eaglez1177
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 24, 2008
- Messages
- 1,320
- Reaction score
- 21
I can absolutely tell that sage is improving...Igetit your also being a hugee help nice job...keep it going sage and keep on absorbing the advice given
Hello Friend,
If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.
It will be the most efficient use of your time.
And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.
Thank you for visiting and have a great day!
sageproduct's senior year field reports.
- Thread starter sageproduct
- Start date
Holy ****, Igetit! your replies never cease to amaze me. Im kind of like a groupie now, stalking your posts ha. But anyway, good work sage, if I had known a quarter of what you know in highschool, I'd have literally been king of my school. (I was up there popularity-wise, but I had very little game and rode on athletic accomplishments to get me through with the ladies)
sageproduct
Banned
Monday, February 22, 2010
It's been about 24 hours since I've read through Igetit's last post. The lingering AFC/beta/b1tch in me was gripped in fear after reading the "big boobs" suggestion, constantly telling me "you can't say that!", "she'll think you're a creep!", and "what if other people heard you said something like that!"
I'm trying to shift my mentality a little more in the direction of "fwck it". Only thing is, Mel K literally has no boobs so I think I should tweak the sexual comment to something like "I saw a sexy girl with an attitude on tv that reminded me of you"
Paula H
Anyone remember her? I used to post about her waaaaaay back in like october/november. I'd see her around at school every once in a while. I got her number but never did anything besides say "we need to hang out", which, by now, I know is not good enough.
This girl is super-religious but not an in-your-face bible basher and is someone who is individualistic, which I like. Anyway, I haven't seen or talked to her in at least 3 months. A few hours ago I got a text from her so long that it was broken in 2 messages. Just asking me how I've been, saying she hasn't seen me, and saying I should start a team for this dodgeball tournament that she's helping organize or something?
Anyway, I was kinda doing something when I got her text but just ended up forgetting to respond. Which isn't bad at all I guess. I'm gonna call her tomorrow. Screw the dodgeball thing (i don't even really have a social circle anymore), I'll try to see her this weekend. That sure would be something, sexualizing a church girl?
It's been about 24 hours since I've read through Igetit's last post. The lingering AFC/beta/b1tch in me was gripped in fear after reading the "big boobs" suggestion, constantly telling me "you can't say that!", "she'll think you're a creep!", and "what if other people heard you said something like that!"
I'm trying to shift my mentality a little more in the direction of "fwck it". Only thing is, Mel K literally has no boobs so I think I should tweak the sexual comment to something like "I saw a sexy girl with an attitude on tv that reminded me of you"
Paula H
Anyone remember her? I used to post about her waaaaaay back in like october/november. I'd see her around at school every once in a while. I got her number but never did anything besides say "we need to hang out", which, by now, I know is not good enough.
This girl is super-religious but not an in-your-face bible basher and is someone who is individualistic, which I like. Anyway, I haven't seen or talked to her in at least 3 months. A few hours ago I got a text from her so long that it was broken in 2 messages. Just asking me how I've been, saying she hasn't seen me, and saying I should start a team for this dodgeball tournament that she's helping organize or something?
Anyway, I was kinda doing something when I got her text but just ended up forgetting to respond. Which isn't bad at all I guess. I'm gonna call her tomorrow. Screw the dodgeball thing (i don't even really have a social circle anymore), I'll try to see her this weekend. That sure would be something, sexualizing a church girl?
Igetit!
Moderator
"Gripped in fear"? That's a BAD SIGN man. If you're afraid to say something like that to a girl you've already had a date with and have known for over 4 months,then you're already off track.sageproduct said:
If this causes fear,uneasiness,anxiety or worry in you,then you shouldn't say this or any other thing like it to this girl.
The reason why is this: Women are emotional. Now please...PLEASE UNDERSTAND what I mean by this statement.
I DO NOT MEAN THAT THEY CRY EASILY.
I repeat:when I say that women are emotional,I DON'T MEAN that they cry easily.
What I mean is that they're sensitive to emotion. If someone around them is expressing an emotion,they'll pick up on it and start to feel it too,if it's being espressed strongly enough.
So if that "big boob" suggestion I gave causes you to be fearful,then it's better that you don't say it at all.
If you're all nervous and scared,and you're knees are buckling and knocking together because you have that comment in mind about to say it to a girl,then girl will pick up on the emotions of nervousness and fear coming off you,and you'll turn her off.
She'll be turned off to you before you even open your mouth because the fear coming off you will push her away.
You have to be cool,calm,and confident when making comments like that.
The girl follows YOU. So if you're cool,and calm and relaxed,then she'll be cool,calm,and relaxed.
If you're your heart is racing 100 miles per hour,your sweating,and about to wet your pants,your bodylanguage,tone of voice,and overall demeanor will give you away.
Your words and the vibe you give off have to match.
You can't make a sexual comment like I suggested and be all nervous,scared,shaking and twitching at the same time because if you do,you'll come off as being incongruent.
Don't call her all gripped in fear trying to talking to her sexually. That would be creepy. It's better for you to not say anything at all than to say one thing with your mouth,while your emotions and bodylanuage are saying something else to the girl.
Also,I didn't want you to make the boob comment a focal point.
In othe words,you don't want to say it like,"This girl on tv reminded me of you because she had big boobs".
You want to say it as if it was just a passing observation,almost like you said it and didn't even know you said it until she pointed it back out to you.
Something more like this..."I saw this girl on tv who had big boobs,who reminded me of you,so I though I'd give you a call and see what you've been up to. Anyway,I'm going to so and so place Wednesday and I..."
You see that? I didn't focus on the boob comment,I just threw it in there and kept going like it was nothing,but the girl will notice it because it's sexual.
And if she were to go back to it,I'd make it seem like she brought up the subject of boobs. I'd be like,"Huh? What are you talking about? I'm up here trying to ask you out and here you are talking about boobs.
Look,one thing at a time please. Let's go out on the date first,then we can talk about your boobs later,ok?
It's all about attraction. You got to get the sexual attraction going FIRST.
Once that's done,you can go into the comfort stage of "What classes do you like/what kind of music do you listen to/what do you like to do for fun types of questions.
If you go with the comfort first,it's a high risk of friendzone city.
So if my suggestions are too much,then that's ok,you can use something else a little less agressive,but whatever it is,it HAS TO BE SEXUAL.
