Need a new board

[Lord_Galth]

Hey,
Great sight, I've learned a ton here about getting girls interested, how to be a better man, and how to feel genuinely more confident. But one other thing I've noticed is how there are two radically different camps on this board: STR and LTR people. Becuase there are so many more STR people (primariliy interested in having sex with as many people as possible, which is by no means a bad pursuit) the LTR people tend to be a bit quieter, especially since LTR advice tends to sound afc along side STR advice. (For example, issues of compatablity, actually caring about the personhood of the girl your with, and ... gulp... communication come up... Now, those aren't inherently afc topics, but flamers will jump on anything resembling an afc topic).
Is there anyway we could get a separate board for LTR discussion and advice? Its certainly a valid goal in the pursuit of women, and I'd love to find others who have felt equally silenced as I have.

Thanks,
-LG

 

[Nocturnal]

there's too many problems with this.

if you insist, i might explain them but i dont have the time right now.

 

[Slickster]

I agree completely. What a great idea.

 

[Lord_Galth]

Nocturnal, by too many problems do you mean web-based, logistical problems, or just that you don't agree with LTR's?

I can accept the former, but the later should be open to debate.

-LG

 

[Ofus]

I think seperate catagories in the DJ Bible is enough for STR vs LTR.

 

[Lord_Galth]

I would agree, Ofus, except for the degree of flaming that can be recieved when one starts talking in LTR terms, mostly becuase terminology like "love" and "relationship" and "communication" start to come up. If there can be some action against the flaming I've seen, I'll have no problem recinding my request, but until then, I have to think this would be a good idea

Plus, its simply easier for new dj's to understand the different opinions and goals present on this board.

Anyways, you are of course entitled to your opinion, and I will definitely say I was glad to see the LTR section in the Bible (I don't recall seeing it in the old one),

-LG

 

[SexPDX]

I don't really like the idea. I think the problem lies less in the posters GOALS and more in the fact that the prevailing school of thought here is much too rigid regarding what is or is not "AFC". Now that is a problem that is never really going to go away since it's a very natural phase for newer guys to try to label certain behaviors as AFC so they know what to avoid before they develop the correct attitude.

Originally posted by da dynamically
The divided is evident when you have guys who worship ANTI-DUMP and guys who worship SEXPDX, who happens to think that ANTI-DUMP's methods are too AFC and time-consuming.

The reason why I think Anti-Dump's methods are AFC has nothing to do with the fact that they are time consuming nor is it because a LTR is the goal. There are a lot of MO's I see value in that operate on a less compressed time frame than what I normally encourage. The reason I think it's AFC is that the underlying belief driving the Anti-Dump MO is that how you interact with a woman has no bearing on whether or not she will be attracted to you initially.

The stuff I post, particularly what I post RECENTLY (being genuine, expressive, honest, a good listener, etc.) is ALL valid advice for guys whose goal is a LTR.

Also, how do you classify a guy like ME for example whose goal is to have genuine and lasting connections with the women even though I do not want an EXCLUSIVE relationship?

I think further fragmentation of the forum is a bad thing. That's going to call attention to separations between members that I don't think are really there. They are illusory for the most part (with a few slight exceptions). I don't even think there should really be an "unusual techniques" forum. The only reason I pushed for it at the time it was created was that certain topics were hard to discuss without flame wars and trolling (which may STILL be the case if there was not such a forum but I don't know).

The real problem is the rigidness in thought that goes on here with things like "AFC vs. DJ", thinking that something is either ONE WAY or the OTHER and with no room for interpretation. "LTR vs. STR" is just another example of the same issue.

-PDX

 

[Ofus]

 

[Lord_Galth]

SexPDX, although I generally agree with you, I have to disagree here.

I think your most compelling point was the one about causing further separation amongst members, which is a valid concern, but given the extremely wide degree of crossing over that is done (with the exception being adults posting in the HS forum), I don't think this would detract from any real sense of unity (if there even is one to begin with).

What it will help with, though, is finding and protecting advice geared directly towards LTR's. Most of the dj advice is useful for flirting / attracting women initially and insipiring men to be better men in general. They both help with LTR's, as you said, and I concede that point, but I do think there is a greater divide here than you give credit for. Why is that? Because of the completely different goals (as you said) associated with STR / LTR. Now, there's a great deal of crossover (your goals being a perfect example) but there are a ton of issues that come up in LTR's which NEVER TOUCH an STR, and the goal of a longlasting, loving relationship is quite different from the goal of having as many sexual parterns as possible (to vastly generalize the goals of LTR and STR, again, I know there are lots of exceptions).

