Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

No, no is it really not ok to react to not ignore a girl..

(JJ)

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Keep It Simple

there're so many people out there, on this site and others, claiming to be experts, filling your head with lines, routines, and other shenanigans to trick women into liking you, with a few good nuggets sprinkled in.

for the men out there like you, accension, who are still right on the cusp of figuring it out, it IS very confusing.

I have always found that the easiest way to success is to keep it as simple as possible.

-know that you are a man, and that you deserve the best from yourself, from your friends, and from your women, and you will tolerate nothing but.

-be self actualized. have confidence in yourself to solidify the aforementioned belief.

-understand how the world works. not all the girls will like you, and you will not like all the girls. accept it and love life even more for the challenge.

-above all, see the point above. love life. make everything you can of it, your time is short.

if you can get those things to become parts of your being, then you will find all of your issues evaporating, quickly.

as far as your initial points, i will tell you how I handle them, because even though i am young, i feel that i may be able to guide you with my insight.

We shouldn't call her until 1/2/3/x days:
You should be a busy man, who has time for calling a girl when he has time for calling her. if that's the very same day, then so be it. if it's not for a week, then that's fine too. the point is that the girl should be picking up on what kind of man she is dealing with-one who she WANTS to talk to on the phone.

Not to get attached to her:
As Bukowski_Merit and others have said, getting attached is totally okay when a girl is WORTHY of your feelings. you are a man whose feelings are very valuable and you dont waste them on low class individuals. another main thing to remember is that "the person in any interaction who cares the least, controls that interaction." and there's nothing that keeps a relationship fresher for a woman than thinking that there MAY BE somewhere deep inside you an ability to walk away. caring more than her gives up your power and makes the relationship stale.

That we shouldn't be mad if she has heaps of guy friends:
I dont know where you heard this. if a girl has heaps of guy friends, she is a non issue. these kinds of girls are not worth your time for anything other than carnal desires. once your sexual appetites are satisfied, abandon ship. these are not relationship girls.
scenario when i find it acceptable to date these types: early on, while being your joking fun self, say something like "oh yea, you're fun for now, but you and i would never work out long term. i cant stand girls with lots of guy friends." her response should be something along the lines of "oh well i dont really even talk to them... and if the right guy came along i would drop all of them at the drop of a hat." this is the ONLY acceptable response. if she says this, she has earned a bit longer to prove that she will in fact follow through on this. if she doesnt, abandon ship.


don't worry man. eventually you'll figure it out. dont stress so much about it.

just keep it simple.
 

OMGWTFLMAO

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The reason many guys struggle to "get girls" is because they care too much about getting them and become somewhat obsessed about it. When you care too much you over analyze everything you do and say, and all you do is think about it. STOP thinking about it and just live your life! Go out and have fun, meet people just for the sake of meeting them and STOP worrying about it. When you stop all that nonsense you can relax and then you'll have plenty of opportunities with the opposite sex. This is what people who are naturally good with the opposite sex do. They DON'T CARE if they attract people or not. They just go about their business and life and then opportunities come to them.

Focus on yourself, improve yourself and your life and nevermind worrying about women. If you take care of yourself and improve yourself so that YOU are happy it WILL make you attractive and people WILL want to be around you.
 

OMGWTFLMAO

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I think the "guy friends" thing really depends on the situation. The friends could be from back when she was 10 years old or younger. They could be gay. They could be married to another friend. They could be the boyfriend of another friend. As long as the guy isn't trying to get into her pants and you are included and welcomed into the friendship there isn't a problem with opposite sex friends.
 

Ease

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This thread has nothing new to contribute. Dont be so simple minded and easy to manipulate guys, learn to think for yourselves.

Women want you to pursue them, but if you aren't aggressive with it she'll flake on you for someone that is straight up with not playing her

You guys try not to care about pursuing her by making less of an effort than the other guys. This doesn't work because in her reality, guys make the effort because they want her, so instead of her chasing you, she'll just think "Hmm, he mustn't want me. Good thing I have plenty of guys that do.

"Dont get attached. Dont show reactions. These are basics to LTR."
Because you'd rather ignore the truth: our only power is validating her or not validating her.

I'm here to challenge Sosuave's belief system because I don't think this has occurred in a very long time.
I'm trying to say stop all this BS and accept our position.
No offence buddy but your posts are full of nonsense.

