match.com suggestions?

[ogre]

Latinoman,
I agree that men use the net to get dates are generally losers. However, wouldn't that be true of the women as well? Who are they to judge?

 

[Latinoman]

Latinoman,
I agree that men use the net to get dates are generally losers. However, wouldn't that be true of the women as well? Who are they to judge?

Women and men are different. Once you realize that, you will start realizing that equality is okay in the job. But when it comes to relationships, we are not the same. One is over 70% emotional and the other about 30% emotional.

Most women do it out of desperation (e.g. single mothers). Others, because they want to screen men easier (although, ignoring the fact that they are in REAL LIFE more observant than men). And many women want to avoid the flood of men hitting on them. Others, because they are fooled into believing that there some scientific formula designed to pair them with the right guy.

The ones that post there won't judge you...unless they sense desperation or some other thing from your profile. In fact, I'm the one with the judgments.

 

[Vulpine]

vulpine: of any of the ho's you said "no thanks" to, did any of them write back?

I can try the "it's not polite to ignore thing" - but will that actually get the chicks to come around or does it just serve to feed your ego?

Alright, I don't like sharing some of my diabolical tactics sometimes, but I did it anyway. Yes, virtually every woman you bust for ignoring will reply. It will shock you how quickly, too.

Online dating is severely in favor of women and caters to the "add to cart" dating approach. Moreover, it feeds the "Sex in the City" attitude.

When you pop chicks for having an ugly attitude (a la ignoring), it totally steals the ball from them and you get to play keep away. "Oooh, lookie lookie! I've got the frame now! That's right, b!tch, I'm the boss. You've got some e'splainin' to do, Lucy."

Sure, it feeds my ego. But a brush with reality every now and then does women some good.

When you walk up to a person and start talking to them, is it ok to not acknowledge them?

No.

That's unacceptable behaviour right off the bat, and I give them both barrels for it:
"You're off to a bad start with me."

See? With one sentence you can steal the frame. Try it.

 

[Latinoman]

dude when you meet a girl from the internet, you DO need to DJ her in real life, the ONLY thing the internet is being used for here is to say the initial hello........all the rest is REAL LIFE - so you lose your point there about how ist not dj'ing if its not the real life, because it IS the real life

NO ONE is talking about having a cyber date or a cyber gf buddy lol

My point is and will continue to be:

In real life...most women will notice you WAY BEFORE you even notice her. And based on how you behave PRIOR to noticing her...will have a serious impact on her reaction (e.g. shutting you down or allowing you to talk).

On-line...you are taking that ability from her. On-line, you might have to B.S. your way into making her believe you are worthy (note: a non-DJ approach on itself) of her giving you a chance for a date.

You see the difference? A DJ does not try to convince anyone for a date. On-line you have too (DJ or not). You have to convince her to share her number with you. You have to convince her to email you. You have to _____.

In real life...if you know what you are doing...you don't need that crap.

I'm not advocating against on-line dating. My point is...it is NOT a DJ approach. Unless you are using it to add to your plate collection to spin OR you are going through a drought and need a quick laid.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

dude when you meet a girl from the internet, you DO need to DJ her in real life, the ONLY thing the internet is being used for here is to say the initial hello........all the rest is REAL LIFE ...

Good point. The Net is a literal buffet of possibilities and could be time well spent during your lunch hour to set up dates. However not all sites are created equal. There are those which are mostly of AWs and others that have a good number of people who want to take things offline. If you have good qualification skills they're easy to discern.

 

[Latinoman]

I thought a Dj is Don Juan aka seducer of women aka it doesnt matter HOW he meets them, what matters is the end result - either fvcking them or having them fall for you and ending up in some kind of relationship

the APPROACH does not make the DJ, its the END RESULT that makes the DJ

Anyone can phuck. Anyone can get laid. In fact, MOST AFCs would get laid...but very few have control of their lives. A DJ has control of his life.


So, actually...you thought wrong. Which is okay, considering that you are only 22 years old.

You are narrowing the definion of a DJ into some kind of man that seduces women. That's in essense a PUA or even a PLAYER. Both of their lives revolve around women. Hardly a DJ (DJs lives revolve around themselves).

There LOT of players and puas out there. Only a fraction of DJs.

A DJ is a man that has control of himself and understands his environment. That goes beyond "seducing women" and expands into your career, health/fitness, and social group.