So why does this warrant a new board? Well, simply because it is a different category of dj'ing. Nothing's going to stop someone from visiting the main board, tips board, unusual tips board, and LTR board. There are no laws or boarder checks or anything like that. However, given the smaller number of people here seeking LTR's, a separate board would give them access: a) to each other, and b) to each other's support against moronic flamers who hate anything LTR or remotely resembling it. Some dj principals appear in toned down versions in an LTR, simply because of the nature of the beast (unless you want me to I won't go into specifics, I can assume you already know what I'm talking about). Finally, it would make it MUCH MUCH easier for someone specifically interested in LTR advice to get the right kind of advice and also to read the right kind of tips aimed at their goals.

Unless there would be severe logistical difficulties, I don't see any harm, but I can see a number of potential benefits.

Anyways, If there isn't any real support for this I'll let it drop. The site is still quite good for advice, its just a bit tough to syphon out that stuff I dont' want to read (since there's a ton of it) and the stuff that I can genuinely apply to LTR's and the pursuit of them.

Thanks all for responding!

-LG

 

[Lord_Galth]

Take a look at the post in the main discussion forum called "I want a real girlfriend" for a PRIME example of what led me to suggest this new board.

Thanks all for discussing.

Moderators: would this even be possible, logistically speaking?

 

[Bungo Pony]

Well, now that it's been pointed out, I feel the need to add to this since I'm in a LTR.....

I am somewhat split in the decision for a LTR forum. I said this in another thread - LTRs and STRs start off the same way. A LTR is basically an evolved STR.

This statement draws me to this conclusion - if there was a LTR forum, it would have to deal strictly with people who are in LTRs instead of techniques on moving into a LTR, finding the "right girl" for a LTR and such. It would have to strictly deal with LTR issues.

Some of the things that is required in a LTR doesn't even apply to seduction , such as challenge, control (to an extent) and mystery.

I disagree with this statement. These techniques still apply, however they must be applied in different forms rather than the usual methods mentioned on this board.

Also, I see no harm in keeping LTR discussion in the main discussion forum. If some ******* starts whining "why do you want a LTR", the person seeking the advice should have the sense to ignore him and any of his followers.

 

[Lord_Galth]

Moderators, I'd really appreciate your input on this, so I can know whether to just drop it or continue arguing my case.

-LG

 

[Dark Nimbus]

I'm with Lord Garth, I don't even bother posting half the time because the discussion board has degraded to a flame fest the minute you deviate from the almighty DJ Bible/Principles, which as I've said before often change when you're looking for a LTR. There's things I wouldn't say or do in an STR that I would in an LTR, and I don't need a bunch of STR male sluts jumping down my throat when I want to add some input to a poster who's trying to make a long term relationship work.

I think sosuave was/is geared more for initial contact and pick-ups, but it needs to evolve a bit. I also think most of the guys who aren't interested in sleeping with anything that breathes and moves tend to think a bit differently in general, and are often more mature (ha, I know I'm going to get flamed for that one).

A final thing I'd like to add in general, is that I've been here for a while now and have seen the forums get littered with stupid smartass remarks that don't contribute anything and are meant to only tear someone down. There's no respect on here anymore except maybe by the regular posters for the regular posters that have been here for a while, but even many of them are guilty of giving the newbies a hard time and tend to have a pack mentality. I know there's not much that can be done about this short of banning, but maybe some kind of user rating system where say 50 complaints on a poster in a certain span of time results in a temporary ban and a permanent strike 1 on their record, and after 3 strikes they get a permanent ban sort of thing can be done? That way it wouldn't be a burden on the moderators, but the users themselves can take part in cleaning the place up. Just a thought.

 

[Lord_Galth]

I can just see that "3 strikes" system being used by the flammers to boot the people genuinely interested in this site's wellbeing... I say leave it to the moderators.

My basic argument remains the same: There are different considerations, different techniques, different goals, and different problems that arise in an LTR vs an STR; This would seem to suggest a separate category of dj'ing and therefore warrant its own place on the site.

I'd still really like to hear from a moderator, either a "yes, LG you're getting somewhere, we notice your post, get some more support and we'll see..." or a "no we aren't adding another stupid board now shut up..."

Just somethin....
Common Moderators,
you know you want to...

-LG