Long Distance Relationships. Use them as Long Distance Plates instead

[JoeMarron]

Now if you were to say that it's probable based on numbers and therefore one should be aware of the possibility I would agree.

I'll go as far to say that it's unlikely that she'll cheat. Decent, quality women simply don't have the desire to cheat on a man she's interested in/in love with/satisfied with. It doesn't matter if he's 5 seconds away or an ocean away. If we're basing it on numbers, most LDRs fail the same reason most regular relationships fail; most men have no idea what they're doing and most men don't know how to choose the right woman for a relationship. Some men will even lose interest in the LDR and move on to someone else.

 

[Sofomore]

I'll go as far to say that it's unlikely that she'll cheat. Decent, quality women simply don't have the desire to cheat on a man she's interested in/in love with/satisfied with. It doesn't matter if he's 5 seconds away or an ocean away. If we're basing it on numbers, most LDRs fail the same reason most regular relationships fail; most men have no idea what they're doing and most men don't know how to choose the right woman for a relationship. Some men will even lose interest in the LDR and move on to someone else.

Joe I am assuming you are in a LDR? I was in one for a year and just got out of it. She was 1.5 hrs away so I would see her every weekend.

It wasn't until I was out of it until I could see the truth behind most LDRs. I agree 100% with what you are saying, but your view on them is skewed because you are comparing these statements to your own LDR.

As a whole, a LDR is a bad idea and it ends up being a waste of time.

To be honest, my brother is an example of it working out. He dated a girl for a year and then spent TWO years long term, Boston to Cali. She is a quality girl that (hopefully) wouldn't cheat on him and it worked out in the end. 5 years later and they are happily living in the same city. Their jobs have been secured, both doctors, and I guarantee they will get engaged in less than a year.

The simple fact is that something like this is RARE. Most people enter these relationships with an immature mindset. Thus, the OP's post applies to most situations, maybe not yours, but most.

I entered my LDR with an immature mindset. Had I kept my ex as a long distance plate, I would have avoided a big headache. There was no end in sight so I shouldn't have gotten myself involved. Now I have to chalk it up as an experience that I won't repeat.

 

[JoeMarron]

The simple fact is that something like this is RARE. Most people enter these relationships with an immature mindset. Thus, the OP's post applies to most situations, maybe not yours, but most.

I have seen it happen many times with not just regular women, but quality ones too. There are of course outliers, but like any outlier they are simply an anomaly.

This was the point of my last post and pretty much the whole reason I was debating with PairPlusRoyalFlush. We are the exception, the anomaly, the outlier. If we're doing what we need to be doing as men and we choose the right woman for a relationship, we don't need to be worried about fidelity, LDR or not.

Once again I must emphasize that I'm completely against LDRs. Yes I'm in one now but I for damn sure won't do it again. Every man would be better off gaming local chicks. If a man does find himself in an LDR however, I see no problem with telling him, "Hey man you're in a fvcked up situation but since you're hardheaded, here's how you can make it work."

 

[Sofomore]

Great post Sosuave666. I agree with everything you have said. Sometimes it takes experiencing a LDR to realize why you would never do it again. I stayed with mine because 1.5 hours was manageable, but not ideal. When I am with a girl I usually have secks every day and having it only on the weekend started to eat me from the inside.

For your second example, I could have been you in that situation in college. This girl had a bf in the Air Force and we would hang out all the time. She NEVER brought him up, so I escalated. Once my roommate told me about the bf, I felt guilty that she would cheat on a 4 year LTR/1 year long distance. I backed off and now they are getting married. Poor guy has no idea that his girl was on the verge of cheating. Man I should have fvcked her brains out.

 

[TheGambino]

Question:

Im in a LD'situation' right know, shes affected, had fun everything (last thread if your interested). I left, back to Holland shes 2500 miles away, she begged me not to f8ck other girls and made me promise to be loyal. She also posts on my facebook pics I love you etc.

Anyway in these situations how do you keep this long distance plates want you, so I can keep her as a plate I can f8ck everytime I visit Morocco.

You call her once a time? Text her or skype? or NC until I go back? any thoughts players share

 

[Sofomore]

Question:

Im in a LD'situation' right know, shes affected, had fun everything (last thread if your interested). I left, back to Holland shes 2500 miles away, she begged me not to f8ck other girls and made me promise to be loyal. She also posts on my facebook pics I love you etc.

Anyway in these situations how do you keep this long distance plates want you, so I can keep her as a plate I can f8ck everytime I visit Morocco.

You call her once a time? Text her or skype? or NC until I go back? any thoughts players share

Is the end in sight? Will she be moving back to where you live?

If not, you should probably keep occasional contact and hit her up when you will be in the area.

 

[TheGambino]

Is the end in sight? Will she be moving back to where you live?

If not, you should probably keep occasional contact and hit her up when you will be in the area.

I met her at vacation in Morocco, I was there. Cold approached when I saw her, dated, f8cked her 2 days later, she was with me almost all days. We hooked up, had fun, went clubbing, ate together all that. Last day her mom saw us at a cafe and I had to leave coz she was mad at us. Her daughter didnt came home for 2 days coz she spent 'em with me.

Anyway didnt see her after that and went back to Holland the next day. That's the situation. Im going back in like 3-4months, then I will most likeley see her.

Im asking whats the best game in this situation? Hit her up a few times to ask how shes doing or go completley ghost? I called her once and thats it. Shes already playing games by changing her facebook cover in 1 with another dude and stuff (old picture but ye she did it) also posting piccs of a crying girl with the text 'he left me hurt, would he really care if he did that' and go on...

 

[ELMER_GANTRY]

+1 Brilliant thread

 

[Valentino14]

Damn, I forgot all about this thread. Anyways I should clarify. I'm against dudes jumping right into an LDR which it seems like most men who mention it here are trying to do. Clearly a man would always be better off gaming chicks in his area.

As far as a relationship turning into an LDR, if there's a set end to it and it's not for too long then I don't see a problem. Hell yes I feel entitled to a women's fidelity for 6 months plus. Why the hell wouldn't a quality woman be able to stay faithful for that long in an LDR? Military families do that sh!t all the time. Of course it's more likely that she'll cheat but you're taking it to the extreme that it's certain that'll she'll cheat so you should end the relationship. You even went as far as to say that the dude shouldn't have married his chick because she probably cheated during the LDR. You feel it's not worth it and that's fine, whatever works for you but it seems like an unnecessarily paranoid and wasteful mindset to me.

I don't want to have to leave a relationship and start over with a new chick, throwing away months/years of progress, months/years of screening and getting to know one another, over something as trivial as distance in the year 2014. Perhaps I'm biased because I happen to be living but it is what it is, you see it as a waste of time and I don't, to each his own.

If your relationship started out strong then becomes an LDR. it should work a lot better than just starting a LDR from the start.

 

[JoeMarron]

If your relationship started out strong then becomes an LDR. it should work a lot better than just starting a LDR from the start.

Right. I didn't do that though. I did the long distant plate thing for awhile but then sh!t escalated, we caught feelings and that was the end of not being exclusive.