Prenuptial Agreement

[-HPNOTIQ-]

It's summer, and wedding season is in full blast. Many recent threads have discussed marriage, divorce, and prenuptial agreements.

After reading the statistics that the divorce rate is near 58%, it makes me entertain the idea of having a prenuptial agreement when my time comes.

Curious to know if the DJ's out there know any buddies that have gone through with having a pre-nup. Mainly, I was curious to know how the men had convinced their fiances to have one. I'm not a millionaire by any means, but, I have enough finances that I'd like to keep secure in the event of a divorce.

I tossed this question around some social proof girls - they all said the same thing - Guys who want a pre-nup are already conceiving the marriage to fail. Personally, I think that's crap. There's nothing wrong with a man who wants to protect his assets.

Sound off fellas. And to the women on this board, what would your reaction be if your LTR of 3 years proposed to you with a prenuptial agreement stipulation?

 

[flashdance]

Its so easy for a chick to say a prenup is bad... theres nothing in it for her. The solution would be for states to REQUIRE one or have a clause in the marriage cert that addresses the issues of a potential divorce.

That said, I dont know much about it... but I dont think a prenup will help much. I'd bet you'll still have to pay the same amount of child support and alimony, and even if you pay, your ex-wife will still have total control on whether you get to see your own kids or not.

The prenup may just help split up the assets (401K, house, cars, etc).

I'd be curious to hear from guys that have gone through this as well... because if things really are this bad I will never get married or have kids.

Oh and as far as whether or not you should bring up the prenup if your getting married... my opinion is... YES. Your the one expected to do the asking... the least you can do is set the terms.

And lets not get started about the ridiculous ways guys are trying to propose to their future ex-wives... its just too embarrassing. Unless your praying to god stay off your knees guys!

 

[WaterTiger]

I think pre-nups are GREAT! I'd never marry without one. it's not "un-romantic" or "shows a lack of trust" it's a SMART THING TO DO.

If my husband runs off with a 19 year old stripper, you better know he's paying me alimony. But If I get caught boinking a Chippendale's dancer, then he should be able to kick my ass to the curb with nothing but my clothes in a garbage bag. This can all be outlined in in a pre-nup.

It protects your kids if you have any, or plan to have any. As well as any assets you will inherit. Like that coin collection from your Grandpa. He gave that to YOU! Not your spouse!

I think a long talk with a lawyer and your intended spouse will PREVENT many divorces. It clears away that white lace cloud many new brides have in front of their eyes. If she can't discuss a pre-nup with you without flaking, what is she going to be like when you tell her she has to move from LA to Buffalo, NY because that's where your new job is?

Go with a pre-nup!

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

A huge misconception about prenuptial agreements is that they just involve how finances are to be handled after the divorce. Talk about setting yourself up for failure.

I feel that if it is gone about the typical way, you are asking for trouble. Consider the prenuptial as a agreed upon plan or guide for everything effected by marriage. It is discussed and agreed upon prior to any of the problems arising, what a concept.

I suggest that the prenuptial cover child raising and discipline, religion, division of labor, 1,2,5, and 10 year family plans and comparable issues. This can even include which inlaws are visited during which holidays.

It may seem silly to most to plan all of this out before marriage but waiting until after and the sh1t hits the fan and not having a plan will usually steer you toward the typical prenuptial agreement and divorce.

 

[myfriendblu]

Originally posted by -HPNOTIQ-
It's summer, and wedding season is in full blast. Many recent threads have discussed marriage, divorce, and prenuptial agreements.

After reading the statistics that the divorce rate is near 58%, it makes me entertain the idea of having a prenuptial agreement when my time comes.

Curious to know if the DJ's out there know any buddies that have gone through with having a pre-nup. Mainly, I was curious to know how the men had convinced their fiances to have one. I'm not a millionaire by any means, but, I have enough finances that I'd like to keep secure in the event of a divorce.

I tossed this question around some social proof girls - they all said the same thing - Guys who want a pre-nup are already conceiving the marriage to fail. Personally, I think that's crap. There's nothing wrong with a man who wants to protect his assets.

Sound off fellas. And to the women on this board, what would your reaction be if your LTR of 3 years proposed to you with a prenuptial agreement stipulation?

I hearby nominate you as the most intelligent person in seattle. Your a genious and WAY ahead of your time. Getting a pre-nup is the smartest thing you can do. Its Just a saftey neat people. thats all. its not that big of a deal to ask.

