Sarging after a breakup

[Doctormad]

Hey, just wondering, how long after a breakup did you get back on the saddle and start meeting women again? Im asking this because even though its been only a few days since the breakup, I have finally realized the error of my ways and how much freedom I have now. I feel a bit more confident, and once I get the chance I am getting my hair cut, and buying a couple of new shirts. I havent even looked at porn since the breakup, and because of that I feel great. Since I am not looking for another relationship right now, just a ONS or a F-buddy, I wont appear so desperate like I used to. Heck, I am even thinking about doing the bootcamp again.

 

[JC9]

After my last breakup I waited about a week.

Should have started earlier actually. Had oneitis for the girl, which dwindled quickly once I got back out there; so had I started even sooner I would have felt better even sooner.

 

[Vulpine]

I wait until the first morning that I wake up with morning wood. Seriously. Think about it.

 

[MightyMate]

After my breakup i tried to **** a girl the next day. I couldnt tho.. After 3 next days i ****ed next one and started dating. Quit that after week. Then i started meeting new girls each week for sex or dates.. After 2 years i found next woman worth of me for LTR..

 

[AbsoluteFreakinChump]

No thanx!

I don't wanna think about your "Morning Wood"!

Originally posted by Vulpine
I wait until the first morning that I wake up with morning wood. Seriously. Think about it.

 

[Vincent Freeman]

The next morning is fair game. With time, you'll see how much better it feels without having some chic nagging on you as to why you didn't get her this, or take or here, etc. Live it up!

 

[Warlord]

I would wait at least 2-3 weeks before deciding to start dating again. The first week you should be assessing who your friends are, knowing what activities you should get back to, basically resetting your life properties. Then maybe the 2nd week or 3rd week you come out in public and start seeking for a more compatible mate.

Sometimes a more compatible girl will fall right in your lap when you're not even looking.

 

[MightyMate]

Originally posted by Warlord

Sometimes a more compatible girl will fall right in your lap when you're not even looking.

Usually right girls are found while You dont expect em!

 

[[]D [] []V[] []D]

I believe its not a matter of time, but a matter of your psychological thinking. After i broke up, which was about 2 weeks ago... i tried to go the DJ way. I tried to get back out there and not think about the girl and live it up. But it didnt work for me. And sometimes she still comes back into my head, and i think about it.

The REASON why im still not over her is because after i broke-up, i forced myself NOT to be sad, i forced myself not to think aobut her, i forced myself to avoid her, and i forced myself to bury my emotions.

Just remember not to do this. What i would suggest is think about the girl and do all the suffering and thinking in the first week or so. Then youll be over the breakup in like 1 week (or however long it takes you)

Dont make the mistake i did of not thinking aobut those memories because they WILL everntually come back and you'll think back to them.

 

[Bourne]

I believe its not a matter of time, but a matter of your psychological thinking. After i broke up, which was about 2 weeks ago... i tried to go the DJ way. I tried to get back out there and not think about the girl and live it up. But it didnt work for me. And sometimes she still comes back into my head, and i think about it.

The REASON why im still not over her is because after i broke-up, i forced myself NOT to be sad, i forced myself not to think aobut her, i forced myself to avoid her, and i forced myself to bury my emotions.

Just remember not to do this. What i would suggest is think about the girl and do all the suffering and thinking in the first week or so. Then youll be over the breakup in like 1 week (or however long it takes you)

Dont make the mistake i did of not thinking aobut those memories because they WILL everntually come back and you'll think back to them.

Thats very good advice. I broke up with my g/f 1 week ago and tried to move on and forget and forcing myself not to be sad.

It worked for a week until on thursday night, couple of days ago, I completely broke down. It was horrible. So go through pain and hurt, you will recover faster. Don't avoid it. And also through those times, don't call or contact. Its easy to do so.

 

[Doctormad]

Thanks everyone for the advice.

As it turns out, I got sick shortly after I made the post. Not slight cold sick, but stay-at-home-and-vomit-all-day sick. I am glad it happened too, because although I was bored as hell, it forced me to deal with the breakup. Because of that, I feel emotionally free and I dont even miss her at all.

I know this is probably afc of me, but I have since wondered the reason she went back to her ex. I know I will never get an answer, a straight one that is, so I have no choice but to move on. Luckily, I have not seen or heard from her since, and I dont plan on making any effort. As far as I am concerned, she is dead.

As I mentioned in my first post concerning this, I have begun to enjoy being single again. I have been reading books like "how to win friends and influence people" and I have been losing weight again. I even made friends with a couple of girls at work, and next week the three of us are going biking (they are taken and overweight, so they really are just friends). My goal right now is to get a bit of a social life again, and if I meet someone then great.

I will of course keep you all posted on my progress...

 

[Bourne]

Thanks everyone for the advice.

As it turns out, I got sick shortly after I made the post. Not slight cold sick, but stay-at-home-and-vomit-all-day sick. I am glad it happened too, because although I was bored as hell, it forced me to deal with the breakup. Because of that, I feel emotionally free and I dont even miss her at all.

I know this is probably afc of me, but I have since wondered the reason she went back to her ex. I know I will never get an answer, a straight one that is, so I have no choice but to move on. Luckily, I have not seen or heard from her since, and I dont plan on making any effort. As far as I am concerned, she is dead.

As I mentioned in my first post concerning this, I have begun to enjoy being single again. I have been reading books like "how to win friends and influence people" and I have been losing weight again. I even made friends with a couple of girls at work, and next week the three of us are going biking (they are taken and overweight, so they really are just friends). My goal right now is to get a bit of a social life again, and if I meet someone then great.

I will of course keep you all posted on my progress...

Good to hear man. I'm in similar situation, keep us updated.

 

[Luveno]

WTF mates?!

A relationship should not be the prime focus of a man's life. It should be an augmentation, an escape from the banalities of the working world. It should be a vacation. It should have no more influence on your life than the two weeks you spent in the Dominican a few years ago.

When a relationship ends, its akin to pulling money out of a stock before it crashes. It's a good thing.

Get right back into the game. The relationship should never have affected your life to the point where you can't be happy without it. That indicates dependence, and dependence is weakness.

 

[DJDamage]

A relationship should not be the prime focus of a man's life. It should be an augmentation, an escape from the banalities of the working world. It should be a vacation. It should have no more influence on your life than the two weeks you spent in the Dominican a few years ago.

When a relationship ends, its akin to pulling money out of a stock before it crashes. It's a good thing.

Get right back into the game. The relationship should never have affected your life to the point where you can't be happy without it. That indicates dependence, and dependence is weakness.

Well said.