Copied from my blog, A Dark Heart
Life is too short to waste your time on pursuits with no a low return on investment. This applies to everything. Dead end argument? Stop. Dead end job? Quit. Dead end relationship? Leave. A issue for a majority of men is approaching life, and dating in particular, with a scarcity mentality and women are all too happy to further this mindset, a la ‘I’m so special you’ll never find another girl like me’. In both dating and relationships, there is a constant flux of interest level, a push-pull which cannot be escaped. The moment you let your guard down and ‘just be yourself’ (a highly misunderstood term) is the moment interest wanes.
Breadth of experience with women, both in quantity and quality, eventually leads to an abundance approach. There is light at the end of the tunnel. You’ve heard that success breeds success. This doesn’t equate to continuing a hot streak or being on a roll, but rather an innate understanding that so long as you focus on becoming the man you envision, you will attract more and more suitable women. You are better today than you were yesterday, right? Right? If you’ve ever started a business and been successful, you gain a degree of confidence in your ability to create value out of thin air, which leads to more businesses and higher levels of success in any field of your choosing.
One of the major tenets of success is effectiveness, not efficiency. There are plenty of efficient workaholics in the world and while a degree of efficiency is necessary, effectiveness, or the prioritization of tasks, is king. The same holds true of your relationships with women. Women, particularly the more attractive ones, have a large network of go-to guys for their needs (the plain janes would too if their looks allowed). They can’t stand being alone, which is why they get a deer in the headlights look when you tell them you’re single and happy. It’s a male thing. There’s her A team, usually a single guy or a very small group to whom she grants sexual rights. Then there’s the B team, a much larger group of guys she’ll go on dates with to string them along in case an A teamer falls off. Then there’s the rest, a vast crowd of orbiters patiently waiting their turn, to whom she will occasionally throw crumbs to keep her in mind, if nothing more. These are the guys who come fix whatever is broken in a vain attempt to get promoted. Of course none of this is publicized, but spend enough time with the hot ones and you’ll see the cogs in the machine.
With only so many hours in the day, every moment spent improving yourself should be approached with ruthlessness, much like the carefully disguised ‘girl harem’. To that end, it is imperative that you weed out low interest women. Knowing who’s interested and who’s not is simple, but the male brain’s default mode of assigning logic and analyzing all nuances tends to cloud better judgement. The medium is the message.
If you text a girl and she doesn’t respond, low interest. Don’t contact her again. Move on.
If you set up a date and she cancels without a counter-offer, low interest. Move on.
If she talks to you via some buffer but refuses to see you, low interest. Move on.
If you’ve been on multiple dates for a month and she still hasn’t put out, low interest. Women know the score. If she’s sexually attracted to you, even if she’s naturally prudish or (more commonly) making amends with her adventurous past in an attempt to secure the highest value man she can attract before hitting the wall, she won’t make you wait too long for fear of losing interest. Move on.
If you’re in a relationship and you’re always calling to see her, to make plans, and generally feel like you’re ‘putting in work’, low interest. Move on.
If you’re on a date and she’s not feeling you or vice versa, eject. You’re not obligated to stick around due to some notion of political correctness. By all means be polite and excuse yourself, but there’s no reason to pursue a path to the friendzone.
‘But that’s going to limit my options’. Yes, but it will also free you to spend your time developing ‘auto game’, better known as becoming a high value man. It will give you the power of choice, the power to reject. This is completely foreign to most men and women (who handle rejection much worse because they’re not as used to it). The higher value you become, the more rejecting you will do. Your standards will rise, you will give your time to those who want it and meet your criteria, and you won’t settle for the B team.
But it won’t happen overnight. Long term success requires a foundation, and much like a pyramid the bottom is the largest piece. In your quest to build the life you want, you will need to develop what nature didn’t give you. There’s no excuse for deficiencies. Some of the greatest lotharios of all time have been average at best by physical standards, with many edging to the repulsive side. It was their aggregate achievements (status, wealth, fame, dominance, and a host of other characteristics) and their creation of their own reality that brought women into their orbit.
Few will see it to the end, because it’s hard work and we live in a world of instant gratification. Do not mistake quick lays for an endless ***** chase. It is a means to a greater end, one of self discovery and mastery in whatever you choose. It is also a natural male mating strategy, much to the chagrin of women and herbs worldwide, but we’ll save that for another day.