The way you carry yourself is what determines how much of a DJ you are.

You see? The fact that you go into a room and a woman noticed you before you noticed her...makes you realize that you MUST be a DJ 24/7. Do you know why? Because the person that noticed you could be a woman today...and tomorrow could be a potential client...and the day after tomorrow could be a partner...or a guy that is going to offer you a job.

You don't learn that by sitting in your asz in front of a computer. You learn that by LIVING in control of your life.

Anyone can phuck. Anyone can get laid.

 

[Latinoman]

Good point. The Net is a literal buffet of possibilities and could be time well spent during your lunch hour to set up dates. However not all sites are created equal. There are those which are mostly of AWs and others that have a good number of people who want to take things offline. If you have good qualification skills they're easy to discern.

You are one of the very few people that get it. Another one is my buddy that I wrote about early.

Both of you would not have problems meeting women in real life environments. But rely of the convenience of the internet to get a few plates spinning and a date here and there.

But lot of men (AFC and the like) would make that their number one source. Internet, IMO, is okay to SUPPLEMENT. It is like...the green beans in a Steak and Potato meal.

 

[Latinoman]

no Latinoman - DJ is SPECIFICALLY revolved around getting women, u keep forgetting that a DON JUAN is one who seduces, ****s and has women all over him - it totally has nothing to do with how he leads his life or how much he has his shyt together

what you are thinking of is just simply that - being successful in life, career, social group ect.........the term don juan is STRICLY referrin to women and women only

dont get your terms mixed up

by the way not anyone can fvck or get laid, look at the poll in the main discussion about how many virgins are actually on sosuave.......

You are confusing a Playa and Pua with a DJ.

ANYONE can get laid. Very few can have controls over their lives.

Do you know what you need to get laid?
The ability to LIE.

If you know how to lie...then you will get laid. Plain and simple.

But...you will always live a lie. You will be pretending to be somebody you are NOT.


LOT of women out there cheating on their boyfriends. LOT of PUAS out there without the ability to hold a relationship together. Do you think those men are DJs? They are not even real "m"en in my eyes.

A man can get laid 30 times in one year...but if that same man is a failure when he finally gets into a relationship...then that man is NOT a DJ. That man was always a fake.

To put it in perspective...I can get laid ANYTIME I want. All I have to do is either go to nightclubs or join some Internet Forum. As it is, I don't even have Internet in my house. Disconnected as soon as I moved from my ex-house. Do you know why? Because I want my free time to be focus on my kids and my real life stuff. Also, because I have reach a stage in my life where I am very picky on the type of women I want.

I walked out of my wife (a good one) and did it without any regrets. I choose to be in a relationship with a woman that I met while taking public transportation. A woman that end up offering me her cell phone, work number, and email. I offered NOTHING in return. If she dumps me...I know that it won't be long before I can get another woman.

Do you know how that feels? Having control of my life?

Seducing a woman? ANYONE can seduce a woman. Women are so used to AFCs that she might even get intimidated by the presence of a real DJ.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

from what i know, myspace is for 14 - 22 age group, match.com is for 22+?

also sites like buddypic.com are good for yougn people, just as faceparty.com and thedilly.com are good for 18+ people

when ur in ur 30s tho and still using the internet, then i dunno about that one

I plan to be steadily and happily married by the time im 30

Unfortunately it's not as easy as saying that certain sites are for certain age ranges. The differentiation is more about what the person's needs are. I see MySpace as more for personal marketing based on the need for popularity. People create their pages in the hopes of getting tons of hits and a huge friend list. This could explain the actions of the women on this site.

At its face, it would make sense that it would be alluring to just teenagers and very young adults. However, that need may be easily shared by people in other age ranges thus why it can't be precluded that sites are specifically for an age range.