Id be more than willing to accept if you had any substantial background knowledge or new thinking, but all your doing is making a stand for nothing.

Its easy to throw up a 'PUA's are fakes, be yourself!' bandwagon and have a lot of guys agree with you just for the sake of it, but its pointless.

I dont think you have had much experience. Your advice is bad.
 

terran2k

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OP; for someone who is so unsure of himself, you sure have alot of advice to give.
 

Tazman

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Accension said:
I basically wasted a good year of my life following these stupid, ****ing rules when I could have just been pursuing her like a normal guy and not worrying about appearing too available, needy, desperate or what ever you want to call it.
Describe one situation where you got the short end of the stick and exactly what advice you were following that steered you wrong.

I guarantee it wasn't the advice, but rather your INCORRECT interpretation.

Also, how does a "normal" guy, in your own words, approach chicks without appearing desperate? Who's advice told you otherwise?

Answer these questions and you'll get a definitive answer instead of calling out all this ambiguous advice that you claim is wrong.

Lets get specific.
 

JdelaSilviera

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Since I started reading PUA material about 10 months ago, I only tried to hit on two girls (both HB8) and kiss closed both. I know it´s a short number to say this material is awesome, but first I´m picky so I´m not interested in fvcking half the women in my city, and these girls are really hard to get... They have lots of guys hitting on them (including guys with bodybuilder looks). Who got the girls? me...
Just needed to be ****y, funny and teasing, making them think I had a lot of girls pursuing me (wich I made convincing when I was the only guy dancing with 5 girls in the club) ... that simple. Althought you have to be somewhat sensitive on how you apply this, and when...

And sure you have to "pursue" the girl, but only after she is attracted to you, this is really basic stuff.

If you do what all other guys are doing (and not being successful) you´ll get the same results...
 

CuriousGirl

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OP I think, from the PUA stuff I've read on here and on the internet... I can recognise and see how it works and why it works, but the stuff I've read..yeah it'll get you into bed with a girl probably but that's it. It might not even get her to like you. If you want anything more than sex then the pick-up stuff doesn't really help and I don't think that's what it was designed for anyway. Although I think there is some stuff on this site that is more akin to relationship advice, so the same can't be said for everything on here. I personally think with this pua stuff it shouldn't be religiously followed, people and life isn't as formulaic as the theories make out. I'm probably going to be slated for saying that, because what would a 19yo know about life right? But at the end of the day it's a person you're treating, not a robot.




(JJ) said:
That we shouldn't be mad if she has heaps of guy friends:
I dont know where you heard this. if a girl has heaps of guy friends, she is a non issue. these kinds of girls are not worth your time for anything other than carnal desires. once your sexual appetites are satisfied, abandon ship. these are not relationship girls.
scenario when i find it acceptable to date these types: early on, while being your joking fun self, say something like "oh yea, you're fun for now, but you and i would never work out long term. i cant stand girls with lots of guy friends." her response should be something along the lines of "oh well i dont really even talk to them... and if the right guy came along i would drop all of them at the drop of a hat." this is the ONLY acceptable response. if she says this, she has earned a bit longer to prove that she will in fact follow through on this. if she doesnt, abandon ship.
.
What's wrong with a girl having a lot of guy friends? (and by friends I mean no-sex friends)
 

I'm in the Mood

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CuriousGirl said:
OP I think, from the PUA stuff I've read on here and on the internet... I can recognise and see how it works and why it works, but the stuff I've read..yeah it'll get you into bed with a girl probably but that's it. It might not even get her to like you. If you want anything more than sex then the pick-up stuff doesn't really help and I don't think that's what it was designed for anyway. Although I think there is some stuff on this site that is more akin to relationship advice, so the same can't be said for everything on here. I personally think with this pua stuff it shouldn't be religiously followed, people and life isn't as formulaic as the theories make out. I'm probably going to be slated for saying that, because what would a 19yo know about life right? But at the end of the day it's a person you're treating, not a robot.
"PUA stuff" can get you one-night stands, but it's not limited to just that.
You can use PUA stuff to develop any kind of relationship you want with a woman, even to make friends. You might initially be picking up a girl for practice, or even be in pursuit of a girlfriend, and then end up disqualifying her for whatever reason, but keep her as a friend. If you're a guy who respects girlfriend/boyfriend relationships and find a girl you like, then find out she has a boyfriend, you might choose to make friends with her.

