I'm confused. facebook chat

[asianbboy]

Ok. So this girl does little things that makes me think she's interested. I talk to her sometimes after class. but twice now, i've texted her, and she doesn't respond after a few texts. idk how to interpret this.
Me: [name] i feel like you'd like this website http://www.reddit.com/r/aww
hb: Awwwww<3 so cute
me: I know right!
me: whatt you actually work here [job site]
hb: Hahaha yeahhh I do
me: haha is that a penguin in the photos?
me: oh its a rabbit wow
hb: Yeah things get a little weird...
me: wanna see something funny? [later]
hb: of course
me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FieuqTlpv9w
me: wow no good? this my fav sketch ever

no response.. and yes shes pretty so probably theres other guys in the equation

 

[Eph]

My guess is as good as anyone's but I'd say you're coming off as desperate/outcome-dependent. Each time you messaged her twice (in a row) while she only messaged you back once.

Go 1:1 or try and get 2:1. Also you didn't provide times so, I'll assume you're messaging her back instantly. Space out your responses.

 

[AlexLefty]

My guess is as good as anyone's but I'd say you're coming off as desperate/outcome-dependent. Each time you messaged her twice (in a row) while she only messaged you back once.
^This

Go 1:1 or try and get 2:1. Also you didn't provide times so, I'll assume you're messaging her back instantly. Space out your responses.
Or, don't text her at all. That's really your only option. Stop all texting 'cause no matter what you say it will come off as needy. You need to win her over with your REAL charm in person now. This will also take time. You've already ****ed up by being needy over text, so you'll have to take your time by winning her over irl. The best way, obviously, is to get other girls..

^^^

 

[asianbboy]

it seems like girls are only attracted to guys who are social with other girls already. I found out this girl wasn't showing me any love cause apparently one of her friends already asked her to prom.
I feel like the only way to salvage my lack of a social reputation is to game on average looking chicks i don't like to build up my rep. Right now the hot ones don't pay me any mind. also i haven't really developed a fun personality, i'm still too serious.. ugh

 

[Eph]

That's called "social proof". You don't need it from girls, you can get it from guys too. Really you don't need it at all but it helps. You can also fake it. Just go around talking to people, and when someone else walks in everyone else will be talking about you or to you. Boom, instant social proof.

And let's get one thing straight: "this girl" wasn't showing you any love because she doesn't feel it for you. Women mess with and show a lot of different guys love for a lot of different reasons. It has nothing to do with "one of her friends already" asking her to prom.

Next just have fun. Everything is a lot easier when you are. If you feel you are just a more serious person in general, don't change for their benefit, change because you want to. Being the "no bull$#!t" guy can have its advantages. For one, people take you more serious. They don't look at you as the clown, they look at you as a leader.

Just go up to girls and talk to them. That's how you get better. And don't be outcome-dependent. Pray for the best, prepare for the worst. Don't care one way or the other. Don't take life so serious is my advice. There's a reason it's called "game".

 

[AH909]

Really disagree with the person above me saying social proof doesn't matter. It's part of your value which is extremely important when girls are screening you. Girls judge you not by you but also you friends, you could be a cool, decent looking guy but if you hang out with a bunch of computer nerds who jerk off every day that will instantly eliminate you from some girls. That's why it's important to become cool with a high up social circle cause then you can attract girls from the social level that's equal to yours and below, while if your in a lower social circle it's nearly impossible to get girls from circles higher than yours which will lower your options and hurt your chances just due to numbers. It's also important to portray that you actaully talk to girls. Do this by making sure your facebook pics arent douchey mirror pics and that your pics have you with hot chicks, even if it is your hot cousin (gotta fake it till you make it.) IMHO facebook is only good for displaying social proof and NOT interacting. That should be done over text and sparringly. Don't be one of those guys that girls make fun of cause you constantly badger them on facebook.

 

[AlexLefty]

Zooming out, it all boils down to status. status is everything

 

[Eph]

Really disagree with the person above me saying social proof doesn't matter. It's part of your value which is extremely important when girls are screening you. Girls judge you not by you but also you friends, you could be a cool, decent looking guy but if you hang out with a bunch of computer nerds who jerk off every day that will instantly eliminate you from some girls. That's why it's important to become cool with a high up social circle cause then you can attract girls from the social level that's equal to yours and below, while if your in a lower social circle it's nearly impossible to get girls from circles higher than yours which will lower your options and hurt your chances just due to numbers. It's also important to portray that you actaully talk to girls. Do this by making sure your facebook pics arent douchey mirror pics and that your pics have you with hot chicks, even if it is your hot cousin (gotta fake it till you make it.) IMHO facebook is only good for displaying social proof and NOT interacting. That should be done over text and sparringly. Don't be one of those guys that girls make fun of cause you constantly badger them on facebook.

All very good points, except for the fact you can still get girls without social proof. Look at the bar scene, you may know the bartender, you may know a few people here and there but its usually going to be different people every week(end). What happens if you go to another state/country? You know no one, but it is STILL very possible to get girls. You can have the most social proof in the world, but the guy with better game will almost always outdo you.

My point was social proof isn't everything. Social proof does play a part in your value (both perceived and actual), but it doesn't determine your value. Like I said, its very easy to fake social proof. It's not as easy to fake good game. If a girl doesn't "know" if you have social proof or not, it can actually work in your favor if you play your cards right. She'll be curious and try anything to find out, which usually involves hanging out/around you more. Curiosity killed the cat.

 

[AH909]

You have to remember that high school is not like a bar there's not going to be new people coming in everyday so status elevates in importance. But you are right about game being more important it's just that in high school game and social proof are almost on the same level.