It has to be. And guess what? If you don't do this,she just friendzone you and go find some guy who will.
sageproduct
Banned
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Well I guess we have evidence that I've put Mel K up on a pedestal because truthfully, I can quickly name some girls I know who I wouldn't hesitate to make the "big boobs" comment to. I don't logically know why I'm nervous to say it to Mel K, so the reason must be emotional. We'll see what happens when I call, I'll talk how I feel without being "fake".
I think I'm much less nervous now. When I play out "I saw a sexy girl who reminded me of you" in my head, it seems alright.
Sally E (quiet girl who sits in front of me in a class)
Sally E sits in front of me, Gina L (last year's prom date, LJBF) sits to the right of me, and in front of Gina L is this "popular girl" with a bf. Today I made sure to just be social and DHV by talking to all three of them. I've noticed I've gotten a little better at frame control. When first talking to Gina L, she was being unresponsive, so instead of letting the convo die down like I would have months ago, I just kept it going, kept joking, until she was in the same good mood that I was.
Well Sally E is the one of the three in this class that I'm actually trying to game, and I just didn't talk to her enough today. Talked to the other two girls more. Granted Sally E is pretty quiet, I just gotta open her up.
Humor
Ever notice when someone's trying to be funny and they're not, but it's so obvious that they're trying to make you laugh that it's just annoying? Well I just had a realization that FUNNY moments occur when you're trying to have FUN. Interesting how the words do relate together...so lately instead of "trying to be funny", I've been just having fun with everyday normal life activities, and the funny moments are always there.
Kino
Just a quick note that I feel like I've picked up a new kino "move", if you will. Instead of just touching a girl's arm or back, I like adding a little rub if it's appropriate. I've gotten VERY positive results with this. When I walked into a class today, I did this to a girl sitting behind me without saying a word and she just flat out started laughing. Then I asked her "How are you" and she was immediately in a great mood.
More sexual kino--still need work on this. When the time's right, I need to start going for the legs, hips, and lower back more.
Well I guess we have evidence that I've put Mel K up on a pedestal because truthfully, I can quickly name some girls I know who I wouldn't hesitate to make the "big boobs" comment to. I don't logically know why I'm nervous to say it to Mel K, so the reason must be emotional. We'll see what happens when I call, I'll talk how I feel without being "fake".
I think I'm much less nervous now. When I play out "I saw a sexy girl who reminded me of you" in my head, it seems alright.
Sally E (quiet girl who sits in front of me in a class)
Sally E sits in front of me, Gina L (last year's prom date, LJBF) sits to the right of me, and in front of Gina L is this "popular girl" with a bf. Today I made sure to just be social and DHV by talking to all three of them. I've noticed I've gotten a little better at frame control. When first talking to Gina L, she was being unresponsive, so instead of letting the convo die down like I would have months ago, I just kept it going, kept joking, until she was in the same good mood that I was.
Well Sally E is the one of the three in this class that I'm actually trying to game, and I just didn't talk to her enough today. Talked to the other two girls more. Granted Sally E is pretty quiet, I just gotta open her up.
Humor
Ever notice when someone's trying to be funny and they're not, but it's so obvious that they're trying to make you laugh that it's just annoying? Well I just had a realization that FUNNY moments occur when you're trying to have FUN. Interesting how the words do relate together...so lately instead of "trying to be funny", I've been just having fun with everyday normal life activities, and the funny moments are always there.
Kino
Just a quick note that I feel like I've picked up a new kino "move", if you will. Instead of just touching a girl's arm or back, I like adding a little rub if it's appropriate. I've gotten VERY positive results with this. When I walked into a class today, I did this to a girl sitting behind me without saying a word and she just flat out started laughing. Then I asked her "How are you" and she was immediately in a great mood.
More sexual kino--still need work on this. When the time's right, I need to start going for the legs, hips, and lower back more.
sageproduct
Banned
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Good day. Talked to Sally E for a bit in the hall. Could have been more outgoing in general today.
Good day. Talked to Sally E for a bit in the hall. Could have been more outgoing in general today.
Going to have to disagree about the big boobs comment: i don't think that flies at all. None of my "natural" friends or people i know are ever that outright blunt. As far as i'd know, most girls would not look well upon a comment like that.
Maybe instead say you saw this hot girl who looked like her. Or something, other than "i saw a girl with big tits like you". Thats just my opinion
Edit: It largely depends on the girl too. And as far as i know mel k isn't one of the chicks you say stuff like that too without them feeling really uncomfortable. Plus thats really out of the fcking blue given that you havent really been that flirty. Cant run before you walk etc etc etc
Maybe instead say you saw this hot girl who looked like her. Or something, other than "i saw a girl with big tits like you". Thats just my opinion
Edit: It largely depends on the girl too. And as far as i know mel k isn't one of the chicks you say stuff like that too without them feeling really uncomfortable. Plus thats really out of the fcking blue given that you havent really been that flirty. Cant run before you walk etc etc etc
Igetit!
Moderator
I hear what you're saying man.saturos said:
The thing is that you HAVE TO BE SEXAUL with a girl.
You HAVE TO BE. How can a girl be attracted to you SEXUALLY if you never do or say anything SEXUAL?
This won't work. Every guy here already knows not to tell a girl she's "hot". That doesn't create attraction,that just boosts a girl's ego and makes her go AW on you.saturos said:
On this,I 100% agree. The thing is this though...saturos said:
I assumed that after knowing each other for 4+ months that she would already be comfortable with Sage.
Normally,it only takes maybe a week or two to make a girl really comfortable with you. He's known her for almost half a year,plus has had a date with her.
If she's not comfortable after knowing him half a year,then will when she be?
I personally wouldn't date a girl if she was still frigid after all that time.
+1 rep. on this Saturos. I can't argue with you on this one.saturos said:
I told Sage that if the comments I suggested were too much,then to replace them with something else,but WHATEVER he decides to use,it HAS TO BE SEXUAL.
I GUARANTEE THIS ONE THING:If Sage doesn't get sexual with her,SHE WILL friendzone him,then she'll go find some guy who does SEXUALLY turn her on.
And that's a PROMISE.
Ya well the way i see it (regarding just the boobs comment) is that its a bit...shallow? I don't know. Its not my style so i wouldn't claim to know about it that well.
