lower your standards as you age?

[Heretolearn]

Having a discussion, and the guys (married) were saying lower my standards because I am 33 single.

I am doing well in many respects and don't see why I would compromise on what is important to me. I accept the risk that I may not meet 'the one'.

Thoughts?

 

[Who Dares Win]

Considering that if you live in the western world your standards are already lower than what they should be, I dont see a reason for that.

First of all you dont need a woman, you are not a guy who broke his car in a lost town with only a couple of motels to chose.

Second it depends what you put on the table, at your age usually women cant play the diva as much as when they were in their 20s, so it should be less of a hassle for you to pick some.

Most of all there are no such things as "the one", there are many girls which are good looking enough to turn you on and compatible enough for you to enjoy their company.

 

[The Duke]

I can't comment about your standards because I don't know what they are, however I will say give it a few more years and if you have your life together, are in good shape, decent looking, have some social skills, understand women, make decent money, etc.........once you reach this point in life, I would make sure my standards are high. Have all of those things I mentioned and you can pretty much set your price. You will have what all women want.

 

[PlayHer Man]

In general, a man is most attractive to women and has the most sexual options between ages 25-40. So this is when your standards should be highest.

What benefit does someone else have for telling you to lower your standards? If its a female telling you.. its clearly a power move. If its a male telling you, its clearly jealousy. Most men don't like seeing other men get attractive women.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

I've found that my standards are slowly getting higher as I get older and more experienced.

Your standards should be at the top of what you're capable of, not what other people say they should be.

Of course, for me at least, it's a lot easier to quickly "separate" girls into categories, like within a few seconds after talking.

 

[bluenorther]

Women's expectation rise as they get older, why shouldn't ours rise to meet theirs, along with what we expect from ourselves?
If someone says to lower your standards for what you expect in a woman, maybe it's time to RAISE your standards for what you expect from YOURSELF.
That means showing some ambition and getting that raise you were offered, for instance. Lose some weight, hit the gym, work on your self image. Buy some nice shoes.
It's a sad truth that women have some unrealistic expectations from us men, but have so little to offer in return. Offering us a "ready-made family" is no offer at all.
It shouldn't be too much to ask for a woman whose looks haven't crashed!
Women call their body types "Average", but the "average" American woman is forty pounds obese.
I live in a yuppie commuterville and it's filled with hot SAHMs. I'm sure a few of them are single.
What you have to watch out for is meeting women who seem to have it all, but then you discover they're a hot dripping mess behind the scenes: toxic never-ending divorces, toxic kids, careers down the toilet, upside down mortgages, and so on. I go for the yuppie trophy (ex)wives, and my last one was the sort that most men would crawl over broken glass to be with. She dumped me after four months of cosmic se* because she needed to deal with the chaos in her life, or so she said. That was over four years ago. Today she won't speak to me, or I'd ask her how that's coming along. When she sees me at work, she looks like she's in pain-- and it's all internal.
Today, with some help from health issues, my own career has tanked. Rather than lower my standards, and date my meth-head client, I'd rather mind my own business.

 

[hockster]

My expectations continue to rise, but mainly on other attributes aside from physical appearance. I prefer to date women around my age, perhaps a few years younger and I understand that even if they keep themselves in good shape such as I do, like me, they're getting older and things aren't going to be as tight and firm as they once were. They don't have to be beauty queens, but they can't be a cow with dragging udders.

What I expect now is that they have a decent job that they can support themselves, they're financially responsibile and not carrying a lot of debt outside a mortgage, they're independent, and they're kids are either out of the house or close to out of the house.

I find the kids part to be the most amusing aspect of the 40 something modern day woman. Especially the ones who put their career first, then squirted out a few kids in their late 30's in a very questionable relationship. They dumped their husband, took the house, the kids and half his paycheck. They're now 45 and have two kids under the age of 8. They think that they deserve Brad Pitt whose going to come in and conform his life entirely around her's and the kids. Lol. The ones that are the complete joke are chasing young guys 5+ years younger who actually believes these guys want to sign up for her long term bull****.

 

[orion]

You dont have to lower your standards.

As a man of your age you are just coming into your own.

It is time to raise your standards, for yourself and others.

I think they mistake you for a woman, in which case this would be very good, albeit unrealistic advice.

 

[Senzoi]

Eh... not so much!

You dont have to lower your standards.

As a man of your age you are just coming into your own.

It is time to raise your standards, for yourself and others.

I think they mistake you for a woman, in which case this would be very good, albeit unrealistic advice.

Listen to this guy.

And why would take advice from married men? Fuk that sh1t. My guess is you are the type of person that wants to get laid and/or settle down enough that those fools would suggest lowering your standards.

Keep your standards, and either do what it takes to land you a woman matching them, or voluntarily forgo being involved with women otherwise. As a single man in his prime (also best time period to start maximizing yourself financially), you are in the best position to shear the wool from the sheep.

You are essentially a wild wolf listening to some domesticated German Shepherds in the backyard of their owner's (waifu) house about how to live your life. Everything a man in that position says or does is, 99% of the time, dictated by a sense of 1. Wanting to bring you in to their level, and 2. Not wanting to displease waifu.

Keep your standards, stay single (if that is what is required), continue improving yourself for your own sake, and don't put out needless effort for the chance to plunge into a hole you might not even enjoy.

 

[Atom Smasher]

At 56, my standards have raised considerably, from physical to character. I no longer go for quantity but rather quality.

 

[tryst type]

As others have stated, my standards keep rising as I get older.

I remember in my teens thinking the opposite to be true. I thought as you get older you'd just take any woman since things like interest in music, movies, etc wouldn't be as important.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Play her Man,
"In general, a man is most attractive to women and has the most sexual options between ages 25-40.".....Evidence please,while I always try and keep an open mind,my experience is that it just gets easier and easier to find Women as you age...common sense really,the Demographic with Women living longer, Men burned out in the Workplace and the increasing number of Homo svexuals means you can really pick and chose!

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Hockster,
I totally agree with your take on this,particularly "I find the kids part to be the most amusing aspect of the 40 something modern day woman. Especially the ones who put their career first, then squirted out a few kids in their late 30's in a very questionable relationship. They dumped their husband, took the house, the kids and half his paycheck. They're now 45 and have two kids under the age of 8. They think that they deserve Brad Pitt whose going to come in and conform his life entirely around her's and the kids. Lol. The ones that are the complete joke are chasing young guys 5+ years younger who actually believes these guys want to sign up for her long term bull****." In an almost comical way you hit the nail right on the head!