 

[ogre]

Latinoman,

this isn't helping. I can't get laid. I can't lie either. and I can't be what I ain't.
I have no prob meeting women in real life, but for some reason I have a harder time on the net, not easier. still, regardless of where I meet them, I have trouble getting past the initial meeting and into the bed. Somehow that inner desparation comes out, no matter how hard I try to hide or control it. women can tell. and when they smell it they just flake on me. happens every time. only way to kill the desparation is to get laid. but the very thing I need to cure me of the desparation is the very thing I can't get. Maybe there is something in my profile that smells of desparation? I dunno... I seen some other men's profiles, and they are so plain vanilla boring that they make me wanna vomit. I woulda thought that I would get more play on Match just by default. but instead I am getting less than average. Same thing on myspace or craigslist. btw I have 668 friends on myspace and have a loyal following for my political writing. But has it helped me get laid? Noooooo...... I got a few dates but not one single pu$$y. I had a girl (from myspace) drive 3 hrs just to stay with me for a weekend, she slept in my bed for 2 nights but she wasn't putting out. That was the most action I've had for years.

anyway here is (in part) my latest version on match. what do you think?


I don't know how to play head games, so I don't try. Please don't play them on me as it'll just give me an anxiety attack. I am open, honest, and I come with instructions. In spite of my unconventional interests I am quite old-fashioned when it comes to relationships and easy to please. Just give me a good massage after a day's battle and make me some fresh squeezed orange juice in the morning and I'm happy. Yes I also give excellent massages, but as with anything else, don't expect to receive if you're not wanting to give.

anything bad? good? change?

 

[AgonyUncle]

Online dating has its benefits. I don’t have time to go out and meet women in general. Im up at 6, gym at 6:30. Im at work at 8. Done at 5. I play football twice a week, cricket once, martial arts twice. I am also busy with my degree through correspondence. Im at the age where going to a nightclub and trying to hook up has become a pain in the ass. I don’t have the time, and my lifestyle does not put me in front of enough women. I have been using it for the last few months, and its been a really useful addition to my sex life.

Online dating allows me to be more selective. I can screen chicks based on looks (although, pics they post quite often don’t match em at all) I can also gauge how intelligent the woman is, and if she appears to be independent enough that I wont have to worry about a needy clingy bat who does not understand that I don’t have time for a relationship. Online dating should never be a substitute for real life situations, but it is an additional alternative if you don’t have time to chase skirt all day long. If you cant qualify a woman based on a profile and a few emails, then online dating is going to be frustrating for you. Honestly, most of the women who are online are single moms, nutters, UG’s or, and this is who you are targeting WOMEN WHO ARE JUST AS BUSY OR DON’T WANT TO SPEND THIR WHOLE LIFE HITTING CLUBS EVERY TIME THEY WANT TO GET RAILED.

Online dating is given a hard time here because

a) Some fellas here really love the chase. Sorry lads, the chase is all well and good, but I was done with that macking crap when I left college. I don’t have time to play games with anyone, let alone some bird whose only purpose in my life will be sex and company from time to time when I have a gap
b) People need to realize that if you are a chump offline, going online is not going to solve your problem. You need to find some game. 100 approaches please. Grow some balls before you go online or get owned like the rest of them

ok, I have this in my profile..... what do you all think:

for fun:
Medieval swordfighting. Chivalry is very much alive. Your Knight in Shining Armor beckons you. Will you answer the call?

my education:

Post-Graduate with Honors from U.H.K. (University of Hard Knocks) And currently working on my dissertation on Life, the Universe, and Everything. Aum...

favorite hot spots:

My place! JK... seriously, though, someplace quiet where you can see stars at night.....

Dude, take what I am going to say as advice. You are a knob. What chick with half a brain is going to want to spend time with you when you have basically spouted poetry, and clichéd garbage. Jesus pal, woman want to have FUN when they go out with you. They want to know that you are going to put a smile on their face and not be so concerned about whether or not you need their approval. You can see right through that crap. You want to get laid online? BE MORE FRANK ABOUT IT. Oliver twist asked for some more. You would have given half your soup to the fat girl cause she smiled at you.

Add some personality to your profile FFS. My first profile included a breakdown of the perfect woman. A mute monogamous Spanish (I like my paella) nymphomaniac who likes to wash her mans car and cook up a storm after a he has had a hard day watching football. His and hers season tickets will seal the deal. Oh, and a passion for the WWF is non negotiable.

If any of these traits are lacking, then a cash alternative needs to be provided

Did it work? It did quite well considering its so utterly ridiculous. . But you would be surprised how many woman thought it was different and I may be fun to hang out with if nothing else. Im not saying be a clown, Im just saying you need to seriously consider the fact that you are coming across as a homosexual with that crap

 

[ogre]

AgonyUncle,

Wait.... I really do medieval swordfighting. I got rid of "Your Knight in Shining Armor beckons you. Will you answer the call?" though. it sounded lame to me too.

