Playing the online dating game, what first message to write?

smutu

Banned
Joined
Aug 3, 2016
Messages
6
Reaction score
0
Age
31
This works for me. I get plenty of dates with this approach.

Hey xxx whats up?
Your profile caught my eye and I would like to meet you.
We could message endlessly or just meet for drinks.
What is your schedule like this week?

Dustmuffin

Send this message to 5 women. Wait a day for responses. No takers? Send it out to 5 more. It's a game of numbers. I get as many dates as I want with this approach. Last week I had 4 dates. This week I have dates for fri and sat with repeat girls I met on match. I have had sex with one and Im positive I will f uck the other. She has agreed to meet me at my house and we will drive together for the date. If you get them to your house its a good sign that they are DTF. I also have one tomorrow and had two flakes. I have two other girls I could ask out that are repeats for sure sex. Im dropping them because I am tired of them.

I use match, tinder and bumble. I have very good success with match. Ask for the date straight away.
wassup works beter
 

xstang77

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 17, 2016
Messages
298
Reaction score
116
Age
32
Tried all those lines no go,guess it's just a matter of luck and your area,like I've said before a lot of girls on there are like 28 with 3 different baby daddy's and still act to good for you,half the girls on there are just trying to seek attention daddy never gave them then as soon as you mention meeting up instead of a dead end convo there not interested,this is the case in my area atleast.
 

dustmuffin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 21, 2015
Messages
2,518
Reaction score
1,435
Age
60
Tried all those lines no go,guess it's just a matter of luck and your area,like I've said before a lot of girls on there are like 28 with 3 different baby daddy's and still act to good for you,half the girls on there are just trying to seek attention daddy never gave them then as soon as you mention meeting up instead of a dead end convo there not interested,this is the case in my area atleast.
Daddy issues can be fun. You have to be very dominant. Spank them if they give you s hit. Sit them in the corner. They will test you always. You have to be on top of your game. I dated a girl with daddy issues and it was the best sex of my life. I did any and everything to her and she loved it. It isn't for the faint of heart. If you are up to it it will be one exciting ride. She will drain you emotionally if you let her. Just remember you have to be more than alpha.....you have to be daddy......
 

xstang77

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 17, 2016
Messages
298
Reaction score
116
Age
32
Daddy issues can be fun. You have to be very dominant. Spank them if they give you s hit. Sit them in the corner. They will test you always. You have to be on top of your game. I dated a girl with daddy issues and it was the best sex of my life. I did any and everything to her and she loved it. It isn't for the faint of heart. If you are up to it it will be one exciting ride. She will drain you emotionally if you let her. Just remember you have to be more than alpha.....you have to be daddy......
If they would take bait on those sites I would, as per your suggestion,I did what you mentioned to a girl with mommy issues,got 4.5 good years from her before she turned into a total slut and is now back to living at daddy's house with her kid and new husband that's so great that she had to call me to fix his truck even though we've been split for almost 3 years lmao. Thinking back I think narcissistic tendencies I used to have kept that r/s going so long,though my recent bpd ex killed all my traits of it lol. Anyways don't mean to sidetrack the thread.
 

Glassguy

Moderator
Joined
Apr 25, 2016
Messages
4,673
Reaction score
8,559
Age
46
I would say my response rate to the messages I send is 60-70% on POF. The only problem I run into is some of them act like a grenade just went off in their a$$ when I tell them we need to meet up, if I didnt already mention it in my first message.

Had a solid HB8.5 that was asking me dozens of questions and texting me every 15 minutes (got her # and got her off Match in 3 messages).

Then I told her that we needed to meet up for a drink to get to know each other and she responded with "maybe next Sunday, I am busy this weekend".

I told her that I am not looking for a pen pal and I prefer to get to know someone in person. She says "I prefer friendship first and see if it turns into something later".

Me: "I already have to many friends only in my busy life to keep up with as it is and I am on Match to meet potential dates, not friends only......maybe we can meet up later down the road. Good luck". It was almost like it shocked her.

Now I have done this several times before and normally within a week they are messaging me back "when are you free for those drinks?". Maybe this one will and maybe she wont, but there are other lines in the water and I refuse to feed the attention wh0res.

You have to remember one important thing about online dating- many more women than men, and most of these women you're gonna have to close FAST on a date/meet/hookup. They are just watching these messages pour in from BETAs that say "You're beautiful", "can I take you out for a nice dinner sometime", "will you let me text you"....blah blah. Close close close. These women are constantly looking for the better option and when they see that you will walk away, their interest WILL go up with you. It just may be a few days or week before they reach back out. Attention wh0res want what they cant have and they know the orbiters will be giving them attention in the meantime.

