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No kiss close on first date good or bad?

ZhaoYun

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Had a great time with this hb I just recently got in touch with. We went to get dinner and I took her to the store so she could grab a few things for her cousins birthday. Had a blast, good kino, convo, teasing, etc..

When I took her home she said she had fun and gave me a hug. Went for the kiss close and got the cheek to which I didn't kiss the first time. So I just got another hug then laid one on her cheek. She said she didn't kiss like that on the first date and again said she had fun and she'd see me tomorrow.

Interest is definitely there - she did a good job of validating herself and even called me before the scheduled date time to find out if we were still going out. I'm used to getting at least kiss closes on first dates. Do some girls just not do that no matter how interested they are?
 

Jitterbug

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They're all into it (despite what they might say) if you kiss them at the right moment, and that moment doesn't have to be the very end of the date.

It might also be a good thing to delay it for the next date if you can sense sexual tension but the logistics isn't there for escalating to a lay. You can build it right up by pretending to go in for a kiss but just grinning knowingly at her with seductive eye contact then pulling out. Rinse & repeat.
 

Rhoto

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ZhaoYun said:
Do some girls just not do that no matter how interested they are?
Sure. But in my experience one of two things usually end up happening -

a) She ends up not being worth it.

b) She's got serious baggage.


You went to a store? Was there any alcohol involved? Something seems off with the information you've given.

Just because she laughed and had a good time doesn't remove you from the friends zone.

Test it out, ignore her for a week. You were buried in work, gauge her response. And using Jitter's kiss scheme is good.
 

ZhaoYun

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Roommate told me she might just be the type to take things slow. I guess it's no big deal and I could just take things slow with her while still spinning plates.

Rhoto, you're right I didn't mention everything.

She had to be at her cousins birthday party at a certain time and we only had about one hour to spend with each other. I took her to Walmart so she could grab some balloons and cake for her sister.

Also, last week I suggested hanging out and we're both busy with school work so she countered with meeting up today and it worked out. Alcohol wasn't involved at all, she won't be 21 for another month.
 

trd323

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ZhaoYun said:
Do some girls just not do that no matter how interested they are?
Yes, All my great relationships except one did not give me a kiss on the first date. Most of them also made me wait for the lay, but most of them was definitely worth it in my experience. You have to guage what kind of girl you are dating, and really understand why she is making you wait. I tend to like the beautiful girls that know they are hot but have morals. So they do not let any guy hit it. Another good guage is if she is always testing you and trying to see if your actions do not change; never expect an outcome in your actions always do what you feel and want then you can never have any regrets.

When you are with a girl never let any thing in your mind except the two of you; enjoy the moment and live in the moment, and I guarantee you that you will always know what to do. If you suddenly start asking yourself questions of "should I kiss her? should I hold her hand? my advice to you is that you should have done all those 5 minutes ago.
 

WhtRbt

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If you wanna play hardball you would dump this chick for giving you the cheek.

Here's the guidelines I follow for when to go for the kiss.

Going for the first kiss is an excellent test of interest. If she likes you, she'll kiss you, simple as that. That's why I said dump the girl if she gave you the cheek. It's a sign of low interest.

So here's what I do. If i'm SURE she's interested at the end of the first date, I don't go for the kiss. I want her DYING to kiss me. I will kiss her at the end of the second date.

If i'm not sure of her interest at the end of the first date, then I go for the kiss, to force her to show her hand. If she gives me the cheek, well then I know she's not interested. If she kisses me, I'm still in the ballgame.
 

suavesuave

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when u guys say kiss on the first date. does it mean on the cheek or lips?
 

russell

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this is why I DON'T kiss on the first date, because then they will want it and i won't be giving it to them. i always act like i put them in the friend zone on the first date.
 

Freeman

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ZhaoYun said:
Had a great time with this hb I just recently got in touch with. We went to get dinner and I took her to the store so she could grab a few things for her cousins birthday. Had a blast, good kino, convo, teasing, etc..

When I took her home she said she had fun and gave me a hug. Went for the kiss close and got the cheek to which I didn't kiss the first time. So I just got another hug then laid one on her cheek. She said she didn't kiss like that on the first date and again said she had fun and she'd see me tomorrow.

Interest is definitely there - she did a good job of validating herself and even called me before the scheduled date time to find out if we were still going out. I'm used to getting at least kiss closes on first dates. Do some girls just not do that no matter how interested they are?


in your post here you said the phrase "that interest is def. there".-- and you know what...youre absolutely right-but the truth is this:we all have motives with our interactions with the people we meet-meaning that we all have plans for where we want them to be in our lives-sometimes we create a relationship where we only see it as a friendship, others we try to make it into a relationship-your job is to find out what is her plans for you? does she see you just as a friend or a "guy friend" who she wants to create a possible romantic relationship with.

This may sound cliche but its so true-you'd know by paying close attention to her actions and not the magic-
 

Freeman

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russell said:
this is why I DON'T kiss on the first date, because then they will want it and i won't be giving it to them. i always act like i put them in the friend zone on the first date.
I feel you on the whole keep 'em guessin bit-but you have to be careful with that ploy my friend she might think you are gay if you get to platonic with her.
 

russell

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Freeman said:
I feel you on the whole keep 'em guessin bit-but you have to be careful with that ploy my friend she might think you are gay if you get to platonic with her.
well i dont have that problem. just because you don't kiss close doesn't mean you're gay. if the girl thinks you're faggy then that's a whole other issue.
 

CyranoDeBergerac

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suavesuave said:
when u guys say kiss on the first date. does it mean on the cheek or lips?
I'm not flaming you, but that's like asking whether dry-humping with your clothes on is the same thing as vaginal intercourse.
 

ZhaoYun

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Freeman said:
in your post here you said the phrase "that interest is def. there".-- and you know what...youre absolutely right-but the truth is this:we all have motives with our interactions with the people we meet-meaning that we all have plans for where we want them to be in our lives-sometimes we create a relationship where we only see it as a friendship, others we try to make it into a relationship-your job is to find out what is her plans for you? does she see you just as a friend or a "guy friend" who she wants to create a possible romantic relationship with.

This may sound cliche but its so true-you'd know by paying close attention to her actions and not the magic-
I believe I do a good job with reading women. I'm definitely not a pro, but good. She was laughing at nearly all of my jokes, said I was funny and was very reciprocate of my light touches and what not. True, she may also allow her "friends" to do that sort of thing too but I was being more open and sensual with my touches.

Also, even though I didn't get the kiss close, I believe that going for it was a good way for me to show her what my intentions are. The fact that she gave and hug and cheek kiss may just be her letting me know she isn't easy. We don't really know each other that well so perhaps she just wants to be safe.
 

WhtRbt

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If she had high interest she would've kissed you on the lips. Maybe she just likes free nights out and dinners.
 

pua1989

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i think you guys are all dumb. she said "i dont kiss like that on the first _date_"

notice, date is underlined. what does this mean? she knew it was a date, said she had a good time, so there is no mistaken thought that you guys went out only as friends. play your cards right and next couple dates you can prolly get the lay.


dump her to play hardball???? hahaha i didnt even read what else whoever that was said after that
 

WhtRbt

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I'm sure she did have a good time. She got a free meal and someone to help her pick out a present for her cousin. Going for the kiss she turned her head. He showed his true feelings, and she showed hers.
 

ZhaoYun

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^^ Didn't help her pick out anything. And it's not like we went to some bigtime restaurtant, I took her to freakin Dairy Queen.

Btw, if it matters she asked me when we can go out again today. Told her perhaps soon but we're both busy. Said she'll look forward to it.

So yeah, that pretty much confirms things I think.
 

WhtRbt

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Well, hopefully things go well. I think it's a big red flag anyway.
 

Freeman

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ZhaoYun said:
^^ Didn't help her pick out anything. And it's not like we went to some bigtime restaurtant, I took her to freakin Dairy Queen.

Btw, if it matters she asked me when we can go out again today. Told her perhaps soon but we're both busy. Said she'll look forward to it.

So yeah, that pretty much confirms things I think.

sounds good man-wasnt trying to be a downer man just wanted you to be realistic about it- sometimes reality is great and sometimes it sucks-from what you said here it sounds like its pretty good so keep it up
 
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