new to online dating - a few observations

[Demodulate]

So I signed up for a free online dating service, just to see whats out there.. Uploaded a few pics, wrote a short profile, answered some questions, and started looking around..

What do I find?

most "average" woman are fat cows..
most "curvy" woman are grossly obese..

I am half tempted to start telling people they aren't what they say they are..

I am "Average", I work out at least 3 times a week and watch what I eat, and using the online BMI calculators I come at a "Normal" weight.. I am not adonis, but I can take my shirt of at the beach and not feel ashamed.

Girls WANTING to get married have kids tomorrow, and saying so on their profile.. This is like repellent for me.. how in the hell can you decide you want to get married and have kids without even having a good mate first..

Pretty girls with *****y attitudes proclaiming how they are only on here for fun/people watching and not to message them unless you fit into some strict guidelines they have set forth.

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anyway.. just a few observations..

 

[AMDG]

I have all kinds of experiences with online dating - including

- girls contacting me for sex, no strings attached

- desperate single moms looking for someone to pay the bills

- weird emo girls looking to play mind games

- average-looking girls looking for a sugar daddy

- romantic girls looking for a fairytale ( with babies on the fast track )

and so on.

Since I was seeing more girls at a time it was fun - a steady flow of intimacy and interesting moments when former low-interest plates were pursuing me after dumping them. Any questions ?

 

[High Voltage]

In my experience online dating is a massive waste of time for guys.

I messed around with Plenty of Fish out of curiosity. Literally all of the women within 100 km of me were very low quality for one reason or another. Yet I can go to the grocery store or gym and meet some cool girls. In my opinion dating sites attract girls who can't get a date in real life because of some massive flaw in their character and/or looks.

PoF has a feature where you state your longest relationship. The fact that most girls 25-30 have never had a relationship longer than 1 year was a huge red flag.

 

[Colossus]

Seems like every week we get a new online dating thread...

But I agree about it being a massive waste of time. I've only used two sites but both of them have like 6 different synonyms for FAT.

It is easy to generate plates, problem is they aren't of the highest caliber. In your situation coming out of a relationship it might not be a bad idea to get your feet wet again and maybe keep your morale up...but in my experience 9 out of 10 encounters were a complete waste of time.

I was actually with a girl for over a year that I met online, and she certainly met my quality standards, but it didnt work out for personality reasons. Definitely the exception to the rule.

 

[Solomon]

It's rough, I can't hit the field right now because of lack of funds (and not having a car) online dating is the bottom of the barrell

Single moms- who feel their entitled to prince charming or still thing their single, or want a daddy.

AW-typically the hottest on the site, who just come on for validation or now you got the AW who says she can't find a guy

fat chicks-who think their the shyt, but out in the field they wouldn't even be looked at.

If it wasn't for my situation I wouldn't be dong online dating, its great for a fling or quick pumpNdump, for something serious and long term, hell no!

 

[omkara]

Reading the thread about how bad clubs are nowadays made me feel not bad at all for resorting to online flirtation. A lot of the same dynamics are at work with both of them, ie female hypergamy.

Whether people participate in the online game or not, the advent of Myspace, and now Fakebook, have totally transformed the way women perceive their level of options. Just like how people talk about how, oh I've noticed in the last 3 years that women are not responding after the first date and flaking more. This is about the same time period that Fakebook has become popular.

 

[TheAsianLoverReturns]

You get what you pay for.

I pulled the majority of my nice looking women from match.com

 

[squirrels]

I'm kinda frustrated with it at this point.

MySpace was awesome for making new "friends" and for hooking up/dating. Facebook doesn't lend itself to that...it's all about getting up the asses of people you already know.

The girls you get on "dating sites" (as opposed to "social networking sites") are the ones who, before the Internet, were surfing the personal ads.

Meaning they're not getting anything through the "usual" channels.

Expect to sift through a lot of fatties, single moms, fatties, drama queens, fatties, and girls who take dating way too seriously. (Did I mention fatties?)

Agree with the above poster who said it's good for acquiring a bunch of "plates" when you're first getting back into the game.

What I've noticed about "the game" is that it's getting HARDER, not EASIER. In a time where everything else about society is getting easier and more networked, sexuality is still "off the grid", and because of that it's getting harder and harder to get women to come out of their shells. Before, girls could sneak out to a nightclub and take care of their "secret girly desires". Now, they go to the club and everyone they know is there. They used to be able to go onto MySpace and meet people they could "be discreet with". Now they go there and everyone they know is there.

