red flag or not at all..(LTR GF)

[shark]

Well we're both in H.S. and we're talking about something our classes have planned for next year. We were talking about stuff we can do and fun stuff..but then she said something like "well, thats if we're still going out" and i was just like whaat. And she said "yea..its in a year if were still goin out, whats the big deal". So then i said somtin like yeah well if were still going out then itll be almost a few years..like were married holycrap. And she was like dont even say marriage its scary and somehow somtin got brought up and she said somtin like "well if you only had sex w/ one person your whole life youll get bored and ull have sexual fantasies and u will be screwed or have to get divocred". (this is kinda true, but idk if i'd want to hear it out of HER mouth) and i just kind of lol'ed at her and kind aagreed and said its better to exp. others and if its meant to be, its meant to be. So basically i feel like alot was said..what do you guys think? BTW next year we will be graduating...so its still about 1.5 years untill college.

Hmm (btw we've been going out for 8months)

 

[abcd_z]

In this case, it's kind of hard to tell from the context. I personally wouldn't worry about it, because it seems like a natural assumption to make, "Well, maybe we won't be together that far down the road". You've done fine so far, right? Then don't worry about it.

 

[\O/]

First off you're still in highschool and shouldn't even BE in a serious relationship. Because we all know it will end sooner or later unless you plan on marrying this chick.. (Which we know she isn't interested in)

It's definitaly a red flag, in the sense that she doesn't see you two together for the long run. Neither should you. You will miss out on alot. I say this from experience. I threw away almost 4 of my best years on a girl I no longer have any contact with. If I had found this site back then and started working on my game and applied my knowledge, I could have been AMAZING with women today!

Stay with her for experience and practice, but shift your focus a bit. Don't get too attached to her and be sure to have other options and alternatives. Roll with the punches, but be aware that things can change around really fast. Be sure not to get one-itis.

Good luck

 

[Warlord]

POST IN THE HIGH SCHOOL FORUM!

 

[MetalFortress]

Originally posted by shark
Well we're both in H.S. and we're talking about something our classes have planned for next year. We were talking about stuff we can do and fun stuff..but then she said something like "well, thats if we're still going out" and i was just like whaat. And she said "yea..its in a year if were still goin out, whats the big deal". So then i said somtin like yeah well if were still going out then itll be almost a few years..like were married holycrap. And she was like dont even say marriage its scary and somehow somtin got brought up and she said somtin like "well if you only had sex w/ one person your whole life youll get bored and ull have sexual fantasies and u will be screwed or have to get divocred". (this is kinda true, but idk if i'd want to hear it out of HER mouth) and i just kind of lol'ed at her and kind aagreed and said its better to exp. others and if its meant to be, its meant to be. So basically i feel like alot was said..what do you guys think? BTW next year we will be graduating...so its still about 1.5 years untill college.

Hmm (btw we've been going out for 8months)

Are you kidding me? RED FLAG!! If she is truly into you and in love with you, she will be thinking marriage, and assuming that you two will be together forever. Your girl is just with you because she doesn't want to be single. Bail. Give her what she doesn't want.

 

[Bobbles]

In my opinion it is such a big red flag you should just end it RIGHT NOW. Not only is she intimating she may not be with you in a years time but she has clearly said at some point in the future she wants to be shagging someone else.

From her point of view therefore in the long run (as in even in a years time) there is no hope for this relationship. My friend had his girlfriend say the same thing. She dumped him within a couple of months.

Make sure it is you doing the dumping and do it NOW. Trust me, there is no hope for this relationship.

I am 21 my girlfriend is 20. We are in college, not THAT much older than you. The sort of stuff I get from her is "I couldn't imagine being with anyone else, ever". "I couldn't stand you sleeping with anyone else ever". Etc. Your girl is saying the exact opposite. Sometimes it is me who jokingly says "hey babe, slow down, who knows what the future holds" and she's always like "no, don't like that idea" etc.

I repeat. End it NOW before she dumps you, which SHE WILL if you don't.

 

[biker_gixxer]

Stay with her for experience and practice, but shift your focus a bit. Don't get too attached to her and be sure to have other options and alternatives. Roll with the punches, but be aware that things can change around really fast. Be sure not to get one-itis.

I agree 100% with this, especially the pratice part. If you let this girl's little comment throw you off balance, wait until you try chatting up some college girls.


"well, thats if we're still going out"

This is how girls assume control of a relationship (or situation), if you let them anyway. What you should have said was...

"yeah, i might have replaced you by then"

See? You haven't given her any power at all with a comment like this. She tried to take it and you smacked her hand for trying.