On a seperate note, Kobe Bryant, the dumbest person I have seen in a LONG time, did NOT get a pre-nup with that teeny-bopper he stupidly married. Moron

 

[princelydeeds]

Prenup or no prenup she is entitled to at LEAST 50% of everything you make after you get married. If you have kids you're screwed. A good buddy of mine makes 60k per year his wife makes 40k. They have 2 kids together and 1 she had before she met him. They got a divorce. He pays 600+ per month in child support, 500+ for day care, he still has to pay the mortgage on the house, which is 1100+ and he has to maintain insurance for the kids, including the kid thats not his. He said when they went to court the b!tch judge told him to get his clothes, take his car and leave everything else in the house.

Never ever let your wife not work and never pay off her debts. If you do give her money give her cash to cut the paper trail, never establish a record for taking care of all of her needs. If you allow her to not have a job, you will have to maintain her in that lifestyle.

If she wants to get married, I would make her sign a prenup. If not oh well I wouldnt marry her. Protect yourself just in case.

 

[Metaphor]

I would think he had a bad attorney if he's paying insurance for a kid that isn't his.

 

[myfriendblu]

Originally posted by princelydeeds
Prenup or no prenup she is entitled to at LEAST 50% of everything you make after you get married.marry her. .

Not true. You can write a clause in the contract and stipulate agreements in which you see fit.

What i find hilarious, is during all this talk about marriage, all the various female attention whor es on this site (and you know who you are) don't have jack squat to say

 

[Legend]

Lets say...you have everything on your own before you get married.

A huge home, nice car and any other goodies you want. Then you get married....if you get divorced does she still get 50% of you house even if she did'nt put a dime into it?

if she does, Girls have it so easy....

 

[princelydeeds]

Originally posted by myfriendblu
Not true. You can write a clause in the contract and stipulate agreements in which you see fit.

AS my mentor, who is an attorney, told me a prenup is only as good as the lawyer defending it. Most judges, male and female, are sypmathetic to women. Women get the tear in the eye and we feel like have to protect them. If you are married for any length of time most of the clauses in the prenup will void themselves. The stipulations will be voided as your lives and incomes become intertwined. Perhaps the prenup will hold up in court, perhaps it won't. If im not mistaken, and im definitely no legal scholar, If your married for ten years then shes is entitled to half of everything no matter what the prenup says.

Legend, If you have children, she will definitely get the house.

 

[seulaxplaya]

what i would do

this is just hypothetical. i would tell my fiancee look i need for u to sign this pre nup just in case ur not sure ur in love with me and do decide to leave. if she refuses then id say well if u really do love me then well always be together and share everything so what? are thinking that we wont be together later on. something like that. sort of pulled that out of my azz. i do know that in the state of texas what ever each person owns before marriage is theres and wont be divided after divorce.

 

[squirrels]

The way I think about it, if you NEED a pre-nup, she's not the woman you want to marry.

Not saying you SHOULDN'T, if you're not sure whether she's serious or just marrying you for your stuff/being unfaithful.

But then...why are you marrying her?

I dunno...I've never been there. If you don't trust her, or don't trust yourself to evaluate how much you should trust her, then do it...get the pre-nup.

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Re: Re: Prenuptial Agreement

Originally posted by myfriendblu
On a seperate note, Kobe Bryant, the dumbest person I have seen in a LONG time, did NOT get a pre-nup with that teeny-bopper he stupidly married. Moron

Not to go off on a tangent, but in the event he's actually guilty, he probably would have had a clause that voided the prenup if he calls up a 19-year-old hotel employee to his room and rapes her.

Just sayin'.

 

[BobbDobbs]

I married a woman who actually had more captial assets than I did. She seemed to think a pre-nup was a pretty good idea.

 

[myfriendblu]

Originally posted by princelydeeds
If your married for ten years then shes is entitled to half of everything no matter what the prenup says.

Legend, If you have children, she will definitely get the house.

Not quite. The prenup still holds. remember, you can stipulate the contract. the 10 year rule is about alimony, or what i like to call vagina-mony. if your married at least 10 years your obligated to pay vaginamony, but the pre-nup is still valid. WHY there is even such a thing as alimony is beyond me.

 

[-HPNOTIQ-]

Thanks for the input fellas

Blu -
Good points you make regarding prenups. I agree that prenups help avoid the hassel regarding divorce, alimony, child support, etc. About smarts, I just don't wanna get burned bro. Divorce and custody laws in the country f*cking bites for the men. I bet I can ask 50 different men from each of the 50 states who's had a divorce w/o a prenup, and I guarantee all 50 guys got the huge shaft after the divorce.

