que_est_suave
Don Juan
- Joined
- Sep 6, 2004
- Messages
- 28
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Hi, this is my first post even tho im on this board aaaaall the time!! anywayz, I was wondering- what are some of the best opening lines you've ever used? something that is just so funny or so classic you were like 'yeaaaaah i'm using that!!!!"...
its just that, i dont find many ****y/funny examples around so i mostly come up with my own / use a few others... sorry if they're lame, i'm kinda new to this stuff. anyway, i'm gonna post my list below, if you've got a good line / routine please post!
here goes - (this is stuff either i've used or seen others use and they seem to work!?) :
"I like the outfit…"
“I think it’s cute when I woman tries to make her own clothes…”
or
“I think more women should try to make their own clothes too…”
"Nice shoes... I didn't know Tesco were doing value high heels..."
To an OBVIOUSLY FAKE BLONDE: “There are so many fake blondes in here that it’s nice to finally meet a real one…”
To a chick with a weave: “Well usually I only talk to women with at least 90% of their real hair…”
To a chick in a miniskirt / megabelt : “Nice skirt… what happened to the rest of it?” followed by “When they say 50% off… you gotta make sure they mean the price…”
“Like the necklace… it’s amazing the stuff you can pull out of a Christmas cracker these days…”
And in those situations where you know 'its on...' and she keeps touching you or slapping you or acting fake upset, I use:
“You know all this unwanted touching counts as sexual harassment… I’m afraid I’m gonna have to go speak to my lawer about this!” – Then walk away chat with ur m8s a bit, come back with…
“basically my lawyer said I can sue you for all you’re worth, but I figured a dollar isn’t really worth my time, and since i can see how much you like me, I’ll let you off the hook…”
"I can see you're upset... what I can do is, take down your number... and get someone from my complaints section to call you back."
its just that, i dont find many ****y/funny examples around so i mostly come up with my own / use a few others... sorry if they're lame, i'm kinda new to this stuff. anyway, i'm gonna post my list below, if you've got a good line / routine please post!
here goes - (this is stuff either i've used or seen others use and they seem to work!?) :
"I like the outfit…"
“I think it’s cute when I woman tries to make her own clothes…”
or
“I think more women should try to make their own clothes too…”
"Nice shoes... I didn't know Tesco were doing value high heels..."
To an OBVIOUSLY FAKE BLONDE: “There are so many fake blondes in here that it’s nice to finally meet a real one…”
To a chick with a weave: “Well usually I only talk to women with at least 90% of their real hair…”
To a chick in a miniskirt / megabelt : “Nice skirt… what happened to the rest of it?” followed by “When they say 50% off… you gotta make sure they mean the price…”
“Like the necklace… it’s amazing the stuff you can pull out of a Christmas cracker these days…”
And in those situations where you know 'its on...' and she keeps touching you or slapping you or acting fake upset, I use:
“You know all this unwanted touching counts as sexual harassment… I’m afraid I’m gonna have to go speak to my lawer about this!” – Then walk away chat with ur m8s a bit, come back with…
“basically my lawyer said I can sue you for all you’re worth, but I figured a dollar isn’t really worth my time, and since i can see how much you like me, I’ll let you off the hook…”
"I can see you're upset... what I can do is, take down your number... and get someone from my complaints section to call you back."