My teacher taught me an 8-Level emotional progression model, but I'm going to use the one in Magic Bullets to illustrate my point.

1. Opener/Transition
2. Attraction
3. Qualification
4. Comfort

5. Seduction

If you get to #4, comfort, you can develop ANY kind of relationship you want.
It's fairly easy to reach comfort if you're a social person and know what you're doing.

The sex thing is just for guys who RUSH through the model and push into #5, seduction, as quickly as possible after reaching comfort.

You could even disqualify a girl in #3 and still proceed into comfort.

So your results can vary widely depending on how you use what you know. PUA stuff does not limit you to sex only.
 

CuriousGirl

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I'm in the Mood said:
"PUA stuff" can get you one-night stands, but it's not limited to just that.
You can use PUA stuff to develop any kind of relationship you want with a woman, even to make friends. You might initially be picking up a girl for practice, or even be in pursuit of a girlfriend, and then end up disqualifying her for whatever reason, but keep her as a friend. If you're a guy who respects girlfriend/boyfriend relationships and find a girl you like, then find out she has a boyfriend, you might choose to make friends with her.

My teacher taught me an 8-Level emotional progression model, but I'm going to use the one in Magic Bullets to illustrate my point.

1. Opener/Transition
2. Attraction
3. Qualification
4. Comfort

5. Seduction

If you get to #4, comfort, you can develop ANY kind of relationship you want.
It's fairly easy to reach comfort if you're a social person and know what you're doing.

The sex thing is just for guys who RUSH through the model and push into #5, seduction, as quickly as possible after reaching comfort.

You could even disqualify a girl in #3 and still proceed into comfort.

So your results can vary widely depending on how you use what you know. PUA stuff does not limit you to sex only.
Hmmm ok, but surely you've still got to click with the girl to have a lasting relationship? I mean, there's alot of different personalities out there and this theory is supposed to work for all of them (I assume) but there are surely people you just couldn't have a long term relationship with, you just don't gel.

Also, I've just thought, if you (or another guy) wanted to attract a guy, would you do the same stuff? Or a girl attracting a girl?
 

kingsam

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Accension said:
I wasted a year following these stupid dam theories when all I had to do was basically tell her I like her, tell her if she becomes a ***** she's out of my life and then flirt followed by elementary sex.

[/COLOR]
so you had onitis for a girl and you tried to use these techiniques on her?
 

Trader

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It is quite clear that you do not understand the *theories* that you are attacking. Your thinking is not clear


Accension said:
No, no is it really not ok to react to not ignore a girl..
Stop with the triple negatives, unclear writing usually indicates unclear thought processes, which explains your inability to understand many of the principles on this site
 

Falcon25

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Listen man,

Just be yourself but not in a desperate way. Go ahead and chase the girl a little. Don't tell her how you feel, show it. Keep your guard up, don't let a girl in your heart until she first lets you in hers. If she likes you, it doesn't matter what you say, how long you wait, etc. You don't need pick up lines. But remember, looks, and clothes, and money and success all those things still matter. So work out, buy some nice clothes, get a good education and a great job and everything else will come too. Talk to girls, be nice and friendly. Kiss her after a date. Ask her out. Ask her if she's single, if she's on the rebound, get a way. Don't read books. I have never had trouble getting women, keeping them, sure. But I did one thing that most do not do. I was sincere. I showed her I liked her. I made sure she had fun. I made her smile. I gave her attention. But I never took disrespect, I walked away from the wrong girl. None of this matters as long as you just take care of yourself and do good things in life. Good Luck.
 

xdreamz

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Ease said:
Bad post. If you dont understand it, then ask for it to be explained. Dont spread your lack of knowledge and try to proclaim it is wrong, just because you think you know better.

Dont get attached. Dont show reactions. These are basics to LTR.

All of these things are generalizations now come on...how are you going to not get attached to a broad and how are you not going to react to ****. We are human not robots. We don't CAPS LOCK attachment and NUMB LOCK reactions. Don't repress sexuality any more than it already is.

