Help - can’t finish

[Hamurabimbi]

It happens. I don’t think it has anything to do with her being attractive or not. Kind of like ED.

 

[Toddy]

To add I’m 48, not had this problem before, probably the opposite, been over quicker than I’d like. I’m in great shape been hitting the gym 3-4 times per week for 20 years, plus jiu jitsu 3-4 times per week.

 

[Toddy]

It happens. I don’t think it has anything to do with her being attractive or not. Kind of like ED.

Thought this might also be the case with age, hope it’s just a passing thing.

 

[Toddy]

I do not think his issue is related to elevated prolactin levels. But B6 may increase sensitivity for him the way it did for you.

I also haven't researched dosages, so he'd need to do his own or go with your suggestion.

I think he has a boobie fixation.

Thanks both, will explore more and try out.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Thought this might also be the case with age, hope it’s just a passing thing.

Try having her lie on her back and you on your side. Enter her that way.

 

[Toddy]

Update - smashed a few more times, managed to finish about 50% of the time. Hoping things will improve as I’ve stopped fapping.

 

[Divorced w 3]

My girl loves to jump on top of me first thing in the morning. If I get a good nights sleep I am game but if I don’t it’s not likely I am going to finish. I need to truly wake up, have a coffee and get my blood flowing in situations like that. If you understand where your particular strengths and weaknesses lie you can address them like anything else. As long as she gets off she won’t care too much if you don’t as long as it’s not a regular thing. If it is a regular thing yes you’re going to eventually give her a complex.

 

[CornbreadFed]

This is what we call the "fit" and you do not have it with this girl.

 

[Toddy]

My girl loves to jump on top of me first thing in the morning. If I get a good nights sleep I am game but if I don’t it’s not likely I am going to finish. I need to truly wake up, have a coffee and get my blood flowing in situations like that. If you understand where your particular strengths and weaknesses lie you can address them like anything else. As long as she gets off she won’t care too much if you don’t as long as it’s not a regular thing. If it is a regular thing yes you’re going to eventually give her a complex.

Thanks, she’s definitely getting off even when I don’t finish. I’ll just try to relax and not worry about it.

 

[The Duke]

Thanks, she’s definitely getting off even when I don’t finish. I’ll just try to relax and not worry about it.

Tell her to start doing Kegl exercises. Tighten that pu$$y up.

 

[Toddy]

Tell her to start doing Kegl exercises. Tighten that pu$$y up.

It’s tight already, no kids, and she’s very petite. Might try some exercises myself though

 

[Fruitbat]

In my experience 90% of little man issues are in one’s head.

I seriously thought I had ED until I quit weed (this was the main thing. I personally believe a THC habit is a massive libido killer and I wonder why this is why weed culture is pumped into young people, to keep them docile and complaint)

I also changed my diet for non processed foods and started booking time out to destress.

now you might think “that’s physical” but all these things led to anxiety. I was a paranoid and anxious bag of nerves. The change was so dramatic and rapid and the change in my mood and thinking so pronounced that actually my lifestyle led to anxiety which led to no interest in sexhs.

In summary it’s probably in your mind or you might not like the girl.

Not actually finishing isn’t something that’s happened to me other than when I’ve been beating off too much in my free time or having sex too often. My refractory period now in early 40s is about 4-8 hours but I only really want it every 24-48.

stress is the main killer. Could you be stressed mate?

 

[Fruitbat]

It’s tight already, no kids, and she’s very petite. Might try some exercises myself though

In my experience, body size isn’t linked to tightness. Where she is in her cycle is the main one. Right after period is the tight time.

it’s a horrible quirk of fate that the time it’s uncomfortable for her it feels the best for us. I’ve felt like I’m pushing into a nostril just after the painters have gone which you have to say is a very sensual experience for a man but it’s not for her, hence one must resist the urge to push through and remain a gentleman

 

[Toddy]

In my experience 90% of little man issues are in one’s head.

I seriously thought I had ED until I quit weed (this was the main thing. I personally believe a THC habit is a massive libido killer and I wonder why this is why weed culture is pumped into young people, to keep them docile and complaint)

I also changed my diet for non processed foods and started booking time out to destress.

now you might think “that’s physical” but all these things led to anxiety. I was a paranoid and anxious bag of nerves. The change was so dramatic and rapid and the change in my mood and thinking so pronounced that actually my lifestyle led to anxiety which led to no interest in sexhs.

In summary it’s probably in your mind or you might not like the girl.

Not actually finishing isn’t something that’s happened to me other than when I’ve been beating off too much in my free time or having sex too often. My refractory period now in early 40s is about 4-8 hours but I only really want it every 24-48.

stress is the main killer. Could you be stressed mate?

Thanks, not stressed. But new relationship so only been at it for a few weeks. Seems my recovery is like three days. I’ll be able smash daily but only finish every other one or so. Went away for a few days and had a few sessions over a few hours and was only able to finish the once. After a few days rest I’ll be able to finish.
You’re right it’s probably in my head, first time it happened I was paranoid it would happen the next time but fortunately was able to finish. She’s been really cool about.

 

[Toddy]

In my experience, body size isn’t linked to tightness. Where she is in her cycle is the main one. Right after period is the tight time.

it’s a horrible quirk of fate that the time it’s uncomfortable for her it feels the best for us. I’ve felt like I’m pushing into a nostril just after the painters have gone which you have to say is a very sensual experience for a man but it’s not for her, hence one must resist the urge to push through and remain a gentleman

Thanks, I’m always a gent

 

[Divorced w 3]

In my experience 90% of little man issues are in one’s head.