I've called up girls under the pretense that i've seen someone that looks like them but thats usually because i actually did see someone like them. When they are like "oh really" i guess telling them something like yea they had "x" like you is a possibility, but i usually say something intentionally corny because i'm relatively sarcastic and i'm not really trying to make an impression based on a comment: i'm calling spontaneously to let her in on the fun.
I've called up girls under the pretense that i've seen someone that looks like them but thats usually because i actually did see someone like them. When they are like "oh really" i guess telling them something like yea they had "x" like you is a possibility, but i usually say something intentionally corny because i'm relatively sarcastic and i'm not really trying to make an impression based on a comment: i'm calling spontaneously to let her in on the fun.
Ya well the way i see it (regarding just the boobs comment) is that its a bit...shallow? I don't know. Its not my style so i wouldn't claim to know about it that well.
I've called up girls under the pretense that i've seen someone that looks like them but thats usually because i actually did see someone like them. When they are like "oh really" i guess telling them something like yea they had "x" like you is a possibility, but i usually say something intentionally corny because i'm relatively sarcastic and i'm not really trying to make an impression based on a comment: i'm calling spontaneously to let her in on the fun.
I've called up girls under the pretense that i've seen someone that looks like them but thats usually because i actually did see someone like them. When they are like "oh really" i guess telling them something like yea they had "x" like you is a possibility, but i usually say something intentionally corny because i'm relatively sarcastic and i'm not really trying to make an impression based on a comment: i'm calling spontaneously to let her in on the fun.
Igetit!
Moderator
A bit shallow? No,of course not. It's VERY shallow. It's objectifying as well,making it seem like you're only interested in "one thing".saturos said:
And that's exactly why it's PERFECT.
I'm trying to get Sage to show her that he's a SEXUAL guy,not a "nice" one. Because if he comes off as "nice",trying to be all sweet with her,he's friendzone bound.
She'll send him to the friendzone. And while he's there,she'll be talking to him about the "bad boy" she's messing with who only wants her for sex.
Well I've done it. Plenty of times. The only thing is,you have to do it with someone with whom you ALREADY have comfort with.saturos said:
Of course you can't go around to random girls speaking like that,that's crazy.
I once got this girl's number. We went out on a date,had a good time and everything. Then one night we were talking on the phone,and somehow,we got on the subject of her boobs.
Anyway,after we got finished talking about them,I said....
me:So what's up?
her:Oh,nothing.
me:No,I mean we just got finished talking about your boobs,so um....when are you going to let me suck on them thangs?
her:AHHHH....LISTEN TO YOU!
me:What? I want to suck them.
Do you think she was angry at me? Do you think she hung up the phone and never wanted to see me again?
Of course not. The next day,SHE drove me over to her house and....umm...well...well I think you guys can take it from there.
Like I said...there has to be comfort there first. I assumed Sage and Mel k already has comfort,after knowing each other for 1/2 a year.
But you're right Saturos. If there isn't any comfort there,then he shouldn't make comments like that. But he does need to build enough comfort to get to that point,though.
But I'm tell you....if he doesn't EVENUTALLY go sexual with her,she'll find a guy who will,and you can believe that.
sageproduct
Banned
Well to clear up any misconceptions, I think there's actually less comfort than you think and "having known each other for almost half a year" is kind of unrepresentative of how much Mel K and I know each other.
10/21--she randomly started a conversation with me on Facebook chat (I got her # but it was to talk about schoolwork)
Next two months--We texted occasionally, about once every two weeks. And they were short convos too. She initiated most of the conversations
December, shortly before Xmas--our date. Up til today, this has actually been the ONLY time I've EVER seen her in person. Even though we go to the same public high school, we don't have any classes together and I don't see her between classes either.
For 2 weeks after our date--I was chasing her with texts, here's when I lost all the control and when she pulled the "I'm busy"
NC until 2 weeks ago
communicate twice electronically, both times she mentions not having seen me in a while
I'm not sure exactly how this information changes your advice regarding the "big boobs" comment specifically, but I see that that's beside the point. The point is for me to be sexual, and the point is larger than Mel K. Sure, suddenly being sexual with her now would be a sign of incongruency with my former, asexual self, but from MY perspective, it's ME creating a new identity. And I'm more important than her because it's MY life.
10/21--she randomly started a conversation with me on Facebook chat (I got her # but it was to talk about schoolwork)
Next two months--We texted occasionally, about once every two weeks. And they were short convos too. She initiated most of the conversations
December, shortly before Xmas--our date. Up til today, this has actually been the ONLY time I've EVER seen her in person. Even though we go to the same public high school, we don't have any classes together and I don't see her between classes either.
For 2 weeks after our date--I was chasing her with texts, here's when I lost all the control and when she pulled the "I'm busy"
NC until 2 weeks ago
communicate twice electronically, both times she mentions not having seen me in a while
I'm not sure exactly how this information changes your advice regarding the "big boobs" comment specifically, but I see that that's beside the point. The point is for me to be sexual, and the point is larger than Mel K. Sure, suddenly being sexual with her now would be a sign of incongruency with my former, asexual self, but from MY perspective, it's ME creating a new identity. And I'm more important than her because it's MY life.
sageproduct
Banned
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Wow it's been forever since I've updated.
Gina L (practice b1tch)
The good thing about this girl is that she continues to act sexual even though I'm clearly in the friendzone with her (she rejected my k-close a month ago). I'm not really interested in her, save for the occasional lusty thought, making her a perfect target for me to practice and work on my game. Primarily right now, I'm trying to be more sexual in my interactions with girls.
Today--I gave Gina L a direct compliment on her looks by just saying plainly, "You look nice," to which she responded by quietly saying "thanks". I noticed that immediately after this, any way I'd interact with her sexually/romantically would be much easier. Also, compliments aren't AFC as long as they are used in conjunction with C&F and only sparingly, right? I'm just trying to flirt with her whenever I can, which is still a bit of a struggle with me. Just gotta get used to it.
Sherman C (athletic, nexted a while ago)
I do kinda still like this girl, but I know there's just nothing there. All the signs of low interest are there. I already messed up with her waaaaay back when I started this journal by using C&F incorrectly and basically just not showing my interest (by taking her out) even though she was showing plenty of IOIs.
