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Online dating: ask her out in the first message

alboh

Master Don Juan
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I haven't been on here in a very long time, but I thought I'd share one tip I've learned in the always-treacherous world of online dating. My old approach when I found a girl I liked was to message her with some questions, go back and forth a few times, then finally ask her out. But I found this incredibly boring and awkward.

Then I tried something new - asking a girl out in the first e-mail. I'll write something like Hey, you seem really interesting. We should go out for drinks sometime soon ;). Well, usually I make it a bit longer than that.

My success rate is much, much higher with this strategy.
 

mcs

Don Juan
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what if she starts giving you 'i wanna know you better before meeting?' what do you think - is this pure BS or give her something and ask later again?
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
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It works as long as you have given a good enough reason for them to meet you, it's their call on whether it's good enough though.
 

Beethoven

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Yep, you'll get more success asking women out in the first email than waiting for a dozen or so - assuming your profile is up to scratch. But I think you'd get even more success asking them out in the third email. Too few emails = worrying for a girl, as she doesn't have a real impression of you yet. Too many emails = boring for a girl, she has loads of emails already, you're dragging it out. As usual, 'virtue is the mean between two extremes'.
 

Luveno

Master Don Juan
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If a girl emails you first, its a no-brainer to reply with plans for a date.

If you email a girl first, its best to request the date after she replies.

Also, state that you are interested in meeting people in the real world on your profile. Do not waiver from this
 

armadon

Don Juan
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Jan 13, 2007
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I decided to try out eharmony and so far It has worked descent. Setup a date for tonight and have 6 other numbers and that was just from this week. I started it up on Monday. i had to sift through a ton of women though to find the girls I wanted to take out. It's about one good women for every 5 with kids. There are good looking women on it also but majority are ugs.

I limit myself to 2 emails and it's working great. On the second email I just say send me your number and I'll give you a call. It's worked all but once so far.
 
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