help with flirting more sexually

[ne0phyte]

'm new to all of this (just started reading the DJ Bible) and been analyzing my game, and it seems one area I fall flat on is verbalizing my sexuality. I feel like thats a major obstacle keeping me an AFC.

currently, i would describe my game style as comfort + ****y funny. It's really easy for me to neg girls and make them laugh at how ridiculous some of the stuff they say is. girls I've been with tell me "they feel like they've known me for years" (a good thing right?) but i'm not sure how to work in sexuality. right now, after I get the number, and go out, I just go for the k-close and let things progress from there.

i've searched the forum, and they talk about innuendo, saying how girls are bad kissers/ bad in bed. I don't mind doing all that, but how do I work it in without it seeming forced? If I just start talking about bad kissing, it feels cheesy to me, and the girl's going to pick up on that. so what are some innocuous topics that I can steer towards sexual innuendo?

 

[Htienvu]

I am new to this too but I think you should look up Kino Escalation techniques. I am learning about it at the moment, it's about how to slowly make/breaking physical contact with someone you like from the moment you meet untill kiss, sex etc...

 

[Huffman]

BUMP! I need to work on this also!

 

[MurdocNiccals]

To quote myself from another thread:

Haha my female friend told me I "sexually flirt" a lot, I didn't know it was an actual term you guys use...

It's not so hard really, a lot of conversational hooks can be used to steer things that way. She went on holiday to a beach? Bikini tan lines... Topless beaches... Be playful and fun she will roll with most that you say, eg say to her "oh I bet you were visiting all the topless beaches haha " you can take it further after she responds.

Many many hooks can get you into those sorts of conversations.

Don't make sex jokes. Use/create conversational hooks and you can get there in a natural and flirty way where she is likely to respond well. For instance if you have nothing to go on, using the example I just gave of holidays, BRING UP a beach holiday you had, and ask her if she's had any holidays like that, and then you're in.

Most of the time if you are playful they will respond jokingly back (ie "haha yes of course") and you can talk about her tits xD... Dunno how I would, maybe something like "well at least you won't get those weird tan lines on your boobs " and take it further from there.

This is just an example, many many many topics can lead you there!

 

[Huffman]

Great example! Gotta remember that... I'm horribly uncreative
Some things I've got:
- Smoking -> Bad taste in mouth -> Kissing tastes bad (or does it? discuss)
- Long Hair -> Gets in the way all the time -> also when lying in bed -> especially during sex -> ask if she ties her hair back during sex? why (not)?

I'd like to see more.

 

[Franky Four Fingers]

I know some individuals here think it's cheesy but check out http://www.fastseduction.com/guide/ . I personally think there are quite a few good pointers for new guys there on escalation and getting sexual with words.

 

[JimmyMack]

MurdocNiccals and Huffman: I think both the beach and hair suggestions are brilliant.

I feel like I could bring the beach thing up in any context due to any weather or seasonal situation. Also, with the hair, it works whether it's short or long. For example, if it's short, I could ask "have you ever grown your hair long?" and then gradually escalate to the question of "do you think it would be sexier when you're naked because it would be touching more of your skin" etc.

Good stuff guys!

 

[Noodles]

You've got to find something that works for you. I'm a very confident, very loud person. I'm the guy that when I sat a pub with 12 of my friends after the football (soccer for you guys) and one of them says something stupid, stops everyone else from talking so we can rip the piss for ages.

I get away with stuff because I do it with a certain grin. Other people wouldn't. However...I can't get away with stuff my friends do...it just doesn't work coming from me.

- Smoking -> Bad taste in mouth -> Kissing tastes bad (or does it? discuss)
- Long Hair -> Gets in the way all the time -> also when lying in bed -> especially during sex -> ask if she ties her hair back during sex? why (not)?

For instance the kind of stuff I'd say to about those are:
Smoking - 'You good at sucking?'.
Hair - 'Keep your head still babe', grab her hair and say 'I can't wait to holds these reins'.

It's not what you say...it's how you say it. And you're the only person that knows what you can say confidently.

 

[ne0phyte]

good stuff guys, keep it coming. it seems like its all about finding an innoccous transition into the sexual stuff haha. that's what i was having problem with.

 

[MurdocNiccals]

You've got to find something that works for you. I'm a very confident, very loud person. I'm the guy that when I sat a pub with 12 For instance the kind of stuff I'd say to about those are:
Smoking - 'You good at sucking?'.
Hair - 'Keep your head still babe', grab her hair and say 'I can't wait to holds these reins'.

Haha oh dear I'm not sure about that, does it really work for you?

