Looking for some input here guys, I find myself at a crossroads of life. Im certain that im overthinking this but its a tough issue.
On one hand you can be a perennial bachelor and never really become exclusive for one girl, on the other hand you can settle down get married have kids etc., which in our age basically equates to monogamy and potential financial ruin in divorce - although arguably having children is financial ruin regardless of the marriage.
I dont have a strong feeling one way or the other, and try to be a take it as it comes kind of guy. This raises the question, what is "it", and how does one know if it has come? In your experience is there that one girl that you say, yup thats the one and marriage and kids makes sense? Is this just "oneitis" and you should always keep your options open for new women? Is "oneitis" just a term used by lifetime single men who havent found a good match to justify not having a family? Do you ever stop doubting if a girl is right for you?
I ask these questions sincerely because I genuinely dont have an answer for them, and im not sure if an answer is even possible. The best I can figure is go with your gut, and follow what feels right. Dont become exclusive unless you are damn sure she is it and she makes you really feel alive and a better person, but then you are setting her up as this irreplaceable treasure that you finally found and would be ruined if you lose her.
You see my dilemma, and perhaps you are familiar with this conversation in your own mind. The mind always wants an answer one way or the other I suppose, maybe we just cannot ever decide?
On one hand you can be a perennial bachelor and never really become exclusive for one girl, on the other hand you can settle down get married have kids etc., which in our age basically equates to monogamy and potential financial ruin in divorce - although arguably having children is financial ruin regardless of the marriage.
I dont have a strong feeling one way or the other, and try to be a take it as it comes kind of guy. This raises the question, what is "it", and how does one know if it has come? In your experience is there that one girl that you say, yup thats the one and marriage and kids makes sense? Is this just "oneitis" and you should always keep your options open for new women? Is "oneitis" just a term used by lifetime single men who havent found a good match to justify not having a family? Do you ever stop doubting if a girl is right for you?
I ask these questions sincerely because I genuinely dont have an answer for them, and im not sure if an answer is even possible. The best I can figure is go with your gut, and follow what feels right. Dont become exclusive unless you are damn sure she is it and she makes you really feel alive and a better person, but then you are setting her up as this irreplaceable treasure that you finally found and would be ruined if you lose her.
You see my dilemma, and perhaps you are familiar with this conversation in your own mind. The mind always wants an answer one way or the other I suppose, maybe we just cannot ever decide?
