So here's the deal, for the last month I've slowly started caring less and less. Didn't notice it at first but today realized I don't give a **** anymore and it's a weird feeling. What happened was I found out that a girl I went out with not to long ago is in a relationship. I really liked this girl and should have been a bit upset about it but I felt nothing. Combined that with the fact that I've been cancelled on 4 times in the last 2 weeks by various girls and my response has always been "ok, whatever". I don't know what's causing this but at the same time I'm not very motivated lately either (maybe related, maybe not). Also noticed my sex drive has gone down too (don't even feel the need to jerk off anymore, it's been like 2 weeks). Anyway, I'm not sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing.
I've heard unreactiveness was good, but recently haven't cared and it feels strange
- Thread starter Kal0051
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I've had that happen before. If you aren't having fun then you're doing something wrong. FORGET all the don juan advice and just do whatever you feel like doing, period. If you want to hang out platonically with a girl, do so. Feel free to break EVERY rule in the pickup book. Actually, that would be a great thing to try to do. Buy a girl flowers, tell her you love her and she looks amazing, etc. Do whatever. Just make sure you do whatever you directly feel like doing, instead of doing what you think will get you what you think you want.
corrector
Master Don Juan
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I don't think you are being unreactive in terms of pick-up strategy, but in terms of getting cynical and just giving up on the whole thing. I think unreactive is part of that 'push and pull' thing, or 'teasing' a girl, or brushing off a girl who is already interested in you to make her more interested, etc....
But in this case, you don't have anything to work with by being unreactive since there really isn't anyone interested.
In the past I've heard that when you stopped caring, then you started seeing success with women. But, I think whether you care or don't care the result is still the same. You either have it or you don't.
But in this case, you don't have anything to work with by being unreactive since there really isn't anyone interested.
In the past I've heard that when you stopped caring, then you started seeing success with women. But, I think whether you care or don't care the result is still the same. You either have it or you don't.
I don't think I've given up yet, although definitely cynical. Your not quite right that I don't have any girl interested, there's one that is interested but I'm not interested in her. And there's another that wants to chill with me, don't know if she's really interested but definitely curious.corrector said:
DMSR76
Senior Don Juan
It may simply mean that you're having a growth spurt. I can tell you from experience that my sporadic 'don't care' moods have usually been the times when I've grown the most as a man. I become very introspective during these times and have used these times to cultivate my personal philosophies.Kal0051 said:
It's a good thing. Soon this feeling of 'I don't care' becomes habit. You slowly reach a point where you stop pedestalizing p**** and give credence to ideas that are a lot more worthy. Your value rises because the value you genuinely place on yourself rises. Suddenly you find yourself (often unconsciously) diverging from certain types of people because your consciousness has shifted away from theirs.
Ummm.... No. Being unreactive means being unaffected by rejection, shyttests, bytchyness, flaking, amogging, or anything else negative. Basically, keeping your cool when people fvck with you, and not letting people bother you.
There is a fine line between unreactive, and apathetic, though, and I think Kal is apathetic right now, which may stem from lack of success. Its okay though, cuz either way, you're not letting it get to you, but its better to be unreactive from a place of confidence; like "Im the coolest fvcker ever, and what you think matters NOTHING to me." than apathetic coming from a place like "Im so sick of everything and everyone, I dont care what you think, and I dont care about anything anymore. Fvck it all." In other words, I think you are using it as a defense mechanism, rather than as your responsibility as a man, to be hard as a rock in the face of adversity.
Take that as you will.
Don't try and justify your AFC mindset. You're spewing negative bvll**** that won't help anyone.Isko said:
I have had this uncaring attitude before aka Acedia which is also linked with depression.
You need to take the uncaring attitude and couple it with a fun positive determined attitude.