this has been the strangest 6 months of my life. i have met some really decent women, but it seems like every one ultimately falls apart the same way. Meet girl, things go great, she shows interest, talk a few times, convo goes great, set up date, get call 1 hour before date "sorry something came up", never hear from her again. Ive also been getting the "sorry, i dont give out my number, but you can give me yours". I havent had this happen ever until a few months ago, now its happened a few times. Seriously, im in a slump and its hurting my confidence. Now heres some weird stuff, like in the movie Good Luck Chuck, ive dated/talked to/whatever about 15 girls in the last 6 months, 6 of them are engaged already. Anyway, what can I do to get myself out of this slump?
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i seem to have hit a slump
- Thread starter jamescr73
- Start date
Killer_Demo
Don Juan
i'm in a slump too... i kno exactly how ya feel. everyday dont give up...eventually if ur persistant then u should be where u wanna get to.
MacAvoy
Banned
Just keep plugging away. I only went through a slump once and it was because I wasn't interacting with available women much so I don't have much in terms of other advice. But I can draw parallels to playing poker and going through losing spells. Part of it is you just have to keep plugging away but part of it, is you got to take a step back, and you likely don't realize it, but you've probably changed something in your game, its a matter of figuring out what it is.
Just try different strategies and you should eventually find one that works for you again and slowly get your confidence back. The other part is, your confidence might be whats affecting you, its like a snowball effect. The only thing I can recommend on that front is pretend to have confidence aka fake it until you got it. Before you approach, build yourself up in your mind, tell yourself you can do it, your the man, that your going to nail this approach, then go in for the kill with that mindset.
Keep us posted in the coming weeks how you make out.
Just try different strategies and you should eventually find one that works for you again and slowly get your confidence back. The other part is, your confidence might be whats affecting you, its like a snowball effect. The only thing I can recommend on that front is pretend to have confidence aka fake it until you got it. Before you approach, build yourself up in your mind, tell yourself you can do it, your the man, that your going to nail this approach, then go in for the kill with that mindset.
Keep us posted in the coming weeks how you make out.
hearing this line is not acceptable! :nono:jamescr73 said:
right away i can see that something is wrong with your game if you re getting this line from multiple girls. I usually get really good results as far as # closes because of the attitude i display while getting their number.
NEVER ASK! i always say "gimme your number and we ll ... (insert fun activity you ve been talking to her about)". Only had one girl refuse to give me her number right away (a gorgeous blonde) but i still got it by the end of the night.
as far as the slump i feel you brother, sometimes it seems like you can't do anything right... but PU goes in streaks, so keep your head up and plow away, in 2 months you ll probably be posting about having two many plates on your hands. just don't loose confidence in your game.
MikeYikes122
Master Don Juan
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Do you watch or play basketball? When basketball players are in a slump, they'll try to knock down an easy shot or a lay up just so they can experience a little bit of success to get themselves going again.jamescr73 said:
I suggest you do the same thing. I'm not saying you should go chubby chasing, but you should lower your standards a little and nail a chic who might be slightly unattractive. I'm willing to bet you are coming off a little desperate with all these girls who have flaked on you, and girls can smell desperation on a guy from miles away. I think experiencing just a little bit of success should solve your problems.
MacAvoy
Banned
Actually now that I think about this, this is exactly why I keep a couple of FB's at bay. I don't see them often, maybe 2-3 times a year but they are always there when I need them. That way you don't have to lower your standards. I've had these FB's for probably 5-10 years.
I have a couple of girls i could call right now and have come over, but thats not the point. I am a good looking guy. I go to the gym 3-4 times a week and eat right, so I am in physically good shape. My situation is weird, i seriously think something is wrong inside my head. When I meet a girl that is totally interested in me, i lose interest in her. I pick out her flaws and I dwell on them, and eventually I stop talking to them. One girl that I took home on new years snored, and I cant deal with that because I am a very light sleeper. I haven't talked to her much, or hung out with her since. But shes and attractive girl, but also too tall for my likings. Then I meet a chick thats not quite as hot, but just my style body type wise/personality wise, and when I cant get the number I dwell on it, and it pisses me off. This throws off my game. A year ago I could literally pull any girl I wanted. I would get 3-4 numbers a night. Now I haven't gotten a number in 3 weeks. Of course the girls number I got 3 weeks ago flaked on me 2 nights in a row, then sent me a text a week later saying she hadn't returned my call because she had been really sick, but would get a hold of me when she was feeling better. This was a week ago, and I'm doubting she is still sick. I'm pretty sure this means, I'm too busy for you so I'm going to make up an excuse to make you feel better about the situation, and possibly keep you on a string in case my date with _____ doesn't work out". Oh well.
YOUNG CASINOVA
Don Juan
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You sound like you're going through the EXACT same problems as I am. I'm picky too when it comes to chicks simply because I don't wanna just f*ck anything... and at the same time when I'm "Hunting for females" i'm still looking for somebody I honestly like and can actually tell right off if I would give it a chance as far as a relationship. Lately... I'll meet that pretty girl I'm looking for... but she Eventually flakes. I'm not sure If she feels I like her too much... or if she's just not interested any more. It's kinda confusing, but you just gotta keep knocking on the doors! Keep your head up Pimp!
Being_the_Don
Master Don Juan
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So you date below your standards in the hopes it will boost your confidence and land attractive women. Meanwhile the hotties see you with someone unattractive and immediately think less of you because of it so your confidence continues to go down and you continue to date below your standards until you eventually reach the bottom of the barrel. That's the way to boost your self esteem.MikeYikes122 said:
Never ever lower your standards. The only thing you can do is keep going, persistence eventually pays off.
