generalization
n 1: the process of formulating general concepts by abstracting common properties of instances [syn: abstraction, generalisation] 2: reasoning from detailed facts to general principles [syn: generalisation, induction, inductive reasoning] 3: an idea having general application; "he spoke in broad generalities" [syn: generalisation, generality] 4: (psychology) transfer of a response learned to one stimulus to a similar stimulus [syn: generalisation, stimulus generalization, stimulus generalisation]
Source: WordNet ® 2.0, © 2003 Princeton University
Generalization gets a bum rap. It ougt to be used in the way it was actually intended - drawing hypothesis and conclusions from a greater, general whole of observed behavior. Pay close attention to #2, "reasoning from detailed facts to general principles [syn: generalisation, induction, inductive reasoning]." I am sorry if this process offends you, but I'm interested in the general Rule, since it,_ and not the exceptions to it, better help to predict an outcome.
OK, on to your hypothetical now. You're conflicted for a variety of reasons here so I'll take them one by one. The first is that you do not understand the gravity of committment. Committment to anything always involves a loss of options. This applies to everything - career, education, your ambitions, family etc. - not just women (which happen to trump these others in your case). A truly powerful Man jealously guards his most precious resources; his independence and his ability to maneuver. In other words his options and his ability to exercise them. True power isn't controlling others, but the degree to which you control the course of your own life and your own choices. Committment to anything ALWAYS limits this. When you step through one door, a hundred more close behind you.
Now lets put this into action. At 22 you posess far more option than I; you're simply blind to them due to lack of experience and pronounced fear of rejection. Knowing what we do about committment, would you really concede your options to a woman who would potentially be at your neck after being blackmailed with her intimacy? I always advocate that a guy remain non-exclusive and uncommitted until age 28, practicing Plate Theory until he's had experience enough to understand what he's getting into. This isn't a quest to lay as many women as humanly possible (though you may want to as well) it's to remain uncommitted until such time that he has explored options that committment would limit him from - in his personal life, his career, his education, his ambitions, etc.
My next observation is, why are you fearful of losing this girl, hypothetically? The reason; because you think you lack options. You're afraid of rejection and would rather opt for what you think is the 'sure thing'. My answer to your second point would be, it would be better if she saw you as uncommitted. She would pursue you if she had a genuine IL, a genuine desire. We only chase what runs away from us. In fact the guy she'd cheat on you with will be the guy who WOULDN'T committ to her. She has to earn his attention, your's is a given. People will pay for what has value; what's given easily and freely is taken for granted and often worthless. And what you're giving her is your independence and your options, is she worth that? Will she appreciate that? Will she respect that sacrifice?
