Holy...

Fender

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oh...my...dear...lord. What is this?!?!

Don Juan himself would be ashmed to visit this part of the forum....its a total pu55y land here.

I know you guys aren't real MEN yet (stuck in the grey area between boys and man), but STILL!!!

"It's like... omg! I think this girl likes me but like, like....i dunno if she likes me and...llike..."

F*CK YOU!!! Some of you pusses talk like the girls on a cheerleading squad- :cheer:

Maybe you should consider WAKING THE F*CK UP and realise that girls are unimportant. Go find a life and start thinking for yourself!

I seriously can't imagine you guys getting girls if you keep asking retarded questions like "If she looks at me for 2.5 seconds, does it mean she likes me?" It's unimportant!

Stop letting your fluctuating hormones and the need for social approval get the best of you. I don't know who fed you this crap...but getting a girlfriend WILL NOT MAKE YOU HAPPIER. It will only make you happier if you were happy BEFORE you met her. I like to think of a girlfriend as an amplifier.

If you're already happy, getting a girlfriend will AMPLIFY your happiness.

But if you're a depressed little piece of poo (like most of you are), then getting a girlfriend will make your life WORST. You'll constantly wonder if she's gonna leave you, you'll have no control over her so she'll walk all over you, etc. (Did I mention the $$$ involved in mantaining a GF if you don't know how to handle her "properly?")

ARG!!! I sometimes wish Diesel was here so he can give you guys a brutal beating like he did with those AFC's over at gp.com

Oh, ye, that reminds me. Do you guys even know what an AFC is?!?! Cuz most of you are acting like one at the moment. Jesus...

Ok, now that I've blown off some steam, lets start doing something constructive...:D

What can we do to reduce the wuss-ness on this board?

The standard response RTFB (read the f*cking bible) obvious doesn't work cuz the bible is inhumanly long (I don't really blame anyone if they can't be crapped to read the entire thing...its like 300 pages long). The highschool bible is pretty good, but doesn't really answer the questions most people have on this forum.

The problem I think with highschoolers is:

a) Don't wanna take risks (since you'll be seeing these ppl everyday, you probably won't take many risks in case you get a bad rep).

b) Low self-esteem/confidence.

c) no experience (or wisdom as I like to call it :D )

So how do we solve these problems? Let's tackle em' one by one.

Don't wanna take risks
This one's a real b*tch. Nothing seems to be more important in HS than reputation. And taking risks can possibly mean you lose your reputation (or whatever you have left of it). Getting shot down is embarassing enough. Getting shot down while others laugh heartily at you is worst. Getting a retarded nickname like "arse-licker" is hell. But we all gotta start somewhere. I suggest you go to malls, bookstores and other public places to start working on your game. Worst comes to worst, you get b*tchslapped. But your HS reputation will be safe. Alternatively, try getting into social circles of other schools. Once you get to know a few guys, it'll be easy to spread and socialise with more and more people.

But on the topic of risk, I have to regurgitate some important info for you (credit: Juggler the PUA). Not fully committing may SEEM like a good idea, but in the end, you're just setting yourself up for failure. Whats not fully commiting?

For example, not stating your intent when asking a girl out for a date, so you can pass it off as a "social get together as friends" type thing if it goes sour or if she rejects you. Basically, making things as murky and unclear as possible so you can always pass it off as a non-sexual thing.

Metaphor time: The karate master must be fully commited and have no doubts in his mind if he wants to chop the board in two. He must hit with speed, power and accuracy. If he strikes tentatively, with doubt in his mind, then the cracking sound he hears won't be from the board.

Be fully commited. Non-commitment is ego protection at best, failure inducing at worst.

Onwards...

Low self esteem
Many high schoolers have really low self esteem (read somewhere that around 95% of teenagers have a negative self image). Basically, low self esteem means you don't think you're good at doing anything. The amazing thing is that the ugly, stupid, brash, agressive bum you see in school is probably the one banging your dream girl. So what can this guy do that you can't? Nothing really except...

"He can feel good about himself."

He THINKS he's the sh*t, and thats all that really matters. At HS level, we're all pretty much the same (when we grow up, some of us will drive ferrari's, while others will ride their bicycles, etc.)