Life is too short to waste your time on pursuits with no a low return on investment. This applies to everything. Dead end argument? Stop. Dead end job? Quit. Dead end relationship? Leave. A issue for a majority of men is approaching life, and dating in particular, with a scarcity mentality and women are all too happy to further this mindset, a la ‘I’m so special you’ll never find another girl like me’. In both dating and relationships, there is a constant flux of interest level, a push-pull which cannot be escaped. The moment you let your guard down and ‘just be yourself’ (a highly misunderstood term) is the moment interest wanes.
Breadth of experience with women, both in quantity and quality, eventually leads to an abundance approach. There is light at the end of the tunnel. You’ve heard that success breeds success. This doesn’t equate to continuing a hot streak or being on a roll, but rather an innate understanding that so long as you focus on becoming the man you envision, you will attract more and more suitable women. You are better today than you were yesterday, right? Right? If you’ve ever started a business and been successful, you gain a degree of confidence in your ability to create value out of thin air, which leads to more businesses and higher levels of success in any field of your choosing.
One of the major tenets of success is effectiveness, not efficiency. There are plenty of efficient workaholics in the world and while a degree of efficiency is necessary, effectiveness, or the prioritization of tasks, is king. The same holds true of your relationships with women. Women, particularly the more attractive ones, have a large network of go-to guys for their needs (the plain janes would too if their looks allowed). They can’t stand being alone, which is why they get a deer in the headlights look when you tell them you’re single and happy. It’s a male thing. There’s her A team, usually a single guy or a very small group to whom she grants sexual rights. Then there’s the B team, a much larger group of guys she’ll go on dates with to string them along in case an A teamer falls off. Then there’s the rest, a vast crowd of orbiters patiently waiting their turn, to whom she will occasionally throw crumbs to keep her in mind, if nothing more. These are the guys who come fix whatever is broken in a vain attempt to get promoted. Of course none of this is publicized, but spend enough time with the hot ones and you’ll see the cogs in the machine.
With only so many hours in the day, every moment spent improving yourself should be approached with ruthlessness, much like the carefully disguised ‘girl harem’. To that end, it is imperative that you weed out low interest women. Knowing who’s interested and who’s not is simple, but the male brain’s default mode of assigning logic and analyzing all nuances tends to cloud better judgement. The medium is the message.
If you text a girl and she doesn’t respond, low interest. Don’t contact her again. Move on.
If you set up a date and she cancels without a counter-offer, low interest. Move on.
If she talks to you via some buffer but refuses to see you, low interest. Move on.
If you’ve been on multiple dates for a month and she still hasn’t put out, low interest. Women know the score. If she’s sexually attracted to you, even if she’s naturally prudish or (more commonly) making amends with her adventurous past in an attempt to secure the highest value man she can attract before hitting the wall, she won’t make you wait too long for fear of losing interest. Move on.
If you’re in a relationship and you’re always calling to see her, to make plans, and generally feel like you’re ‘putting in work’, low interest. Move on.
If you’re on a date and she’s not feeling you or vice versa, eject. You’re not obligated to stick around due to some notion of political correctness. By all means be polite and excuse yourself, but there’s no reason to pursue a path to the friendzone.
‘But that’s going to limit my options’. Yes, but it will also free you to spend your time developing ‘auto game’, better known as becoming a high value man. It will give you the power of choice, the power to reject. This is completely foreign to most men and women (who handle rejection much worse because they’re not as used to it). The higher value you become, the more rejecting you will do. Your standards will rise, you will give your time to those who want it and meet your criteria, and you won’t settle for the B team.
But it won’t happen overnight. Long term success requires a foundation, and much like a pyramid the bottom is the largest piece. In your quest to build the life you want, you will need to develop what nature didn’t give you. There’s no excuse for deficiencies. Some of the greatest lotharios of all time have been average at best by physical standards, with many edging to the repulsive side. It was their aggregate achievements (status, wealth, fame, dominance, and a host of other characteristics) and their creation of their own reality that brought women into their orbit.
Few will see it to the end, because it’s hard work and we live in a world of instant gratification. Do not mistake quick lays for an endless ***** chase. It is a means to a greater end, one of self discovery and mastery in whatever you choose. It is also a natural male mating strategy, much to the chagrin of women and herbs worldwide, but we’ll save that for another day.
