Need Some Guidance (pt. 2 Electric Boogalo)

[DivinityCove]

Here are my biggest problems guys,

I need to be doing something with a girl at all times like have an activity or a goal at hand or else i feel like I have no clue what i'm doing and theirs no point in me being there. (I feel this way with all friends so i guess its normal I like doing things not sitting on my ass)

For instance one night after i took a girl out and it started raining I just cut the date/hangout short because i had no clue what to do. and we couldn't gone back to my place or her's.

Another thing is once i get girls alone so i can go in for the kiss, I start to freeze up don't know what to talk about to start going towards the kiss.

For instance we went to the top of the hill and just look at the skyline. I didn't know what to talk about to start getting more sexual or what to say to kinda get ready for the kiss. (we ended up talking about life/school/small talk ****)

 

[AlexLefty]

Just relax dude. You're taking yourself too seriously.

I think a common fallacy in game is that you need to hook up with a girl or you're a failure. Not the case. If this girl becomes your best friend, that's just as good. Anyways, my point is you need to learn to just chill. Relax and just hangout. You don't always have to be doing something. Sometimes it's nice to just chillax and enjoy each other's company. Relax and just hang out man. Trust me, if you stop taking yourself so seriously you can have fun no matter what you're doing.

In regards to freezing up when kissing and stuff, my advice is the same. Just chill. Kissing a girl is as easy as making eye contact, putting your hand on her chin, and kissing her. Chill, and be congruent with yourself. If you're congruent with your actions (have a strong identity) whatever you're doing will be acceptable. If you really need a line before you kiss her use this: "On a scale of 1 to 10, how good of a kisser are you?" *She Responds* "Hmm" *Go in for the kiss*.

 

[DivinityCove]

You make some good points I need to stop worrying about the outcome so much, I guess i have a lot of pressure from my friends to hook up with this chick that i like.

They said **** like "Was the conversation between you two sexual at all?"
Which made me over think stuff because the conversation really WASN'T sexual at all.

 

[AlexLefty]

Another fallacy.

There doesn't necessarily need to be sexual tension between you and a girl for a girl to be attracted to you. Though, I think it is a prerequisite for hooking up.

My point is, she may be attracted to you, even if there has been NO sexual stuff. Just relax, have no agenda, and see how this plays out. If you do this, a natural opportunity to exhibit sexuality will present itself.

 

[DivinityCove]

Alrighty thanks AlexLefty i think theres just alot of overthinking and just comparing what's been going on between me and this chick too other friends of mine.

it's stupid of me to compare

thanks homie

 

[ediceneet12]

Kind of off topic but DivinityCove is your username named off of a Moss Icon song?

 

[BeDour]

I'm going to assume you're of highschool age considering the section.

You make some good points I need to stop worrying about the outcome so much, I guess i have a lot of pressure from my friends to hook up with this chick that i like.

They said **** like "Was the conversation between you two sexual at all?"
Which made me over think stuff because the conversation really WASN'T sexual at all.

Don't listen to your friends. They're asking you **** like that because they just want information. They're living vicariously through you, and they want to hear about your interactions as a means to learn for themselves. But they'll never admit that. So they'll get on your case as a means to distract attention from their lack of getting any girls.

Just chill out and be confident on your dates.

 

[DivinityCove]

^Yeah they give pretty awful advice anyways

anyways thanks for the help guys hopefully when school starts i'll
be able to get more girls to go out with and do **** with

And yeah Ediceneet12 I based my username after a moss icon song haha wouldn't think i'd ever find anyone on this forum who listens to moss icon.