ok wtf ... are most women seriously screwed up?

[muscleman]

Maybe this is obvious to some or I'm just an anomaly, but I just got to thinking about all my past "serious" relationships and here's what I came up with:

-7 total

-2 ran away from home at some point
-2 have been raped
-2 have been to juvi
-1 had a fvcked up childhood
-1 is a social reject
-half have low self esteem
-almost all have been on or are on some kind of meds

Am I just a magnet for this stuff or are most women in today's world just screwed up? My first gf from way back in high school is probably the only one that was "normal", but then again I never spent enough time with her to find out for sure. This is kinda depressing ...

 

[DJDamage]

Am I just a magnet for this stuff or are most women in today's world just screwed up?

A little bit from column A and a little bit from column B.

 

[Raikojo17]

all people have had bad things happen to them. my current girl has been kicked out of her house in the past. but she's not the least bit screwed up in the head. she has also had multiple guys use her, and always has dudes trying to fvck her, but she's pretty normal to me.

just because a girl has had bad experiences doesnt mean they are screwed up.

 

[PeterNorthisawesome]

Maybe this is obvious to some or I'm just an anomaly, but I just got to thinking about all my past "serious" relationships and here's what I came up with:

-7 total

-2 ran away from home at some point
-2 have been raped
-2 have been to juvi
-1 had a fvcked up childhood
-1 is a social reject
-half have low self esteem
-almost all have been on or are on some kind of meds

Am I just a magnet for this stuff or are most women in today's world just screwed up? My first gf from way back in high school is probably the only one that was "normal", but then again I never spent enough time with her to find out for sure. This is kinda depressing ...

Wow... I thought you KNEW how to SCREEN. You end up attracting people who are like you. I had 5 girlfriends and they were all normal, no barrage or hidden secrets. I'm pretty sure it's either bad luck or you haven't DJ talked. When you talk to a chick your suppose to test and find out if she's normal or not. If she isn't then... RUN AWAY. I had to deal with psycho chicks in the past and they're insane. Why go out with a chick you can't trust?

 

[ducaro]

Girls who have a bad past/childhood seriously need help. The fact is most of the women out there lack self esteem. why do you think L'oreal and co are making so much money???

2 out 3 of my x's have been raped in the past. Its sad. I also noticed I am turning out a 'magnet' that is attracting women who have a lack of self esteem. Yep, i am making postive changes to all of this.

The fact is, there are a lot of the women who have had a past that is affecting them now and there is no denying this.

i empathize.

 

[muscleman]

Well pete, I guess I haven't screened then. I have no idea how to when first meeting a girl. I mean, that sort of stuff (the really dark, past secrets) don't come out until I've been with a girl for a while and trust has been established.

But to say you attract people who are like you? I've attracted all kinds of different girls, and almost none of them were "like me".

Raik I agree that just because something bad has happened to a girl she won't be messed up, BUT going through a screwed up childhood WILL affect you in some way for the rest of your life. Some people seem to be able to make changes, and others can't.

I really can't even imagine a quality woman. Sad huh?

 

[Wyldfire]

The problem is that you are attracted to women you think you can "rescue" who will be so grateful to you for "saving" them that they will fall madly in love with you, be devoted and loyal forever and never leave you. It never works out that way, though, because you CAN'T rescue a woman any more than a woman can "fix" a man.

The best way to break this cycle is to slow down and not rush into involvements just because you hear a sob story and feel sympathy and let that vulnerability you see cause you to pursue a relationship with the woman.

Make a list of the traits you want in a woman and the ones you don't want. Keep that list on your mind whenever you meet a new woman and if she doesn't fit that positive list or fits more into the negative list then don't get involved with her. For this to work you need to SLOW DOWN and take your time getting to know a girl enough to figure out if she fits what you REALLY are looking for or if she is someone you feel compelled to try to "rescue".

Oh...and many very good women have had rough times in their lives. Don't judge them on what they have experienced, but rather in how they deal with bad things. If they are perpetual victims...steer clear. If they don't allow the crap to hold them back, then there's no reason not to get involved with them as long as they have the traits you like and don't have the traits you don't like.

 

[madgame]

-2 have been raped

Not quite sure, if that's something you could blame on them..

-1 had a fvcked up childhood

or that..

 

[ryannath]

^^Depends on what the "rape" was. If it was a drunken sex "rape", I would say she was partially at fault for being in that situation drunk. Now, if some guy jumped out of the buches and raped her, she would have no blame on her. Most "rapes" nowadays are the former.

 

[danielzxc]

I've known, and gone out with, plenty of "normal", well-adjusted chicks. Most people have had SOMETHING bad happen in their lives, but "normal" people don't let it affect them too greatly.

