Pissed off husband from private flirting on Facebook.

[muscleman]

At this point, I would say ignore since you made the mistake of apologizing.

A guy calling you out for PMing his gf/wife is perfectly normal, that's standard mate guarding, but it's usually 'stop talking to my girl' or something similar. 'See you soon' is over the top. Since you already apologized there's no backtracking, just drop it and if this continues call the police,

BUT for next time, after you got the first message I would have called his bluff, something to the tune of:

'Oh look a documented threat. You'll be seeing the police soon too.' And leave it at that.

I have a little respect for a dude doing normal mate guarding (though if he was really all that to her he wouldn't have to in the first place), but if you take it that far you need to stick up for yourself - which you didn't. It's ok, maybe next time.

 

[scrouds]

Now is a good time to get some friends if you don't have any. Smith and Wesson, Ruger, Kimber, Glock, all come to mind, and many more

 

[Peaks&Valleys]

He aint going to do sh1t. #1, if this guy really is hoodlum he's not going to risk going back to jail because of some dude flirting with his girlfriend. #2 you weren't the only one she was flirting with. Did you see if you were included in a mass message? You probably weren't the only one he sent that message to. #3 anyone insecure enough to make his girl delete her FB page because she's flirting with guys...and still stays with her after all of it...is a straight up pu$$y. Guarantee you she got the brunt end of his wrath.

Hind sight is 20/20 but if I were you I would have told him to GFY.

Anyways, if it's still bothering you then you can always call over the sheriff or police. Show them the message and they'll run a report on him and/or go have a chat with the guy.

I might respond to the guy. "What's that supposed to mean? Is that a threat?" That could have been a knee jerk reaction on his part and now he's cooled down. Maybe if you show some action he might apologize to you.

 

[3countriesPlan]

Protect yourself -- get some mace at least and stay vigilant not cause you are scared but cause losers have nothing to lose. Then, keep records of all the correspondance you have with him and her if you can keep it. Then if you are really on top of the game you can make a call to your lawyer and ask what you should do that would benefit you in a court of law if anything were to pop off.

 

[AmIAFC]

Protect yourself -- get some mace at least and stay vigilant not cause you are scared but cause losers have nothing to lose. Then, keep records of all the correspondance you have with him and her if you can keep it. Then if you are really on top of the game you can make a call to your lawyer and ask what you should do that would benefit you in a court of law if anything were to pop off.

Yeah, at least be prepared in the event something happens, which I doubt.

Pu55y does strange things to men. I've seen it turn a passive, AFC into something resembling a wild savage from the lost tribe of shabaz. Some men lose all sense of reason, restraint, and civility as a result of it. They get this absurd notion in their heads that their entire manhood or even natural existence are subjectively tested through it, and something as relatively trivial as the law is hardly enough of a consideration to curtail this notion from their minds.

 

[rhinostarr]

AMIAFC, I've got to tell you, I've learned a lesson from this, first being to leave married women alone. Thing is, I really didn't give a sh**T about this woman, it was just me being bored and flirting with a pretty woman, if she rebuffed me and didn't reply to any of my messages, I would've stopped and moved on...anyway, lesson learned..

 

[Aristippus]

First of all, you should never flirt with married women, even if there was a zero percent chance of this type of situation happening. It's not right and married women are too much drama. Second, call the police and make a complaint against the guy for issuing threats. Keep records of it. For 2 reasons. If he ever decided to pursue you and try to harm you, you have a paper trail. If you were forced to injure him badly or use lethal force in self-defense, you have a paper trail to cover yourself. You could say you feared for your life and that's why you used lethal force, and you'd have it on record to back you up.

Nothing may come of it, but cover yourself just in case. Usually starting a paper trail can be a deterrent. The mistake many people make is not reporting threats to the police. In the case of someone who intends to make good on his threats, this simply emboldens him and puts the person who is threatened in a position of weakness. The person feels isolated and like the police won't do anything about it. You don't have to wait until something happens. Issuing threats is enough, and if a person sees that there are consequences for the issuing of threats, usually that in itself could be a deterrent that will diffuse the situation.

Better to err on the side of caution and use your tax dollars to put some pressure on this guy and to cover yourself. The other thing is, in a situation of self-defense, lawyers will try to twist things to seem like the would-be victim who injured or killed the would-be assailant was the aggressor, when in fact, he was an unwilling participant who was given no choice and had to put an end to his attacker. Another reason why the paper trail is important. If nothing happens, no harm done. If something does, a paper trail could be your ally. Without the paper trail, if something happened, you might regret not having some evidence to back up that you were defending yourself against someone who threatened you.

 

[Pair A Dice]

Get fitted for a casket.

All joking aside, you should have backed off when you found out she was married.

 

[scrouds]

You didn't do anything wrong flirting with a married chick, don't let any of the manginas convince you that you crossed a line. She crossed it, not you.

 

[Down Low]

Hmm. Which one sounds correct?

you should never flirt with married women . . . . It's not right...

You didn't do anything wrong flirting with a married chick

Scrouds, do you understand why Aristippus wins hands down? Because you recognize that there's a question of moral right and wrong, and phrase your response in a defensive manner -- you understand that your position will be strongly attacked. OTOH, Aristippus proffers the rule without hesitation or doubt. Even if I had no moral compass, I'd recognize the difference between someone talking from a position of strength, and one of weakness.

 

[Burroughs]

I think in 2013 the sad fact is marriage is thought of as little more than long term dating to most women

90% of the married women I know flirt with me...especially if their husbands are broke or underemployed which is most men nowadays...women are always looking for the bigger better deal and a simple thing like a marriage contract won't stop them...you make 80K more than hubby...she'll let you tap that azz

but as a man it is best to avoid such moral quagmires (giggedy) and keep your nose clean as most men who marry these days are more than likely faggot manginas to begin with.

