How to become more sexual

[The Experience]

The advice I hate the most is when they say to "maintain eye contact" and only for 1 reason. EVERY time I think of a guy making prolonged eye contact to a woman, the first thing that comes to mind is that she'll think "Oh my God, that guy won't stop looking at me...Is he a psycho killer? I'm calling the blues!!"

Basically, is there one guy here who can tell me something understandable that can make sense of it and pry the "psycho killer" part outta my head so I can go "OOOOhhhh!! Ok, I get it!!" Because until then...I ain't comfortable with the idea of doing that...

When you're looking at a woman and making eye contact remember that she's not only looking at your eyes, she's looking at your WHOLE FACE. And what makes your whole face look more attractive while you guys are staring at each other? YOUR SMILE.

So when you guys are oogling each other remember to smile, if she's even remotely interested she will smile back. And quit with the weird thoughts, how about thinking 'I'm a badass motha****a, motha****a'.

Actually just thinking that she might think that your a psycho killer would make me smile and laugh, just because it's funny to me.

 

[f283000]

Not sure if this has been mentioned already

BUY CLOTHING THAT FITS/IS SMALLER THAN THAT YOU ARE USED TO BUYING!

It took me a long time to finally get out of my high school mindset of wearing shirts 2 sizes too big, baggy lose clothing etc.

I guess one of the reasons was because every guy around me dressed the same way and I didn't want to look different. I saw every guy out there wearing loose fitting clothing that I thought I was doing no wrong and I couldn't do better.

I remember putting on a long sleeve dress shirt which I was ready to take back because I thought it wasn't big enough then I realized looking at the mirror "you know what I look good/organized in this." It was that moment I realized that getting clothing that fits me good rather than clothing that is bigger than what I need is actually better. Women were noticing me more too. Clothing that matches my size fit me better and made me look better.

I'm not saying to buy muscle tight guido style shirts and clothing but just buy clothing that is the right size rather than bigger than your actual size. If you're a medium don't buy a large just cause it's a little bigger (you know you do). Buy what fits you right.

 

[ArcBound]

When you're looking at a woman and making eye contact remember that she's not only looking at your eyes, she's looking at your WHOLE FACE. And what makes your whole face look more attractive while you guys are staring at each other? YOUR SMILE.

So when you guys are oogling each other remember to smile, if she's even remotely interested she will smile back. And quit with the weird thoughts, how about thinking 'I'm a badass motha****a, motha****a'.

Actually just thinking that she might think that your a psycho killer would make me smile and laugh, just because it's funny to me.

http://bodyodd.msnbc.msn.com/_news/...nt-to-catch-a-ladys-eye-dont-smile-study-says

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/05/25/brooding-men-smiling-wome_n_866979.html

Science says smiling makes men less sexually attractive actually lol.

 

[Diaforetikos]

A very good example of a guy being sexual is Ryan Gosling's character in Crazy, Stupid, Love. The first half of the movie, he's teaching Steve Carell's character how to be a man again.

Almost everything he teaches him is very basic, except for insisting on buying a girl a drink. That's a no no. She has to earn it. But, from the high-five approach, to getting her to interest you, it's all pretty solid info.

Watch for his tonality. That was one of my sticking points. He does it very well.

 

[Johnny Danger]

Great thread! I'm definitely bookmarking this one.

As for contributions--

1) Do whatever you have to do, work out, groom etc. to get to a point where you can stand alone naked in your room and feel a gut level that you're a man, you have needs, and you're ready for and deserving of sex. Then think about what a shame it would be to deprive all those girls out there who would love to find just that.

2) Expand your social life, make good female friends where you can, and construct a "pre-qualified" image for yourself that will help you pass quicker through comfort and into seduction.

3) If you have sexual trauma in your past, go out and start seeing a mental health professional regularly... tell them about it!

:rockon:

 

[schttrj]

This, all this.
Don't go too overboard though, if it's too overboard and all the time with every girl in front of every girl then you come across as a man-slvt and that will put off quite a few girls because if they stereotype you as a man-slvt then they could assume you have a reputation for sleeping around, this may or may not put a girl off but within that stereotype is the reputation for kissing-and-telling, people become slvts because everyone knows what and who they're up to, that can well be a dealbreaker.
However for people who are never sexual don't worry about that too much because it's unlikely you'll go overboard.

I would say first impressions are really important to be sexual, it can be difficult to bring it back the longer you've known a girl without being sexual.

You don't have to say anything. Sexuality is in the vibe. The way you say Hi, the way you shake hands, the way you present yourself...I would say, sexuality equals more or less to confidence. Confident and assertive people are sexual!

 

[Tovansky]

to become more sexual, you have to embrace your sexuality (I can't believe that I need to repost the golden rule) and I talk from experience not only theory.

First. You need to be confident. If you are turned off with the idea of being a jerk and a55hole, then you can do pretty well just being a man, a confident man. How to be confident? Like yourself, heck, love yourself. How to love yourself? Now your qualities and polish it.

Second. Embrace and worship the fact that you are a man with sexual desire to have a women. Pound in that little brain of yours that women are no goddesses. They are a sexual human being that thirsts for men. There is no puzzle, there is no hidden riddle. They are just women.

Third. Act on it. How? Practice, practice and practice. Kino. And other stuff. I am pretty sure you can learn a lot more in the Don Juan tips and Don Juan Bible.

So, stop looking at the monitor and get your a55 out there in doing.

 

[Wildebeest]

Im loving this thread

In my limited experience, being sexy and attractive is more of a mindset than an objective quality. You become sexy because you know it. You just know it, and it becomes true.

 

[iwanttofight]

Ok people ill tell you what sexy is, being sexy means that you would Fu%$ yourself ! Thats it. If you are sexy, than if you look in the mirror, you would say to yourself damn, look at that sexy guy I would bang him if I was a chick or if I was gay I would rock his world. Whenever I see myself in the mirror I get a stiffy for myself, its strange but true

 

[Mike32ct]

Agreed. Actually closely fitting or "slim fit" is the style right now.

For years, I was brainwashed into wearing everything slightly baggy. Anything remotely snug was considered gay. That is NOT so anymore.

If you have clothes that are baggy but still stylish, get them tailored. Even if you tuck in a shirt, if it's too big, extra material will hang off the sides. That's not attractive. A good tailor can take that in.

If you are buying a jacket or sport coat, get it just big enough that you can button it.

Not sure if this has been mentioned already

BUY CLOTHING THAT FITS/IS SMALLER THAN THAT YOU ARE USED TO BUYING!

It took me a long time to finally get out of my high school mindset of wearing shirts 2 sizes too big, baggy lose clothing etc.

I guess one of the reasons was because every guy around me dressed the same way and I didn't want to look different. I saw every guy out there wearing loose fitting clothing that I thought I was doing no wrong and I couldn't do better.

I remember putting on a long sleeve dress shirt which I was ready to take back because I thought it wasn't big enough then I realized looking at the mirror "you know what I look good/organized in this." It was that moment I realized that getting clothing that fits me good rather than clothing that is bigger than what I need is actually better. Women were noticing me more too. Clothing that matches my size fit me better and made me look better.

I'm not saying to buy muscle tight guido style shirts and clothing but just buy clothing that is the right size rather than bigger than your actual size. If you're a medium don't buy a large just cause it's a little bigger (you know you do). Buy what fits you right.

 

[xliang]

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[Yahooey]

It's about being comfortable looking a girl in the eyes, imagining what you would do to her, and allowing yourself to get hard without flinching internally or externally.

If your looking for some practical exercises (I guess these kind of depend on your level of game):

Try going to a packed supermarket, picking up condoms and nothing else. Go to the sexiest cashier to pay. No looking down or away. No defiant stare (creepy). Nice and easy - you're getting laid and you need more rubbers.

