is it worth or should i stay away?

[oneboy21]

I used to talk to this girl at work, she is cute.
she works in another department than mine, so we used to ran into each other at the coffee place at work. For some reason(i don't know) she quit the job.
I know her name(she told me her first name and i found her last name in my work directory) and found her on facebook. will it be a good idea to send her a message or just ignore her.
If you guys think i should send her a message, what would be a good line to use.

 

[Iceberg]

MESSAGE: Hey (Name), I heard you quit. Congrats on the new gig. Where'd you end up going?

She'll reply with the usual blah blah blah. And then you'll say something about "How do you like it so far...yada yada yada...I could use a break from these work people. Let's go to happy hour this week."

 

[Aaron B]

Do you have other women in your life?

 

[oneboy21]

Yes there are!
To make sure whether to try or not, i asked for suggestion from our fellow donjuan's

 

[Aaron B]

I'm curious as to why you didn't seize the opportunity in the past when you had better access to her

It seems strange that you've waited until the only way you can contact her is via Facebook

 

[oneboy21]

She quit too soon.
I suggested that we have lunch at this chinese place and she said she loves those restaurants. i said ok, but didn't pick a day or time, so thought of reminding her in few days.
from the next day on wards i didn't see her, it happened last week.

 

[Aaron B]

She quit too soon.
I suggested that we have lunch at this chinese place and she said she loves those restaurants. i said ok, but didn't pick a day or time, so thought of reminding her in few days.
from the next day on wards i didn't see her, it happened last week.

here's a couple of things you can do in the future that will help you:

1. always have a firm place and time when you extend a date invitation. she should know what she's agreeing to. you are the man and you are expected to have the plan

2. there is no advantage in waiting (in most cases). always get her phone number right away.

You are now operating from a weaker position than you were before. In general, you only want to operate from a position of strength.

To contrast what happened here to an example from my real life: Within 3 minutes of being introduced to the woman I'm now married to, I requested her phone number. Within a week we went on our first date, and it would have been sooner if not for extenuating circumstances beyond my control.

When she's interested is the time to get her phone number, plan a date, and invite her on the date. Because if you don't, she might quit her job or you may otherwise find your access to her blocked. Don't take anything for granted. We aren't promised tomorrow. You must act in the moment and not allow your fears to cause you to hesitate or procrastinate. Rarely is there anything to be gained by waiting. Frequently is there something to be gained from acting now!

In conclusion, it is not going to benefit you to make excuses or blame outside factors. None of that matters. All that matters is that at one time you had access to a girl that you were interested in and she seemed at least somewhat interested in you and you failed to act. The only thing that's important now is to correct this behavior so you don't repeat it in the future.