How to make ex want me (increase my value)

[Neon Owl]

Am going round to hers this weekend for the night (she's now my fb) and would like tips on how to increase her desire for me. I'm already planning on giving her the fvcking of her life and being more dominant in bed (she loves this) but would like other tips on how to make her wish she still had me when I leave.
For the record I turned a bit afc near the end of the relationship giving her too much attention and always being available etc. told her I loved her and she stopped saying it back the last few times we were still together.
She's now on the dating site we met on pretty much constantly all day...should I ask her how it's going and if she's had any dates or would that seem like I'm missing her? On the other hand it could show that I'm not bothered if I'm willing to hear about her moving on.

Other general tips would be good too, like should I do lots of hot/cold when I see her? Limit my affection?

 

[cordoncordon]

Am going round to hers this weekend for the night (she's now my fb) and would like tips on how to increase her desire for me. I'm already planning on giving her the fvcking of her life and being more dominant in bed (she loves this) but would like other tips on how to make her wish she still had me when I leave.
For the record I turned a bit afc near the end of the relationship giving her too much attention and always being available etc. told her I loved her and she stopped saying it back the last few times we were still together.
She's now on the dating site we met on pretty much constantly all day...should I ask her how it's going and if she's had any dates or would that seem like I'm missing her? On the other hand it could show that I'm not bothered if I'm willing to hear about her moving on.

Other general tips would be good too, like should I do lots of hot/cold when I see her? Limit my affection?

How about not seeing her at all? Trust me when I say this, she is just biding her time with you until she finds someone better, and then she is going to leave you and never look back. You are her security blanket. She doesn't want to be totally alone so she fawks you now and then and likes the attention you give her.

YOUR ONLY HOPE would be to totally cut off all contact, scare her into believing you are gone for good, and perhaps that will bring her back. (though ex's are ex's for a reason so IMO you are better off going no contact because you are done with her for good, not to try and get her back). But anyway, this mode you are in now with her where you sleep with her but she still goes out and looks for other guys? Total losing proposition for you.

 

[Neon Owl]

I see what you're saying and I agree she's using me for affection/attention until someone else comes along but I'm also doing the same with her to an extent. I don't really want to get back with her properly I just want her to start chasing me again...not sure why exactly maybe it's an ego thing.
For the record I am the one that broke up with her so it's unlikely she'll ever ask to get back together as she has very low confidence so wouldn't risk the rejection.

She has been contacting me regularly since the split and the last time I went over to stay the night (first time since we broke up) she started getting massively jealous asking me who was txting me (she asked to see my phone after I got a couple txts through) and why I started growing my hair again (she always told me she didn't like my shaved hair) after I told her I'd heard from other people I looked better with hair she started asking if other girls had said that.

 

[Swampcamel]

The greater your disinterest, the greater her interest. The greater your interest in other girls, the greater her interest.

OH PARADOX SPARE ME! You have to actualize that disinterest instead of faking it. And, at that point, you very likely won't want to. Have other people to lay, and you'll ask yourself, "Why her and all the problems she makes for me instead of these others?" At which point, you set the conditions for laying her and her chasing you without any sacrifice or compensation on your part.

Sadly, your months away from that. Stop thinking about it, and the pieces may fall into place one day. As long as you're wrapping your head around it, you'll just be masochistically entangling yourself in her dramatic BS. Insert eastern philosophy can't-find-when-you're-looking-for-it quote here.

 

[j0504s]

How about not seeing her at all? Trust me when I say this, she is just biding her time with you until she finds someone better, and then she is going to leave you and never look back. You are her security blanket. She doesn't want to be totally alone so she fawks you now and then and likes the attention you give her.

YOUR ONLY HOPE would be to totally cut off all contact, scare her into believing you are gone for good, and perhaps that will bring her back. (though ex's are ex's for a reason so IMO you are better off going no contact because you are done with her for good, not to try and get her back). But anyway, this mode you are in now with her where you sleep with her but she still goes out and looks for other guys? Total losing proposition for you.

LISTEN TO THIS MAN...he is 100% correct trust me...cordoncordon knows this better then any one i know...he helped me big time in my break up....please for your sake listen to every word he says...this not an option!

 

[zinc4]

Am going round to hers this weekend for the night (she's now my fb) and would like tips on how to increase her desire for me. I'm already planning on giving her the fvcking of her life and being more dominant in bed (she loves this) but would like other tips on how to make her wish she still had me when I leave.
For the record I turned a bit afc near the end of the relationship giving her too much attention and always being available etc. told her I loved her and she stopped saying it back the last few times we were still together.
She's now on the dating site we met on pretty much constantly all day...should I ask her how it's going and if she's had any dates or would that seem like I'm missing her? On the other hand it could show that I'm not bothered if I'm willing to hear about her moving on.

Other general tips would be good too, like should I do lots of hot/cold when I see her? Limit my affection?

I don't trust any woman that is always on a dating site...single or not..she sounds low value to me...and if she is your ex then i would leave it be...she obviously thinks she can do better than you...