Serous question could mean someones life

[S1NN3R]

not realy BPD, which i dont knwo what it means but mabe like drama queen im guessing>???

It means Bi-Polar Disorder.

 

[Big Eee Zee]

Ok I did this to a chick I knew,so I know it works. This chick and I were waiting to meet a friend,just friends, I wasnt trying anything. She pulls out a pack of cigarettes and starts smoking,I look at here like "wtf" and she says "I know I should quit". I say "quit smoking,think about it,it shortens your life,and you might be meant for something or heck you could be another blonde" she said "Your the only one who has said that to me." She threw the cigarette out and I havent seen her smoke since,well at least not in front of me.
Your scenario is a little different,she said she does it becuase of her boyfriend. Just remind her that all these actions that she is taking are shortening her life. If she smokes and does other negative actions towards her body because of her boyfriend she is an idiot because they clearly arent worth the amount of trouble she puts herself through.

bullsh!t, if you smoke cigs it takes a life altering event to stop.

 

[Bad_Lil'Pixie]

Bury, time to fess up, you really do not want to help her do you??

I reread the 5 pages and the one trend I keep seeing is you wanting her close by. Any advise that could mean you distance yourself you reject, harshly.

You want her as a lover.

You are settling for her NEEDING you and USING you as a friend for now, in hopes that one day she will be LOVING you.

The longer she cuts, the longer she will stay in your life and depend on you and your warm shoulders to cry on.

You love her needing you and you love her turning toward you because you love her, period.

You came here seeking some form of validations for your actions. You know they are shallow and unfulfilling and I think you are looking for a way to get more out of this situation as it stands.

I will even go as far as to say that you may be tempted to worsen her condition to really lock her in your life.

Prove me wrong.

 

[Bad_Lil'Pixie]

oops double post

 

[BuryYourDead]

Bury, time to fess up, you really do not want to help her do you??

I reread the 5 pages and the one trend I keep seeing is you wanting her close by. Any advise that could mean you distance yourself you reject, harshly.

You want her as a lover.

You are settling for her NEEDING you and USING you as a friend for now, in hopes that one day she will be LOVING you.

The longer she cuts, the longer she will stay in your life and depend on you and your warm shoulders to cry on.

You love her needing you and you love her turning toward you because you love her, period.

You came here seeking some form of validations for your actions. You know they are shallow and unfulfilling and I think you are looking for a way to get more out of this situation as it stands.

I will even go as far as to say that you may be tempted to worsen her condition to really lock her in your life.

Prove me wrong.

i have a girlfriend

shes my ex and shes one of my best friends..course i love her i love all of my friends and i would take a bullet for any of them

 

[Nzo]

i dont want to sound like an as*hole if your for real, but was this just a troll post because people have given alot of good advice and nothing seems good enough for you

 

[BuryYourDead]

i dont want to sound like an as*hole if your for real, but was this just a troll post because people have given alot of good advice and nothing seems good enough for you

it is for real.. but all im getting is DITCH HER FOR YOUR OWN GOOD
and
GET PROFFESCIAONL HELP AND MAKE HER HATE YOU

but w/e

 

[The Truth]

it is for real.. but all im getting is DITCH HER FOR YOUR OWN GOOD
and
GET PROFFESCIAONL HELP AND MAKE HER HATE YOU

but w/e

If several people with objective opinions are saying this, doesn't it make sense?

I think Bad Lil Pixie hit the nail on the head! I've done the same thing myself!

 

[Nine Breaker]

BuryYourDead, I am going to assume that you are being completely honest here, and are simply voicing deep concerns for a friend in serious need of help. Plenty of others here have told you not to get involved, that it's none of your business, and they are not exactly wrong for saying so.

You have also heard from others here that this sort of behaviour your friend is showing is little more than attention seeking, and also that in the end, it falls solely upon that individual to seek help if they truly want it at all.

If you sit back and do nothing, then there is always the possibility that she will get worse, and possibly meet an early end. If you try to intervene, then you risk losing her as a friend and hastening her deterioration anyway. It's a fine line anybody walks in such a scenario, and it's not an enviable position to be in.

The best advice I can give you here is to convince her that she should go and see someone for help. The best place for her to start is by going to her local GP (any local doctor you would normally go to when you've got a cold, rash, or explosive diarrhoea!). A General Practicioner is usually a great starting step for anybody who is too anxious about going straight to a psychologist, and is surprisingly adept when it comes to fairly common mental health conditions such as depression. From here, the GP can set your friend on the right track, whether it be treatment, counselling, or further help.

The hardest part for anyone like your friend in getting help is that first step in admitting they need help. This is followed by the equally-hard step of getting off their butt and actually seeing someone who can do something to make things better. Any local Doc can make the first steps much less painful than they have to be.

So, whether you want to convince her to see the GP on her own, or you think you are better off going with her, this is probably the best way in which you can get help for your friend.

But, if she is completely unwilling to even do this in order to help herself, then I strongly urge you to sever all ties with this woman immediately - because then it will truly mean that she has no interest in helping herself in any way - and hanging around her will only prove destructive for all involved.

