Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Plenty of Fish - nothing hurts your confidence more...

r0cky

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SoldMySoul said:
You are absolutely right and that illustrates my point. If you are looking for substance... more than likely she is not it. She wants the attention, not a date or boyfriend.
Even average a$$ looking women with well thought of profiles will get tons of messages. Win win for them.
You guys actually pay attention to their profiles? I never do until after they reply, and even then its just to find something to pick on. Its all bullsh.t anyways, they only describe what they see themselves as which is extremely biased in most cases.
 

DonGorgon

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there are always more men out looking fro mates and sex than women so women are in higher demand and hence have the upper hand in these situations and many males are becoming more and more desperate resorting to prostitutes and bisexuality to get their sexual needs met...
 

The Greek

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DonGorgon said:
there are always more men out looking fro mates and sex than women so women are in higher demand and hence have the upper hand in these situations and many males are becoming more and more desperate resorting to prostitutes and bisexuality to get their sexual needs met...
I have ugly female friends (UGLY - FAT) who get loads of messages on these websites. Whatever truth there might be to your theory, it's MAGNIFIED ONLINE.

RL game is better for most of us.
 

Kerpal

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Scion said:
she doesn't need to fill out anything to have dozens (if not hundreds) of guys messaging her. That's the reality of online dating, there are always 2-3 times more guys than girls.
Just like real life...
 

Scion

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Kerpal said:
Just like real life...
nah, in real life most average guys are either too afraid to talk to women or they don't know how to. That kinda levels the field a bit.
 

kangyu

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He is clear in what He asks and clear in what He offers. The choice is up tous.Isn't it incredible that NY Escort God leaves the choice up to us? Think about it. There are many things in life we can't choose. We can't, for NY Escorts example, choose the weather. We can't control the economy.We can't choose whether or not we are NY Asian Escorts born with a big nose or blue eyes or a lot hair. We can't even choose how people respond to us. But we NY Asian Escort can choose where we spend eternity.
 

Dust 2 Dust

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I have a profile on there, but I've given up contacting women through it. It seems like a waste of time to send out 50-60 messages and have 99% of them "read and deleted." In my zip code there is an 8 to 1 ratio of men to women on that site so 80% of guys on there will get no play based on pure numbers alone. POF is a great example of the 80/20 rule in action. 20% of men score all the ladies while the other 80% get nothing. Typically women will look at your pics first. If she doesn't dig your photos she'll delete your email without even opening it. Average looking guys have little chance of any success with it.

My personal experience is that most women on there are either way too picky or are just on there attention whoring.
 

V2Logger

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I agree plenty of AWs on there. They just like to be wanted and like the attention they may not get during the day or at home. Who knows.

I have had some luck, but recently deleted my profile. I have gone on out a few times from girls on there. One I was with for 2 months or so, but I ended up right back on there again to find another.

Right now I am just laying off because I got tired of writing messages and the like. Gonna lay off it for awhile, I started seeing the same people there over and over agin.
 

speakeasy

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The thing with plenty of fish is that it takes NO investment whatsoever since it's free. So a lot of girls throw their profiles up there and just do it for attention. Even my own sister put a profile up once and said she had no intention of dating any of these guys, she just wanted to "see what kind of guy I could get." So she was doing nothing but trying to inflate her ego and feel validation and nothing more.

If you are going to go the online route and take it serious, probably best to look into a SERIOUS site where people aren't allowed to put up free profiles. That way, you KNOW any woman that's on there is serious since she's invested her own money. Having a pay system screens out a lot of the flakes like my sister just looking for validation.

As for the race thing, Ok Cupid did a very interesting study on this issue:

http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/2009/10/05/your-race-affects-whether-people-write-you-back/

Black people get pretty low response rates, but the thing is, men get low response rates across the board. Even white guys only get a response of 29%, compared with just under 22% of black men. The average reply rate of women to ALL men is only just over 27%, whereas 42% of men respond to women's contacts. This is of course just one site, I suspect on some other sites like POF which are filled with attention wh0res, female response rates are even lower.

Finding girls online is cool, I know guys that have found some really awesome girls online, and one of my best friends met his wife on match.com and they now have a house, a kid and another on the way. So if it works for you, it works for you. If you aren't getting good results, try changing the profile pic, the writing, show it some people to get feedback. If it still doesn't work, then forget it. Move on and learn face-to-face game. Online dating just isn't everyone's niche.
 

snowdog

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Special T said:
than when you see your message status as "Unread Deleted" or "Read Deleted".

I'm just sending out tons of emails all saying the same thing looking for those couple chicks that are feeling me. I'm not tailoring an email to one specific girl because I tried that and it's a waste of time.

I know looks wise I'm not going to get many responses as I'm not a hot buff dude in a pic with a sexy b*tch. Girls online are waayyyy more shallower so they're looking for specific race and body type. Since I'm black messaging whites and asians...my success rate will probably be 2%...LOL.
What are you doing on the internet trying to meet chicks? Get the f*ck out of your house and into some bars, you wussy.
 

