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Pros and cons of asking a classmate out for drinks

holidayad_

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Hey all,

I'm in a dilemma as to whether or not to ask this girl I'm studying with during my Master's for a few drinks.

We're doing some projects together and we've talked about a few things. We have some synergy.

However, she also has some friends who I could potentially invite to have a drink with me sometime.

The question is: if I call her, obviously her friends will know.

So, is it worth it? 1 > 0, right?
 

SW15

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You could do what @The Duke said and it makes sense. I have a bigger picture question:

Why are you asking out women studying for an advanced degree? Women with lower levels of education are often more feminine and better partners. If you're on campus, try to get with some undergrad student.
 

holidayad_

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Why are you asking out women studying for an advanced degree? Women with lower levels of education are often more feminine and better partners. If you're on campus, try to get with some undergrad student.
Cold approaching on a university campus in Europe is definitely a thing to be avoided. No man who lives here feels "safe" to do this. You can imagine why.
 

Beowolf

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Dealing right now with the radioactive fall-out from other dudes and chicks in their group who are jealous. Some chicks cannot tolerate rejection, especially after continually showing high interest, while patiently waiting for their turn. The dudes have been trying, with little success, to get with them, have ganged up on me, in order to protect the other women I've rejected . Do not pump and dump, and/or reject their friends.
 

Divorced w 3

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There are only pros. It’s not work, and in five years you won’t ever talk again. Go and don’t think twice.
 

SW15

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Cold approaching on a university campus in Europe is definitely a thing to be avoided. No man who lives here feels "safe" to do this. You can imagine why.
European college campuses seem to have a different vibe than campuses in the United States.

In my time on campus, I didn't hear of one case of a random, outdoor on campus approach leading to multiple dates or a relationship. There might have been an approach or two in my university's student union that lead to something longer term, but I wasn't aware of it or simply don't recall it now.

I do recall some longer term relationships forming from being in the same dorm, being in the same academic classes, and even the same extracurricular clubs.

The people who played the mating game best in college fell into 2-3 groups, all involving LTRs
  • Greek Life people who found other Greek Life people for extended relationships
  • Non-Greek Life people (mainly) who focused on activities and met someone for an extended relationship through some extracurricular activity or in one of their classes. This is more common way of forming LTRs in college.
  • Greek or Non-Greek people who met someone in classes, activities, or some other method and had an LTR with them
 

BoostedArrow

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European college campuses seem to have a different vibe than campuses in the United States.

In my time on campus, I didn't hear of one case of a random, outdoor on campus approach leading to multiple dates or a relationship. There might have been an approach or two in my university's student union that lead to something longer term, but I wasn't aware of it or simply don't recall it now.

I do recall some longer term relationships forming from being in the same dorm, being in the same academic classes, and even the same extracurricular clubs.

The people who played the mating game best in college fell into 2-3 groups, all involving LTRs
  • Greek Life people who found other Greek Life people for extended relationships
  • Non-Greek Life people (mainly) who focused on activities and met someone for an extended relationship through some extracurricular activity or in one of their classes. This is more common way of forming LTRs in college.
  • Greek or Non-Greek people who met someone in classes, activities, or some other method and had an LTR with them
CA isn't really a thing in europe. Maybe in bigger cities, but I've personally never seen anyone doing it nor seen "opportunities" to do it. When I was in NYC on vacation I saw way more opportunities to chat girls up.

Also our campuses aren't that party and alcohol fueled, even though we're allowed to drink with 18 (beer and wine even with 16).
I think the whole "mindset" isn't really laid out for that. E.g. you guys glorify your football teams with quarterbacks and let girls shake their asses for them in a motivating dance (cheerleading). You guys glorify masculine competition and reward it with feminine beauty. Sth. like that is unthinkable here.
 

SW15

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CA isn't really a thing in europe. Maybe in bigger cities, but I've personally never seen anyone doing it nor seen "opportunities" to do it.
Nick Krauser and Tom Torero developed the London Daygame Model in London, England. Last I checked, London is in Europe. That is a cold approaching model.

When I was in NYC on vacation I saw way more opportunities to chat girls up.
NYC is more conducive to daygame style approaching than most US cities.

Also our campuses aren't that party and alcohol fueled, even though we're allowed to drink with 18 (beer and wine even with 16).
I think the whole "mindset" isn't really laid out for that. E.g. you guys glorify your football teams with quarterbacks and let girls shake their asses for them in a motivating dance (cheerleading). You guys glorify masculine competition and reward it with feminine beauty. Sth. like that is unthinkable here.
Interesting. The college sex thread that we have is more focused on the college sex environment at USA colleges.
 

CornbreadFed

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If she likes you, she will make things easy and isolate herself with you. If you have to try then it is over.
 
Last edited:

Millard Fillmore

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Hey all,

I'm in a dilemma as to whether or not to ask this girl I'm studying with during my Master's for a few drinks.

We're doing some projects together and we've talked about a few things. We have some synergy.

However, she also has some friends who I could potentially invite to have a drink with me sometime.

The question is: if I call her, obviously her friends will know.

So, is it worth it? 1 > 0, right?
Just do it. Who cares who knows. The master's will fly by and people will go their own way eventually.

Just don't zero in on any one girl - pay attention to who's interested in you too.
 

holidayad_

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Uptade:

Sent her a text today.

Me: Do u drink?
Her: If I drink? hahaha what
Me: After that answer, my suspicions were confirmed*

*My attempt to be a little playful-provocative.

Not the best approach, I know, but at least it allowed me to filter a reaction before an "official invitation". Already nexted her.
 
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