And yeah, its interesting that most of the fems on this board shy away from this topic (Watertiger not included)

Princelydeeds -
How does a marriage of 10 years+ affect a binding pre-nuptual contract?

BobbDobbs -
You're one of the lucky one's. I'm not the neanderthal type of guy who'd be jealous if my spouse made more money than me. But, I'd be damned if I had to pay her alimony in a divorce if she was making more than me.

Francisco d'Anconia -
I never thought about breaking the prenuptual agreement in 1,2,3 etc year terms like that. I guess it makes sense to always renew the prenup so it protects assets purchased solely by yourself (new car) or jointly (new house).

squirrels -
I used to think exactly like you bro. It used to be all about trust. I used to feel that I didn't need a prenup because if I am marrying this girl, than, I have taken the time to finally find that woman I honestly trust with everything - heart, sole, finances.

But, it seems a bit AFC to think you and your wife will live in forever, til death do you part, with the big house, white picket fence, the 2.3 kids, a dog named Sparky - the whole fantasy seems a bit AFC.

Yeah, I gotta research the whole prenup thing more.

To everyone else -
Thanks for the input. It seems that marriage has to be seen as less romantic, and more business like. Which makes total sense. There isn't much romance during the divorce proceedings when you may end up untimately paying for alimony, mortgage in a house you don't live in, and child support - all when your wife was the one who cheated on you. <-- Read that excerpt in an article in Men's Health Magazine.

 

[myfriendblu]

Originally posted by -HPNOTIQ-
Thanks for the input fellas

Blu -
Good points you make regarding prenups. I agree that prenups help avoid the hassel regarding divorce, alimony, child support, etc. About smarts, I just don't wanna get burned bro. Divorce and custody laws in the country f*cking bites for the men. I bet I can ask 50 different men from each of the 50 states who's had a divorce w/o a prenup, and I guarantee all 50 guys got the huge shaft after the divorce.

And yeah, its interesting that most of the fems on this board shy away from this topic (Watertiger not included)

yo bro
Of course you don't wanna get screwed. Your smart Yea LOL most of the attention whor es are shying away from this topic. Oh yea, some may chime in and say "i don't mind a prenup" but you can bet dollars to donuts, that in real life, if a dude asked for a pr-nup they would be shocked.

I take it like this. Some women are honest, some cheat. However, show a marriage contract to ANY FREAKIN LAWYER in the world and they will say its the most unfair contract since we bought manhatten from the indians for 40 bucks of food. In fact throughout the law circles this is often a running joke, that the most common contract signed in this world is also the most unfair.

 

[-HPNOTIQ-]

I again posed this question to 5 female friends last night. And interestingly enough, 2 of the five women understood a man's stance on a prenup. The other 3 thought it would be a slap in the face if a man ever asked that question.

More interesting, of the 2 who agreed on a prenup, both are rather successful and both gross over 72K/year.

The other 3 who disagreed - 2 were still doing their undergrad education, the other 1 was making an average 30k/year.

The more I think about it, the more I feel a marriage without a prenup is like having sex without a condom. Your choice, your risk.

 

[myfriendblu]

Originally posted by -HPNOTIQ-
I again posed this question to 5 female friends last night. And interestingly enough, 2 of the five women understood a man's stance on a prenup. The other 3 thought it would be a slap in the face if a man ever asked that question.

More interesting, of the 2 who agreed on a prenup, both are rather successful and both gross over 72K/year.

The other 3 who disagreed - 2 were still doing their undergrad education, the other 1 was making an average 30k/year.

The more I think about it, the more I feel a marriage without a prenup is like having sex without a condom. Your choice, your risk.

LOL, what do you expect from a bunch of hypocritical females. The rich ones want a pre-nup, the poor ones don't. Figures.

 

[STR8UP]

Hey, I'm all for being fair and all, but the way men get screwed when a marriage ends is terrible.

I have one friend who is in a commercial real estate mogul who is entwined in a bitter divorce where his wife is using his kids like chess pieces.

She had nothing when he married her, now she's gonna have a multilillionaire sponsor while she cruises the Carribbean and gets freaky with the pool boy.

You can take the b!tch out of the trailer park, but you can't take the trailerpark out of the b!tch.

Another friend of mine was a bit smarter. Instead of holding all of his net worth in real estate in the US, he has about 2 mil stashed somewhere in the islands. Basically untouchable...

Me, all I have to do is use the fact that I have business partners as an excuse to pitch a prenup, should I decide to do the deed. It could REALLY fukk things up for other people if an ex wife were to get partial ownership of a business, and she will have to understand this or it ain't happening.