Sex in a LTR

[Charisma]

Hello,

I would like to have some experience talk here from guys & LTR, if in any way possible.

So, it has been about a year now that me and my gf are together (both 24 yrs old, so not a lot of room for bull****ting). First half year or so, mad amounts of sex, now it is down to three times a week or so. And of course, if it were up to me, this would not be the case. Now if I understand correctly, women and men are pretty damn different when it comes to sex. So ignoring the sex in the office or whatever heat of the moment things, let us talk about normal when you get home from work sex.

Now the reasons for turning down making love are this: Tired from work, dont feel comfortable (at my place the neighbours can hear our every move hehe, so ok), and my friend "is that all you can think about" and this is about it. Ok, I understand I suppose. And yeah, it is not all, but a big part of what I usually think about. I need to make myself sexualy less available somehow, if you have any tips, feel free to share hehe.

The thing is however, I never did any serious LTR, so I am only familiar with those couple of weeks or months where you just go at it like animals and then get tired of them and move on.

So ok, I wonder how your sex life is or was, after one year in a LTR (without cheating on them, gentlemen). Oh and it might be good to know, we live very close together, so pretty much every night we spend together, so while we do not live together, it comes pretty close to it. Oh yes, and I know this is forbidden on these boards but, we love eachother :-D

 

[MacAvoy]

If you truly loved her, you would go out there and get satisfied elsewhere once or twice a week. It would do so many positive things for your relationship. It would get you acting like a true DJ by keeping your game sharp and preventing the AFC tendencies from coming out.

Then you wouldn't come across as a needy AFC begging for her to throw you a bone. You would be much more confident and she would love you for it.

 

[Charisma]

Yah you see, I have to agree with you that its AFC stuff for sure. I do not agree on the cheating part however, thats just ****ed up and sad to hear as a solution but whatever floats your boat. I suppose, the answer is right in front of me, I suppose I have been persueing sex a little too persistent hmm. Anyway, I'd still like to hear about other people who ain't ****ing around with other girls are doing later on when it comes to sex.

 

[insanity]

my ex girlfriend that i went out with for 2 years is a good example of what not to do. we moved in together and the sex was fantastic for 6 or 7 months. at first even when she was sleeping i could put the moves on her and in a dime it would turn into a full scale sex attack. then as time went on i would try for the sneak attack while she was asleep and it began....she would say i'm sleeping GOD!

the more she started resisting my moves the more i wanted her body more. then the only way i could get her to become horny was booze. soon she knew that she could use the power of sex whenever she wanted. whenever we did go for a romp in the hay i would blast off to fast because sex was becoming a rarity and that just made sex unfull-filling and a choir. we fizzled out.

now the girl i've been with the last 5 years is a nympho because i don't claw at her every minute of the day. i do my hobbies or watch my sports and she intiates sex alot of the times. she's also the type who likes to be dominated and wrecked in the sack. last but not least she always will give me a hummer even if she's not up for a romp and that makes her great

 

[Zone20]

Yeah, don't listen to MacAvoy, he's an idiot. The guy's probably never been in a LTR in his life.

 

[Charisma]

I believe I put this in the wrong forum, any chance this could be moved to the mature forum? I think this thread would fit better there somehow after reading the posts in this section

 

[DJinTraining06]

I believe I put this in the wrong forum, any chance this could be moved to the mature forum? I think this thread would fit better there somehow after reading the posts in this section

I'm starting to think my gf is a nympho, if time permits she would wanna do it at least 3 times in a 5 hr period. granted we just started goin out a lil less than a month ago but still. I didnt think girls were this horny. By the third time i soemtimes rather just watch tv lol.

 

[MacAvoy]

I believe I put this in the wrong forum, any chance this could be moved to the mature forum?

