How'd I handle this situation with gf

[SeeThruIt]

Having a cutie on your arm means you have to at least "pretend" that's how it normally is: a hot chick is always with you. This means you have to display a certain amount of confidence.

Myself, when my frau is working the crowd and dude's are flirting, of course, in my head, I'm thinking: "uh-oh". But my mouth doesn't say that...

Without fail, while I think about her antics, I let my eyes find a hotter chick at the venue. Instead of continuing to think about her antics, I let my thoughts drift to an opener on the hotter chick. That usually gets my mind right.

Then, I let her catch me staring at the hotter chick instead of overtly calling out her crap behavior. When she looks to see what I'm staring at, the message is loud and clear: her actions WILL yield unintended results.

It's a form of agree/escalate.

Of course, women have done the freak-out thing about me simply looking at the other hot chick. I simply look at whichever dude, then back at her, then raise an eyebrow as if to say, "Oh?" No words. She knows her game; you know her game; she knows you're winning at her game.

Which, of course, can escalate the chick's dramatics, to which I'm renowned for offering a stern look and cutting them off with: "Wanna talk about it?" Anyone who knows me knows they won't like the pending outcome. They now have a choice between having their day wrecked, or cutting the crap, with little or no words to follow.
:box:

Nice. Unfortunately in that particular instance for me all the females there were with their bfs or husbands. Only two single dudes were present. But good thing to keep in mind.

 

[SeeThruIt]

So I guess this really bothered her because she brought it up again.

It appears she's only seeing it as me not liking who she is, so she ended things saying she wants someone who'll accept her personality just the way it is.

I have to say I'm confused here, I thought in a relationship you expressed concerns and talked them out maturely and reached compromises to bring it to the next level.

Apparently she can't take criticism? And she's convinced there's a guy out there who will tolerate her behavior. She's willing to let go of everything she liked about us for that one quality. Blows my mind a little because I've never had a relationship end on something like that, it's generally been more severe.

Now I'm a little discouraged to start any other relationship if trying to express things is going to create distance and ultimately a means to an end.

I get the advice offered about not "talking about it" but at the same time it leaves me puzzled. Can someone chime in here, feel like everything I knew/thought I was doing right is actually wrong.

 

[SeeThruIt]

I'm sorry you're going through this, broham.

It seems to me that if she's breaking up with you over this little thing, there's something else going on.

My gut is telling me that she'll be back quickly. She just wants to see how long it will take YOU to come running back to HER.
Don't take the bait brother man.

She will come back. Just another subconscious sh!t test on her part.

Is it worth getting back with this one if she even does try coming back? I mean outside this little issue everything else was better than most relationships I've had.

I know most will say never take back an ex but this one is confusing for sure.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear SeeThruIt,
GP has it right..."One way to handle it is to flirt with other women in front of her. when she confronts you about it, then you have the conversation."

 

[RangerMIke]

Never argue with a woman because she ALWAYS wins. Having discussions about her behavior and how you 'feel' makes you sound like a woman. What did you expect when you started this discussion with your girl... that she would say "Oh honey, I'm sorry I didn't realize my flirting with my co-workers... who I BTW spend more time with than you would bother you... I'll stop that immediately." Her response to your conversation was completely predictable. She turned it on you... that it is YOUR problem with her personality.

Guys you have to stop having these relationship discussions with your women. It makes you sound like a chick. If you want to keep your women happy where they aren't flirting with others dudes .... no need to 'chat' about it... just show her more affection and respect. By challeging her on her behavior you are indicating a lack of trust... which implies a lack of respect... this does not help you.

 

[SeeThruIt]

Update: A friend saw my ex on a dating site and said her profile mentions wanting a guy who makes at least 50k a year and can hang with her friends (referencing how I was friendly to them but wasn't all that interested due to me being more of an introvert)

Funny thing is her friends constantly brought up my job to her and she'd always defend me because I have skills and potential just having a hard time finding a job in the field I want so I'm just a laborer at this point.

She made more money than me but is in debt and I never once complained about money or even struggled. It's just funny how friends can run someone's life. She'd always talk about how perfect I was for her and how happy she is and money isn't important because she already dated someone who made a lot and it wasn't that great.

F*cking b*tches

 

[SeeThruIt]

Yeah, I was in a similar boat financially. My ex made up all sorts of bs about why we broke up...not romantic enough, not attracted to her, blah blah. Finally she conjured up that "I think it was really about the money." Ya think :crazy:

Let me explain what happened:

1. She IS an attention wh0re, at her core.
2. She CAN suppress, to a limited extent, her wh0rings if her IL is sufficiently high, but not forever.
3. Her IL dropped, in part due to the money issue but in part due to her inherent wh0re nature.
4. When you confronted her, she realized she was no longer willing to suppress her wh0re self just to keep you happy.
5. She is now trying to understand why it was ok for her to do what she did, like gold digging and you not being social enough.

I agree. Definitely seemed like she dug up any negativity about me and those two things were only things she could find. Makes me feel good though, shows her true shallow ways.

I'm sure she'll find someone with money and can "socialize" but won't be compatible any other way. Amazes me what women settle for.