I told my GF I love her...

TomN

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 1, 2003
Messages
78
Reaction score
1
Age
38
Location
Washington
...and not only did she say it back, she has said it to me since then. If you are ready to say it, then say it. There are no "rules" as to who should say it first.
 

Tomatoes

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 3, 2006
Messages
1,103
Reaction score
7
Age
39
Location
Nottingham
Sorry i was expecting another...."I told her and she ripped out my heart and ate it" kinda responses........

Thats why the rule is their....law of averages says that if you say it to her. Your taking an uneccessary risk

Just wait till she says it. Normally for the best.
 

Knockout King

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 18, 2002
Messages
98
Reaction score
4
Location
The Altered State of Drugachussetes
godsgifttowomen said:
No.

Any AFC can be "ready" to tell his girl he loves her. That's why this is bad advice. AFC's haven't learned yet how to protect their hearts. He will get into a relationship and tell her he loves her after a month. I guess this is OK to you? It's wrong. She will freak out and leave.


007
That's just a general rule for the hardcore AFC's who are in their first months of DJing. A credible DJ knows when the time is right, since women frequently make it quite obvious that they want to say "I love you", but are afraid to do so.

And the AFC that you described above isn't "ready" to proclaim his love by any means because it's not love at all, it's blind infatuation. It's different if you feel an honest love for the person and you receive the same vibe from her.
 

Fash

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 16, 2005
Messages
445
Reaction score
9
Age
42
Location
UK
Tomatoes said:
Just wait till she says it. Normally for the best.
Yeh, wait for her to say it first, then say:

"Awwweeee thanks!" :rolleyes:
 

Docs

Banned
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
3,582
Reaction score
56
Location
Kingston, Can-a-duh
godsgifttowomen said:
No.

Any AFC can be "ready" to tell his girl he loves her. That's why this is bad advice. AFC's haven't learned yet how to protect their hearts. He will get into a relationship and tell her he loves her after a month. I guess this is OK to you? It's wrong. She will freak out and leave.


007
Who said he was AFC? Maybe he is ready, and he said it because he wanted to, not because he had to adhere to some unwritten rule. In your eyes, he may be AFC, and if not, saying the 'l' word was. That's disappointing, open yourself up to new ideas, even old ideas while you're at it.

You can't follow the beaten path forever, he wanted to step into the unknown, and damn good for him.

Good job, I hope you wil be happy TomN!:D
 

Climax

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 2, 2004
Messages
2,330
Reaction score
5
My 2c...

TomN: You have nothing to worry about.... And you are right; there are NO set rules.... Everyone is different, and everyone will be ready at different times.... With some people they will be ready to say it after one month, and with others it might take a year or 2.

If I feel that I love a girl that I am going out with after 2 weeks, then so be it.. Not to scare her off I wont make it so blunt though, I would say something like "Baby... you know... I think I’m falling for you" and then just smile at her and kiss her... 99.9% of the time she will be flattered and probably say that she thinks she is falling for you too.

What I would personally recommend though, is to look for signs that she wants you to say it before you say "I love you" on a regular basis to her. Trust me, if they WANT you to say it to them, they WILL drop hints to you along the way, all you need to do is keep a lookout for those hints.

Overall, normally people DONT fall in love with each other as soon as a few weeks etc, so in 99% of the cases, people wont have to worry about it being "too soon" etc, but in the rare cases that it IS true, there is always a less "frightening" way to convey the message to your partner, as I stated above with the "I’m falling for you" line as appose to "I love you" line.

And really guys, who gives a f*ck who says it 1st? That’s just immature. If you feel it before her, then express yourself, without frightening her away. And visa versa... If she tells u that she loves u and YOU don’t love HER yet, then don’t say "I love you", just say that u are falling for her and you can feel that what you feel for her grows and strengthens every day, etc... All you have to do is choose your wording correctly, and you should never have a problem with this "issue".


Laterz...
 

frivolousz21

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 11, 2004
Messages
3,154
Reaction score
16
Age
41
Location
belleville, il
Yea, I get everyones view on this.

saying i love you is subjective.

Ive always said it first to the women who were in love with me.

most women wont say it first.

unless she is young or inmature.

its the mans job to take charge, hence lead! he is leading the relationship.

women want a man
 

Damian

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Nov 13, 2005
Messages
443
Reaction score
3
Location
San Diego, CA
Haha. Personally, I don't like the concept of "I love you". Though I think Mystery Method's "You've hijacked my brain" routine is a bit more acceptable for me. Along the same lines, it may even work better to explain how you feel. Instead of a cliche three wordes, you actually have to express yourself. Creates a stronger mutual attraction and fosters a good emotional connection.

-Damian
 

Climax

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 2, 2004
Messages
2,330
Reaction score
5
just to add...

Just another thing for ya`all to think about....

Actions speak louder than words

If you SHOW her that you love her, you wont NEED to say it, you will both know it, and it will come out of your mouths naturaly.;)


Laterz...
 
Joined
Mar 18, 2006
Messages
3,960
Reaction score
36
frivolousz21 said:
Ive always said it first to the women who were in love with me.
How did you know that they loved you if they never expressed it? You are assuming!! Women are the more emotional and nurturing creatures thus they always think it if not say it first. You are obviously the exception and not the rule.


frivolousz21 said:
Most women wont say it first.unless she is young or immature.
You must be young and inexperienced...you stated the complete opposite of the reality!!! Most (99.9999999) of women say it first!! So what is "young"?? What is the age limit when it is ok to to say those 3 words? 23? 27? 34? Are you saying that when YOU say "I love you" that YOU are young and immature?? "No" you say? Then why does it make someone else immature when they say it?


frivolousz21 said:
its the mans job to take charge, hence lead! he is leading the relationship.
Saying words and expressing sentiments has nothing to do with leading or taking charge - this is a matter of the heart and not of the brain or muscles. Expressing sentiment is the domain of females and not of the male!!


frivolousz21 said:
women want a man
This is the only sensible statement that you have made in this post!!!!!
 