Sit somewhere were there is a lot of female traffic. Spot a hot body, slowly look up until your eyes meet and smile slowly.

If you can do this and other similar overtly sexual things comfortably, you're there.

 

[blueeyedgent]

There's no doubt this DJ stuff works. Last Saturday I ran into a friend of a friend at the bar that I had met once before at a xmas party for work almost a year ago. We ended up getting very hot and heavy on the dance floor, far beyond what she would normally call her boundaries. She was a bit embarrassed about that the next day when I called her but she said she was thinking almost a day about why she behaved like that.

So I flat out asked her what it was and she texted me back later on. Verbatim: (bolded the key points)

"The way you looked at me made me feel sexy and desirable. The fact that you can dance also turned me on. You have a friendly face with a genuine smile. Your facial expression was encouraging my behaviour; kind of asking for more. You kept touching me at the bar and on the dance floor which probably aroused me as well."

This is a very educated, wealthy and hot woman a few years my senior. Not some dime a dozen, gullible young woman. This stuff works!

Got a date with her tonight. Have a feeling its gonna be a long night

 

[Johnny Danger]

Exercise more and follow a healthy diet. If you're fat, drop the weight. Fat deposits secrete estrogen.

Stop watching chick flicks and other bull**** on TV that shame the male gender.

Accept yourself for who you are and what you are.

I'm curious-- are we saying romantic media, pop (feel good) music, manifests back in your behavior? Ie. if I wanna toughen up a bit and become more assertive, should I listen to gangster rap?

 

[Chamber36]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OraQHpHvB3I&feature=related

 

[NotAgain]

What if you guys have been friends for a few years? I mean, we do kino (massage each other, touch, hugs etc) but I've found sexual talk is almost non-existent besides the occasional innuendo.

How would I change the way she thinks of me? Would you just open up and gradually add sexual talk or joking innuendos to conversations with her?

 

[blueeyedgent]

You'll be able to hit 20 women in the time it takes to get a 10% chance of having sex with a woman who has filed you in the friends zone.

 

[AllJackedUp]

Girl Friends

I'm a dude and I have a ton of girl friends. In fact, most of my friends are girls. Sure, it's nice to hang out with the guys and drink some beer/watch the game. But at the end of the day, your buddies are out looking for the same thing you are. My girlfriends on the other hand, they have a ton of connections to hot chicks. I can't tell you how many times my girl friends have opened doors for me (or should I say legs?). Plus, I don't have to worry about competing with any of my buddies when it comes to bangin' some new hotty.

Now I'm not going to lie, sometimes having girl friends has its disadvantages.. but you just have to learn to turn it around and use it to your advantage. Whenever we go out to eat, they gossip the entire time. However, I've learned to use this to my advantage. For example, they'll talk about how so and so is unhappy in her relationship, or how so and so is looking for some action off the side, or how so and so wants to take a break from her relationship to "explore." You know who the first dude is that gets that information? ME. I've got a huge upper hand when it comes to that crap and let me tell you, it's worked like a charm. Don't be afraid to have platonic relationships with females. It took me a long time to figure out that they're often the "gatekeepers." They'll put in a good word for you or introduce you and then from there on out, it's up to you. After you've been introduced so many times, you'll start making more female friends and they'll introduce you to their hot friends. It's never ending.

Whenever we go out to the bar, I look like a damn pimp with all of my girl friends but it actually helps. The reason being, most women want what they can't have.. this means I get approached more often or that I'll get the "stare down" a lot more. Once I break the ice and let them know that I'm single and not actually dating any of my girl friends , it almost always results in me getting her number.

 

[TheMale]

hey people

quick question about being sexual with words :
what is the limit to not being a pervert ?

 

[BillieAnn]

Hello! I think these guys answer to your question
http://www.youtube.com/user/datinginthezone#p/u/4/lFWcWbJ3vq8