cordoncordon said:
Yeah I really agree. I just can't imagine my gf ever accepting a ski trip from her boss, let alone any man. And if she did tell me about it, I would tell her "awwwwwwwwww hell no". Just gives the impression of so much shadiness going on. If your girl was so quick to accept those trips, than imo she is doing you a favor by what she doing to you. No quality there.
Frivolous, what you said was spot on. There are quality women out there. Hot quality women. Don't get me wrong, they will all from time to time say or do something that will make you say "wtf"?? but for the most part, they respect their man and the relationship they are in. I think I am pretty lucky in that respect, to have someone like that. But trust me, I can think of two, no three past relationships I was in where the girl I was with did something similar to what the OP's is doing. Things seem great, everything is moving along nicely, and then BAM, for no reason at all you can see, they just turn away from you. But here is the thing, I've done it as well, to past gf's. We are human, we aren't saints. Sometimes we all say or do things that hurt others. It doesn't make us bad per say. It just goes to show us that we are sometimes at the mercy of our emotions, or our penis.
Exactly.
I think some guys come here or are out there who never experienced it going both ways only them getting **** on.
I was horrible in High school and college. Womanizer, nearly mentally abusive. ****ed up person. I was insecure from being abandon as a child by my father and I had no idea that I didn't trust anyone. and it manifested itself in ego, control, power, manipulation.
I had a three year GF from 17-20 and I cheated on her with 40-50 women over that time, it was almost a new women per week. I had sick game, game I had no idea that I had. I was so insecure that no matter how many women loves me, wanted me, would walk threw a wall for me it wasn't enough. It was never good enough, I thought I could find love threw sex and power.
finally my grandma who raised me came to me at 20 and told me I was an abusive bad man. I was devastated to realize that I was my father son.
and that game, confidence, that ego died, I became a huge ***** AFC overnight. recluse, left the game, women all of it. I would get rejected put in the friends zone. I could only get women much lower then me on the looks scale. I was needy and clingy.
Finally I had One I tis from hell...oh did I think I loved her. I was obsessed 24/7, how can this woman "need" me so much and not be attracted to me. I am good looking? What is it?
it drove me here, thank you! I am so lucky.
But I never really fit in here, even though my life was flipped and I was a huge ***** for a while. I could never figure out why so many dudes here were so jaded. Then I realized so many were never on the other side of the coin.
When I rehabbed here I realized my issues were far deeper then being a nice guy. I wasn't bitter at my One I Tis because she hurt me, I was bitter because I lose my dignity in the process.
I am trying to stay open to life being a learning process.
Think with your brain but use you heart as guide. Emotion breathes life into us. Passion, love, hope, desire, compassion, happiness...the list goes on and on for each individual.
I read Thunder Mavericks posts and he is lost in this situation like this guy is.
BUT....who is to say that woman TM is with won't change, flip the script and become a better person and they end up having something worthwhile. It is really hard for us to give advice because so much of it comes from absolutes. And we all learn in life sacrifices are made. If we all lives by absolutes we wouldn't be human. If we give TM one ounce of enabling or comfort then we are doing a disservice? Is that keeping it real? It is all so subjective.
my logical brain tells me that the OP of this thread needs to tell her to her **** and move on, don't tell her you love her, don't tell her you hate her, just let it go, or pretend to, and leave it open, let her see if it's better with said dude over here.
and my logic brain tells me there is a 98 percent chance the woman comes running back to him soon lonly, empty, and will worship the OP, then the OP will do the same thing...she will leave...
RINSE and REPEAT....
however is that true? Is that full proof? What if she comes back and changes and becomes a better woman the OP deserves? Do you always play the logic hand or allow some subjective decision making enter the equation?
if the Earth is taken over by aliens and we are all enslaved. but not horribly and we are allowed to live lives similiar to what we have now. No matter how logical it may be to accept it as it could be far worse. We all know eventually humanity would fight back and risk making it worse because it is unexceptionable, we have fought since the dawn of Homo-Sapein from Erectus and neanderthalisis, since consciousness was spawned for Freedom. Humans won't stop until we achieve perceived absolute freedom.
The point is, we have innate needs that seem to need to be met. And we seem to go back to things that are bad for us hoping to find what we perceive as good for us. Good or bad, insane or not we do it.
Sorry for HI-Jacking