family court. It all kind of runs together.

At some point things can cease to be useful as seduction advice, however, and cross over into strictly mens rights. I wouldn't mind seeing certain topics in a mens rights forum, although hey it's not my site. The only real question I have is would there be enough subject matter or threads to support such a subforum?

 

[backbreaker]

I notice guys react to the idea of a Mens Rights forum like it's a punishment or something lol.

becuase it is. it's like taking a class room full of 6th graders outside for PE or 60 minutes then making them come back inside for a math test afterwards. (why could i never get the cool teacher in school that always let you have PE. I would be the cool pe teacher if i were a teacher. damn near every day we'd be outside doing some ****. I don't know why i randomly thought about this but now that i'm 31, Im' pretty sure m first grade teacher ms. price was a skank lol. she as hot as balls too. everyone liked she just had this skank persona lol.)


it's not that you don't' need math but man talking about women, gaming women is FUN and men's rights is NOT FUN. it doesn't mean it's not IMPORTANT but it's not FUN. gaming women, learning how to game women, is fun. they call it sport fvcking for a reason. Spinning plates is FUN. learning how to spin plates is FUN.

When people talk about swallowing the "red pill" there are elements of both there. A newbie coming here gets told that he has to give up the oneitis because of the way women are these days, and women are the way they are these days because of feminism, and don't buy into the idea of the marriage and the white picket fence because you may end up being raked over the coals in family court. It all kind of runs together.

another thing this site needs is a directory page with keywords and they need a clear definition of what the red pill s and what it isn't. it's not anti marriage, it's not anti LTR, it's not anti women, it's it's simply the process of opening your eyes to realize that the world that you were brought up to believe as far as gender relations, is not so.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

Economics.

People have stuff, people want stuff. Everybody tries to get as much as they can, and give as little as they need.

Nobody EVER gives ANYTHING to ANYBODY because they think they "should." The ONLY time ANYBODY ever gives ANYTHING to ANYBODY is because the think they are getting something BETTER than what they're giving.

If some single, fat mom with 27 kids gets laid, or remarried sixteen times, it's because each and every time the guy THOUGHT he was getting the better part of the deal.

Trying to get a whole world full of men to change their subjective values because they make YOU feel uncomfortable, or angry, or upset that they didn't swallow the red pill is pointless.

You may as well stand in the middle of the supermarket complaining that the prices are too high, or the quality is too low.

Whether they be in the financial world, or in the dating world, the unbreakable laws of economics are there.

Always.

You can run, but you can't hide.

 

[sodbuster]

I was talking to a couple{she's put the move on me before, but 3 kids and a smoker}, she's stripper hot and He's working 2 jobs to pay for her and her kids. They got married, and she's conned him into thinking he can have a kid with her. Her tubes are tied, but she told him she knows 4 women who have gotten pregnant with tubes tied. He's just sucking the whole thing up..... Poor basterd, hope she has a snapper

 

[zekko]

becuase it is. it's like taking a class room full of 6th graders outside for PE or 60 minutes then making them come back inside for a math test afterwards.

No, what I meant was that some people see the idea of making a men's rights forum seperate from the general forum as a punishment. That it would diminish the mens rights topic to do that.

gaming women, learning how to game women, is fun. they call it sport fvcking for a reason. Spinning plates is FUN. learning how to spin plates is FUN..

It should be fun, ideally it's fun. But unfortunately for some guys it's a very uncomfortable and painful process.

another thing this site needs is a directory page with keywords and they need a clear definition of what the red pill s and what it isn't. it's not anti marriage, it's not anti LTR, it's not anti women, it's it's simply the process of opening your eyes to realize that the world that you were brought up to believe as far as gender relations, is not so.

There was a discussion about this awhile back and I was surprised at how varied the definitions of "red pill" were that people had. I would have thought that if there was anything people agreed on around here, it would be that.