I don't give a crap about football or wwf. and I'm not into cars. I have a beat-up chevy van which I never wash and a few old motorcycles.

what about the other stuff? favorite places? education? what's wrong with that?

I am coming across as queer? wow, that's bad.

what about my current entry - did you miss that?:

I don't know how to play head games, so I don't try. Please don't play them on me as it'll just give me an anxiety attack. I am open, honest, and I come with instructions. In spite of my unconventional interests I am quite old-fashioned when it comes to relationships and easy to please. Just give me a good massage after a day's battle and make me some fresh squeezed orange juice in the morning and I'm happy. Yes I also give excellent massages, but as with anything else, don't expect to receive if you're not wanting to give.

anything wrong with it?

perhaps I should say something like this?:

My ideal woman is a monagamous nymphomaniac who loves to massage and makes me breakfast. But if you really want to impress me, do an oil change on my Chevy

 

[Sinistar]

My ideal woman is a monagamous nymphomaniac who loves to massage and makes me breakfast. But if you really want to impress me, do an oil change on my Chevy

A woman wrote the underlined parts for you right?

Alright, its friday and you asked, how about an AFC Giberish Translation of your most recent paragraph:

I don't know how to play head games, so I don't try. Please don't play them on me as it'll just give me an anxiety attack.

...head games scare me and make me really insecure so I avoid them instead of dealing with them like a man by simply not giving a rip.

I am open, honest, and I come with instructions.

...I am neither a mystery nor a bad boy, I'm am the nice guy that's always getting LJBF'd. I will tell you everything so you won't have to figure it out for yourself and will be able to immediately move on to the first mysterious bad-boy who comes along.

In spite of my unconventional interests I am quite old-fashioned when it comes to relationships and easy to please.

....I have a few different hobbies. I have no relationship experience or confidence and any type of attention I receive will be enough for me.

Just give me a good massage after a day's battle and make me some fresh squeezed orange juice in the morning and I'm happy.

...I'm begging for my first massage after coming home from a regular old job and I've never had fresh squeezed OJ. I'll take anything to make me happy.

Yes I also give excellent massages, but as with anything else, don't expect to receive if you're not wanting to give.

....I'm willing to barter for intimacy if thats what it takes.

Dude, AgonyUncle gave you a great example. Notice, his entire paragraph implies no supplication. Intimacy is confidently and rather covertly implied in a kidding (yet non-pressured) present frame tone. Throughout, he communicates experience & confidence (via assertive expectations) while remaining a mystery. Put simply, his example will come off as fun rather than serious.

And I'd drop the Medieval Sword Fighting thing unless your associated pic comes off as hilariously funny. If so, maybe you can work up a funny bit regarding your desire for a good village wench or two while at the same time thowing in a very confident c0cky jab at all those princesses out there. Maybe you'll find yourself a wench (not always a bad thing!).

 

[drZaius09]

Alright, I don't like sharing some of my diabolical tactics sometimes, but I did it anyway. Yes, virtually every woman you bust for ignoring will reply. It will shock you how quickly, too.... When you walk up to a person and start talking to them, is it ok to not acknowledge them?

No.

That's unacceptable behaviour right off the bat, and I give them both barrels for it:
"You're off to a bad start with me."

See? With one sentence you can steal the frame. Try it.

That may be the CREEPIEST thing I've ever heard on this board... and this board is the world-wide capitol of creepy.

I'm not insulting your approach or anything, it just sounds really creepy and I couldn't ever see myself doing it. Plus I would imagine you'd have to be pretty caught-up on a girl you've never even spoken to in order to even be compelled to have that reaction in the first place.

 

[ogre]

OKAY OKAY I need a serious dose of vitamin T.

Sinistar, your line-be-line translation is good stuff. thank you. keep it coming.

Here is the latest version (before I read your advice):

for fun:
Medieval swordfighting. Football is for sissies.


favorite hot spots:

My place! ... Seriously, though, someplace quiet where you can see stars at night. It doesn't really matter where you go in this whole wide world, as long as you recognize the person you woke up with (¡Oh mi Dios! ¿Quién es?!?)


and in the intro section:

I don't know how to play head games, So don't play them on me. You'll just give me an anxiety attack. I am honest, open, and I come with instructions. In spite of my unconventional interests I am quite easy to please when it comes to relationships. Just be a monogamous nymphomaniac who likes to cook and gives great massages and I'm happy. But if you really wanna impress me, do an oil change on my chevy.