 

[JonJack]

I strongly believe this issue has been blown way out of proportions. From BuryYourDead's responses to the advice being given, it is obvious he sees the situation as something he is capable of 'fixing' on his own, as long as he gets some 'advice' from people that have similar experiences that does not involve professionals or ignoring her.

Here's the important thing to take note of though. Those of you that have actually experienced a similar situation with a girl that was completely detrimental to herself and potentially suicidal or just plain self-destructive will be fully aware of the seriousness of the situation. These people with first-hand experience will also know that they are incapable of rendering help. Especially when the issue at hand has nothing to do with you but is about other people in her life.

BuryYourDead clearly is facing a situation that isn't serious enough. He has not provided any details as to the seriousness of the girl's self-abuse. It's not like she was holding a blade across her wrists, crying and asking him to save her. That is the reason why he doesn't feel that calling on a professional will do the situation any good. To him, seeking professional help is probably an over-reaction to the whole problem.

However, he still feels that the situation is 'serious' enough to warrant an action on his part. This could be due to the fact that he 'loves' the girl and he wants her to 'see' that. Or maybe he wants to be chivalrous and seem like the type of guy that can save girls from their misery, thus making him look 'good' to everyone else. Or maybe he feels it is his duty to get involved in the personal lives of people because he thinks they're lost and he can show them the way.

This is a sad situation and I'm so disgusted that BuryYourDead can actually still feel he's a good friend to this girl when he is clearly acting in a way that does not take into consideration the girl's opinions of her whole self-destructive actions. Come to think of it, the girl has never actually directly asked for help, neither has she clearly given a sign that she wants to be saved.

This whole situation is a waste of time. I really hope it ends here.

 

[jonwon]

Bury, time to fess up, you really do not want to help her do you??

I reread the 5 pages and the one trend I keep seeing is you wanting her close by. Any advise that could mean you distance yourself you reject, harshly.

You want her as a lover.

You are settling for her NEEDING you and USING you as a friend for now, in hopes that one day she will be LOVING you.

The longer she cuts, the longer she will stay in your life and depend on you and your warm shoulders to cry on.

You love her needing you and you love her turning toward you because you love her, period.

You came here seeking some form of validations for your actions. You know they are shallow and unfulfilling and I think you are looking for a way to get more out of this situation as it stands.

I will even go as far as to say that you may be tempted to worsen her condition to really lock her in your life.

Prove me wrong.

Spot on lil pix.

But it is plain to see this guy only wants to hear what he wants to hear.
Simply put any advice is simply a waste of time.

 

[trance_addict]

I've known a few people invovled in situations that were somewhat similar to this, but after all of that I definitely realized that there is not that much you as one person can do to make this person change. There is a reason why psychologists exist, and some sort of mental and/or behoavioural changes must be made.

So basically, either leave it alone, or get someone who's a professional invovled, whether it be the police or a psychologist.

My two cents.

 

[BuryYourDead]

BuryYourDead, I am going to assume that you are being completely honest here, and are simply voicing deep concerns for a friend in serious need of help. Plenty of others here have told you not to get involved, that it's none of your business, and they are not exactly wrong for saying so.

You have also heard from others here that this sort of behaviour your friend is showing is little more than attention seeking, and also that in the end, it falls solely upon that individual to seek help if they truly want it at all.

If you sit back and do nothing, then there is always the possibility that she will get worse, and possibly meet an early end. If you try to intervene, then you risk losing her as a friend and hastening her deterioration anyway. It's a fine line anybody walks in such a scenario, and it's not an enviable position to be in.

The best advice I can give you here is to convince her that she should go and see someone for help. The best place for her to start is by going to her local GP (any local doctor you would normally go to when you've got a cold, rash, or explosive diarrhoea!). A General Practicioner is usually a great starting step for anybody who is too anxious about going straight to a psychologist, and is surprisingly adept when it comes to fairly common mental health conditions such as depression. From here, the GP can set your friend on the right track, whether it be treatment, counselling, or further help.

The hardest part for anyone like your friend in getting help is that first step in admitting they need help. This is followed by the equally-hard step of getting off their butt and actually seeing someone who can do something to make things better. Any local Doc can make the first steps much less painful than they have to be.

So, whether you want to convince her to see the GP on her own, or you think you are better off going with her, this is probably the best way in which you can get help for your friend.

But, if she is completely unwilling to even do this in order to help herself, then I strongly urge you to sever all ties with this woman immediately - because then it will truly mean that she has no interest in helping herself in any way - and hanging around her will only prove destructive for all involved.

best advice ive gotten from all of this, i will take this and tell the others to go **** themselves

everyone othe rthan nine breaker, i love her as a friend and nothing more.i have a gf already and she has a bf if u read my first post..i would take a bullet for any of my friends i love them all and i am begining to think coming to this site be a bad idea on my part..whp the **** acytalut needs to go on interent for girl help? i shun myyself for this...thank you nine breaker you where veryhelpful