If you get resistance just walk away. You can always come back a week or so later and say something like "Hey trouble....ready for that drink yet? Whats your schedule look like this week?"

Give them a chance to close themselves or walk away. Dont waste time. Dont buy into the texting buddy thing. Its working for me as I am smashing one new a week or two and still meeting ones from the last month or so too.....
 

MrOctober

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 27, 2015
Messages
118
Reaction score
39
I would say my response rate to the messages I send is 60-70% on POF. The only problem I run into is some of them act like a grenade just went off in their a$$ when I tell them we need to meet up, if I didnt already mention it in my first message.

Had a solid HB8.5 that was asking me dozens of questions and texting me every 15 minutes (got her # and got her off Match in 3 messages).

Then I told her that we needed to meet up for a drink to get to know each other and she responded with "maybe next Sunday, I am busy this weekend".

I told her that I am not looking for a pen pal and I prefer to get to know someone in person. She says "I prefer friendship first and see if it turns into something later".

Me: "I already have to many friends only in my busy life to keep up with as it is and I am on Match to meet potential dates, not friends only......maybe we can meet up later down the road. Good luck". It was almost like it shocked her.

Now I have done this several times before and normally within a week they are messaging me back "when are you free for those drinks?". Maybe this one will and maybe she wont, but there are other lines in the water and I refuse to feed the attention wh0res.

You have to remember one important thing about online dating- many more women than men, and most of these women you're gonna have to close FAST on a date/meet/hookup. They are just watching these messages pour in from BETAs that say "You're beautiful", "can I take you out for a nice dinner sometime", "will you let me text you"....blah blah. Close close close. These women are constantly looking for the better option and when they see that you will walk away, their interest WILL go up with you. It just may be a few days or week before they reach back out. Attention wh0res want what they cant have and they know the orbiters will be giving them attention in the meantime.

If you get resistance just walk away. You can always come back a week or so later and say something like "Hey trouble....ready for that drink yet? Whats your schedule look like this week?"

Give them a chance to close themselves or walk away. Dont waste time. Dont buy into the texting buddy thing. Its working for me as I am smashing one new a week or two and still meeting ones from the last month or so too.....
yea I agree. I can see half these dudes validating them and showering them with compliments first convo. bad way to go itll never happen.
 

Glassguy

Moderator
Joined
Apr 25, 2016
Messages
4,673
Reaction score
8,559
Age
46
Yep. They don't accept my offer for drinks or counter offer, fvck them. They will either reconsider and come back or they won't.


These chicks, for the most part, think they are hotter than they are because most guys online message ALL of them.....especially the 6s and 7s. So they get so much attention they think they are princesses. Guys that would never hit on them in a bar do so online and these chicks are living beyond their means so to speak.
 

xstang77

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 17, 2016
Messages
298
Reaction score
116
Age
32
As a side note, be carful of the women that do respond on these sights...it's nicknamed plenty of freaks for a reason and guess where I met my bpd ex..
 

MrOctober

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 27, 2015
Messages
118
Reaction score
39
As a side note, be carful of the women that do respond on these sights...it's nicknamed plenty of freaks for a reason and guess where I met my bpd ex..
Yea bro. Had one off okc I banged on a second date. I smelled bpd from a mile away. Chick purposely left her bra at my house. I flake on her next meetup because she was blowing up my phone. Girl showed up at my apartment the next day damn near breaking the door down for her bra. Be careful lol
 

xstang77

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 17, 2016
Messages
298
Reaction score
116
Age
32
Yea bro. Had one off okc I banged on a second date. I smelled bpd from a mile away. Chick purposely left her bra at my house. I flake on her next meetup because she was blowing up my phone. Girl showed up at my apartment the next day damn near breaking the door down for her bra. Be careful lol
Yea mine flaked our first date then the games began,mind you I'd been trying the sites without much luck for almost a year then I stumble upon my ex...man I should have blocked her ass and ran, then her reason for being on there was that "she was spying/keeping tabs on her best friends bf for cheating" lol she was probably banging her ex and looking for a new replacement (me) on that site,just like she eventually did to me.
 

EyeBRollin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 18, 2015
Messages
10,786
Reaction score
8,761
Age
35
It's a numbers game. Don't overthink.

