TheCWord said:
People on here keep giving you advice and you keep replying with very negative, self-defeating comments. Nobody can help you until you're ready to help yourself, my man.
This.
You're actually reminding me of Phillip S., OP. Maybe deep down you want to fail, be miserable, and play the "woe is me" victim. Seriously think about that, and take a good look at your self esteem, worth, and respect.
As I always say, predators hone in on lonely, desperate, weak, submissive, "lost" folk with low self-esteem. They make easy prey for them to use, manipulate, control, toy with, and abuse. Stop allowing it, and putting yourself in these positions - thinking it's all your worth. Your thoughts make up your reality, so stop being the victim, chasing after sluts and crazies, and women who DON'T want you, and DO treat you like **** and tease you, and being so over-eager for anything - that you end up settling for ****, being teased, strung along, etc.
This is probably what's turning off women. Are you trying too hard, acting over-eager and desperate, thinking you HAVE to make it work, or that you NEED women (only to feel like **** when it doesn't happen), coming on too strong, settling for anything, tolerating all sorts of BS, getting too butthurt over rejection and failure, etc? Or maybe you feel like you don't DESERVE a woman?
Don't get caught up in the vicious cycle of low self-esteem -- loneliness -- desperation -- rejection -- insecurity --... it's just gonna keep mounding up, and making things worse and worse.
As well, people treat you as they view you - which is a reflection of how you view and treat yourself. If you view yourself as a nobody - people are going to treat you like a nobody. If you think you deserve **** - people are going to treat you like ****. And so on. You MUST value and respect yourself before others do.
One thing about failure, rejection, disappointment, etc... people don't really care (much less know) what you're going through. You gotta just deal with it, and keep pushing forward. Don't dwell on negativity or failure, or people will just view you as negative, weak, bitter, a whiney loser, etc, and treat you accordingly. You must be confident, social, assertive, etc to attract and gain respect from people. Most people like winners - not whiners. And this **** shows - in your facial expression, attitude, behavior, etc.. It's clear as day. Not many people are going to feel sorry for you, and you shouldn't depend on them to.
If you need time off to readjust and heal, maybe clear your mind, before you get back out there and feel confident again - then do that. Failure and rejection hurts, and can build up. Don't keep fighting against fire if you're not up to par, feel like ****, have no emotional energy, etc - only to put in a half-assed effort and fail again... not to mention, EXPECTING to fail again.
Also, stop worrying about what everyone else is doing, comparing and competing, and trying to fit in. Just focus on you. Don't try vigorously, or feel entitled to land a hottie because other people are - then ending up disappointed when it doesn't happen. Don't make attaining women a goal or prize, because everyone else has them. This also causes a lot of insecurity, co-dependancy, desperation, etc.
Maybe being in a fraternity isn't the best idea if everyone around you is getting laid, and you aren't. It's hard to not compare and want to fit into what everyone else is doing - then feeling like **** when it doesn't happen. Maybe go solo, and get your own women outside of parties. Make sure you're actually approaching, socializing, and flirting with women, as well. You have to put yourself out there, get noticed, and make things happen.
Chin the **** up.
(Just my thoughts and opinions, assumptions; may not be accurate.)