Maybe you've just had some bad luck, or maybe you are sub-consciously attracted to these types, or maybe you just fail to screen well for them. Screening isn't always 100%, and it usually takes a bit of time, and then you've got to sort of know the "signs" to look out for (cos if you wait til she spills the beans on ALL the bad stuff, it's kinda too late by then).

If you want a simple rule of thumb (not 100%, not by a long shot), richer chicks are usually less likely to be 'psycho' in some way than poor chicks.

 

[Interceptor]

The problem is that you are attracted to women you think you can "rescue" who will be so grateful to you for "saving" them that they will fall madly in love with you, be devoted and loyal forever and never leave you. It never works out that way, though, because you CAN'T rescue a woman any more than a woman can "fix" a man.

The best way to break this cycle is to slow down and not rush into involvements just because you hear a sob story and feel sympathy and let that vulnerability you see cause you to pursue a relationship with the woman.

Make a list of the traits you want in a woman and the ones you don't want. Keep that list on your mind whenever you meet a new woman and if she doesn't fit that positive list or fits more into the negative list then don't get involved with her. For this to work you need to SLOW DOWN and take your time getting to know a girl enough to figure out if she fits what you REALLY are looking for or if she is someone you feel compelled to try to "rescue".

Oh...and many very good women have had rough times in their lives. Don't judge them on what they have experienced, but rather in how they deal with bad things. If they are perpetual victims...steer clear. If they don't allow the crap to hold them back, then there's no reason not to get involved with them as long as they have the traits you like and don't have the traits you don't like.

This is good advice, guys.
I've had a "fallen" woman or two. Stay sharp and stay on you r game.
But understand clearly and perfectly what you want in a woman and in a relationship.
Remember, everyone needs and deserves love.

Maybe, just maybe, you ARE the RIGHT GUY for her.
You never know.
I have "fixed" a woman or two. It is possible. But it is NOT common.
Be prepared.

 

[MacDiddy]

Am I just a magnet for this stuff or are most women in today's world just screwed up?

First of all, don't flatter yourself. On average, other people don't seem to have the reoffending history that you do... It could be the company you keep, it could be you.. Why don't you tell us what kinda guy you are..

 

[Last Man Standing]

Were any of them virgins????

 

[yhgsvh74d]

i try to work the dynamic so that it's her that's rescuing me and not vice versa. unless you actually need rescuing, that usually makes for a better relationship

 

[sca_p]

Maybe this is obvious to some or I'm just an anomaly, but I just got to thinking about all my past "serious" relationships and here's what I came up with:

-7 total

-2 ran away from home at some point
-2 have been raped
-2 have been to juvi
-1 had a fvcked up childhood
-1 is a social reject
-half have low self esteem
-almost all have been on or are on some kind of meds

Am I just a magnet for this stuff or are most women in today's world just screwed up? My first gf from way back in high school is probably the only one that was "normal", but then again I never spent enough time with her to find out for sure. This is kinda depressing ...

Having bad things happen in one's life doesn't necessarily make them "screwed up". If you can come out of those bad events a little wiser and with the intention to move on and aspire to better things, then that is an admirable trait in a person.

Things like rape, prison time, and horrible childhoods aren't trivial. They're traumatic events that leave some real deep scars. You can't expect a rape victim to just forget it ever happened a month, a year, or even a decade later. If you can't care and support a woman who was raped or abused by her uncle, then next her so a more competent man can date her. As for low self-esteem, with the huge emphasis these days on a body image that most women could never feasibly (or healthily) achieve, no wonder so many woman don't feel good about their bodies.

 

[yhgsvh74d]

I like this sca_p guy, most guys my age aren't really sharp in this regard. That said, some people can't be saved and will not appreciate your attempts to love and care for them.

 

[Deadly_Ripped]

All women are pretty screwed up.

Many people underestimate the social pressure placed on women.

Just listen to them talk in a small group..... they never stop and it's not biological, it's cultural. Most women are borderline psychotic, and many have depression and physical health issues.

I'm not speaking from women I've dated exclusively, I'm basing this off of my experiences with almost all women I've interacted with.

Some are winners, but being a winner doesn't mean not being screwed up... it just means hiding it well or dealing with it better than others.

 

[Raikojo17]

Were any of them virgins????

obviously not if they have been raped. lol

 

[sca_p]

obviously not if they have been raped. lol

What a rude, disrespectful, insensitive thing to say. You just mocked rape victims who struggle with the trauma of the rape itself, the trauma of having their virginity stolen from them, and the trauma of knowing people will think of them as "damaged goods" for the rest of their lives. Good job.

 

[mrRuckus]

When you talk to a chick your suppose to test and find out if she's normal or not.

You mean if she's ABNORMAL then keep her.

Because the average normal female is fvcking crazy.