How do I not appear beta around people who smoke or do drugs?

[Guitar_Whizz]

Hi folks, I've encountered this weird thing recently....I myself don't smoke or take drugs, I'm a fairly clean living guy. Some of the social situations I've been in lately have been with friends or family who do smoke and do take drugs.

When they offer me some drugs, like weed or a bucket or a pipe, or some speed or pills, I have to say no, as I honestly have no interest. But everyone else in the social group does the drugs, and keep pressuring me by saying 'go on, we're all having some, what's wrong with you?' etc.

It's almost as if I'm beta or 'a wimp' or somehow 'less manly' because I don't want to take a drug. And I'm really ****ed off about this.

I choose my friends carefully and am weeding out those who do this sort of thing. But I do happen to like my cousins, the only thing is that they all do recreational drugs, and I am the odd one out, so it makes socialising with them difficult.

Basically, I need some ideas how to deal with this in an alpha way. I want to tell them I'm not interested, without appearing snobbish or less manly etc. I'm pretty ****ing angry as I write this, cos I can't ****ing believe I've lost my frame here.

Thanks.

 

[reset]

Here's my take on this. A lot of people do drugs and that's their choice, but I think that maybe they feel some shame or stigma about it at the same time (it's all coming back to me, lol). That peer pressure is actually them being a little taken aback that you have self control, and they don't. So in that way maybe you're perceived as a threat. I'm sure after doing some speed maybe they've thought "this is kind of lame" but their other friends are there to reinforce it. This is not a road you want to go down. You WILL regret it if you give in, trust me.

So, what you do is just say no thanks. No explanations. No thanks. Then go on about talking about whatever you're talking about. Eventually they will stop offering. It's always a big deal to get a clean person to crack, to go back, like they want to initiate you. It's stupid.

If you not taking drugs is a PROBLEM to them, then obviously, you're hanging with the wrong people.

What kind of guy goes back on his principles just so he'll fit in? Does that seem "alpha" to you?

 

[Enryu]

ditch him?
its easy
you dont have to be around him when he goes out
just be around him when he doesnt goes out.
For example playing basketball.... or just simply hanging out.
And believe me while hanging out and some ppl are doing weed it isnt as bad as not taking weed as with being in a disco and not taking pills for them.

And smoking is the least problem. As a non-smoker i could get more smokes than someone who smokes... everyone wants me to smoke but i simply say no, leave off a joke or two about Yeah maybe i should start to be cooool ( you really have to make it sound cheesy ) and everyone is cracking up

As GI Joe once said fukk that $hit and get yourself a biatch ....

 

[The Bat]

The irony of you posting this thread on 4/20 got my head all up in the air.

Anyway, you're not appearing beta when you turn down their offer. You stand out, in a positive manner. Even smokers will later admit that the guy who turned down the offer was a smart guy.

Remember, an "alpha" male doesn't care at all about how he appears to others.

If you want to appear "alpha", you can pull a C&F joke like, "You're going to need one sober person to drive your retarded ass to the hospital." Personally, I think pulling C&F around druggies is the easiest thing to do because a) you have so much leverage on them and b) they're all high and will find anything hilarious.

 

[LostAndConfused]

Drug users who DONT respect you for refusing to do drugs are just pathetic. You don't want to be around them anyways, as wutang said, those are the ones that are betas.

The other ones will respect you for your choice...you wont be their best friends, but they'll respect you.

 

[Evzone]

Drug users who DONT respect you for refusing to do drugs are just pathetic. You don't want to be around them anyways, as wutang said, those are the ones that are betas.

The other ones will respect you for your choice...you wont be their best friends, but they'll respect you.

Damn right...dude do you think that maybe you're hanging out with the wrong crowd? I mean I'm not the morality police, but maybe something you might want to think about

 

[Guitar_Whizz]

Damn right...dude do you think that maybe you're hanging out with the wrong crowd? I mean I'm not the morality police, but maybe something you might want to think about

Thanks for the replies, guys.

Yeah, I don't hang around with these sorts of people any more, but I'm stuck with my cousins, after all they're family. From now on I'm only going to see them briefly, make my excuses to leave, and if asked about drugs I'll just say 'No thanks'.

Cheers again for your help.

 

[Master Bates]

Are you just talking about illegal drugs, or alcohol and cigarettes as well?

