Meeting my f--kbuddy's father. I think it's a terrible idea. Your thoughts?

[The_Reaper]

We hang out, sleep together, and see each other roughly once a week. She has become far too emotionally invested, and I feel a little trapped. I don't want to hurt her.

So far, a year later, I have not met her father. Here's the snag: she so badly wants us to be girlfriend-boyfriend, that she's strongly given this impression to her friends, and her parents.

Edit: I have explained to her that we are not a couple

I don't want to meet the guy, because that reinforces the idea of us being a couple (I am entirely unwilling to do that - I am single, and non-exclusive), and if he starts asking questions, he might be able to see through me (that his beloved daughter is my ***-receptacle).

She's currently living at home, and I never visit her when her parents are there. She often gets her dad to drop her to my apartment though.

Bah. Any thoughts?

 

[The Inside Man]

You REAP what you sow. You let her think that because it's easier to get your rocks off. A year? Wow, you're really good at manipulating people. Go you. Good luck with your situ

 

[PlaysToWin]

So she's falling for you and you are manipulating this to get sex? And you're only concern with this father incident is with you getting caught? And yet you claim to not want to hurt her?

Be a man and dump her. She doesn't deserve this.

 

[prairiedog24]

So she's falling for you and you are manipulating this to get sex? And you're only concern with this father incident is with you getting caught? And yet you claim to not want to hurt her?

Be a man and dump her. She doesn't deserve this.

What he said.

 

[Julius_Seizeher]

It doesn't strike you weird as fvck that her DAD is dropping her off to have sex with you?

I recently met a FBs dad, after our night of drinking he wants me to be his financial advisor, but I think he knows we are casual FBs.

 

[sandman6991]

Why is everyone so quick to criticize here? Nowhere in his post did I get the impression that he was manipulating this girl. If the OP hasn't lied about his intentions and said that he is open to an exclusive relationship with this girl (which, judging by his post, he hasn't said anything like that), then there's nothing wrong with this situation.

 

[thedude4242]

dude keep having sex and fun with her. you must be doing something right if she likes you all like that and gives you sex. you know how many men cannot get any sex at all and getting rid of her would be stupit until you find your next piece if you care to.

 

[SchoolBoy]

Does she know that your intentions with her are strictly for sex and not anything more?

The only problem I see is that she may have the impression you guys are in a exclusive relationship and told her father the same.

If you don't want to meet him, then don't meet him. It's your choice.

 

[prairiedog24]

Why is everyone so quick to criticize here? Nowhere in his post did I get the impression that he was manipulating this girl. If the OP hasn't lied about his intentions and said that he is open to an exclusive relationship with this girl (which, judging by his post, he hasn't said anything like that), then there's nothing wrong with this situation.

Because it's pretty obvious that he isn't making it clear enough to her, because no matter what he's said if she still doesn't get it, clear enough is walking.

How is this any different, and any better, than when women lead guys on forever in the friend zone? How many threads on this forum literally DESTROY women for doing this as pure evil and selfish?

I bet if you ask 100% of those girls we rip on would say "oh, but we never lied about our intentions..." In fact, I bet they said and did things that TO THEM were clear. The point wasn't about whether it was clear to them. The point is whether it's clear to the other person.

Just like females know damn well when they're leading men on. Men know damn well when they're leading women on.

I don't care what this guy has told her. Perhaps he even has been reasonably clear. The fact is, this girl isn't getting it and is getting emotionally wrapped up. If he has no plans on being with her the right thing to do is walk away and not lead her on.

 

[PlaysToWin]

I thought being a DJ was all about getting girls by being a better more confident more self assured person, being more fun to be around, building attraction with women. "Leave the girl better than you found her." Etc.

Is that the kind of thing we want to encourage on these forums? Lying, manipulating and preying on emotional vulnerability on women to get what we want without consideration for them? (Not all directed at the OP, I've just seen it a lot in other recent threads as well)

 

[The_Reaper]

Why is everyone so quick to criticize here? Nowhere in his post did I get the impression that he was manipulating this girl. If the OP hasn't lied about his intentions and said that he is open to an exclusive relationship with this girl (which, judging by his post, he hasn't said anything like that), then there's nothing wrong with this situation.

Thank you. Yes, she knows the situation - I explained everything in explicit terms. She said she agrees under the condition that I tell her about any other girl I get involved with, "even just a kiss".