Life-Trainee

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 29, 2004
Messages
795
Reaction score
0
Location
Boston, MA
With my ex-GF I dropped hints by using word "love" indirectly. I'd refer to sex as "making love". I would say things like "i love that about you" or "i love it when you do that" as a reward.

Ironically I didn't tell her explicitly that I love her until after the breakup lol.
 

frivolousz21

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 11, 2004
Messages
3,154
Reaction score
16
Age
41
Location
belleville, il
Its sad so many guys have to hide behind rules and regualations with dating..to hide there lack of Inner game.

all of my strong male friends..do exactly wat I do..and we have never had any issues with women of the bad regard.


I think the platform for this place is built wrong..its built on prevention of hurt, failure, and fear.

instead of assertiveness, positivity, and reality.


everything here is always lumped into large categories.

Ive never met one my my male friends who have had a women say I love you first.

Ive also never seen one of them get dumped.well I take that back one is a afc and gets ****ed over.
but the rest just do what they want....hence what they want.


let me say that again..waht they want.


and it works.

dont live in fear.
 

Lifeforce

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 8, 2003
Messages
2,094
Reaction score
17
Location
SWEDEN
My first girl I got after joining this site I never showed any appreciation, I didn't tell her I loved her or hardly say any compliments. She felt I didn't care about her. Saying I love you is not wrong at all, just because some guys here don't have the balls to take an opportunity doesn't mean what they say is correct. There are no time limit on when to say it, you know when the time is correct, at least you will when you love yourself and is confident in who you are and what you want.
 
Joined
Mar 18, 2006
Messages
3,960
Reaction score
36
Frivlolous,

I was not stating a "rule" I was stating reality based on a man's and woman's genetic natures. This is how it is!

You and your buddies are obviously the young and misguided ones who bought into this new corrupt false feminist role reversal of man and woman.

It is ok to love but generally speaking men do not verbally express this as women do -- every women has complained for milleniums that men do not express their sentiments as often as they (the female) would like. It is not in our nature.

The new generation is is going outside of their natures as men and have taken on contemporary artificial values as outlined by mass media. So in reality you and your buddies are actually the ones following the rules of the modern age and these corrupt rules as handed to us by the feminists via mass media are outside of our masculine natures.

I guess it's ok for men to cry too?

I don't need women to set rules for my nature as a man!!

Sign of the times...women have become masculine and men have become feminine in their thinking!
 

frivolousz21

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 11, 2004
Messages
3,154
Reaction score
16
Age
41
Location
belleville, il
ur putting words in my mouth

I just stated that we have all said it first.
my fiance is more affectionate then me..but I am affectionate to her.


also...I do cry sometimes..ive cried at a movie...ive cried giving a speech, i croed when my gramdpa died.

ive cried in front of my fiance.

listen...you can tell me im wrong all you want...but the fact is..ive had 1 female ive ****ed up with.


1 out of 100 ive dated..and only 1..didnt want me that I wanted.

not saying that others didnt want me..im sure it was mutual.

my method is simple.

everyone here know what that is...and the guys who do it....greatly agree with it.

by the way..we dont live in caves, I dont use a gun to killy my food, nor do I only work to support us.

things change....roles change....but I still lead my woman
 

Juan_Man

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 3, 2001
Messages
1,102
Reaction score
28
The guy's interest level should always appear lower than the girl's. Protect the heart at all costs!
 
Joined
Mar 18, 2006
Messages
3,960
Reaction score
36
frivolousz21 said:
Ialso...I do cry sometimes..ive cried at a movie...ive cried giving a speech, i croed when my gramdpa died. I've cried in front of my fiance.
The question is why do you cry and where -- over the death of a loved one is normal - people cry at funerals BUT you cried at a movie?? Hmmm, I don't know about that one - which movie - was it when King Kong fell from the skyscraper??:Or was it when Thelma and Louise drove off of the cliff?? :rolleyes:

I choked up a few times and even felt a lump in my throat once but outright cried -- ummm, wait, I did cry..when my computer's hard drive crashed, I wept like a like a 6 month old baby with a severe bout of diaper rash. I guess it is ok to cry sometimes - but I wouldnt have cried in public!!

I didn't say "Men do not cry" - of course we are human - I don't think Jason from the movie "Friday the 13th" ever cried, but he is a crazy bastard!!

When I made that statement I meant it in the regard of crying in front of women - the feminists said "it was ok to cry in front of a woman" -- if it is a downright devestating happening then I understand but to cry in front of a woman is not done unless you want her to lose respect for you as a man.

A woman crying is normal based on her nature so no points are taken off when she cries but points are taken off if we cry for things that are not devestating to our psyche.

frivolousz21 said:
...by the way..we dont live in caves, I dont use a gun to killy my food, nor do I only work to support us.

things change....roles change....but I still lead my woman
Hahaha, oh no - not the cave anology -- feminists use that line!!!

Things change BUT our NATURES as men and women never change!!!!!! Women should say "I love you" first because they are designed for the emotional state in their thinking - for a man to say it first is not recommended no matter how sensitive of a aheart you have - it just shouldn't be done unless you want to come off as the "sensitive type" - mose submissive women don't like the nice sensitive type!!
 
Top