 

[Guitar_Whizz]

Are you just talking about illegal drugs, or alcohol and cigarettes as well?

Cigarettes too, however they know I don't smoke and they don't question that. I do drink alccohol socially, I see no problem with that.

 

[Birdem]

Drinking is just as bad as doing drugs... I do not know why everyone gives drinking a free pass...I do not know the difference of doing drugs and drinking socially its the same ****... When you think about it everyone does drugs and drinking because they are uncomfortable with who they are... Anyway why hang around people that do things you don't like doing.

 

[Bible_Belt]

When they offer me some drugs, like weed or a bucket or a pipe, or some speed or pills,

I had to look up what you meant by "bucket." In the US, they are called 'gravity bongs.' The urban dictionary actually says specifically that they are popular in England.

 

[carlitos]

i personally think theres nothing wrong if smoke a little bit of weed or **** like that...light use is ok as long as u can control it

but..if u really dont want to then u just gotta be firm about it..cus some days when i dont feel like smoking or even drinking too much i just say i dont want to cus i got **** to do..even if they pressure me i just stand my ground...it also comes down to if ur reality is stronger than theirs and options you have as in being a higher status character..not seeking their approval and having other friends other than them

 

[Enryu]

we give alcohol a free pass because it pays taxes....

 

[SikWitIt]

Smoke some weed dude seriously, the **** open's your mind to thinking like you would never do normally.

 

[DoctorLW]

uh, most drug users are betas. They don't get girls, so they get high instead. Most alphas just drink. Trust me, I've been in the drug scene for a minute.

Don't give into pressure!

This is a generalization and not true.

Clearly, you never witnessed the cocaine scene either.

 

[DoctorLW]

Hi folks, I've encountered this weird thing recently....I myself don't smoke or take drugs, I'm a fairly clean living guy. Some of the social situations I've been in lately have been with friends or family who do smoke and do take drugs.

When they offer me some drugs, like weed or a bucket or a pipe, or some speed or pills, I have to say no, as I honestly have no interest. But everyone else in the social group does the drugs, and keep pressuring me by saying 'go on, we're all having some, what's wrong with you?' etc.

It's almost as if I'm beta or 'a wimp' or somehow 'less manly' because I don't want to take a drug. And I'm really ****ed off about this.

I choose my friends carefully and am weeding out those who do this sort of thing. But I do happen to like my cousins, the only thing is that they all do recreational drugs, and I am the odd one out, so it makes socialising with them difficult.

Basically, I need some ideas how to deal with this in an alpha way. I want to tell them I'm not interested, without appearing snobbish or less manly etc. I'm pretty ****ing angry as I write this, cos I can't ****ing believe I've lost my frame here.

Thanks.

People don't look at you as less of a man because of this. Honestly it's not as big a deal to them as it is to you. They are all just dissapointed because they want you to have a good time, and think (and are probably right) that you would if you just tried it.

Of course, that's assuming you haven't tried it. If you tried it and didn't like it then turning it down is "alpha", it's not for you... and the only thing to do. If you never tried it then that is ignorance, and it is understandable as to why they might see that as "beta."

 

[PRMoon]

Don't try to aphpa over drug users. Standard game does not work becaue the rationale of not users does not translate to those who do partake. As some one who has been fully immersed into the drug scene I can say with 110 percent ceritatity that the less experience you have as a drug user, the less power you can exude over these people. The correlation is direct. Amount of experience you have correllates directly to the amount of power you have over the people around you who use on other levels of use. Believe me, I'm former drug user/dealer and I can preside over pot heads, shroomers, and coke fiends. The ONLY reason i can do this is because I know how they think, how they operate and what they want. You can not lead a people until you've walked in their shoes for a mile.

 

[steve12b]

I love how some guys here think using drugs makes you a looser or any less competant at life than a non-user. 90% of drug users just use it to enhance already worthwhile activities.

 

[Max Power]

uh, most drug users are betas.

Uh .. most guys are beta ... period. So drug use has nothing to do with being beta.

 

[SinJester]

Excuse me for not reading all the replies. I think that if you strongly say no you are actually displaying value because you are not being influenced by peer pressure and this shows you have strong values and a stong identity resulting in a strong reality. The thing is you have the be strong and cosistant with it. Just outframe them.

Like I'm sure many people have said, are you sure you want to be associated with these people?