Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Need a little help with ED issues here guys

oldspice891

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 21, 2009
Messages
42
Reaction score
2
Hopefully, some of you guys have somewhat been in my position and can help me out. Sorry if this is long ahead of time, but here it goes.

I'm 22, have had multiple chances to have sex, but blew it because I couldn't get hard and am still a virgin. I think it started when I was in highschool, I was worried about getting boners when dancing on girls, then it got worse. College I was drunk one night, girl was naked in my bed, and I couldn't get hard. Now it was probably the alcohol.

Fast forward 3 months later, girl is naked in my bed, and my **** is as small as a turtle head. She basically ended up flaking and my confidence relating to sex has been shattered since.

I think I'm avg, like 5.5 to 6 inch. But I feel like I'm more on the extreme side of the grower not a shower.

Anyways, I went to a doctor, explained to him I just wanted like 2 viagra pills, he said dude wtf is wrong with you and refused to give it.

Is there anyway I can buy these online?? Or can anybody mail me a few and I'll paypal you some $$ for it? I'm 100% serious. I'm at wits end here. I srsly don't know what to do anymore, because my mind is STUCK in the loop process of thinking too much about getting a boner and not getting one. I was making out with this amazing hot girl (couldn't believe I got her interested) and I kept worrying about whether I should or shouldn't have a boner.

Also, I bought those pills at the gas station and they're sitting at home, but I'm kind of scared to take them. I was thinking about like splitting a viagra/cialis into 4 pieces and taking one, so my boner is only an hour long? Does it work like that?

Whoo, sorry if that was long. Any help is appreciated dudes. I've been told a lot im cute, i'm pretty confident, I just need to get over this problem so I can become a DJ and smash chicks left and right.
 

Vice

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 23, 2007
Messages
2,010
Reaction score
186
Stop looking at porn. Problem solved.
 

loveshogun

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 19, 2009
Messages
721
Reaction score
35
Nervousness is the anti-poon.

You have to be okay with not having a hard-on. You have to be okay with telling a girl that you don't have a hard-on. Once you can be comfortable in your own body, the boners will appear.

And they will be ****in' epic. In the meantime, use fingers, tongue, etc to get the girl off.

I've had sex with a good number of women for my age. All I can tell you is that if you're cool with being honest about your abilities, the girls are usually equally cool as long as you don't just take a nap on them. It still takes me til the 4th or 5th time sleeping with a girl to get completely comfortable around her, but I let her know up front. Those first three or so times having sex, I work to maintain my erection and usually don't bust a nut at all.

They bust, though. Multiple times. Learn to spell the alphabet with your tongue and put that **** to work. I'm a very aural (audio stimulated) person, so hearing moans while I jerk it helps right before I slip on a condom and slide it in her cooch.

You gotta find what turns you on, and accept your nervousness.
 

AlexDP

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 3, 2011
Messages
416
Reaction score
24
Kegel exercises are also often talked about, maybe you could try those. It's likely because you're nervous, but.. well, it's easy to say, I know, but just don't be. Kiss her, use your hands and mouth, it will come. Relax.
 

oldspice891

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 21, 2009
Messages
42
Reaction score
2
Vice said:
Stop looking at porn. Problem solved.
Good advice. I haven't been looking at porn since October since I moved into a new apt and didn't get internet. I've been checking women out nonstep if I haven't rubbed one out so it has helped.

loveshogun said:
Nervousness is the anti-poon.

You have to be okay with not having a hard-on. You have to be okay with telling a girl that you don't have a hard-on. Once you can be comfortable in your own body, the boners will appear.

And they will be ****in' epic. In the meantime, use fingers, tongue, etc to get the girl off.

I've had sex with a good number of women for my age. All I can tell you is that if you're cool with being honest about your abilities, the girls are usually equally cool as long as you don't just take a nap on them. It still takes me til the 4th or 5th time sleeping with a girl to get completely comfortable around her, but I let her know up front. Those first three or so times having sex, I work to maintain my erection and usually don't bust a nut at all.

They bust, though. Multiple times. Learn to spell the alphabet with your tongue and put that **** to work. I'm a very aural (audio stimulated) person, so hearing moans while I jerk it helps right before I slip on a condom and slide it in her cooch.

You gotta find what turns you on, and accept your nervousness.
This is a great post thanks man. I guess I've been nervous because I'm a grower not a shower?? So when I don't have anything, it's even more embarrassing. I guess I got to open my mind and look at life grand scheme of things and let it not worry me so much. I'm going to try, I'm just still a little scared if I go to have sex again, and jr. isn't working...it's just a bad situation for both parties..and I'd had to find a girl I really like, she's expecting something good, but she gets a 22 virgin with ED issues LOL. Thanks for the post though.

shizz702 said:
Get some cialis, problem solved.
Yeah dude I went to a Dr. but he just said I should wait til marriage...obviously not a help. Do you know where I could get some..or like I said, if anyone has even just 1 pill, 1!, mail it and I'll paypal you. I'll split it into pieces.

AlexDP said:
Kegel exercises are also often talked about, maybe you could try those. It's likely because you're nervous, but.. well, it's easy to say, I know, but just don't be. Kiss her, use your hands and mouth, it will come. Relax.
Thanks man I'll try. Sometimes it happens but when its coming down to it, my mind gets in this loop that is hard to break you know?

okyoureabeast said:
A lot of ED problems are psychological and not medical related.

It sounds like you're crazy nervous and lack confidence. I'd say focus entirelly on pleasing her. Lots and lots of foreplay.

I had a different problem of going too early. When I stopped focusing on myself and pleasing my girl, that did wonders for making me last longer.
That's a good suggestion thanks. Maybe instead of just thinking "ok this feels good shouldn't i be getting a boner right now" all the time..I should focus completely on her..I guess worst case I get ED again...atleast she got some pleasure out of it??? sounds like a good plan
 

Warrior74

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 25, 2008
Messages
5,128
Reaction score
228
Relax. If you get a boner so what. Boners happen, chicks know that. When it comes to having sex. Slow down. Waaaay down. Double way down. Draw out forplay and that way you give yourself time to relax and you give her time to warm up.

Cut porn. Cut fast food. Cut alcohol except for when you are on a date. Don't get shytfaced. Exercise to burn off nervous energy. And learn to get outside your head.
 

Lexington

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 23, 2008
Messages
1,258
Reaction score
70
You sound like you're pretty healthy and you don't have the type of medical conditions hat would cause you to have ED at your age. It's almost certainly psychological.

Do you have trouble getting hard when watching your favorite porn? I remember a few years ago I couldn't get laid to save my life. When I finally had enough game to get girls naked in bed, to my astonishment I couldn't get hard. Yet, I could get hard as a rock when watching porn.

I would advise refraining from porn. If you jerk it, jerk it to your imagination only. Also you have to learn to relax. It's mostly a nervousness issue. The key is to not think about the act....just enjoy it without analyzing it.

After you get a few more girls in the sack, you'll lose your nervousness. If you fvck up a couple of times, don't worry about it.
 

bilboteabaggins

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 6, 2011
Messages
185
Reaction score
5
loveshogun said:
Nervousness is the anti-poon.

You have to be okay with not having a hard-on. You have to be okay with telling a girl that you don't have a hard-on. Once you can be comfortable in your own body, the boners will appear.

And they will be ****in' epic. In the meantime, use fingers, tongue, etc to get the girl off.

I've had sex with a good number of women for my age. All I can tell you is that if you're cool with being honest about your abilities, the girls are usually equally cool as long as you don't just take a nap on them. It still takes me til the 4th or 5th time sleeping with a girl to get completely comfortable around her, but I let her know up front. Those first three or so times having sex, I work to maintain my erection and usually don't bust a nut at all.

They bust, though. Multiple times. Learn to spell the alphabet with your tongue and put that **** to work. I'm a very aural (audio stimulated) person, so hearing moans while I jerk it helps right before I slip on a condom and slide it in her cooch.

You gotta find what turns you on, and accept your nervousness.
epic!!! listen to this

stop caring what b!tches think and things will happen, learn to master the tongue and fingers and hell... throw a dildo in, just don't be lickin on nasty sluts, don't know where that things been :nono:
 

KarmaSutra

Banned
Joined
Oct 13, 2005
Messages
4,827
Reaction score
143
Age
50
Location
Padron Reserve maduro in hand while finishing my b
If you're able to blow chode while watching Jenna Haze get DP'd, there's nothing physically wrong with your junk.

My guess is a combination of confidence and a lack of appreciating your sexuality.

LoveShogun and I are on the same page with this. It's your fear of failing which breaks your bone. Sex is not about pushing in-and-out. It's about exploring the side the Gods have granted as a means to your spiritual purity.

Stop equating sex with fvcking. Read into Tantra and sex magick practices. Donald Michael Kraig's: Modern Sex Magick is a well written overview and starter.

Don't beat yourself up about size either. I'm hung like a third grade Chinese boy. My brother got his and mine. I've made sweet lovin' with many women, of differing levels of sexual confidence and experience. Not one has made any comment on it, except "Oh my God, your c0ck is perfect."

I may not hit the bottom, but I'm knockin' the fvck outta the walls.
 

Htienvu

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jan 2, 2011
Messages
319
Reaction score
6
Never get too pissed, effects your ability to keep it up! As I found out twice, had to wait till the morning to get it performing.
 

oldspice891

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 21, 2009
Messages
42
Reaction score
2
I gotta say all of your replies have been very helpful guys thanks!
Warrior74 said:
Relax. If you get a boner so what. Boners happen, chicks know that. When it comes to having sex. Slow down. Waaaay down. Double way down. Draw out forplay and that way you give yourself time to relax and you give her time to warm up.

Cut porn. Cut fast food. Cut alcohol except for when you are on a date. Don't get shytfaced. Exercise to burn off nervous energy. And learn to get outside your head.
For sure great advice. I was usually taking foreplay slowly but I guess I overthought that and going too slow might show inexperience? I donno. Great advice though. Definitely need to slow down thanks.

Lexington said:
You sound like you're pretty healthy and you don't have the type of medical conditions hat would cause you to have ED at your age. It's almost certainly psychological.

Do you have trouble getting hard when watching your favorite porn? I remember a few years ago I couldn't get laid to save my life. When I finally had enough game to get girls naked in bed, to my astonishment I couldn't get hard. Yet, I could get hard as a rock when watching porn.

I would advise refraining from porn. If you jerk it, jerk it to your imagination only. Also you have to learn to relax. It's mostly a nervousness issue. The key is to not think about the act....just enjoy it without analyzing it.

After you get a few more girls in the sack, you'll lose your nervousness. If you fvck up a couple of times, don't worry about it.
You know what..that is what I realized. I haven't been watching porn since October, maybe every so often..but I'm most of the time spanking it to imagining bonking the girls I like. I pretty much quit it, but until then, all throughout my teens I jerked it pretty much everyday..and porn became hard-wired to my brain. I notice I pop harder wood to porn than I do normally, so even those very rare times I look at it, i'm going to cut it out. great advice man thanks.

bilboteabaggins said:
epic!!! listen to this

stop caring what b!tches think and things will happen, learn to master the tongue and fingers and hell... throw a dildo in, just don't be lickin on nasty sluts, don't know where that things been :nono:
that made me laugh but its so true! lol thanks man

KarmaSutra said:
If you're able to blow chode while watching Jenna Haze get DP'd, there's nothing physically wrong with your junk.

My guess is a combination of confidence and a lack of appreciating your sexuality.

LoveShogun and I are on the same page with this. It's your fear of failing which breaks your bone. Sex is not about pushing in-and-out. It's about exploring the side the Gods have granted as a means to your spiritual purity.

Stop equating sex with fvcking. Read into Tantra and sex magick practices. Donald Michael Kraig's: Modern Sex Magick is a well written overview and starter.

Don't beat yourself up about size either. I'm hung like a third grade Chinese boy. My brother got his and mine. I've made sweet lovin' with many women, of differing levels of sexual confidence and experience. Not one has made any comment on it, except "Oh my God, your c0ck is perfect."

I may not hit the bottom, but I'm knockin' the fvck outta the walls.
Amazing post man thank you. I do have that fear I guess. It happened before, and I felt pretty bad about it, so I fear it happening again. I'll look that up.

I guess I feel bad because before I've hooked up with girls, they play up the sex act and want to know my history..I have to lie basically, and they play this whole thing up to what it should be and how I should rock their socks off..and it makes me nervous because i KNOW i'm not going to be THAT good..so I guess that's my fear.

Htienvu said:
Never get too pissed, effects your ability to keep it up! As I found out twice, had to wait till the morning to get it performing.
Yeah I just gotta relax



This thread has been really helpful thanks again guys. I'm definitely going to read this before I bed a girl next time to hopefully overcome this.
 

OC Speedball

Don Juan
Joined
Mar 8, 2011
Messages
199
Reaction score
10
All my friends could not get hard when they lost their virginity. They had to have the girl give them a blow job. Don't worry, you're normal.

The first time I got naked with a girl it was cold outside and I was nervous. My d!ck was tiny. It was embarassing. I'm a grower too, so it's normally about 4 inches soft and 7.6 inches erect. But sometimes it gets like 3 inches small when it's freezing or I'm wearing tight clothing.

Relax and have her give you a blow job. You will get an erection.
 

the_stig

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 30, 2010
Messages
467
Reaction score
56
Location
Central Time Zone
All in your head. I've had (have) similiar problems and it's 100% psychological.

It started the night I lost my virginity. I was nervous and lacked self confidence, didn't like the way I looked, was worried about my ability to perform, if I could please her, etc. It caused me to lose my erection, and took several weeks for me to be comfortable enough around that girl to maintain it during sex. That procees repeated itself with every girl I was with during that time.

Fast forward 5 years... I've lost 50 lbs, am in the best shape of my life, can attract more girls in a week than I did in the past five years and my problem has mostly cured itself. However there are still times when that thought (fear) of losing my erection still enters my head and when it does, it's a guarantee I will.

Moral of all this.. don't think about trying to get an erection, just let it happen. It's that simple.
 

Leporello

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 18, 2003
Messages
958
Reaction score
13
Location
DC
Kegels are a good idea. So is abandoning porn. Make sure you get plenty of sleep.

This experience might be a good opportunity for you to re-order yourself. Introduce a regular exercise regime. Practice meditation or another form of stress relief These things can have benefits for the rest of your life.

In the meantime, if you want an immediate solution (and don't want to order pills from some shady online dealer) just go to your nearest GNC and get some Yohimbe. I've tried a myriad of herbal crap for various reasons and that's the only one that i think really helps with ED. Take it on your own to see how it affects you, then try it with a girl.
 

FairShake

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 8, 2008
Messages
2,447
Reaction score
311
That sucks. What you need to find is a GOOD woman who will understand and work through this sh!t. One night stands will keep failing and reinforcing your nervousness.
 
Top