I agree the first half of that makes me look like a child. I'll see what I can do about a revision. Maybe I should just keep the 2nd half?

no a woman did not write the underlined part. u funny. I really like massage and I like home-cooking. a good woman who wants to keep her man will do these things. is that somehow a problem?

what is LJBF'd? (sorry I don't know all the terms....)

 

[ogre]

Never mind got it "let's just be friends"

actually what usually happens with me is worse then that - it usually ends up "don't call me anymore"

here is my latest version - but it's not funny. I think her reaction will be "Fawk You A$$h0le" but it's the gawddam truth

I connect best with someone who is cereberal, creative, eclectic, out of the mainstream, edge of the matrix. I don't go with the flow. I turn the tide. Rebels, outcasts, visionaries and misfits all welcome. These are not requirements, just suggestions. You need not think in 4-5 dimensions, at least 3 would be sufficient. Even so, intellectual discourse is all very nice, but if you want to keep me happy, be a monogamous nymphomaniac who loves to cook and gives great massages. This is non-negotiable, at least for those of you who say you want "commitment".

 

[Latinoman]

I went to a nightclub last weekend (after several months of not doing the club scene - I have a girlfriend, busy schedule, etc.). My goodness! HUGE change in a matter of months.

No wonder some Men are trying to avoid the club scene as much as possible. It is becoming pathetic.

 

[Vulpine]

That may be the CREEPIEST thing I've ever heard on this board... and this board is the world-wide capitol of creepy.

I'm not insulting your approach or anything, it just sounds really creepy and I couldn't ever see myself doing it. Plus I would imagine you'd have to be pretty caught-up on a girl you've never even spoken to in order to even be compelled to have that reaction in the first place.

The thing is, Dr., women that do online dating are flooded by hundreds of mushy, sappy, cheesy e-mails from hundreds of scumbag guys. I've made mine stand out in the fact that I don't cater to their AW'ness, and let them now off the bat that I don't tollerate disrespect.

Now, their are two types of replies: the b!tchy ones (you're an azzhole), and the apologetic ones (I'm sorry, I've been really busy lately.) You follow up on the apologetic ones, and know that the b!tchy ones are AW's.

Creepy? Creepy? Step back and reconsider online dating. The whole scenario is "creepy", if you want to use that term.

 

[Latinoman]

Act like u do alot of stuff, have alot of firends etc etc. Lie about ur income a lil if its low, they never have to know how much u make. But other than that the profile is not that important i think.

Now...wouldn't it be nice if you work toward

1- Doing a lot of stuff with your life?
2- Have lot of friends?
3- If your income was higher?
4- Etc.?

That's the biggest difference between being a DJ and being a PUA. That's what working toward a DJ lifestyle does. As a DJ...you don't have to lie. You don't care. You are already happy with yourself.

As a PUA...you MIGHT have to lie.

See why one can hold into LTR and the other can't? Because one is the real thing and the other is not.

Now, not critisizing the methods on how to get laid. Just illustrating the differences between DJ and PUA.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

White lies hurt no-one. Act like u do alot of stuff, have alot of firends etc etc. Lie about ur income a lil if its low, they never have to know how much u make. But other than that the profile is not that important i think. It's the picture and wat u say to them.

I don't get it. Guys complain about how often women lie but yet we are supposed to attract women by subterfuge. Sure, you can act like you are popular and active, you can act as if you have a ton of money and other material things, sure you'll attract women. But have you thought about what types of women you'll attract? Women who value a guy who's popular, active and wealthy; and what do you think she'll do when she finds out the truth? Do you think you'll be on a date with her or posting a question in the forum about how she won't return your calls or how she ended up dating someone else?

Why is it so difficult for guys to be the men that they know attracts women? Sure it's easier to lie about yourself but what is that going to get you after the immediate payoff? Will the lies work for you in the long run? If you want women to be interested in you, you need to be interesting and authentic. You can easily cut corners and impress women with what you have and what you do but there's the likelihood that they will just move on to some other guy who has or does even more. Consider sarging women who enjoy who you are as a person. You'll then have a chance of keeping her interested as opposed to just keeping her entertained.