Only reason I'm mentioning her is cause after school today a girl I'm friends with came right up to me and said, "Do you like Sherman C?" Well, I knew not to give a straight answer but I think I still could have handled it better than I did. I think I said something like "Oh why would you ask me that" and she said "cuz I always see you guys in the hall together and you're always smiling/laughing" and I just kinda shot back "Oh do you like her" and walked away. Whatever
Wow it's been forever since I've updated.
Gina L (practice b1tch)
The good thing about this girl is that she continues to act sexual even though I'm clearly in the friendzone with her (she rejected my k-close a month ago). I'm not really interested in her, save for the occasional lusty thought, making her a perfect target for me to practice and work on my game. Primarily right now, I'm trying to be more sexual in my interactions with girls.
Today--I gave Gina L a direct compliment on her looks by just saying plainly, "You look nice," to which she responded by quietly saying "thanks". I noticed that immediately after this, any way I'd interact with her sexually/romantically would be much easier. Also, compliments aren't AFC as long as they are used in conjunction with C&F and only sparingly, right? I'm just trying to flirt with her whenever I can, which is still a bit of a struggle with me. Just gotta get used to it.
Sherman C (athletic, nexted a while ago)
I do kinda still like this girl, but I know there's just nothing there. All the signs of low interest are there. I already messed up with her waaaaay back when I started this journal by using C&F incorrectly and basically just not showing my interest (by taking her out) even though she was showing plenty of IOIs.
Only reason I'm mentioning her is cause after school today a girl I'm friends with came right up to me and said, "Do you like Sherman C?" Well, I knew not to give a straight answer but I think I still could have handled it better than I did. I think I said something like "Oh why would you ask me that" and she said "cuz I always see you guys in the hall together and you're always smiling/laughing" and I just kinda shot back "Oh do you like her" and walked away. Whatever
sageproduct
Banned
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Alright, I know many times in this thread I've used "popular" to describe people very often and I seem preoccupied with it, but I just see it as a way of measuring my proof and how I've progressed.
Today I was talking to a popular girl (hb 8, bf) for a bit in the hall. I actually approached her as she was talking to her friend, another popular girl, who I hadn't talked to before. I realized that I INTERRUPTED their conversation and successfully put the attention on myself. Was kinda happy afterward that I did that. We just chatted a bit about class, and at first I noticed I was only talking to the girl I knew and the other one seemed to be getting bored, so I immediately involved her too by asking her a question. I had never talked to her before, and now we aren't strangers anymore...which isn't anything in itself, but it made me realize again that everything should be easy and natural.
Petunia S (hot LJBF, big time attention *****)
Last year I hung out with this girl and my old group of friends every single weekend, and I always secretly liked her. This school year, I was plain mean to her in the beginning (wrongly using C&F...oops) and I've given her VERY little attention. I think the last time I talked to her was a month ago.
Yesterday, I saw her walking down the hall in front of me after class and I grabbed her shoulders and moved my hands up and down on her arms and put one arm around her as I walked up to her side to start talking to her. I wasn't "trying" anything, I just felt like doing it and it was natural. I noticed how immediately something begin to light up in her eyes and we talked very briefly before going separate ways.
Today I was eating some peanuts when she walked into class. Conversation:
"Can I have some of your peanuts?"
"Well, Petunia S. What do you have for me?"
she thinks about it for a second. "Umm...You can have my love"
So predictable. I actually thought she would say this. "Petunia S I already have your love. I need something more"
"Umm...my body"
right HERE I could have easily made it sexual cuz well, she already set it up for me. But instead, I actually kind of just insulted her. Dumb me. "Your body? Let me see how much your body is worth..." and I took one peanut out, broke it in half, bit the smallest possible piece I could, and gave it to her.
What are some sexual things I could have said instead?
Should I have taken the "offer" like "Ok when you gonna pay up" or played repulsion by saying "Petunia S stop trying to get in my pants"?
Erin S (girl I had a class with first semester)
She graduated early, I had a class with her, I didn't fwcking engage her until like the second to last day of first semester and didn't # close her and now she's gone. Dumb of me. Today though, she randomly sent me a message on Facebook chat out of the blue. "hows math" she said.
Well Facebook tells me she has a bf, but of course I'm supposed to disregard it. We chatted for a bit and suddenly we got into a deep conversation. It was a little weird, but I was actually the one who started it. It all started when she said something about hating people and I just asked "how many people do you trust" and we had a pretty deep convo.
I didn't make any direct sexual comments. I'm still not good with them...yet. I noticed that many times I actually directly said a few things/asked questions that easily could have pissed her off or suggested that I was challenging her. I noticed I didn't care and wasn't scared or even concerned with her reaction.
It was kinda weird cuz she told me a few things that I normally wouldn't tell someone I had only talked to a few times. When we were talking about trusting people, she just said "I can't even trust ______" and named this girl she's good friends with in the class we had together. I was like, woa...kind of alarmed me a bit. Says something about this girl. Then says her bf is really the only person she trusts (I met him once way before, cool guy, but I'm pretty sure they've known each other for a very short time) Later on she told me another thing that I'd consider more personal. I think I said "Seems like I'm already one of those people you trust
" and she said that I am. OK....
I got bored of the convo after a little while and decided talking to her more online was no good, so I said plainly in 2 messages
I gotta go do a project
let's hang out next weekend
Without a word, she sent me her number with a smiley face. I said I'd send her a text right now (just so she'd have my number) then said cya. I texted her, she texted back "what up foo. what's your project" and I just didn't feel like responding.
Something's up though about the deep conversation we had...idk. I wasn't even trying to game her at first but later I realized, "why the f not" so I # closed.
Alright, I know many times in this thread I've used "popular" to describe people very often and I seem preoccupied with it, but I just see it as a way of measuring my proof and how I've progressed.
Today I was talking to a popular girl (hb 8, bf) for a bit in the hall. I actually approached her as she was talking to her friend, another popular girl, who I hadn't talked to before. I realized that I INTERRUPTED their conversation and successfully put the attention on myself. Was kinda happy afterward that I did that. We just chatted a bit about class, and at first I noticed I was only talking to the girl I knew and the other one seemed to be getting bored, so I immediately involved her too by asking her a question. I had never talked to her before, and now we aren't strangers anymore...which isn't anything in itself, but it made me realize again that everything should be easy and natural.