"Hey how are you"

I send the same message to every woman I consider ****able. Exactly like that. Here's a few of my closes:

Tinder
M: Hey how are you
HB: Hey I'm Well
HB: How are you?
M: I'm well, at the Dr. Office. Where are you from?
HB: <hometown> originally
HB: Where are you from?
M: <hometown>. I live in <state> now. <username> is your real name?
HB: Haha no.
HB: My name is <name>
HB: I'm in med school applying to residencies right now so I have a nickname up
HB: How's your day going?
M: Nice to meet you <name>. Let's have a phone conversation. <phone number>

She texts me about 6 hours later.

HB: Hey EyeBRollin, this is <name> from tinder
M: Hey <name>, gotchu :)

I call her 48 hours later. We talk for 8 minutes. I tell her we're going to meet up for drinks, but my schedule is hectic but I'll be in touch. (I use the same formula for all of them. They receive a text in 5-9 days with a time and location)

POF

M: Hey how are you
HB: Hey I'm good. You?
M: Good, getting ready for bed. What do you do for work?
HB (the next day) I'm a business consultant. You? Good morning how are you?
Me: I'm <occupation>. Business consultant sounds interesting. I'd like to hear about it. Drinks?
HB: Sure.
M: When are you free?
HB: After 6 pm
M: I mean what day work best for you?
HB: I'm available after 6, Wednesday through Saturday and I'm off Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday
HB: I need to chat with you via phone before I meet you in person
M: Call me. <phone number - name>

We talked for 6 minutes. I got busy and had to go, but told her I would check my schedule and let her know. Followed the script and texted her 5 days later. She accepted and showed up early.

POF2

M: Hey how are you
HB: I'm doing well. What about yourself?
M: Getting ready for work. You're a CPA?
HB: Working on that currently! What line of work do you do?
M: <occupation> Familiar with it?
HB: Yes, I took a course on it in college
M: Nice, what's your name?
HB: <name>. What is yours?
M: <name>. Nice to meet you. <number> shoot me a text we'll have a phone conversation.

She texts 2 hours later. I shoot the usual ping text back. Wait two days to call her and did the usual 5-10 minute conversation.

I follow the same principles in all my online dating:

-Don't read her profile. You don't have time for that ****. It doesn't help you, honestly.

-Only use periods and question marks for punctuation. Be meticulous with your question marks (they prompt a response when used correctly). Periods separate thoughts.

-I always leave her my number in 5 messages or less and give her an order to contact me. This is a compliance test (me screening her). Women who respond to your messages have some interest. Women that respond but don't text you have very lukewarm interest. They typically have 900 messages and have you pegged as an potential orbiter. Don't ****ing bother.

Following this script has reduced my flake ratio substantially. Don't ask for her number. I also backed away from asking for a date right away for three reasons:
1) You aren't screening out the lukewarm golddiggers that want free booze
2) Less rapport leads to more flakes
3) Patience, patience, patience. Get her to start thinking and chasing you.

I'm working on a few more challenging prospects right now. Will report back.
 

dustmuffin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 21, 2015
Messages
2,518
Reaction score
1,435
Age
60
I had a date last night with **** close. She told me that she liked my direct approach of asking for the date immediately. She said she had texted for a month with guys who wouldn't ask for the date and didn't like it. I have heard this from numerous girls.. I had a date last nigh f uck close. A date tonight that I m very positive about a f uck close. Then a date sunday with a for sure f uck close.

The point of this is dont waste time. Ask her out. If she wants to text endlessly then move along. Don't let her pull you into her frame. Your time and attention is valuable.
 

marmel75

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 4, 2012
Messages
7,232
Reaction score
5,637
It's a numbers game. Don't overthink.

"Hey how are you"

I send the same message to every woman I consider ****able. Exactly like that. Here's a few of my closes:

Tinder
M: Hey how are you
HB: Hey I'm Well
HB: How are you?
M: I'm well, at the Dr. Office. Where are you from?
HB: <hometown> originally
HB: Where are you from?
M: <hometown>. I live in <state> now. <username> is your real name?
HB: Haha no.
HB: My name is <name>
HB: I'm in med school applying to residencies right now so I have a nickname up
HB: How's your day going?
M: Nice to meet you <name>. Let's have a phone conversation. <phone number>

She texts me about 6 hours later.