 

[zekko]

I've found that most married women will flirt a bit, and I have several married male friends who are huge shameless over the top flirts including overtly sexual remarks. Rollo has recommended flirting while you are married, and especially in front of your wife.

I don't think a little harmless flirting is a bad thing, for either gender, but there is definitely a line you don't cross. Whether or not the OP crossed that line is difficult to say since we don't have all the details.

 

[scrouds]

Hmm. Which one sounds correct?





Scrouds, do you understand why Aristippus wins hands down? Because you recognize that there's a question of moral right and wrong, and phrase your response in a defensive manner -- you understand that your position will be strongly attacked. OTOH, Aristippus proffers the rule without hesitation or doubt. Even if I had no moral compass, I'd recognize the difference between someone talking from a position of strength, and one of weakness.

why should I accept your version of morality

 

[Valentino14]

Women these days don't respect relationships or marriage. They can easily cheat and flirt over the internet without the husband even knowing. This sounds more like a bored housewife trying to have "fun" online. They usually hit you up for sex right away. Some guys talk tough over the internet so I wouldn't worry. Just don't flirt with maried women anymore.

 

[Down Low]

why should I accept your version of morality

"Version" of morality? Morality isn't some kind of buffet from which you may pick and choose whatever language and behavior to use in front of children, old people, women, etc. Your very language tells us that you clearly understand that you are pandering moral degeneracy.

 

[samspade]

"Version" of morality? Morality isn't some kind of buffet from which you may pick and choose whatever language and behavior to use in front of children, old people, women, etc. Your very language tells us that you clearly understand that you are pandering moral degeneracy.

This may sound degenerate, but it's all about consequences. If you know a woman is married and you continue overt flirting, you'd better be willing to accept the worst case scenario, which as we've seen is a lunatic husband with a gun. Whether it's someone else's idea of morality, or yours, or handed down by some God, you still have to choose to accept it or not. But ignoring the potential consequences of your actions is a fool's errand regardless of anyone's moral code.

 

[5string]

Morality aside. You have to be a real AFC idiot to fvck around with married women. Simply put, as samspade alluded, it's the consequences one has to be concerned with.

If you mess around with married women, that tell's me that you have no other options and are desperate. Not a trait of a true DJ.

 

[Atom Smasher]

I've found that most married women will flirt a bit, and I have several married male friends who are huge shameless over the top flirts including overtly sexual remarks. Rollo has recommended flirting while you are married, and especially in front of your wife.

I don't think a little harmless flirting is a bad thing, for either gender, but there is definitely a line you don't cross. Whether or not the OP crossed that line is difficult to say since we don't have all the details.

I've never bought into the "harmless flirting" concept. We are emotional creatures, and a harmless flirt today can easily go over the edge when one feels unappreciated, slighted, unloved, fill in anything else.

That "line you don't cross" will be dictated by the emotion of the moment (for both genders) and can be as mercurial as emotions themselves. It's a dangerous place to be in.

 

[Down Low]

I've never bought into the "harmless flirting" concept. We are emotional creatures, and a harmless flirt today can easily go over the edge when one feels unappreciated, slighted, unloved, fill in anything else.

That "line you don't cross" will be dictated by the emotion of the moment (for both genders) and can be as mercurial as emotions themselves. It's a dangerous place to be in.

Can you live there... will you live there with me?

"Open relationships" are a compromise to the modern age, where everything must always be for sale, or you will be punished for not putting it all on the market. Your girl-friend . . . was for sale. I bought her cheap and she svcked my d1ck in the changing room after she said her vows to you. Your wife . . . is still for sale. Your mother . . . is for sale. You . . . are for sale. You are my b1tch . . . whenever I buy your ass. You will be a passive observer of your woman flirting with me. You will be cuckolded by her and me. You will pay alimony and child support for her to play with me and our kids. You will talk your son into being my gay protege. He . . . is for sale too. You will do these things . . . and you will like it.

That, sirs, is the harsh reality of the Sexual Market Place. You're svckered into supporting sexual merchantry ("the game") with easy access to poon. You're recruited into being just another foot soldier in the worldwide social engineering corps. You will spend the rest of your days performing propaganda of the deed, going around hustling women, playing them for fools, and making it impossible for any man, any where, to be free of the Market Place.

DJs can talk all they want about swallowing the red pill, then coming to a deeper understanding of relationships, then broadening their social awareness to its political and legal forms. All of it is meaningless without a scathing self-examination of how your own behavior affects your fellow man.

 

[backbreaker]

I've never bought into the "harmless flirting" concept. We are emotional creatures, and a harmless flirt today can easily go over the edge when one feels unappreciated, slighted, unloved, fill in anything else.

That "line you don't cross" will be dictated by the emotion of the moment (for both genders) and can be as mercurial as emotions themselves. It's a dangerous place to be in.

yeah i'm with you.

I mean, if i walked into say the mall and saw some dude chatting up my wife and she was being polite and talking back, i have zero issue with that.

if she's all out flirting, playing touchy feely, making innuendos, she can harmlessly find her a new place to live.

it's a blanet sign of disrespect.

and "they started it" is not a viable excuse. I get hit on and you learn how to deflect. "I appreciate the compliment but I'm happily married"

I think there is a fine line between knowning you can flirt with girls and actually flirting with girls. There are plenty girls, well i don't want to sound like Hugh heffner or anything but i have an idea of if it came to it how i could flirt with and probably get a date if i had to today. but i dont' actually firt wtih them beucase that's disrespectful to my wife.

i spun plates with the best of them but once you decide to get in a real relationship you need to end that. that's how i feel. I'm a conversationalist, but i don't flirt or even let situations become escalated.