Petunia S (hot LJBF, big time attention *****)
Last year I hung out with this girl and my old group of friends every single weekend, and I always secretly liked her. This school year, I was plain mean to her in the beginning (wrongly using C&F...oops) and I've given her VERY little attention. I think the last time I talked to her was a month ago.
Yesterday, I saw her walking down the hall in front of me after class and I grabbed her shoulders and moved my hands up and down on her arms and put one arm around her as I walked up to her side to start talking to her. I wasn't "trying" anything, I just felt like doing it and it was natural. I noticed how immediately something begin to light up in her eyes and we talked very briefly before going separate ways.
Today I was eating some peanuts when she walked into class. Conversation:
"Can I have some of your peanuts?"
"Well, Petunia S. What do you have for me?"
she thinks about it for a second. "Umm...You can have my love"
So predictable. I actually thought she would say this. "Petunia S I already have your love. I need something more"
"Umm...my body"
right HERE I could have easily made it sexual cuz well, she already set it up for me. But instead, I actually kind of just insulted her. Dumb me. "Your body? Let me see how much your body is worth..." and I took one peanut out, broke it in half, bit the smallest possible piece I could, and gave it to her.
What are some sexual things I could have said instead?
Should I have taken the "offer" like "Ok when you gonna pay up" or played repulsion by saying "Petunia S stop trying to get in my pants"?
Erin S (girl I had a class with first semester)
She graduated early, I had a class with her, I didn't fwcking engage her until like the second to last day of first semester and didn't # close her and now she's gone. Dumb of me. Today though, she randomly sent me a message on Facebook chat out of the blue. "hows math" she said.
Well Facebook tells me she has a bf, but of course I'm supposed to disregard it. We chatted for a bit and suddenly we got into a deep conversation. It was a little weird, but I was actually the one who started it. It all started when she said something about hating people and I just asked "how many people do you trust" and we had a pretty deep convo.
I didn't make any direct sexual comments. I'm still not good with them...yet. I noticed that many times I actually directly said a few things/asked questions that easily could have pissed her off or suggested that I was challenging her. I noticed I didn't care and wasn't scared or even concerned with her reaction.
It was kinda weird cuz she told me a few things that I normally wouldn't tell someone I had only talked to a few times. When we were talking about trusting people, she just said "I can't even trust ______" and named this girl she's good friends with in the class we had together. I was like, woa...kind of alarmed me a bit. Says something about this girl. Then says her bf is really the only person she trusts (I met him once way before, cool guy, but I'm pretty sure they've known each other for a very short time) Later on she told me another thing that I'd consider more personal. I think I said "Seems like I'm already one of those people you trust
" and she said that I am. OK....I got bored of the convo after a little while and decided talking to her more online was no good, so I said plainly in 2 messages
I gotta go do a project
let's hang out next weekend
Without a word, she sent me her number with a smiley face. I said I'd send her a text right now (just so she'd have my number) then said cya. I texted her, she texted back "what up foo. what's your project" and I just didn't feel like responding.
Something's up though about the deep conversation we had...idk. I wasn't even trying to game her at first but later I realized, "why the f not" so I # closed.
sageproduct
Banned
Monday, March 8, 2010
AFC or Manly?
Only thing I remember from today was walking into a class when four girls in that class were also on their way in. I grabbed the door open and let all four in before me. Of course, the moment I did this I thought, "Is this AFC?" the last girl, the nicest and surprisingly also best-looking, said "Such a great guy" and then complimented my haircut. I know that "great guy" could easily mean "nice guy" though.
Maybe I'm overanalyzing this, but I kept thinking about this after I did it. Maybe it's the way I do it that makes it either characteristic of an AFC or a gentleman?
Gina L (practice b1tch)
The quest to be more sexual continues...today our teacher said "talk to me" or something to her in spanish and it was kinda weird and somehow I turned to her and mocked it, changing it to "do me". Then she put her foot on my desk to tie her shoe, so I smacked my hand down onto her shoe and happened to be really close to her when I said, "This is unacceptable." I think she gave me a more flirty look and said sorry. I could/should have extended it to something like "so what are you gonna do to pay for your actions"
AFC or Manly?
Only thing I remember from today was walking into a class when four girls in that class were also on their way in. I grabbed the door open and let all four in before me. Of course, the moment I did this I thought, "Is this AFC?" the last girl, the nicest and surprisingly also best-looking, said "Such a great guy" and then complimented my haircut. I know that "great guy" could easily mean "nice guy" though.
Maybe I'm overanalyzing this, but I kept thinking about this after I did it. Maybe it's the way I do it that makes it either characteristic of an AFC or a gentleman?
Gina L (practice b1tch)
The quest to be more sexual continues...today our teacher said "talk to me" or something to her in spanish and it was kinda weird and somehow I turned to her and mocked it, changing it to "do me". Then she put her foot on my desk to tie her shoe, so I smacked my hand down onto her shoe and happened to be really close to her when I said, "This is unacceptable." I think she gave me a more flirty look and said sorry. I could/should have extended it to something like "so what are you gonna do to pay for your actions"
sageproduct
Banned
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Being not a b1tch
(diffusing disrespect)
I was doing group work today in the class I have with Gina L. The group was her, a popular b1tchy girl with a bf, and a guy I'm on pretty good terms with. I lost nose-goes for writing our sh1t and was working while everyone else was having a conversation about colleges n stuff. I made a point here and there and at one point stopped working to join in the convo. When there was a moment of silence, the group looked at me and the ****y girl goes, "Are we done yet? C'mon, I thought you were supposed to be asian" Here was another situation that I didn't know how quite to respond to--it's clear I should have diffused that disrespect, but I wasn't able to do it in a way that was both humorous and didn't make it seem that I was getting fussy about doing groupwork. I think I smiled at her and said something calmly but I don't really remember.
Petunia S (hot LJBF)
I had a marker in my hand for some reason once class started, so without even thinking I told Petunia S to let me see her hand (kino). I drew the first thing that came to my mind, which was an asian smiley face. She looked at it, laughed, then said, "What does this mean? Are you marking me as your property?" I responded, "Petunia S, you already were my property." I hesitated a little here and a cool guy sitting on the other side finished, "that just made it official", to which I agreed. Should have taken the flirt up to another level but a girl sitting next to me started talking to me.