HB: Hey EyeBRollin, this is <name> from tinder
M: Hey <name>, gotchu :)

I call her 48 hours later. We talk for 8 minutes. I tell her we're going to meet up for drinks, but my schedule is hectic but I'll be in touch. (I use the same formula for all of them. They receive a text in 5-9 days with a time and location)

POF

M: Hey how are you
HB: Hey I'm good. You?
M: Good, getting ready for bed. What do you do for work?
HB (the next day) I'm a business consultant. You? Good morning how are you?
Me: I'm <occupation>. Business consultant sounds interesting. I'd like to hear about it. Drinks?
HB: Sure.
M: When are you free?
HB: After 6 pm
M: I mean what day work best for you?
HB: I'm available after 6, Wednesday through Saturday and I'm off Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday
HB: I need to chat with you via phone before I meet you in person
M: Call me. <phone number - name>

We talked for 6 minutes. I got busy and had to go, but told her I would check my schedule and let her know. Followed the script and texted her 5 days later. She accepted and showed up early.

POF2

M: Hey how are you
HB: I'm doing well. What about yourself?
M: Getting ready for work. You're a CPA?
HB: Working on that currently! What line of work do you do?
M: <occupation> Familiar with it?
HB: Yes, I took a course on it in college
M: Nice, what's your name?
HB: <name>. What is yours?
M: <name>. Nice to meet you. <number> shoot me a text we'll have a phone conversation.

She texts 2 hours later. I shoot the usual ping text back. Wait two days to call her and did the usual 5-10 minute conversation.

I follow the same principles in all my online dating:

-Don't read her profile. You don't have time for that ****. It doesn't help you, honestly.

-Only use periods and question marks for punctuation. Be meticulous with your question marks (they prompt a response when used correctly). Periods separate thoughts.

-I always leave her my number in 5 messages or less and give her an order to contact me. This is a compliance test (me screening her). Women who respond to your messages have some interest. Women that respond but don't text you have very lukewarm interest. They typically have 900 messages and have you pegged as an potential orbiter. Don't ****ing bother.

Following this script has reduced my flake ratio substantially. Don't ask for her number. I also backed away from asking for a date right away for three reasons:
1) You aren't screening out the lukewarm golddiggers that want free booze
2) Less rapport leads to more flakes
3) Patience, patience, patience. Get her to start thinking and chasing you.

I'm working on a few more challenging prospects right now. Will report back.
Im not big on asking about their jobs...they get plenty of that from these other lame ass dudes out there.
 

xstang77

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 17, 2016
Messages
298
Reaction score
116
Age
32
I messaged one my number and she actually messaged me..seems like a decent girl,about an hour and a half away though so we'll see where it goes.
 

ubercat

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 6, 2015
Messages
3,856
Reaction score
2,426
Location
Australia
I prefer asking them out front. Then I give them my number if they are making Xtra Comfort noises. Of course OLD is full of low quality woman so it's really mainly for practice. I.e. getting dates and ***** not girlfriends. If you're spending more than 4 hours a week on the site then your real life is suffering. And that is assuming you've done the right thing and substituted OLD for television.
 

dustmuffin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 21, 2015
Messages
2,518
Reaction score
1,435
Age
60
I had a date last night with **** close. She told me that she liked my direct approach of asking for the date immediately. She said she had texted for a month with guys who wouldn't ask for the date and didn't like it. I have heard this from numerous girls.. I had a date last nigh f uck close. A date tonight that I m very positive about a f uck close. Then a date sunday with a for sure f uck close.

The point of this is dont waste time. Ask her out. If she wants to text endlessly then move along. Don't let her pull you into her frame. Your time and attention is valuable.
I had sex with the second woman.....came in her ass....two dates two ****e closes.....tomorrow will make three...This third one is in love with me and Im trying to get rid of her.......All three were gotten on OLD.....get busy guys you can do the same...
 

MrOctober

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 27, 2015
Messages
118
Reaction score
39
Some need a little more extra rapport then others.

I've had a higher success rate with the extra rapports ironically.
 

Jetleg

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 24, 2014
Messages
318
Reaction score
212
EyeB summed it up pretty good.

It doesnt matter what you text, just dont say "hey" or something really boring, it all comes to how good your photos are.
If you are a model, even if you'll write her "i wanna c*m all over your face" chances are she will still answer.

I also find that sending a question is far less sucessful than just saying some random sh1t, never give complements.

I'd go for a "mean" comment, nothing too mean but just enough to insult her enough so that she will answer.
 
Last edited:
Top