Poonani Maker

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speakeasy said:
Finding girls online is cool, I know guys that have found some really awesome girls online, and one of my best friends met his wife on match.com and they now have a house, a kid and another on the way. So if it works for you, it works for you. If you aren't getting good results, try changing the profile pic, the writing, show it some people to get feedback. If it still doesn't work, then forget it. Move on and learn face-to-face game. Online dating just isn't everyone's niche.
I agree with this. A co-worker/friend of mine found his wife online. I attended his funeral, I mean wedding. They've already had one baby, more to come. She was NOT that good-looking (short toady), but to each his own.
 

Kailex

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Yep, I've lobbied for online dating as a past, but always as a side dish. Face to face interaction and gaming is always the main course.

I've gone out with plenty of women in the past from doing both or also involving social circles as well.

The pay sites weed out the validation-seeking women who just want their ego to be massaged ever so gently. I've had good and bad dates through online dating, no different than the real world dating. Fortunately though, right now my main plate is from Match.com and has turned out really well. But I also do have some horror stories from those places.

But Plenty of Fish needs to get renamed for men to Plenty of Lowered Expectations.
 

tinctrar

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To be honest I dont agree with online dating. Plain and simple reasons to follow. My good friend is into this right now - and im trying to get him away from it because he is unsuccesful and its hurting him.

Online dating doesnt allow you to have that initial spark - allowing you to use your most improtant asset in meeting women - charm. The way you play yourself off in person is crucial to success.

Also - online dating allows people easy access to larger pools of possible candidates. However, because it is easier it also makes it easier for people to allow this carry over into the dynamic of the relationship. For example - if it was so easy to meet this guy on the net bla bla bla then it would be just as easy for her to say see ya. This is if you are looking for an LTR - which most online dating websites emphasize and most women play that card. If you arent looking for an LTR then I agree that coffee shops, museums, bars, colleges (If your still young enough to pull it off) are much better pools for candidates.

Finally, how the hell do you know that the person on the other end is real? Say you go to meet up with them and they are totally different? (In my friends case the girl was quite large and unattractive) So why chance it? Hone your skills and get out there. Trust me.
 

Poonani Maker

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My most recent meeting with one WAS real. She was everything she stated in her profile, BUT she was Asian; therefore, not westernized. She was truthful in every way as far as I could gather.

However, as of late, I've noticed a surge in female profiles on POF. I believe that the economy, AND the f'd up social bassackwards situation we all find ourselves in is responsible. Women are logging on to come home to pappa, but I ain't payin for sh!t. They can fvckin forget that. I'm getting messaged now whereas I used to never get solicited. Sure most of them fat or older, desperate, but the ones I message are responding for the most part, and there seems to be a never-ending pool of new women to come along, ones I've never seen. If one starts playing games or sh!t-testing me i.e. trying to set the frame as I'm a veteran online dater, then I just delete her message and move on to another. Fvck em.
 

speakeasy

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tinctrar said:
If you arent looking for an LTR then I agree that coffee shops, museums, bars, colleges (If your still young enough to pull it off) are much better pools for candidates.
There's that adult friend finder site for people just doing the casual thing and not LTR.
 

PappyS

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Here's a something that someone posted on the internet, which I think basically sums up a lot of the online dating:

women on pof and other online dating sites are not picky ,they just play picky.the reason for that is because they get no attention from men in real life,but get lots on pof.i know this because i have dated quite a few women from that site and they all said the same thing,which is that as soon they posted a profile on line ,they received at least 10 responses,if not more, within 1st 2 hours.btw these women are by no means attractive,they are just average,or ****abale at best,but since they spend most of their time in cyber space[which is a fantasy land for the most part]they develop these fantastic and outrageous set of requirements that have no basis whatsoever in the real world.

Basically I've gotten a lot more attention from attractive women in real life then I've gotten from less attractive women online. The internet is a place where women who don't get attention in real life can go to boost their egos in cyber fantasy land. That is why internet dating is usually a waste of time, and real life is much better. The other thing is in real life you have more of a chance to make a pitch. On the internet a lot of them won't even respond.
 

Nexus Polaris

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^ So true.


Online dating is useless. It's so much easier to get a positive response from those very same women if you approach them in person.

POF is the worst, though. It's like fishing in a septic tank. Most of the people there are single for a reason. They don't have much going for them. They're mostly the people you wouldn't approach if you saw them in real life anyway (i.e. single moms, fat girls, b*tches, women over 40).

Why are you basing your self esteem on whether or not women are responding to you, though? That's very AFC.
 

mv.89

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This is old thread but damn! lol I thought I was the only one facing challenges but can't believe. There were so many instances in which I felt that the girl was just here to inflate her ego but now I am sure lol
 

Ronaldo7

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You people really need to toughen up and stop being so sensitive if they are shallow or not.

We all know that women are all about looks. They only care whether you are fit or not. If you aren't fit and you want them to look at you, you should work on yourself. It is as simple as that. Don't be like that white dude that started crying about POF and the girls not looking at a "nice guy like him". If you aren't fit/good-looking/what women want, you should aim for your league, not a higher ground that isn't meant for you. Always be realistic, not idealistic.

- The streets is still the best place to go look. However, online dating does show some fine hoes that you may not see sometimes. -
 
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