 

[The_Reaper]

Because it's pretty obvious that he isn't making it clear enough to her, because no matter what he's said if she still doesn't get it, clear enough is walking.

How is this any different, and any better, than when women lead guys on forever in the friend zone? How many threads on this forum literally DESTROY women for doing this as pure evil and selfish?

I bet if you ask 100% of those girls we rip on would say "oh, but we never lied about our intentions..." In fact, I bet they said and did things that TO THEM were clear. The point wasn't about whether it was clear to them. The point is whether it's clear to the other person.

Just like females know damn well when they're leading men on. Men know damn well when they're leading women on.

I don't care what this guy has told her. Perhaps he even has been reasonably clear. The fact is, this girl isn't getting it and is getting emotionally wrapped up. If he has no plans on being with her the right thing to do is walk away and not lead her on.

That's a pretty good post. Hmmmmm

 

[CaptainJ]

I thought being a DJ was all about getting girls by being a better more confident more self assured person, being more fun to be around, building attraction with women. "Leave the girl better than you found her." Etc.

Is that the kind of thing we want to encourage on these forums? Lying, manipulating and preying on emotional vulnerability on women to get what we want without consideration for them? (Not all directed at the OP, I've just seen it a lot in other recent threads as well)

NEVER FEAR GIRLS! CAPTAIN SAVE A HO IS HERE!

Where the hell did you get that he was lying, manipulating and preying on her emotional vulnerability from?
He has stuck to the rules of the DJ strictly: Rule: Always be honest and tell the girl what your situation is eg. Purely sex.

Is he lying? NON MONSIEUR. Is he manipulating? If you call the laws of attraction manipulation, then you should just go back to captain save a ho'sville. Is he preying on her emotional vulnerability? NO, he just said that she was investing way too much emotion, which is what he did not want.

I laugh at all the wannabe DJs that come on here and abuse a guy because he has actually, god forbid it, attracted a girl to him! Something you wannabes only dream of. The only person to blame here is the girl for getting to emotionally invested in him even when he has laid down the rules, she is trying to break them.

To the OP, what I advise is, do not see her father, it sounds like a trap to try and get you to commit. I also advise stop seeing this girl so much or cut her loose altogether before she goes coocoo. Fvck buddies have a shelf life before they go off and start going nuts for you demanding more, I think she is at the end of her shelf life.

 

[PlaysToWin]

NEVER FEAR GIRLS! CAPTAIN SAVE A HO IS HERE!

I already said I wasn't talking specifically about the OP. What's with the theatrics?

 

[The_Reaper]

CaptainJ got it right. Thanks for the input.

And yeah, I think her "shelf life" has expired - as horribly cruel and dehumanising as that sounds. I'll continue with caution and with the end in mind.

 

[prairiedog24]

I laugh at all the wannabe DJs that come on here and abuse a guy because he has actually, god forbid it, attracted a girl to him! Something you wannabes only dream of. The only person to blame here is the girl for getting to emotionally invested in him even when he has laid down the rules, she is trying to break them.

To the OP, what I advise is, do not see her father, it sounds like a trap to try and get you to commit. I also advise stop seeing this girl so much or cut her loose altogether before she goes coocoo. Fvck buddies have a shelf life before they go off and start going nuts for you demanding more, I think she is at the end of her shelf life.

Dude. You just advised the same thing I did. Despite your ravings and accusations about "abusing someone because a girl is attracted to him" (wtf? lol) I didn't accuse him of screwing up. You totally missed the point. I said even if he was clear, the point is the girl isn't getting it, thus he owes it to her and himself to move on. It's not about passing blame around, it's about fixing the situation. So why whine about blame?

All that is is a more mature way of saying...

I also advise stop seeing this girl so much or cut her loose altogether before she goes coocoo. Fvck buddies have a shelf life before they go off and start going nuts for you demanding more, I think she is at the end of her shelf life.

So apparently we agree.

 

[CaptainJ]

Dude. You just advised the same thing I did. Despite your ravings and accusations about "abusing someone because a girl is attracted to him" (wtf? lol) I didn't accuse him of screwing up. You totally missed the point. I said even if he was clear, the point is the girl isn't getting it, thus he owes it to her and himself to move on. It's not about passing blame around, it's about fixing the situation. So why whine about blame?

All that is is a more mature way of saying...

So apparently we agree.

Err... I hadn't even noticed your point mate, and it's not directed at you in anyway. Comprehension skills seem to be lacking around these parts.