All that matters now is whats in here *points to forehead*

The other night, my friend was whining about not having a girlfriend. I tried comforting him but he said "Look fender...no girl wants me. I have nothing to offer to girls..." and he proceeded to try and list some of the positive qualities about himself (he came up with none). The sad thing was, I tried listing what I "had to offer" to girls and...came up with nothing! So is this it?!?! I have NOTHING to offer to my girlfriend?
Then we tried listing what Dan had to offer. "Dan" btw, is the biggest ladies man we know (fingered a girl at 12, and he's currently in a relationship where he gets laid pretty much everyday). And we came up with ONE quality: the ability to make girls feel secure. So is this it?!?! The greatest ladies man I know only has ONE thing he can offer to girls?

Of course not! Girls love us not because of "what we have to offer" and "what we can do" (although they do play a role- a small one). They love us for that special quality in our personalities. My girlfriend loves me for my fenderish charm. Dan attracts chicks with his Dan-ness.

So hopefully, I have succesfuly persuaded you to not to count and worry about the things you "have to offer" and just be confident in yourself and you personality. Realise you are in control of your self image. And once you realise you are in control of that, the world around you is under your command.

Lastly...

Lack of experience
Knowledge doesn't get you laid. Experience does.

Most of us here are lacking in the experience department because of problem no.1: Not taking risks.

You can't gain experience without taking risks and DOING things. I think this topic's been discussed to death around here (what with all the KBJ flaming and all), so I'll keep this section short.

Contrary to popular belief, posting retarded questions on www.sosuave.net will NOT get you more experience. The only thing that will, is going up to the girl and F*CKING ASK FOR HER NUMBER or ASK HER OUT for a F*CKING DATE.

Thank you, and good night.

-fender-
 

InsidiousNstinct

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Great post dude, I myself need to be a little bit more of a risk taker. Also on the topic of fear, once you acknowledge a certain fear you hesitate (sp) and when you hesitate that fear becomes real or in other words becomes reality. And that is one reason why a lot of us guys dont approach I think.
 

superman2k6

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nice post man

it's been emphasised and re-emphasised, you can take 30% of what it's in the bible but if you apply it you will see wayyy more success than you did in the past.

people shouldn't focus on trying to perfect everything in the bible, because then you just sit there in awe of your potential. take something you've read about approaching, and go and do it. you do not need to know NLP and all that to see great success. yes it will help, but you do not need it
 

Fender

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It's pretty natural to have fear when approaching. Even many of the top PUA's who've been in the game for many years get approach anxiety. The problem isn't with the fear itself, its how you handle it.

Some people go into denial about their fear. Some people take deep breaths and try to relax themselves. I personally just get myself into a fun mood and imagine how much fun I'm gonna be in.

From observation, I think many guys in HS respond to this fear by "playing it cool." Basically, they think that if they stand back, chill and pretty much "ignore the girl," she'll somehow magically come to you and have sex with you. Couple that with the misinterpreted advice of "don't be too desperate" that is so common in the seduction community, and we've got loads of teenage boys with lonely willy's.

From a personal standpoint, its great! Think about it:

a) zero risk involved
b) zero effort involved
c) according to the seduction community, she'll LOVE me for ignoring her

Ahhh.......I know seduction is simple, but it ain't THAT simple.

ok, here's how I handle my fear. (bear with me for a few secs...its an imagination excercise :p )

IMAGINE- you're currently in a locked room with a chick. And for some straaange reason, she suddenly wants to have sex with you. Wouldn't life be great? You bet it would!!! But here's the problem...she would only have sex with you at 12:00 midnight. It's only 10:00 pm now. So, you two have 2 hours to burn before you engage in your passionate orgy of love and panties. What would you do? You KNOW you're gonna have sex with her...its only a matter of time. You're trapped in a room...with nothing but each other. Theres only one natural thing to do....talk! You're gonna have a BLAST, laughing with this chick, sharing stories, etc. You're gonna be one CONFIDENT motherf*cker (after all, you know you're gonna have sex with her in 2 hours :D ).

This is the type of attitude you should have when dealing with chicks. Don't be the cool guy! Don't be the clown! Be the guy that KNOWS he's gonna get laid in a few hours. But to kill time, he's having as much FUN as possible in the process.

If you have this kinda attitude, "fear" shouldn't even pop up on your mind when approaching.

-fender-
 
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