Sex has gone underground. But it's there...it's just going to take a higher level of game than it previously took. And you have to be willing to step outside the bounds of propriety.

There is no generally accepted "meat market" like there used to be...you're gonna have to hunt.

 

[Demodulate]

Well I have had a few interactions, and one girl is pursuing me pretty hard.. but I think she is overweight.. her older pics look ok, but her newer ones she only has face shots and they arent that great of quality.. i.e. cropped and blown up..

honestly I dont really even want to date right now, I just signed up for I dont know why.. ego boost..

she asked me out for a drink last night as I was getting off chat.. I didnt get the message till this morning..

what the hell do I do? ask for a full body shot before making plans?

wwssd?

p.s. she is hell bent on meeting prince charming.. I am definitely not that guy right now..

 

[vatoloco]

See here.

 

[saab1981]

What is it with some ugly women and these dating sites? They look like Ernest Borgnine in a dress yet they think they have a god given right to a Brad Pitt/George Clooney/'Mr Right' Hybrid- WTF?!

 

[Zarky]

lul.. it doesn't take much money, but a lot of time. My last 20 lays have come from online dating.

What is it with some ugly women and these dating sites? They look like Ernest Borgnine in a dress yet they think they have a god given right to a Brad Pitt/George Clooney/'Mr Right' Hybrid- WTF?!

What??? Next you're going to tell me that hotties like this are "unattractive":

http://www.plentyoffish.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=13806788

 

[IamMyownMan]

Online dating is for pussies...literally.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Demodulate,
look its "Horses for courses",I am grateful to Internet Dating....two principal reasons,both having direct transfer value to the real scene....firstly it enables you after a hundred or so contacts to discern the broad personality types you are tangling with.....Remarkable as it seems,you only need a couple of words on their profiles and you can sideline them....The guys who have success here have intuitively grasped this ability...The second thing is it helps you put together your own real needs and express them in an attractive way....in measured responses with loads of time to reflect and present your views you meet the same questions that will come up on a date,you will respond in real life,as if reciting lines in a play...so keep plugging on but don't neglect your body,your hobbies and your other social skills like Dancing.

 

[Zarky]

Remarkable as it seems,you only need a couple of words on their profiles and you can sideline them...

This is very true. For example, if I see the words "traditional" or "picky" anywhere on a girl's profile, I skip it. But it takes years and lots of mistakes to get to point where you're proficient. Just like anything, I guess.

 

[Atom Smasher]

What is it with some ugly women and these dating sites? They look like Ernest Borgnine in a dress yet they think they have a god given right to a Brad Pitt/George Clooney/'Mr Right' Hybrid- WTF?!

It's because women will believe anything they are told. Anything. Just look at what the media feeds them. They are currently in a massive fantasy world of entitlement.

Virtually every commercial on TV shows the man bumbling and fumbling around as a clueless dolt, and the woman comes along and solves the problem, then shakes her head with her eyebrows furrowed as if to say, "That poor, helpless, lovable dolt". They are taught from day one that they are superior and they are our saviors (saving us from our clueless selves).

And every women's TV show actually celebrates obesity. You're not fat. No, you're curvy, vivacious, plus-size, ample, "big, beautiful", natural, "big boned", "healthfully round", robust, full-figured, etc.

I would like to propose a new adjective for the times: "Borgnineish".

 

[DJ_Traveler]

I have a mix feeling about online dating sites.

First the bad: The few decent chicks can be hard to get in touch as they are receiving an insane amount of emails from guys.
The girls tend to date multiple men which can make them more picky and overconfident for what they really are.
Lots of chicks with issues (shy, drama queens...)
On paper you may match well but once you meet them in person you may be in for a surprise...

The good: A great place to look for women when you don't have much time in your life.

You get to go on a lot of dates and you may come to find out what you like and don't like in women.

In short, I think online dating complement well to field dating.

 

[betheman]

went on a second date last night with a woman from POF. She is the best ive dated yet, in fact the only one I would date twice...and again! kissed , touched a lot on both dates, the next time ill be dissapointed not to get over the winning line. she is in no hurry, neither am I, what is interesting is her reaction, ive been reading this site for a few weeks now and ive put into practice some of the dating tips and to quote her..."ive never done or felt this way as quick on a date before"! concidence? I dont think so!
overall I think POF is bollocks, but it can help with practice tips/moves strategies and just maybe one or two might come along who you actually want to date again