In a long-term relationship, how much should the man pay?

[The_Reaper]

I am unsure about this one.

What should the ratio of payment be? Maybe the man should pay 60% of the time?

I recently went to Paris for a week with my girlfriend and I paid for 90% of everything, including tickets for various things, and food. I felt like it was too much. I'm a student, and not a rich one at that.

What do you think?

My girlfriend and I are planning to go to London. She is probably expecting me to pay the full price of the hotel/hostel we will stay in. She's not wealthy, and I do have more money than she has.

What are your thoughts?

 

[Obsidian]

My girlfriend and I are planning to go to London. She is probably expecting me to pay the full price of the hotel/hostel we will stay in. She's not wealthy, and I do have more money than she has.

well that's the reason why she lets you pay for so much (and possibly the reason why she's going out with you to begin with). If I were you, tho, I'd definitely cut down on this. She'll view you as a chump if you pay for everything. And you will be a chump.

 

[The_Reaper]

well that's the reason why she lets you pay for so much (and possibly the reason why she's going out with you to begin with). If I were you, tho, I'd definitely cut down on this. She'll view you as a chump if you pay for everything. And you will be a chump.

Thanks Obsidian. We went out for 4 months without me paying a single thing for her.

Then, we went to Paris and I paid, and now she probably expects it for London. I simply can't afford it, but I don't know if I should admit this.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Suggestion; find a woman who is willing to pay at least the portion that you believe is fair. Who's to say that she will pay the balance of what you don't pay? These things should be determined and negotiated ahead of time.

 

[Plain & Simple]

let me tell you this, how long have you been going out with you?
Did you do pay everything for her since the begining?

Yet most important did you attract her to like you and go out with u cause u was buying things for her everytime u was with her?

If thats the case then u are being used for your money, she might not neccesarly be a golddigger but she simply takes advantage of you since she can and wants to without looking like a GD by you being her bf.

If thats not the case then you should have no problem at all in communicating her that you want to split both your expenses in whatever way you or both of u think its adequate.

 

[mexican_player2]

50-50

 

[Raikojo17]

50-50

yep.

 

[Obsidian]

well, due to some minor factors, I think the guy is expected to pay for a little more than half. For example, it's supposedly a gentlemanly act for the man to grab the check at a restaurant. Overall, though, you should aim to keep things fairly balanced.

You definitely shouldn't be paying for expensive vacations for other people when you're a student. (For that matter, you shouldn't really be blowing money on expensive vacations for yourself when you're a student either.)

 

[IKO69]

Agreed. You should get the check to be a gentleman, but it should be fairly balanced. If there is any hesitation on the woman to not pay either because it's her "turn" or you are in a tight spot at the moment, best to ditch her as any girl that really likes you should cover you and not make an issue in those positions.

 

[vorbis]

imo it depends on earning power (might just be saying that as an excuse for my situation )

My gf earns about a quarter what I earn. I do tend to pay for most stuff. As in, I usually pay for eating out (bill tends to come to 20 to 25 dollars for the 2 of us) She will pay for small things like ice cream or coffee. She also cooks food for us as well. I could be viewed as a chump but I'm happyish with this arrangement. If she earned near what I do, I obviously wouldn't be happy with paying for most stuff.

As Francisco d'Anconia, its ultimately what you are happy with.

 

[typical]

imo it depends on earning power (might just be saying that as an excuse for my situation )

My gf earns about a quarter what I earn. I do tend to pay for most stuff. As in, I usually pay for eating out (bill tends to come to 20 to 25 dollars for the 2 of us) She will pay for small things like ice cream or coffee. She also cooks food for us as well. I could be viewed as a chump but I'm happyish with this arrangement. If she earned near what I do, I obviously wouldn't be happy with paying for most stuff.

As Francisco d'Anconia, its ultimately what you are happy with.

I agree, if you earn enough it shouldn't matter but if you not earning enough then make sure both of you guys are happy with the paying arrangements.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

50-50

Oh, so you're too good to let a woman pay your way all of the time?

 

[DJDamage]

In an LTR it shouldn't be such a big deal. One night you might end up paying $60 for the both of you and another time she pays $70 for the both of you, there is some sort of a balance without taking out the calculator and figuring things out.

But when we are talking about going on a trip, it doesn't have to be 50-50 but close to it and the expenses should be shared.

A good girl in LTR will want to offer to pay her share WITHOUT you asking her. The mere fact that you are paying for everything and she doesn't even raise an eyebrow suggests that you have spoiled her from the begining and she doesn't think there is anything wrong with you paying for almost everything.

Ask her to call you "Sugar Daddy" from now on because that is what you are.

 

[Mindtrust]

Anything that may cost alot of money, has always been planned in my case and has been 50-50.
I think that is fair enough.

But I do like to treat a women now and again..

I dont mind that.

Mindtrust.

 

[SharinganUser]

If a 75% of your height and 33% of your weight and has a waist to hip ratio of .8 and (for example) you are 185cm tall, 200lbs and the bill is $2000$, then she will have to pay

(.75*185/.8/2000)+(.33*200/.8/2000)=0.12796875=12.796875% of the bill.

=$255.93

If she has an ugly face than it's (.75*185/.8)+(.33*200/.8) +1/3 of 2000 = $922.60

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

The real question is, why are you in an LTR at age 20 to begin with? Want to go to Europe and save money? DTB (dump that b!tch) and sarge in jolly ole England. You be glad you did.

 

[Remulak]

They want equal everything except the shytty things like paying half

 

[mexican_player2]

Oh, so you're too good to let a woman pay your way all of the time?

yeah man, whats wrong with that??

and check this out, in the US doesnt matter if you pay for her but in mexico thats a very strong tradition and i was able to break it on her.

The thing is, i love more my money than anything else.

also im a cheap bastard lol

but this is good, when we break up i wont have any regrets about spending too much on her.

Money First!!!

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

yeah man, whats wrong with that??

and check this out, in the US doesnt matter if you pay for her but in mexico thats a very strong tradition and i was able to break it on her.

The thing is, i love more my money than anything else.

also im a cheap bastard lol

but this is good, when we break up i wont have any regrets about spending too much on her.

Money First!!!

Tradition doesn't pay the rent so I say if a woman willingly pays your way, why not ride her for all she's worth?