Thanks for all your candor. And while not unappreciated and even profitable by, I wanted to know if anyone has ever done anything like this and if so, what is their take/opinion/advice on it.
You are all correct, of course, in advising to weigh the potential risk against the potential reward. I realize that any endeavor in this realm is harebrained at best, downright suicidal at worst. And I find myself telling myself that I gotta be nuts every time I even think about this.
The situation is that I've known this woman for three years, through work. Our relationship has always been friendly if not flirty. This past year she lost a ton of weight and her banter with me has upped a notch on the flirty scale. Mine has s well. However, I'd ask her about her weekend and she'd respond with something like, "I was all alone. My husband was away with his friends." She'd always make it a point of telling me whenever her husband was away, even if I didn't ask. (Even writing this I'm thinking that I'm a no good blackguard.) Then she shows me a picture of herself from a party for someone she used o work with. Totally sexy. Tight, black ****tail dress, etc. AND she made it a point to tell me that she went alone. she'd stand right next to me at my desk and show me stupid jokes on her phone. totally non sensical sh!t. Like I really care. I never pursued it fully while I worked with her (don't fool around t work) but now that I've left I figure it's time to move in. (Yeah. I know what you're thinking. Won't fool around at work but has no problem banging another guy's wife.) And she called me a few times without my asking for bullsh!t not related to work. We all have each other's cells in case of whatever. The point I'm getting at is that she's putting out signs that she's looking. If not me, it's going to be someone else, so why not take advantage?
Morally and ethically? I see it as she's the one being untrue to her vow, not me. Does that make it right? Perhaps not. And I've been cheated on more than a few times, once by a woman whom I thought I loved more than life itself. Took me a few years to rid myself of the hollow feeling in my gut that left me with. Since then, my whole value system of faithfulness, relationships, love, etc has been warped to where I believe it's every man for himself. Not the most noble outlook but there it is. Perhaps if I met the gentleman I'd feel differently. But as it stands now, he's just an idea. and they have no kids.
Does all of this make me n a$$hole loser? Perhaps. Is it worth it? Definitely not. Will I go through with it? Not sure.
And it's not as though I have no other options. I've been dating and pursuing other women. I'm totally attracted to this one.