okay i really need help on this. i'm sure my problem is too basic for most of you but i really need help. i'm a pretty good looking guy and no doubt my girlfriend's very attracted to me. i'm in college and she's in her last year of high school. the thing is every morning i would pick her up from her house and drop her off to school. i would walk with her to her first period class and i would take a long walk by myself back to my car. everyday i would do this. sometimes i would wake up late and she'd call me and would ask me where i'am. right away i would brush my teeth and hurry on to her house in minutes. i'm very attracted to this girl to the point that i would do almost anything for her and i hate it cuz i feel that she has the control over me and i feel that with me doing everything and being there for her all the time takes the attraction away if you know what i mean. it's almost as if she takes me for granted which i really hate. i came kind of pretty late on this dating scene and it's safe to say that i don't know much about girls or women. I NEED TO GET HER ATTRACTION FOR ME BACK. can anyone make this possible?...i feel like i'm being clingy or needy or whatever...sucks so bad.
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How to get back her attraction
- Thread starter vagrant
- Start date
Dannyrt34
Master Don Juan
It would sound simple to just say "start applying the DJ principles you have learned on her". But your problem is a complicated one, you have already came across to her as an AFC. She now sees you as somebody she can control. For future reference, you need to establish a manly, DJish opinion of you in her mind from the start. It's easy to get a girl to form an opinion of you, it's nearly impossible for you to change it.
You need to start now to have any hope, tell her she needs to find a ride to school, or that she owes you something for all ur hard work (I like massages). Just STOP being so available all the time, and get ****y.
You need to start now to have any hope, tell her she needs to find a ride to school, or that she owes you something for all ur hard work (I like massages). Just STOP being so available all the time, and get ****y.
Interesting.
Old, but interesting nonetheless.
Just a fair warning, you might get shot down for being a 'newb' to the concepts, although that should be nothing that stops you from seeking out the information you need to improve your game, as you're already doing. On that I salute you.
Anyways, the easier method would be to just do your homework. A lot of these guys here who've gone from a social dud to a stud, have really put in their time... reading books, ordering personal improvement cds, and going through the fire of trial and error. You're dealing with a community of men who aren't taking no for an answer.
The other, probably more applicable solution would be this: give her the gift of missing you. Pretty recognizable concept, if you've been around. Credit David DeAngelo. Spend some time away from her. Find some other things that you would want to do by yourself, for yourself, if you hadn't had her in your life. Take up a sport you can play, study some subjects by yourself, basically, find an area of your life where you would like to improve, and work on it - by yourself.
This accomplishes two things for you:
1. It takes your mind off of her. When you start enjoying your own company more than you enjoy company with others, the irony is, others start enjoying your company as well. The saying goes, "I don't need to attract others to myself, I just need to be attracted enough to myself for them." Try it.
2. Piggybacking on reason #1, you'll get a more interested girlfriend in return. Ultimately, women don't want clingy men. They don't want men who're going to seek out their guidance in a relationship. They want a man who they could cling to, and whose leadership they could submit to. Be that guy, or she'll find him for you... without you.
Hope this helps, make the most of it champ.
Old, but interesting nonetheless.
Just a fair warning, you might get shot down for being a 'newb' to the concepts, although that should be nothing that stops you from seeking out the information you need to improve your game, as you're already doing. On that I salute you.
Anyways, the easier method would be to just do your homework. A lot of these guys here who've gone from a social dud to a stud, have really put in their time... reading books, ordering personal improvement cds, and going through the fire of trial and error. You're dealing with a community of men who aren't taking no for an answer.
The other, probably more applicable solution would be this: give her the gift of missing you. Pretty recognizable concept, if you've been around. Credit David DeAngelo. Spend some time away from her. Find some other things that you would want to do by yourself, for yourself, if you hadn't had her in your life. Take up a sport you can play, study some subjects by yourself, basically, find an area of your life where you would like to improve, and work on it - by yourself.
This accomplishes two things for you:
1. It takes your mind off of her. When you start enjoying your own company more than you enjoy company with others, the irony is, others start enjoying your company as well. The saying goes, "I don't need to attract others to myself, I just need to be attracted enough to myself for them." Try it.
2. Piggybacking on reason #1, you'll get a more interested girlfriend in return. Ultimately, women don't want clingy men. They don't want men who're going to seek out their guidance in a relationship. They want a man who they could cling to, and whose leadership they could submit to. Be that guy, or she'll find him for you... without you.
Hope this helps, make the most of it champ.
first of all...what the heck is AFC?!?!?!...wait..WUHHH?!?!...start applying the DJ principles i've learned on her!?!?!?...what does that supposed to mean?...grrrr i'm sounding like a real noob here.Dannyrt34 said:
you're right. she does see me as the guy she can control and that's because i'm letting her and cuz my stupid brain is telling me that THAT is exactly what she likes. someone who would give her eveything and be with her all the time. the thing is, i really need to know whether girls are really attracted to those guys who they can NOT control or if it's merely a myth!!!!!
number 2 sounds very scary...see, the thing is i know i can be that which ever she wants but the thing is i'm so dumb when it comes to chicks that i really have no idea what the hell they want. i don't know the traits that women are looking for. looking back i've told her so much about me that shows how weak i'am...grrrrr...if i don't do something i'm really going to loose this chick which i don't want to happen cuz she's definitely a keeper. what i want is for her to see me and be afraid she'll loose me cuz in her mind the next chick would be the luckiest b8tch on earth.Cruise said:
insanity
Master Don Juan
men in general seem to forget this word when dating a woman. "NO". that has to be the best way of keeping attraction in the eyes of a woman. sure you can be nice and do things for them but don't let them take advantage of you. i use the word no quite a bit and sure they huff and puff but don't give in. they learn respect that way.
I never said it wasn't going to be scary.vagrant said:
Look. Let me break it down to you like this: The s.hit is all evolution. You hear what the fukc I'm saying? Evolution. Evolve. Grow. The strong survive. The weak lose out. Rich get richer. Poor get poorer. Predators and prey. S.hit like that.
Women don't think to themselves how nice you are, or how good you are at being a silent pushover as the world passes by you. She doesn't want to go to the movies with you to see a hero. She's not thinking to herself - "I want the most boring, unintelligent, unambitious little b.itch of a weakling... where can I find him?" She wants you to be the hero. The head cheerleader wants to get f.ucked by the captain of the football team. Not the waterboy.
Guess what separates the waterboy from the Captain?
Balls.
Nothing more, nothing less. Some big... fat... hairy... obtrusively... undeniably... succulent... BALLLLLLLLS.
Stop being a coward and create your own life. Or the world's going to change it for you, and own you in exchange.
damn!...that sh*t went straight to my brain. i can't even explain what's going through my mind right now but i'm ready to give it a shot. i know i got her bad from the beginning but since we're getting deeper in the relationship and she's getting to know me better and us hanging out more and more she's getting a little comfortable. i know exactly the things i went wrong and i'm determined to make some changes cuz it'll be for the better. thanks a lot man.Cruise said: