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Question about the No Contact thing?
- Thread starter bario
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MrJack
Master Don Juan
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In the early stages of getting to know eachother there's no need to even text eachother except for maybe a little inside joke or some flirting DIRECTLY BEFORE setting up logistics for a date.
I'm talking 2, 3, maybe 4 messages tops.
Save the "getting to know eachother" while you're in person.
Let's say it's Sunday and you successfully get a date for Wednesday or Thursday. (I personally like setting up for those days) Don't even text her until the day of. And honestly she might even text you first depending on her interest level. Don't pencil her in for a weekend right away, as you are a cool guy who already has plans Friday and Saturday (Even if you don't)
If you did your job of initially attracting her when you met her and successfully set up a date then you already know there is at least SOME interest.
If she flakes? Try again in a week.
If she flakes a second time? Next her.
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DonDraper7
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Generally speaking, i set up a date in 4-5 texts. But yeah almost always we text a little the day after setting up the date, she usually initates the convo etc.
To answer your question, if you were texting for a couple of days and you were the one who initated it and she doesn't even initiate the convo once then yeah just next her. I always take that as a sign of disinterest, because otherwise she would initiate at least once.
To answer your question, if you were texting for a couple of days and you were the one who initated it and she doesn't even initiate the convo once then yeah just next her. I always take that as a sign of disinterest, because otherwise she would initiate at least once.
That is all great, but what if we are thousands miles apart and you are looking for a LTR with this particular woman, and you both seem to have much in common?
MrJack
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Ahh bro come on now don't go down that road. Long distance relationship thousands of miles away? I don't see how people can have an LTR/LDR combo.
In the end you aren't really in a relationship you're just long distance texting partners who can't have sex with eachother.
Why limit yourself by being exclusive to a LDR?
Need more information though.. have you actually met this girl in real life and there will be times you guys fly out to see eachother? Or is she someone you just met online with no chance of ever seeing her in person?
If it's the latter don't waste your time, go find a girl who lives somewhat near you.
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I was told about her through a family member, who they met the girl and know her family. Been talking through FB about once a week. I don't want to talk about my feelings or serious stuff through text, afraid of screwing things. Willing to fly, but want to make sure about her interest level first.
The only thing I'm sure is we have a lot in common in terms of hobbies and other general stuff.
MrJack
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I mean you shouldn't have any legit feelings for her at this point so yea definitely don't talk about serious shyt.
If I were you I wouldn't expect anything to become of this at all.
The best thing you could do with this IMO is to just always keep your texts light fun and flirty, and eventually setup a day or weekend to fly out and meet her in person. Set the frame as "she can show you around xxx" (wherever she lives)
Btw are you in the US? What country you guys live in?
Also how old are you guys?
Either way if you want ANY chance of her actually wanting you to fly out you can't just be texting. SHE NEEDS TO HEAR YOUR VOICE.
So phone conversations here and there would be good and maybe some Skype/FaceTime sessions. These type of things will make her much more comfortable with you. (If she likes you of course)
The second most important thing besides attraction is comfort.
I'm just trying to give you the best advice I can with what you're working with here.
But I'll say this again, I don't think this endeavor is worth it at all and highly doubt the outcome you're looking for will come to fruition.
Go find other girls in the meantime.
Best of luck.
Dannyrt34
Master Don Juan
I never liked to see guys follow specific rules on this "no contact" thing. Personally, waiting a certain amount of time never really made any difference.
What you should be doing is only contacting her when you actually have interesting things to say. Nothing worse than constantly texting a girl, you run out of things to say, she quickly becomes bored.
Forget how many days it's been since you last contacted her. Just make sure when you do, you have things to say that sparks her interest. And if you don't have interesting things to say, make your life a bit more interesting so that you do have things to talk about. Good Luck
What you should be doing is only contacting her when you actually have interesting things to say. Nothing worse than constantly texting a girl, you run out of things to say, she quickly becomes bored.
Forget how many days it's been since you last contacted her. Just make sure when you do, you have things to say that sparks her interest. And if you don't have interesting things to say, make your life a bit more interesting so that you do have things to talk about. Good Luck
RangerMIke
Master Don Juan
Forget the term no contact. You should not be ignoring chicks, you should have your attention only on those if give you attention. Don't 'no contact', just keep busy with other women... ones that are not making things hard.
Ask a chick out, if she goes out with you go from there. If she doesn't then she is nothing to you. You can't 'no contact' nothing.
The reason I don't like no contact is that too many PUAs will use that as a means to get a chick back that has gone cold... while that can happen... if a chick likes you, that isn't why you do it. You do it because your attention is elsewhere.
The only way a man will ever get good with women, is if he has the ability to move on without any thought from one chick to the next. You make a play, ask for a date, if she goes out with you try to make sex happen... if she won't go out with you... she is nothing.
Ask a chick out, if she goes out with you go from there. If she doesn't then she is nothing to you. You can't 'no contact' nothing.
The reason I don't like no contact is that too many PUAs will use that as a means to get a chick back that has gone cold... while that can happen... if a chick likes you, that isn't why you do it. You do it because your attention is elsewhere.
The only way a man will ever get good with women, is if he has the ability to move on without any thought from one chick to the next. You make a play, ask for a date, if she goes out with you try to make sex happen... if she won't go out with you... she is nothing.