I seriously thought I had ED until I quit weed (this was the main thing. I personally believe a THC habit is a massive libido killer and I wonder why this is why weed culture is pumped into young people, to keep them docile and complaint)

I also changed my diet for non processed foods and started booking time out to destress.

now you might think “that’s physical” but all these things led to anxiety. I was a paranoid and anxious bag of nerves. The change was so dramatic and rapid and the change in my mood and thinking so pronounced that actually my lifestyle led to anxiety which led to no interest in sexhs.

In summary it’s probably in your mind or you might not like the girl.

Not actually finishing isn’t something that’s happened to me other than when I’ve been beating off too much in my free time or having sex too often. My refractory period now in early 40s is about 4-8 hours but I only really want it every 24-48.

stress is the main killer. Could you be stressed mate?

Sex on weed is the absolute best imo. Not even remotely close.

I do agree though, it’s likely mental. I get a lot of anxiety in this thread from OP, which I can totally relate to. I had this girl like ten days after my separation that I met on tinder. She was a complete minx. I think we banged like 9x in 48 hours. Nothing was off limits. She knew my entire situation did not care. I think I busted like once. It was all mental. She didn’t care either months later when I hit her back up. My stress was on a different planet. And then from there it just snowballed. I think OP needs to be open with his girl, who he is lucky to have supporting him. Just tell her that he’s uncomfortable, that he is in his head. If she has any compassion she will totally understand.It’s a lot easier to work through this with a regular caring partner. I would not want to be where I was a couple years ago figuring this out as a single guy. He’s in a good spot. It’ll pass. Go to the store together and talk about getting new beds. Walk through the mental imagery of why that bed would be good for you both. We did this the other day at crate and barrel. There was a nice king size bed in there for like 2k. We’re standing there in public talking in code about how hard I’m going to smash her on it. Have fun with it. You’ll be okay.

 

[logicallefty]

Just starting seeing this chick, really dig her. Starting to smash, problem is I can’t ***, I went for an hour nothing not even close. She’s starting to think it’s her. She’s got a great body, but no boobs and I’m a boobs man. Am I doomed, any suggestions on how to ***.

not been fapping for ages either.

Any advice greatly appreciated

Possible issues:
1) You aren't attracted to her as much as you may think you are or want to be
2) You are putting something into your body that is causing it like a perscription, food, alchohol, etc.
3) You are under stress in life and it's negatively effecting you
4) You are just tired, maybe working too much or not getting enough sleep for whatever reason
5) You are nervous
6) You are getting old and these things can happen. an ED pill may help.

It's funny because women hate it when we finish too quick, and then they hate it when we go too long. Next thing you know they will be bringing stop watches to the bedroom and then be on Tik-Tock saying that "If I man finishes in less than 6 minutes 6 seconds or takes longer than 12 minutes and 32 seconds, leave him! You deserve better Girlfriend!!"

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Tell her to start doing Kegl exercises. Tighten that pu$$y up.

or squats.

 

[Toddy]

Sex on weed is the absolute best imo. Not even remotely close.

I do agree though, it’s likely mental. I get a lot of anxiety in this thread from OP, which I can totally relate to. I had this girl like ten days after my separation that I met on tinder. She was a complete minx. I think we banged like 9x in 48 hours. Nothing was off limits. She knew my entire situation did not care. I think I busted like once. It was all mental. She didn’t care either months later when I hit her back up. My stress was on a different planet. And then from there it just snowballed. I think OP needs to be open with his girl, who he is lucky to have supporting him. Just tell her that he’s uncomfortable, that he is in his head. If she has any compassion she will totally understand.It’s a lot easier to work through this with a regular caring partner. I would not want to be where I was a couple years ago figuring this out as a single guy. He’s in a good spot. It’ll pass. Go to the store together and talk about getting new beds. Walk through the mental imagery of why that bed would be good for you both. We did this the other day at crate and barrel. There was a nice king size bed in there for like 2k. We’re standing there in public talking in code about how hard I’m going to smash her on it. Have fun with it. You’ll be okay.

Thanks appreciate it, thankfully she’s been really good about it. Hopefully as I settle in to it a bit more I’ll be back to normal

 

[Toddy]

Possible issues:
1) You aren't attracted to her as much as you may think you are or want to be
2) You are putting something into your body that is causing it like a perscription, food, alchohol, etc.
3) You are under stress in life and it's negatively effecting you
4) You are just tired, maybe working too much or not getting enough sleep for whatever reason
5) You are nervous
6) You are getting old and these things can happen. an ED pill may help.

It's funny because women hate it when we finish too quick, and then they hate it when we go too long. Next thing you know they will be bringing stop watches to the bedroom and then be on Tik-Tock saying that "If I man finishes in less than 6 minutes 6 seconds or takes longer than 12 minutes and 32 seconds, leave him! You deserve better Girlfriend!!"

Thanks, everything is good. Well May be the attraction, she’s got an amazing figure but no boobs. I’ve cut back a bit too on jiu jitsu I was doing it sometimes twice a day 5 days a week, now down to 3-4 sessions a week, so hopefully more energy.