I guess I might hang out with her this weekend? I've been pretty far in the friend zone with her but I've cut off interaction with her for a while and am sure that I act differently from what she's used to from me. The question is...how different? I'll find out soon.
It goes on and on forever...Mel K
The last time I talked to her was when she messaged me 2 weeks ago on FB chat, and even that was during NC. I was being polite but uninterested. Last night, I decided I'd call her and stir up some emotions. It was around 9:45, and she didn't pick up. Naturally, I've read David Deangelo's columns, which advise not to leave girls voicemails, so I didn't leave one. I also decided against texting her to leave the mystery of "he called me..."
Tonight I was just chilling, thinking, "should I call her again? Does that signify persistence, or desperation? Will it be weird if she just gets two calls from me?" when she messaged me on FB chat.
her: hey ohh
me: hey Mel K how are you
her: good goood. sick. you?
did you calll mer yesterday? .. i believe my phone is stupid.
me: sick of missing me? yaa i did
her: oh yes. thats definitely it.
and you dont leave a voicemail? see i find that semiannoying. cause then i have to wonder the reason.
me: voicemail is obsolete
her: so if people dont answer thats it? harsh.
me: you're telling me you LIKE having to make a phone call just to hear a message?
her: okay no. i actually rather hate it and delete them before listening. but still..
orrr a text is good. because its so much simpler but not as complicated.
me: agreed, yet i just don't like texting that much
her: but when the phone call fails it seems like a good alternate to leaving a voicemail. correct?
me: haha, not necessarily
her: haha okay fine. you win.
me:. so when we hangin out katie? (ahhh i should have been declarative here instead of leaving it up to her. don't know why i asked her)
her: sooon. like possibly weekend after next?
me: weekend AFTER next..that's already ambiguous. how about friday (i did it AGAIN. dammit)
her: but im busy this weekend
me: with me
her: you havent talked to me in forever so you are not in my first priority time
sorrrry
but thee weekend following this weekend im pretty good
(i was stuck here for a bit...here's a girl talking down to me AND communicating that she's high-maintenance...)
me: haha ok i know you're pretty heartbroken from not getting my attention...but i'm here now am i (did this sound to much like i was trying to please her?) (also, i wanted to turn the tables around on HER by also saying something about having other commitments beside her...but i couldn't seem to say it without making it obvious and superficial)
her: absolutely. goood good
okay well considering my sickly state of being i am going to sleeep. good night
me: wait
i wanna see you friday. (persistence is good, as long as it's not desperate....so i thought?)
her: wait. next friday.
me: man you don't back down ever do you
her: i cant change what is already scheduled to happen. it doesnt work like that.
me: what could POSSIBLY be more important than seeing me (classic C&F, here i thought i've done enough badgering about seeing her this friday and i'd cut it out after this)
her: maybe seeing some other people that i have been putting off for quite a while
me: hahahahaaa (i was almost about to say that she sounded angry)
her: and sleep. its pretty important as well.
and im not exactly sure why thats amusing. but alright
me: that second one is 100% BS but fine
her: not true. im currently suffering from lack thereof
speaking of which... good night!
me: 'night
The worst part about all this is that I'm having some one-itis symptoms for her, and it's driving me crazy sometimes...The last few weeks have been consumed by my mind convincing me that she's interested (which is usually a GOOD thing, but it's a bad thing here) when she should be NEXTED.
I'm a really optimistic guy, and it's hurting me here cuz my mind's too fixiated on her and not the bigger picture.
The begging, AFC in me thinks...
-she talked to me! she's interested!
But really it's...
-I called her and she wants to know why. She wants my attention
-if she really were interested, she'd be calling/texting ME before i tried to contact her...(which is how it was in the beginning when she randomly started talking to me)
the AFC thinks...
-she's really busy! but she still likes me cuz she said "next weekend"!
Really....
-no. if she were interested, she'd either break her plans to see me, MAKE time to see me, or if that REALLy couldn't be done, maybe suggested sunday or something when nobody does sh1t.
The fool in me keeps trying to maintain "hope" that she's interested by reminding me that "she's such a shy girl, if she's acting this way with you, that means she's interested" and for some reason keeps convincing me that there's a chance she's playing this huge "game" with me.
The fool in me keeps trying to make me think that I just "have to show her more attention because she likes me but is scared of being heartbroken so she knows that i actually do care"
Now that I've typed all that out, it's much easier to see how full of sh1t that "fool" in me really is.
Also, she literally said that she moved me down on her list cuz I "hadn't talked to her in a while". This sounds like what girls would do in girl-to-girl friendships...Plus, the whole point of NC'ing was to be scarce and make her value my presence more. Clearly, this has not happened because she quickly and easily left the conversation.
EDIT: one last thing is,when I was first breaking out of being extremely antisocial I was studying Dale Carnegie's How To Win Friends and Influence People, which advised always talking about the other person's interests and showing them general interest. I also knew to let the girl talk about herself. Now though, I know not to let a girl ramble on and on about her sh1t and to flirt with her instead. Because of this, I didn't even ask her about her sickness at all. That was a GOOD thing, right? Or does it just show social ignorance?
Being not a b1tch
(diffusing disrespect)
I was doing group work today in the class I have with Gina L. The group was her, a popular b1tchy girl with a bf, and a guy I'm on pretty good terms with. I lost nose-goes for writing our sh1t and was working while everyone else was having a conversation about colleges n stuff. I made a point here and there and at one point stopped working to join in the convo. When there was a moment of silence, the group looked at me and the ****y girl goes, "Are we done yet? C'mon, I thought you were supposed to be asian" Here was another situation that I didn't know how quite to respond to--it's clear I should have diffused that disrespect, but I wasn't able to do it in a way that was both humorous and didn't make it seem that I was getting fussy about doing groupwork. I think I smiled at her and said something calmly but I don't really remember.
Petunia S (hot LJBF)
I had a marker in my hand for some reason once class started, so without even thinking I told Petunia S to let me see her hand (kino). I drew the first thing that came to my mind, which was an asian smiley face. She looked at it, laughed, then said, "What does this mean? Are you marking me as your property?" I responded, "Petunia S, you already were my property." I hesitated a little here and a cool guy sitting on the other side finished, "that just made it official", to which I agreed. Should have taken the flirt up to another level but a girl sitting next to me started talking to me.