Why not go here, its more suited to what your looking for http://www.loveforum.net/

 

[Charisma]

I'm starting to think my gf is a nympho, if time permits she would wanna do it at least 3 times in a 5 hr period. granted we just started goin out a lil less than a month ago but still. I didnt think girls were this horny. By the third time i soemtimes rather just watch tv lol.

Is perfectly normal the first couple of months (imo)

 

[Jariel]

The same thing started to happen in my relationship too. I read somewhere that this is very common. Sexual arousal is mostly mental in females, so when the novelty starts wearing off and you start getting into a routine, it becomes harder for her to find the urge.

For the first 4 months my GF and I were having mad and passionate sex all the time, were all over each other in public and would even get it on in the toilets of a bar, the car, the cinema or anywhere we could get a bit of privacy. Then it eased off and was confined to the bedroom. Then it started becoming a bit of a routine and kinda boring. Then it became less frequent. She held out on me when I was horny or stop before I came, so I would hold out on her when she was horny, just to get my own back. Things were not good and I reached a point where I was going to leave her over it. In a last ditch effort to save our relationship I decided to let her know how I feel.

She admitted she felt the same but didn't want to speak up in case I thought things were fine and she offended me. Once we got it out in the open things started getting interesting. I bought a few sex books, tried different positions and started getting a bit more kinky and adventurous. It brought the spark back for both of us.

I would advise you to do the same. You need to get it in the open. If things are still bad after that or she has a problem, it may be time to move on. Sounds harsh, but whatever you do, NEVER feel bad about expecting good and regular sex from a relationship. It is a very important part of a relationship, and is a big reason why many relationships fail or partners cheat. Without sex you may as well be friends.

 

[jamescr73]

I got out of a 3 year LTR about 5 months ago. The first 6-8 months, we had sex all the time. Sometimes 3-4 times a day. After the first year it dropped to about 3-4 times a week. After the 2nd year it dropped to 1-2 times a week (mostly once though), then between the 2.5 and 3 year mark it went to once every 2 weeks. Heres what ive learned from that experience. First off, remember this line. "The hungry dont get fed." When we first started dating, i was really busy with my job, my hobbies, etc. I didnt have a lot of time for her really, and blew her off alot working on my car, and such. When we were in bed (she stayed at my house alot), sometimes i was tired and i blew her off. The next day she would literally rape me. We had sex all the time, but she always initiated it. So a year goes by, I get laid off from work, and had a lot more spare time. So when i start initiating sex, she starts denying me sex. When we first hooked up, we would fuk anywhere. Bathrooms at parties, pull over during a drive across town and fuk in the back of the car in a neighborhood, my dads basement with him and his girlfriend upstairs, during my moms christmas party in her basement, but then after time went on, it got confined to the bedroom, and it got boring. Also for the first 2 years we really never had a fight. When the sex started to decline, we started to fight alot more, and eventually the relationship fell apart.
So my advice, when the sex frequency starts to fall off, pull back yourself. Dont initiate it anymore. When she trys to make a move on you, hold back. Tell her your tired and not in the mood. Also learn new stuff. Different positions, toys, games, whatever. Spice it up. Doing the same routine every time for a year gets boring. I tell this to my young friends and they cant believe that sex can get boring. Yeah, it can. I met a girl that is a freak in the sack. I freaking love it. Now i can do all the stuff my ex wouldnt ever let me do. I now realize how much she repressed me sexually. Now this new chick, (this is where i really hit the jackpot), is looking at other girls with me, and wants a 3some. :rockon:

 

[Charisma]

hah, nice :-D
Well the two above here posted pretty much exactly the same scenario for my 6 months haha. I was still going out louds on my own then, and never once actualy initiated, was always busy for work and we literaly had to squeeze in three hours every couple of days to be able to meet and that resulted in a lot of rather wild sex, you put it very well, almost like they're raping you haha. So basicaly you keep the game rolling even in the bedroom, gnah, if only it wasn't so damn hard :-D Thank you very much for sharing your past experiences, opens up my perspective quite a bit.