You guys are ready to bash any popular methods out there (which probably took a lot of experience and talk like this to figure out) but are quick to praise each others 15 minute rants on philosophy not getting girls. There's truth to be told by those guys. It's like all you guys are willing to accept are lies rather than the truth! It's not all about lines, opening, and closes.. open your ears to wisdom & understanding and you will be able to make your own mystery method with stories of your life and neg hits from your mind with ease...all you have to do is open up.
 

bish0p

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xdreamz said:
All of these things are generalizations now come on...how are you going to not get attached to a broad and how are you not going to react to ****. We are human not robots. We don't CAPS LOCK attachment and NUMB LOCK reactions. Don't repress sexuality any more than it already is.
haha...another good post.
 

(JJ)

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CuriousGirl said:
What's wrong with a girl having a lot of guy friends? (and by friends I mean no-sex friends)

she's an attention wh0re
 

CuriousGirl

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(JJ) said:
she's an attention wh0re
not necessarily, what about tomboys? Or girls who just generally get on with men as much as they do women? I like male company as much as I like female company. I wouldn't want to only ever be around women or only ever be around men..I suppose I've got more female friends but still have alot of male friends who I like to have a laugh with. And a few of them confide in me with things and we take advice from each other and that kind of stuff too, it's not attention seeking they are actual friendships.
 

CaptainJ

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CuriousGirl said:
not necessarily, what about tomboys? Or girls who just generally get on with men as much as they do women? I like male company as much as I like female company. I wouldn't want to only ever be around women or only ever be around men..I suppose I've got more female friends but still have alot of male friends who I like to have a laugh with. And a few of them confide in me with things and we take advice from each other and that kind of stuff too, it's not attention seeking they are actual friendships.
Maybe, but if you are hot, I'm betting that most of those "friends" just want to get into your pants.
 

Kailex

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CuriousGirl said:
And a few of them confide in me with things and we take advice from each other and that kind of stuff too, it's not attention seeking they are actual friendships.
All it takes is the sound of your panties hitting the floor and they'd ALL try to get with you. And don't... for a SINGLE SECOND... believe that they wouldn't.

These aren't actual friendships. Each one of your male friends (unless you look like the Hunchback of Notre Dame) wouldn't even think twice about getting you all lathered up in whipped cream and have you enjoying their cannoli.

Most women with tons of male friends are women surrounding themselves with orbiters, an army of willing minions, amassed to keep themselves in the loop. Most of these women, actually KNOW that at least one of these friends, is interested, or would be...

It's always a nice boost.

Tomboys? Doesn't that term get dropped at around age 13, once women start hitting puberty? Tomboys are usually just women who haven't discovered their sexuality yet, and once they do... and start dressing more feminine, acting more feminine and talking as such... you'll see their male friends begin to see them in a different light.

If they really are your friends... test them.
Get naked in front of each of them and say you want to bang them now.
Whoever says "NO" is either gay or trying to live out the plot to a Hollywood movie where he'd rather have you in a romantic setting and wanted it to be perfect.

Everyone else, would just jump you, spin you around, smack you on the a$$ and call you Susan.





EDIT: Thank you Curious Girl, for proving my point, in your next post. I'd HATE to be the guy who came in next and tried to date you when you spend almost all of your time with your so-called male friends, knowing that at any moment's notice, you could be banging any of them. That just absolutely PROVES the fact that women with tons of MALE friends are just danger. Like your little orbiter friends are actually going to let a guy just plow on through and take away their "friend" time with you. It's a HUGE red flag, and instead of trying to disprove my point and the rule about it... you just blatantly admitted why we should stay away from women like you.
 
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CuriousGirl

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CaptainJ said:
Maybe, but if you are hot, I'm betting that most of those "friends" just want to get into your pants.
A couple of them have outright told me they do, but they are still good friends and see me as a mate. Just that with some of them I'm a mate they'd ****. One of them I have fooled around with a bit...but we're just friends, nothing changed after. I think there are cases were sex and friendship are blurred and it doesn't have to change a thing! I still hang out with all of them sometimes and have a good laugh, I'm invited to the poker nights and because I like football I'll sometimes go to the pub with them to watch it with them. And like I said, some of them tell me stuff that they wouldn't necessarily want to talk about with each other because they know I won't laugh in their face. I'd definitely say you can have a friendship with the opposite sex ....having said that, probably not as close as the friendships I have with my closest girls though.
 
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