I guess I might hang out with her this weekend? I've been pretty far in the friend zone with her but I've cut off interaction with her for a while and am sure that I act differently from what she's used to from me. The question is...how different? I'll find out soon.
It goes on and on forever...Mel K
The last time I talked to her was when she messaged me 2 weeks ago on FB chat, and even that was during NC. I was being polite but uninterested. Last night, I decided I'd call her and stir up some emotions. It was around 9:45, and she didn't pick up. Naturally, I've read David Deangelo's columns, which advise not to leave girls voicemails, so I didn't leave one. I also decided against texting her to leave the mystery of "he called me..."
Tonight I was just chilling, thinking, "should I call her again? Does that signify persistence, or desperation? Will it be weird if she just gets two calls from me?" when she messaged me on FB chat.
her: hey ohh
me: hey Mel K how are you
her: good goood. sick. you?
did you calll mer yesterday? .. i believe my phone is stupid.
me: sick of missing me? yaa i did
her: oh yes. thats definitely it.
and you dont leave a voicemail? see i find that semiannoying. cause then i have to wonder the reason.
me: voicemail is obsolete
her: so if people dont answer thats it? harsh.
me: you're telling me you LIKE having to make a phone call just to hear a message?
her: okay no. i actually rather hate it and delete them before listening. but still..
orrr a text is good. because its so much simpler but not as complicated.
me: agreed, yet i just don't like texting that much
her: but when the phone call fails it seems like a good alternate to leaving a voicemail. correct?
me: haha, not necessarily
her: haha okay fine. you win.
me:
. so when we hangin out katie? (ahhh i should have been declarative here instead of leaving it up to her. don't know why i asked her)her: sooon. like possibly weekend after next?
me: weekend AFTER next..that's already ambiguous. how about friday (i did it AGAIN. dammit)
her: but im busy this weekend
me: with me
her: you havent talked to me in forever so you are not in my first priority time
sorrrry
but thee weekend following this weekend im pretty good
(i was stuck here for a bit...here's a girl talking down to me AND communicating that she's high-maintenance...)
me: haha ok i know you're pretty heartbroken from not getting my attention...but i'm here now am i (did this sound to much like i was trying to please her?) (also, i wanted to turn the tables around on HER by also saying something about having other commitments beside her...but i couldn't seem to say it without making it obvious and superficial)
her: absolutely. goood good
okay well considering my sickly state of being i am going to sleeep. good night
me: wait
i wanna see you friday. (persistence is good, as long as it's not desperate....so i thought?)
her: wait. next friday.
me: man you don't back down ever do you
her: i cant change what is already scheduled to happen. it doesnt work like that.
me: what could POSSIBLY be more important than seeing me (classic C&F, here i thought i've done enough badgering about seeing her this friday and i'd cut it out after this)
her: maybe seeing some other people that i have been putting off for quite a while
me: hahahahaaa (i was almost about to say that she sounded angry)
her: and sleep. its pretty important as well.
and im not exactly sure why thats amusing. but alright
me: that second one is 100% BS but fine
her: not true. im currently suffering from lack thereof
speaking of which... good night!
me: 'night
The worst part about all this is that I'm having some one-itis symptoms for her, and it's driving me crazy sometimes...The last few weeks have been consumed by my mind convincing me that she's interested (which is usually a GOOD thing, but it's a bad thing here) when she should be NEXTED.
I'm a really optimistic guy, and it's hurting me here cuz my mind's too fixiated on her and not the bigger picture.
The begging, AFC in me thinks...
-she talked to me! she's interested!
But really it's...
-I called her and she wants to know why. She wants my attention
-if she really were interested, she'd be calling/texting ME before i tried to contact her...(which is how it was in the beginning when she randomly started talking to me)
the AFC thinks...
-she's really busy! but she still likes me cuz she said "next weekend"!
Really....
-no. if she were interested, she'd either break her plans to see me, MAKE time to see me, or if that REALLy couldn't be done, maybe suggested sunday or something when nobody does sh1t.
The fool in me keeps trying to maintain "hope" that she's interested by reminding me that "she's such a shy girl, if she's acting this way with you, that means she's interested" and for some reason keeps convincing me that there's a chance she's playing this huge "game" with me.
The fool in me keeps trying to make me think that I just "have to show her more attention because she likes me but is scared of being heartbroken so she knows that i actually do care"
Now that I've typed all that out, it's much easier to see how full of sh1t that "fool" in me really is.
Also, she literally said that she moved me down on her list cuz I "hadn't talked to her in a while". This sounds like what girls would do in girl-to-girl friendships...Plus, the whole point of NC'ing was to be scarce and make her value my presence more. Clearly, this has not happened because she quickly and easily left the conversation.
EDIT: one last thing is,when I was first breaking out of being extremely antisocial I was studying Dale Carnegie's How To Win Friends and Influence People, which advised always talking about the other person's interests and showing them general interest. I also knew to let the girl talk about herself. Now though, I know not to let a girl ramble on and on about her sh1t and to flirt with her instead. Because of this, I didn't even ask her about her sickness at all. That was a GOOD thing, right? Or does it just show social ignorance?
hey man keep it up, it looks like your c&f speech is improving a lot -- I'm going to start stealing some of your lines
regarding asking about her sickness, I think its fine that you ignored it. when I read your conversation I didn't even notice that you didn't ask about it, since the conversation naturally flowed towards the missed phone call. the sick thing just kindof got pushed aside. besides, even if you asked, what would she say? "runny nose, sore throat." boooringg.
regarding asking about her sickness, I think its fine that you ignored it. when I read your conversation I didn't even notice that you didn't ask about it, since the conversation naturally flowed towards the missed phone call. the sick thing just kindof got pushed aside. besides, even if you asked, what would she say? "runny nose, sore throat." boooringg.
sageproduct
Banned
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Seriously...I need to get over this girl. It ends now
Mel K (nearing one-itis...until now)
Saw her on Friday at school talking to her friend. She didn't see me so I brushed her arm and chatted with her for like 2 seconds, asked her some random question.
Today, I was in a really serious mood for some reason when I called her. It was a really quick convo, like less than 30 seconds, and my voice was probably a monotone.
Her: Hello?