 

[mustfirstregister]

you: Do you sing when you take a shower?
she: Not really
you: Ok we will sing a song together tomorrow.




you: I have a big black cokk at home. Do you want to see it?
she: uh??
you: Show her a picture of your black cokkhttp://i219.photobucket.com/albums/cc302/thebluebus_ph/bigblackcock.jpg

 

[Huffman]

OK i would have said those are kinda lame, but it really depends on the girl. If she likes nasty jokes, they might be good

 

[Veridin]

'm new to all of this (just started reading the DJ Bible) and been analyzing my game, and it seems one area I fall flat on is verbalizing my sexuality. I feel like thats a major obstacle keeping me an AFC.

currently, i would describe my game style as comfort + ****y funny. It's really easy for me to neg girls and make them laugh at how ridiculous some of the stuff they say is. girls I've been with tell me "they feel like they've known me for years" (a good thing right?) but i'm not sure how to work in sexuality. right now, after I get the number, and go out, I just go for the k-close and let things progress from there.

i've searched the forum, and they talk about innuendo, saying how girls are bad kissers/ bad in bed. I don't mind doing all that, but how do I work it in without it seeming forced? If I just start talking about bad kissing, it feels cheesy to me, and the girl's going to pick up on that. so what are some innocuous topics that I can steer towards sexual innuendo?

Give her back massage, sitting up in the couch. Tell her you took an evening class in this in college, but you rarely get a chance to practice. Then while massaging her back, ask if she has ever had face massage. When she says no, tell her to lean back toward you. (Fold one leg so you are not sitting with your legs on each side of her, it is difficult to get out from smoothly.) When you have massaged her face for a while, move your hands to carress her shoulders, arms, and face. Hold her hands and kiss her forehead. Works like a charm.

To learn how to do massage, look it up in Google or in YouTube.

 

[Jariel]

I was at the same stage as you about a year ago, where I was great with the c+f and excellent at building rapport, but I was losing girls on my lack of sexual prowess.

Basically, you just need to work on getting more comfortable with it. Start out on text messages or emails, making innuendos or with comments like "I'm just lying in bed now. Shame I don't have a hot blonde/brunette (or whatever she is) to keep me company" and things like that. Learn how to make suggestive comments based on things they say. Another one I use is "I had a dream about you last night. I'd tell you about it, but it's way too erotic for your innocent mind."

Sometimes you'll get a chick challenge you. They'll ask you to tell them about the dream or what you would do to them if you had the chance. That's your cue to escalate!

Avoid graphic descriptions or anything harsh like cvnt, tw@t and avoid silly words like knob, w!lly and mvff. A good way to learn how to talk dirty is to read some erotic fiction for women, like Mills & Boon.

Once you're comfortable doing this kind of thing via text/email, it will get easier doing it in person.

Before you get to that stage it's common to fear offending the chick or appearing too forward, but if she likes you then you can take it much further than you think. Come to think of it, I've never had a chick respond negatively to this. The worst case scenario is they dismiss it or don't flirt back.

If you do find a girl who's offended by it and who b!tches at you, then ask yourself if they're really worth pursuing. Uptight girls like that are no fun and are the reason men repress their sexuality.

As long as you're not suddenly groping or trying to take their clothes off, you'll get very positive responses.

 

[MurdocNiccals]

Another one I use is "I had a dream about you last night. I'd tell you about it, but it's way too erotic for your innocent mind."

Wow that's strange! I said practically the same exact thing to a girl a few weeks ago.

She had just woken up so I asked her if she was too busy dreaming about me to get up, and she was all jokingly like "yeah of course hahaha" so I was like "I'm afraid I only dreamt about you twice this week" and she was all " but I dream about you every night!" and I go "Well they were very nice dreams if that makes up for it." She goes "What happens in them?" And I said something like "I would tell you but you're far too innocent" that's when she started protesting "No I'm not!" etc etc.

 

[Jariel]

Wow that's strange! I said practically the same exact thing to a girl a few weeks ago.

She had just woken up so I asked her if she was too busy dreaming about me to get up, and she was all jokingly like "yeah of course hahaha" so I was like "I'm afraid I only dreamt about you twice this week" and she was all " but I dream about you every night!" and I go "Well they were very nice dreams if that makes up for it." She goes "What happens in them?" And I said something like "I would tell you but you're far too innocent" that's when she started protesting "No I'm not!" etc etc.

haha, nice!! It always seems to get them intrigued. Sometimes I hold back and tease them, "Oh, it's probably not something I should tell you" to the point where they're begging or playfully threatening me.

And if you ever tease girls about being too innocent it drives them mad and is almost guaranteed to bring out their bad side.