Me: Hey what's up? (dumb...I called her)
Her: Oh...nothing, how bout you?
Me: Nothing, what are you doing? (BORING and typical)
Her: I'm busy right now (wow........)
Me: Ok well I'm gonna go out and do a bunch of stuff later tonight wanna come with me
Her: Umm, I'm not sure can I let you know?
Me: Yeah send me a text in like 3 hours
Her: Ok
Me: Ok cya
Should have known right away that this was a bust. Needless to say, I got a text from her 2 hours later saying "So I forgot tonight is family dindin and I cannot leave". I didn't bother responding.
I feel like everything I've learned since being here I've done wrong with this girl. Letting one-itis take over me really brought back the AFC in full form and ruined my game. Next.
Seriously...I need to get over this girl. It ends now
Mel K (nearing one-itis...until now)
Saw her on Friday at school talking to her friend. She didn't see me so I brushed her arm and chatted with her for like 2 seconds, asked her some random question.
Today, I was in a really serious mood for some reason when I called her. It was a really quick convo, like less than 30 seconds, and my voice was probably a monotone.
Her: Hello?
Me: Hey what's up? (dumb...I called her)
Her: Oh...nothing, how bout you?
Me: Nothing, what are you doing? (BORING and typical)
Her: I'm busy right now (wow........)
Me: Ok well I'm gonna go out and do a bunch of stuff later tonight wanna come with me
Her: Umm, I'm not sure can I let you know?
Me: Yeah send me a text in like 3 hours
Her: Ok
Me: Ok cya
Should have known right away that this was a bust. Needless to say, I got a text from her 2 hours later saying "So I forgot tonight is family dindin and I cannot leave". I didn't bother responding.
I feel like everything I've learned since being here I've done wrong with this girl. Letting one-itis take over me really brought back the AFC in full form and ruined my game. Next.
sageproduct
Banned
Monday, March 22, 2010
I've been crazy busy but it's time to keep this thing going.
Being More Sexual
It's finally starting to clear up for me.
Gina L(practice b1tch)-she was taking off her sweater in class today and I said, "Stop stripping in front of me". It's easier for me to be sexual with her than with any other girl, so I'm really trying to use her to get more comfortable with it. When I talk to her now, I'm just trying to find moments where I can jump on an innuendo and just be flirty. It's been missing from my game all my life.
Prom
Prom's coming up soon for us, which means I gotta decide around the beginning of April who I'm gonna ask because the acceptable time to ask someone is 2-4 weeks before the actual dance. As of now, it's not looking too good...here are my options as of right now
Sherman C (athletic girl, i know i'm friendzoned)
I don't know why, but I keep thinking about taking her and making her happy. It's possible that she's never been to a high school dance, and if she has it was probably by herself with a group of girls freshman year. I'm pretty sure guys have stayed away from her because although she's cute, she's never seen wearing anything other than jeans/hoodie or bball shorts/t-shirt. I know that she does secretly have that desire to dress up and get pretty for a night though...I just feel like I wanna let that out for her, even if it might seem weird.
Main problem is that I already fwcked up my chances with her first semester of this school year when I started getting to know her. She was definitely throwing me IOI's, but I fwcked it up by NOT SHOWING SEXUAL INTEREST in her by NOT CLOSING, and overusing C&F as I was still learning it at the time. The good thing is though, if we end up going to the dance together that can change things due to the nature of dances...
Gina L (practice b1tch)
This is my surefire backup plan. I went to prom with her last year. She's really pretty good-looking but seems to socially exclude herself, so there won't really be any competition (I don't think). I know that we'd have fun together too since we've got some really good rapport, and I can practice flirting with her without any pressure. Only thing is, I really only wanna ask her as a last resort cuz I already went with her last year.
Those were really the only two on my mind. But if I really think a little more...
Binny K (first kiss)
So after I fwcked up with her by (again) NOT BEING SEXUAL, she kind of ignored me for a while and I did my part in NC. By now, we're back to normal, like nothing had ever happened. She could also be a backup because I'm pretty sure no one else is planning on asking her as of now.
Also another girl who's friends with Binny K and Gina L could be a possibility.
I've been crazy busy but it's time to keep this thing going.
Being More Sexual
It's finally starting to clear up for me.
Gina L(practice b1tch)-she was taking off her sweater in class today and I said, "Stop stripping in front of me". It's easier for me to be sexual with her than with any other girl, so I'm really trying to use her to get more comfortable with it. When I talk to her now, I'm just trying to find moments where I can jump on an innuendo and just be flirty. It's been missing from my game all my life.
Prom
Prom's coming up soon for us, which means I gotta decide around the beginning of April who I'm gonna ask because the acceptable time to ask someone is 2-4 weeks before the actual dance. As of now, it's not looking too good...here are my options as of right now
Sherman C (athletic girl, i know i'm friendzoned)
I don't know why, but I keep thinking about taking her and making her happy. It's possible that she's never been to a high school dance, and if she has it was probably by herself with a group of girls freshman year. I'm pretty sure guys have stayed away from her because although she's cute, she's never seen wearing anything other than jeans/hoodie or bball shorts/t-shirt. I know that she does secretly have that desire to dress up and get pretty for a night though...I just feel like I wanna let that out for her, even if it might seem weird.
Main problem is that I already fwcked up my chances with her first semester of this school year when I started getting to know her. She was definitely throwing me IOI's, but I fwcked it up by NOT SHOWING SEXUAL INTEREST in her by NOT CLOSING, and overusing C&F as I was still learning it at the time. The good thing is though, if we end up going to the dance together that can change things due to the nature of dances...
Gina L (practice b1tch)
This is my surefire backup plan. I went to prom with her last year. She's really pretty good-looking but seems to socially exclude herself, so there won't really be any competition (I don't think). I know that we'd have fun together too since we've got some really good rapport, and I can practice flirting with her without any pressure. Only thing is, I really only wanna ask her as a last resort cuz I already went with her last year.
Those were really the only two on my mind. But if I really think a little more...
Binny K (first kiss)
So after I fwcked up with her by (again) NOT BEING SEXUAL, she kind of ignored me for a while and I did my part in NC. By now, we're back to normal, like nothing had ever happened. She could also be a backup because I'm pretty sure no one else is planning on asking her as of now.
Also another girl who's friends with Binny K and Gina L could be a possibility.